As I step out into the hallway, I hear the silence. It's deafening. I was expecting some tears, some screams of grief, someone playing mariachi music – you know, something. As I look in the living room, I find it empty. Damn, the Titans didn't even get a chance to recoup before the city needed them again. Looks like I had the place to myself. Probably thrown a party if the people I wanted to party with weren't out on patrol.

Looking down, I realize my treads were trashed. Need to change these things and now. I head down the hall to where my old room was. Been three months, but there might be some old uniforms left in my room. I get a few feet down the hall before I come to a stop. Hell, that's new…

My eyes are drawn to the case sitting in the hallway. Missed it the last time I was here. Too concerned about the blob of snot in my chest that passed for my heart to take in this little addition. Inside the case is one of my old Doom Patrol uniforms. A plaque sat beneath it bearing my mug. Leaning in, I take in the words printed on the metal:

This case stands in honor of Garfield Logan – a.k.a. Beast Boy – of the Teen Titans. A man who sacrificed everything to save his friends, and who gave all of himself in order to bring truth, justice, and –

I stifle a laugh as I catch the final line of the eulogy:

-the last slice of pizza to those he treasured as his friends. He will remain in our hearts…forever.

Nice, Rob. Little mushy, but it's all good. Can't be badass all the time – just most of the time. Wonder what they'll think of me now…

SHH! What was that? What, who the hell am I shushing? Never mind – I can hear the pulleys in the elevator straining as the cab moved it's way up the shaft. Could be the Titans. Then again, nothing recently had been going my way, so I doubt that. Hmm, looks like it's time to break this newly-rebuilt body in. Come get some, motherfuckers…

DING.

The elevator doors opened slowly. Cautiously, the occupants exited the confines, all of them on edge and ready for anything. Most of them were up and coming kids just out of the Academy and on their first mission for the H.I.V.E. One, however, was ready for anything. He was Private H.I.V.E. – one of the most decorated villains ever to grace the villain's training academy. If anyone could accomplish this mission, it would be him…

Well, well, well, if it isn't Private Fucknuts. Mind's still a little muddied, but I recall that he had a spot on the H.I.V.E. Five as well. Kinda glad I'm still around. Time to put the Five to rest for good. Motherfuckers step in here, they get beat down. Gonna wish they hadn't messed with me and mine. This is my house, and I make the rules…well, as long as no one else is around. Crouching down in the doorway of my old room, I listen in to the conversation…

"Okay, team," Private H.I.V.E. said briskly, "The Brain wants Logan's body – no ifs, and or butts. Start tearing this place apart. I'm heading to the medical wing. If he's here, he's ours. Understood?"

"YES SIR!" the four young villains said in unison.

Well, that brings back memories – bad ones. Another group of tools trained to do someone else's bidding. Not me – not anymore. I'm solo now. I wouldn't do what Mento wanted, so he tried to make me do it. All he got for his efforts was dead. Guess what? These fucks wouldn't get a chance to celebrate their graduation. Game on.

One of the young villains made his way down the hallway. Hell of a way to start his career with the H.I.V.E. – first mission into the belly of the beast, the headquarters of the greatest hero team the city had ever seen.

Suddenly, he came to a stop. He had found his way to the trophy case. Reading the inscription, he let out a laugh.

"Beast Boy," he said. "Must have been a faggot…" Then he took a closer look. The case was ajar – almost as if whatever had been inside had already been taken. "Wonder what this thing was?"

He didn't know it, but this rookie had just asked his last question.

He doesn't even see it coming. I step out of the doorway. With a swift motion, I kick the little fucker in the back as I open the case back up. His head goes inside. I close the front of the case on his neck and pull back on his shoulder. CRACK! Head's no longer connected to the spine bone. Pulling the case back open, I drag the rookie back into the room and drop him on the floor like a sack of bricks. No need to molly-coddle his ass at this point. Who's the faggot now, Bobblehead Fred? I grimace as I get back up. Leave it to the guys to take the smallest outfit they could find and put it in the case. Then again, they probably weren't expecting its' old owner to come looking for it…

I step back out of the room. I see another one – a girl – searching Robin's room. Don't know what the H.I.V.E. wants, but I know what it's gonna get: Pain – and a lot of it.

The girl lets out a cry of pain as I drive a forearm into the back of her neck. Her back arches up in agony. My arms are around her neck. Like snapping a twig…Nah. Call me old-fashioned, but boys and girls should play nice. I apply enough pressure to send her off to Never-Neverland for a while. Stepping back out, I get a good view of the other two. One's pulling up the cushions on the couch, other's checking the fridge. Gotta be green. Or hungry. Or looking for change. Fuck it – no skin off my nose. Just makes it that much easier to finish the job…

The masked villain rummaged through the stocked refrigerator of the Titan headquarters. Didn't get a chance to hit the mess hall before the Private got them ready for action. Hmm, a liverwurst sandwich would surely hit the spot…

The young kid was too engrossed to see Logan charge out from out of the hallway and leap over the counter. He did notice, however, when the Titan twisted his head sharply to the left. Dying on an empty stomach…well, that has to suck…

Yup. Definitely green. All these kids come out of the H.I.V.E. thinking they got eyes in the back of their fuckin head. Truth is most of them don't notice the forest for the trees until they start falling. Eventually, they do realize their fate – and it's always too late. Cushion Boy is still digging for pennies. Probably hankering for a $.89 Gordita. I'm hankering for a hunk of his ass…and not in that way…

This one's got some sense. He looks up as I clear the couch. Not enough sense, though, as my legs wrap around his head. Twist. Snap. Done. Logan 4, H.I.V.E. 0. Looking for a shutout. Come on Privates – I'm waiting…

Private H.I.V.E. shuddered as he glanced around the medical ward. Blood still stained the table and the floor where the operation had taken place. Even worse, the smell of burnt flesh lingered in the air. A wave of nausea hit him as he saw the flaked skin lying on the floor. No one could have survived what happened to Beast Boy on the H.I.V.E. roof, but his body was gone. No way could they have buried him so quickly…

Swallowing hard, the villain realized he would have to go back to the Brain empty-handed – not a good thing to say the least.

H.I.V.E.'s feet shuffled on the floor as he headed back down the hallway. Failing a mission – not a good way to impress the new headmaster…or his hired hand. Still, at least the Titans were out of the way. Word was spreading fast of the Teen Titans' capture and their subsequent defeat of their Steel City teammates. Looks like Jump City was fair game to whoever wanted to take it. Things were about to get interesting to say the least.

"Alright team, assemble and let's roll!" the villain said as he reentered the living room. He was greeted with silence. Looking around, he realized he was standing alone in the tower. "Team? Let's go!" he said, his voice echoing in the room.

Suddenly, a voice projected itself from behind him. It was one he never expected to hear again:

"No use, Fucknuts. They can't hear you now…well, maybe that one girl, but she's sure in no shape to help your sorry ass."

Private H.I.V.E. spun around so quickly his head nearly did a 360. His eyes threatened to leave his skull like an F-18 off a naval carrier. If he had been a little bit older, he probably would have dropped dead on the floor.

"B-B-B-Beast Boy!" he stammered, falling back onto the floor.

"Well, if it isn't Forrest Gump," Logan said, smirking with his arms crossed over his chest. "I think you and I need to have a t-t-t-talk!"

As the Titan's hands gripped his uniform, the villain knew his day was not going to end well.

"So, you wanna tell me why the fuck you and your merry band of anal-dwelling butt monkeys are snooping around the Tower?" Logan asked. His right arm bulged underneath his uniform. Understandable – it takes a lot of control to hold a 200-lb sack of villainous shit over the edge of a letter-shaped skyscraper. Private H.I.V.E. swung by his left leg perilously over a death drop. Still, his attitude remained intact for the moment.

"What's it to you, Dead Man?" he asked, sarcastically.

"Because I gots to know," the Titan said, grimacing. Slapping his arm with his free hand, he grinned. "Better talk fast. Remember, Privates – this is my weak arm."

Despite the show of defiance, the villain's face began melting into a mask of fear. "Dude, you're…you're fuckin' crazy!"

"Heh, maybe I am," Logan said, smirking. "But in case you haven't noticed, this fuckin' crazy man is the only thing standing between you and terminal velocity – and having experienced it firsthand, I can tell you it sucks balls. Now, you wanna spill it, or should I spill you?"

Private H.I.V.E. was silent for a moment. Then he let out a girlish shriek as Logan let his leg slide a little in his grasp.

"Mother – tick fucking – tock," the Titan said.

"SHIT! SHIT! Alright!" the villain said, holding his hands out in surrender. "Look, I was sent here to find your body for the Brain!"

What the fuck…

"The BRAIN?!" Logan said, stunned. "What the hell's he want with me?"

"Probably to stuff you and display you in his den," the villain said, a tinge of panic in his voice. "What the fuck do I know?!"

Logan stood for a second, his mind deep in thought. "Okay, I'll buy that," he said, finally. "Not smart enough for the Brain to tell you what he's doing. Now, what about the Titans?"

H.I.V.E. grinned. "Sorry, can't help you there," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

The Titan returned the grin. "Well, can't always get what you want…" he mused.

"Yeah," the villain said, nodding. "So, are we cool?"

"Just one last question," Logan said, quietly.

"Shoot."

The grin on Logan's face became a mask of evil. "Can you fly, H.I.V.E.Y?"

The young villain's jaw went slack. "Wait," he said, quickly. "No…No…NOOO!"

As my hand opened up, Privates shit himself. Nice way to die – broken on the rocks with a pant-full of butt cheese. Probably the least of his worries as of the moment – emphasis on moment. Don't even need to see him hit the rocks below. Like I said, you can't always get what you want…but, sometimes, you get what you need – or jolly well fuckin' deserve. H.I.V.E. Five's done for good. Off to the big porta-potty in the sky. As for the Titans…well, I am sitting on the most technologically advanced marvel in the entire city. Might wanna try tracking them down. Gee, what an idea. Surprised I got that one on the first try. Anyway, the city's going through a major shitstorm and only I got an umbrella. Time to get back in the game…