SEX SEX SEX (not actual intercourse but fun anyways) -just a warning!

Also broken hearts and tears.

I woke up the next morning to Lily-Luna still sleeping beside me. Her shirt rode up and the sheet was resting on her hips, leaving a strip of stomach bare. I wanted to wake her up the best way possible so I peeked out into the room and saw we were alone before moving down to the foot of the bed with the sheets. She rolled onto her back, making my job a lot easier as I spread her legs gently.

I sucked marks into her inner thighs before kissing to her bare pussy. She was a little wet, but I could fix that easily. I parted her folds with my fingers and licked just above her clit to start working her up. Then I moved down to her entrance, pushing my tongue inside and tasting her happily. I'd never been so content to eat a girl out, but I could honestly spend hours between her legs.

"Good morning to you, too," she said sleepily, making me look up at her with my tongue still lapping at her entrance. "This is the best wake up call I've ever gotten."

I grinned and started rubbing her clit with my thumb as I moved my tongue in and out of her. It was different than how I'd gone down on her last night, I wanted her to get the full treatment. When I looked up at her, I saw her tugging her nipples and sucking her bottom lip into her mouth. The pure sex that poured off her had me sliding my hand down between my thighs and working a few fingers inside me.

"Are you touching yourself, lovey?" she asked, moving up onto her elbows so she could watch me.

I sat up from her and leaned back against the footboard with my legs open. I slid my fingers through my folds again, feeling her eyes on me as I did. She moved her body to mirror mine, but her hand rested on the bottom of her belly nervously.

"I've never fingered myself, only rubbed my clit," she told me, her eyes fixated on my lazily stroking fingers. "I don't know what to do."

"You're wet enough it shouldn't be a problem," I told her, sliding two fingers inside me and whimpering. "Just rub your clit and do what feels right, kitten."

She nodded and licked her lips, rubbing her clit timidly as she watched me. After a couple minutes of that, I watched her slid a slow finger inside herself. She thrust it a couple times and I watched her eyes close in pleasure, that's exactly what she should feel like.

"That's it, pretty girl," I coached, moving my fingers faster against myself.

I hit my g-spot and my orgasm rushed through me at the sight of her fucking herself furiously. As the waves of my orgasm worked through me, I moved up to help her get there. I straddled her thigh and sucked her nipple into my mouth, sucking and lapping with a bit of teeth.

"Harder," she moaned. "Bite harder."

I groaned at that and did as she instructed, working her nipples over with my teeth. I was grinding on her thigh as she gripped my hip, moving me faster over her. I could tell by the look on her face she was close so I focused on getting her there, my hips still moving.

"Shit, Ari," she whined as her orgasm raced through her, her hips bucking and making her knee hit my entrance just right to make me cum all over her.

I leaned against her, trying to catch my breath as she laughed airily before pushing her sticky fingers into my mouth. I licked them clean and practically purred in contentment.

"Was that sex?" she asked a couple minutes later with me still straddling her thigh. "It felt a lot like sex."

I laughed and moved off her, seeing her thigh still shiny from my orgasm. "Let's go get cleaned up and talk about what happened, yeah?"

She nodded and followed behind me into the shower, her arms around my waist as I turned on the water. I'd never showered with someone before and it felt a lot more intimate than I imagined it would. It wasn't sexual, it was just sweet and caring especially when she scrubbed her fingers in my hair.

I spent a lot of time drying her off and she did the same, each of us pausing to kiss while we were getting dressed. It was sweet and loving, I really hated that it would be over the second we left our room.

"Luna, can we talk for a second?" I asked nervously, fiddling with the sleeve of my top. "You asked if that was sex earlier and I think it could be, except we made ourselves cum. If we'd been like that except my fingers were inside you and yours were inside me, it would've been sex."

She nodded and came over to sit on my lap, her knees on either side of my hips. "I want to have sex with you, Aria. I'm just reluctant to do that until I'm out, you know? I want to lose my virginity to someone I'm with."

I tried to not show her how broken my heart was. She didn't want to have sex with me because I wasn't her girlfriend and her feelings for me weren't strong enough for her to come out. I had no idea heartbreak felt like this and I wasn't a fan. I was looking just past her shoulder, trying my best to keep my tears at bay until I was away from her.

"I forgot I have to go help Hayden and J'mari study for Transfigurations," I told her, my voice breathy. "I'll talk to you later, okay?"

She'd just gotten off my lap when I left the room, trying my best to not run like I wanted. I hoped J'mari was in his room and I wasn't disappointed, he and Hayden were both upstairs. Their roommate Cormac was naked by his bed and screamed when I came in, but I just ignored him.

"Oi, she's gay, you knob!" Hayden shouted.

J'mari was just looking at me with my bare face and my messy hair, tears streaming down my face. He slipped further back on his bed and opened his arms to me, holding me close as I cried against his chest. Hayden was clueless what was wrong, but he came over and rubbed my back regardless. My entire body hurt hurt, and my chest felt like it was aching.

"She doesn't like me enough to come out," I sobbed, wetting his shirt. "We were so close this morning and then she told me she wanted to lose her virginity to someone she was with! And that someone isn't me."

Hayden swore colorfully, but J'mari stayed strong underneath me and brushed my hair out of my face. "You need to breathe, love. You're going to make yourself sick."

I shook my head and took a couple gasping breaths. "I haven't eaten any food this morning, I won't have anything to be sick on."

I knew the situation was serious because Hayden didn't make a joke about me eating something else. Instead, he shouted for Cormac to get lost so the three of us were alone. I cried for a little while longer before my tears dried and I was just laying against J'mari with my eyes closed.

"Do you guys want to fill me in on what's happening?" Hayden asked, giving me a water bottle from under his bed. "Drink this so you don't get dehydrated, Ri."

I nodded and took a couple swallows of the cool water, the fire in my throat cooling drastically. J'mari started telling Hayden about me and Lily-Luna, making him frown and rub my back. J'mari's arms were still around me, refusing to let me out of touching distance right now.

"Last night she told me she chose me because she fancies me and I told her it was okay to keep us a secret, but I lied," I whimpered, more tears gathering behind my eyes. "I can't be as close to her as I was this morning and go back to her acting like we're not together. It hurts too much."

"I already told her she has to stop putting Lily-Luna's emotions before hers," J'mari added, wiping my cheeks with his thumbs. "You're important, too, Aria. It doesn't make you a bad person to stop doing this."

"I don't want to stop, that's the worst part. I love being this close to her," I cried, feeling smaller than small. "I'm so pathetic."

"I'm going to go sneak some food from the Great Hall," Hayden announced, kissing my head and bumping fists with J'mari before he left the dorm.

He laid back against his pillows and pulled me to his chest, running his fingers through my hair and rubbing my scalp soothingly. They were rambunctious and loud, but they were also the very best friends a girl could ever have. I couldn't imagine anywhere else I'd rather be, crying over a broken heart except for maybe with my mum.

"You need to stop putting yourself through this, love," he told me in a quiet, calm voice. "I know you fancy her, but there a hundred other girls in this school who are out and don't want to keep you a secret. Melanie Ortega included and Merlin knows Anna Haddix would love to get another sample of those mad fingering skills."

"Shut up!" I chided, hitting his chest with my hand. "I got snot on your shirt."

He groaned but didn't complain, he just cleaned it with magic and handed me some tissues. I wiped my nose and my eyes, going into the bathroom to wash my face. The room was disgusting, underwear and toilet paper was scattered all over the place. I just rolled my eyes and conjured a flannel and ran it under water.

My face was swollen and blotchy, anyone who looked at me could tell I'd been bawling my eyes out. I ran the rag over my eyes and let it sit there for a minute or so, trying to make them stop hurting. The ache in my chest was enough to deal with. Once I realized there was no saving my face, I went back onto the boys' room and saw a small feast sitting on the floor.

"How'd you sneak this much food?" I asked sitting between the two of them. "I got in trouble for taking a biscuit the other day that I'd already eaten most of."

"Never underestimate me," he replied, but I wasn't convinced and he knew it. "The Great Hall was empty so I just threw half the table into my bag and ran like something was chasing me."

I laughed at the visual before taking a piece of toast and taking a bite. I wasn't really hungry, but I knew the two of them wouldn't let me get away with not eating. I saw J'mari watching me out of the corner of his eye, he wasn't even trying to make it look like he was eating.

"What do I do now?" I asked after I finished my toast and drank some more water. "I don't want to stop being with her, but I don't think I can handle feeling like this all the time."

"Talk to her about it and then see where you stand," Hayden suggested before shoveling eggs into his mouth and making a ghost of a smile tug at my lips. "There my Ri, I missed her."

I stayed with them a little while longer before I put on my big girl panties and headed to find Lily-Luna. I was a bit surprised when I found her and Hugo sitting in her bed in the dorm. She looked confused and jumped out of her bed when she saw me, wrapping her arms around me tight.

"I'm so sorry for whatever I did!" she said against my neck, tears wetting my skin. "I'm an idiot and I am so sorry! I don't want you to hurt!"

I patted her back and eyed Hugo, but he just shrugged and left us alone in the dormitory. That kid didn't talk a lot, even when I needed him to. I had no idea why she was upset…

"Luna, can we talk? Again?" I asked, slapping myself for how stupid that sounded. "Except, actually talk instead of touching each other this time."

She nodded and sat across from me on the bed, wiping her eyes on the sleeve of her jumper before pulling her knees up and resting her chin on them. It didn't look like she'd been crying before I came on, but quiet tears were tracing down her cheeks now and her bottom lip was trembling.

"I lied to you last night, I can't do what we're doing and then have you act like we're just friends in public," I told her, lying all my cards out on the table. "I really want to be your girlfriend, Luna. Your public girlfriend. I'm not asking you to let me eat you out at dinner, I just want to hold your hand and kiss your cheek in the common room. I want to wear your jersey on game days. I want everyone to know you're my girl."

She flinched and moved over her knees so she was closer to me. "I want that, too, Ari. I just can't come out right now, I'm not ready."

I sighed in frustration and turned to look at her fully. "I'm not trying to make you do anything, I just want to be with you all the time instead of just the middle of the night in your bed. I feel like I'm your dirty secret or something, like you're ashamed of me."

I left that part out when I was talking to J'mari and Hayden, it would've only made things worse. They were already angry with Lily-Luna, I didn't want them irate with her. She looked perplexed at the suggestion of that and was worrying her bottom lip with her teeth.

"I'm not ashamed of you, Aria," she told me, a hint of desperation behind her voice. "Nothing about you is a dirty secret, at least you weren't supposed to be."

I laughed humorlessly at that and stood up from her bed. "I think we should just end this before my heart gets anymore broken. I really care about you, Luna, but I can't be a secret anymore. It's destroying me on the inside, I feel like my heart's been shredded."

"I am so sorry, that wasn't my intention," she told me in a thick voice. "I never meant to hurt you."

I just left her there and went downstairs, hoping to clear my head and dull the ache in my chest.

Aria's friendship with J'mari and Hayden is very important to me and I'm trying to make it important to the story line.

Anyways, thanks for reading!