He was grateful that Thursday's let out early, as he headed home, in more of a hurry than he could ever remember being. He was exhausted, wiped even, after two nights of no sleep. And only one of them had been otherwise occupied with fun athletics and the joy of having Linden back. Last night... last night was just rough. He had only slept lightly, maybe even just dozed, the last half of the night, on guard for Sarah...whom he was pretty sure hadn't slept a wink the rest of the night. He was anxious to get home and make sure she was alright... and, if he was totally honest, still there. Typical Linden, always worryin' him, he thought with a wry smile.

He'd planned on stopping at the store to pick up all of the necessary cupcake supplies for Kalia's party, but decided instead that he preferred to lay eyes on Linden and make sure she was still in the right State. Plus, he was thinking a night on the town, out and about, might do her some good. So they could just hit the grocery store on the way home from that, instead.

Rather than wait for the elevator, he took the stairs two at a time to his floor. This apartment was bigger than his old one, but with Linden here now, he definitely wanted to get out of the apartment and into a house. A place for a family. When he got to the door he listened a minute, but all was quiet. He had been half hoping to hear her rattling around inside, but then he supposed that she wasn't exactly a noisy sort...well...except... Focus, Holder, he chided himself and stuck his key in the lock.

The apartment was as quiet on the inside as it was on the outside, but his eyes gravitated to her small form, asleep on the couch. She had tucked herself into a tight ball, her face pinched, holding all of her tension in even in sleep. Poor Linden. Living with that head of hers, her memories, her trauma, sure wasn't easy. From across the room, he felt helpless to help her and for the first time, doubted his adamant insistence that she could be happy, that they would be happy, and that him "having her back" could fix everything. He never wanted to let her down. He just watched her for a minute, trying to push the doubt aside. It had to be gone before she woke up, for sure, he thought. She needed his confidence, not doubt.

He stayed where he was another minute, and was just going to go change when she jerked in her sleep and let out a noise that was part sigh, part whimper. He changed course and strode over to kneel beside her, brushing stray strands of hair from her face and resting a hand on her shoulder, intending to sooth her. She recoiled at his touch and her eyes flew open, tinged with silent panic. "S'alright, Linden. Didn't mean to wake you."

She shook her head, a small, sharp shake as if she was clearing it. "I wasn't sleeping very well anyways." She admitted quietly. "When'd you get back?"

"Few minutes ago. What'd you do today?"

"Went for a really long run. Read one of your books." Her shoulder shrugged under his hand. "I've had a nasty headache all day." she admitted.

"Well, you got out, at least." He traced her jawline with the back of his fingers and then shifted. As he moved he tried to guide her gently to a half-seated position so he could sit and rest her head in his lap, but she sat all the way up instead, looking slightly uncomfortable and typically Linden. "Where's the headache?"

"My head." she rolled her eyes.

"Ever the literalist." he shook his head slightly, trying to not feel exasperated. "Here?" He touched a finger to her temple. "Here?" He moved his finger to just over her ear. "Or here?" He massaged two fingers into the back of her neck at the very base of her skull and was rewarded with a groan as she pressed back into his hand. "There, huh?" Was he good or what? He massaged deeper into her neck and smiled as she moaned and dropped her head, giving him full access for his ministrations. "Feels good, hmm?" He murmured against her ear a minute later, then moved to the base of her neck and her shoulders and enjoyed how she felt underneath his hands, how the tension melted from her body.

"Go back up." she mumbled a couple of minutes later. Who was he to argue? It was daylight, and she was wholly unguarded, and turning to putty under his hands. Plus, the appreciative little noises she was making were making his body...equally appreciative. Finally he stopped, slipped his arms around her and pulled her back against him, placing a soft kiss on the top of her head just because he could, just because he wanted to...Just because it felt right.

"Better?" He asked, his lips still in her hair. She smelled like coconut.

"Mmmhmmm." She leaned into him and rested against him. "Thank you."

"It's no thing." he turned his head to rub his cheek over the top of hers, thinking that he could just stay like this all evening. Except he hadn't hit the grocery store. So they had to go out. Right. He'd almost forgotten. He got up, bringing her with him easily. "C'mon, Linden. We got stuff to do tonight."

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"Well, got a little girl who's got a birthday party on Saturday, with a specific request for strawberry lemonade cupcakes. So we gotta go out and buy us some shit to make em."

"Oh, so you're a baker now?" She raised one eyebrow at him, her lips twisted in a smirk that looked kind of more like disbelief. Ohhhhh, Linden, you wanna play that game?

"You know how we do. Anything for my princess. But since you're feeling all skeptical like, you can help me." He grinned, swatting her hip playfully. A light danced through her eyes in response and he considered himself well rewarded. "Before that, though, I'm gonna feed my woman. Bet it's been a while since you've had fresh, west coast seafood. C'mon." Before she had time to think, react, or try to argue with his plan, he grabbed her hand and tugged her out the door.

"Wow, Linden, you gonna pop? I've never seen you put that much food away in a week, never mind a day!" Holder chortled as Linden leaned back in her chair with a groan.

"I might. God, there actually is something I missed about Seattle." She was so full she literally felt like she was going to explode, but she almost wished she had more shrimp. It had been a fabulous meal, she'd missed fresh seafood without even realizing it...and Holder's constant discussions about his sister and nephews and Kalia, interspersed with random bits of information - apparently he still watched discovery channel - kept her preoccupied and entertained. And his face.. that face sitting across the table from her. She hadn't realized how dear it was to her until she'd left. Until she'd missed him. And sitting across from him again, looking at his face, his smiling eyes, and his goofy grin just made her so... happy, she guessed. She didn't really know what word described it...but whatever it was, it reached beyond the tendrils of fear that still lingered, somewhere beneath, and made her whole world feel bright and open.

"Shred my heart, why don'tcha, Linden. I'm chopped liver now?"

"You're a someONE, not a thing." She shot him what she hoped was a cheeky grin, then added "But you're welcome to just leave me here." She'd just sleep off round one and order round two.

"Not happening, Linden, you belong to me, not to the shrimp. If you're realllllyyy nice to me I might bring you back, though." he suggested, shooting her a lascivious wink.

"Is that how you pick up women?" she scoffed. "Shrimp and conditional promises?" Belonged to him? What the hell?

"Working, ain't it?" He grinned then pushed to his feet. "Come on, lets walk off some of this food before you explode." He swore he heard a sarcastic "charming" muttered under her breath, and he was thrilled to know he had managed to goad her a bit. He handed the waitress the bill and a wad of cash on the way out the door, waving her off when she tried to give him change. Then he slung an arm around Linden's neck and led her off down the pier. They strolled along the warf hand in hand, the sound of boats and water and people all melding together.

Holder kept up his steady commentary of inane chatter, and she was content to just listen to his voice wash over her as they walked. He talked about everything and nothing, which was good because she was too distracted by the feel of her hand tucked tightly in his to really register what exactly he is saying. Eventually he drew her to a stop, in a quiet area and gestured towards the view.

"Nothin' like it, Linden. Vast, powerful...more powerful than us."

Standing beside him, looking out across the sound, she felt almost as if the years were melting away. And beside her, solid as a rock, was Holder. Her rock. He always had been. The sound, the ocean, might be more powerful than her, but she felt like Holder was the only one who could keep her grounded, THE person she could be herself with, who would accept her at her worst. Holder was the most powerful thing to her, and for her. He had the power to break her, and the power to save her.

"Jack miss the water?"

She thought that probably Holder was the only person who could make Seattle safe for her, who could keep the dead away. His steadfast loyalty was more than she deserved, more than she ever thought she'd have.

"Linden?" He turned to look at her. "You hearing me?"

"Sorry... I just... I'm just...I'm so grateful. For you. I'm just so, so, SO grateful to have you in my life." She admitted, making direct eye contact with him. She still found it hard, to open up. But as scary as it was, it also felt very right. And seeing the joy on his face made her heart jump.

"Well, I love you TOO, Sarah Linden." His tone was goofy and emphatic, as if he was half joking, but she knew from the shine in his eyes that he meant it. She wondered if anyone had ever looked at her with that kind of love and devotion in their eyes. She blinked back the sudden wetness in hers as he pulled her into a tight hug and lifted her, her legs automatically wrapping around his waist, so that they were eye level with each other. He lifted a hand to brush a few stray hairs away from her eyes and brushed her lips gently with his before letting her down, ever so slowly.

"We should head back." She suggested, and her voice sounded breathy even to her.

"So soon? I think you need to work off more of that shrimp." he argued.

"I can think of more effective ways to work it off than walking." She quipped, sliding her hand into the far back pocket of his jeans. And oh, she could tell that he liked the suggestion because he shot her a wide grin.

"You dialin', tonight, 1-900?" his hand grazed down her back and then slung casually around her waist.

"You answering?"

"Might be. But first, we gotta hit the grocery store."

He'd intended to make short work of the grocery store stop, but it ended up taking longer than he'd planned as he educated on her on the importance of selecting the right flour for non-gluten-free non-vegan cupcakes. Not that he knew a damned thing about that shit, flour was flour as far as he was concerned, but he'd make shit up all night if it kept her relaxed and laughing with that soft look in her eyes and the past the furthest thing from her mind.

"Where do you GET this stuff?" She finally asked him on a breath of disbelief when he let her get a word in edgewise. He bounced on his heels a bit and grinned down at her. He was sure he looked like a kid who'd just been handed a prize, but laughing, joking, teasing Linden was one hell of a prize, to him. She stepped sideways and bumped her shoulder into his side. "I mean, seriously, Holder. How do you know so much about temple-violating gluten?"

"Hey, gotta keep tabs on your enemy, y'Know?"

"MMhm." She laughed again, looking up at him, and he used his body to guide her path around the corner so she wouldn't run into anything. This was awesome, teasing and distracting Linden in a grocery store. He definitely had to add it to his list of favorite things. (It was starting to be a really long list, and 95% of it featured Linden. And if he was being totally honest, probably a good 50% of that 95% featured Linden without clothes).

"Holy Shit. Sarah Linden." Another voice broke in as they rounded the corner and he felt the laughter drain from her body. He looked up and there was Reddick, staring at Linden like she was a ghost. He glanced at her and saw a similar expression on her face. Shit. There went all of his evening's hard work, taking her mind off the past. Suddenly he wished he'd have thought this through better. He felt like she was going to step back, so he reached out and placed a hand on her back, just at the base of her shoulder blades. He was glad that she felt slightly uncomfortable under his hand, but not outright tense.

"Carl." She greeted back.

"Thought you were long gone."

"I was."

"And now she's back. Great, ain't it?" Holder broke in, gently wiggling his fingers on her back so she remembered that he had her. He was well aware that Reddick noticed his hand placement when Reddick shot him a "I knew it" smirk. Bastard. He moved to go around Reddick and keep going, not caring if it was rude, when Reddick cut off his escape.

"Where you working, these days?"

He felt her take a shallow breath, and tried to will her not to panic through his touch. "Hey, give the woman some breathing room, Carl. She only just got back, right?"

Reddick shot him a look. "Well, we have an opening at Seattle PD. You should come in."

"I'm not going back." She stated immediately.

"Think about it. We could really use you. Homicide is full of a bunch of egomaniac yahoos right now. Need someone with a conscience to ride herd over them."

"I'm not working Homicide again."

Enough was enough. Linden's tension was ratcheting up and he was soooo not ending this night with all of his hard, relax-Linden work undone. Woman needed to sleep tonight, dammit. "Hey, listen, Reddick. Nice seein' ya, but we got places to be so we better get going."

"Offer's open, Linden. If you change your mind, come see me." Then, he kind of looked sideways at both of them and then caught Holder's eye and half smirked. "You know...I always knew there was something." His eyes gestured bewteen the two.

"You want me to punch you again?" Holder phrased his warning as a question, steering them around Reddick and away. He left his hand on her back and started in again, about baking soda this time.

"Wait, are there even different kinds?"

"Well, if there are..."

"You're SO weird." She rolled her eyes, and then he had her laughing again, thank god.

"What did Reddick mean?" She asked him later, as they were unpacking groceries, all domestic like. "About knowing there was something."

"Ohhh, who knows. You know Carl, always shootin' his mouth."

"No, he meant something. And you know what or you wouldn't be redirecting. What is it, Holder?" Shit... Well, it served him right for not stopping at the grocery store right after work, he supposed.

"Ahhhh... Well, just before you came back to the PD for the Pied Piper case, he may have suggested that the reason I disagreed with him about you bein' a bad first partner for me was because of the extra curricular activities I got to enjoy with you on the car."

"WHAT?!"

"Hey! I told him that that wasn't how it was! I told him the only extra-curricular activity we had goin' on with that car was you kickin' me out of it and drivin' off!"

He watched as Sarah leaned back slightly, digesting his words. It took her a minute. "I did not!"

"Yea, Y'did."

"Hardly ever." She disagreed.

"ALL. THE. TIME. Linden. You made an Olympic sport outta kickin' me outta that car, at first."

"I... well... you were..." she kept changing her words, and then she sighed. "I was actually really a bitch, wasn't I?"

"Well, I just kept pickin' at ya. Probably didn't help."

"Probably not." She agreed. "Why did you?"

""Cause. You were an enigma. All zen with the crime scenes and smart and intuitive... Not to mention incredibly fucking hot, even in those ugly assed sweaters you wore.. and you were this puzzle that made no sense. Sonoma, no Sonoma, missing flights, Jack...Someone with a whole life to go to - and I envied you that - but someone who never actually seemed to be willing to GO to that life... I wanted to know what made you tick, what made you that way, what you were running from. And I had to work so hard to get you to give up even little bits of information that it was all a reward. The more mysterious you tried to be-"

"-I wasn't being mysterious!" she protested, cutting him off.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Reclusive, then. The more you hid - Don't deny it Linden- the more rewarding it was to get a new piece to the Linden-Puzzle. Plus, getting half a smile outta you was amazing." He grinned at her narrowed gaze, then offered her something real. "Seriously, though. I dunno... I just... saw something. An animal I recognized, maybe. I wanted to know you. And you treated me like a pain in your ass, but not a loser tweakhead. And you respected me even when you found out. And... I just did, Linden. And I'm glad I did. Cause here we are."

"Here we are." she agreed softly, wrapping her arms around his waist. He wrapped his around her and hugged her tightly to him. "I love you." She murmured softly into his chest. "I'm sorry I was such a bitch back then."

"Got us here, didn't it? And that makes every single time you kicked me outta that car worth it." he stated smugly, and was rewarded when her body shook with laughter, again.

They locked up together, and then spent the next hour celebrating her gratitude for him. She slept like a baby, wrapped in his arms, that night.