(Major spoilers for Eye of the Beholder) I got another Therapy scene to go by! And It's what I hoped it to be. I knew she was going to get all fired up and spout things off, so that was great to finally see her back in there, and so comfortable I might add.

If you haven't already, go back to chapter 4 because I added some things to the end. Anyway! Here is my take on the scene we saw and things following.

When does it stop being enough?

"So did Castle go out with her again?" The psychiatrist asks when Kate lets herself into his office the next morning before her shift.

"No." She says with a huge smile she hasn't been able to hide since yesterday. She kicks off her shoes in front of her chair and takes a seat, still smiling.

"You seem very happy about that." He watches her with a small smile.

"Well of course I am." She leans back in her chair very relaxed, legs up and steady on the cushion. She's beyond relieved that Castle didn't go out with Serena. The entire case she felt sick to her stomach and in panic mode. Her emotions were all over the place. But there was really nothing she could do about it, and she had a very hard time not showing how envious she was. She swears she thought she was going to cry when she found the two kissing it the hallway. But she brought that on herself when she told Castle to bring her on a date. Stupid stupid... She thought then, and still thinks now. But she's glad it's over.

He regards her for several moments to the point were she's now becoming nervous. She looks down at the coffee cup she's holding, playing with the lid, and bites her lip. "That doesn't seem complicated." He remarks.

She frowns and looks up at him. "You know it is." She knows that the thought of Caste being with other women bothers her, to the extreme, and yet she still cannot bring herself to just go there with him.

He actually sighs at this. As if everything is going in circles and she just wont stop and find a medium. "Lets backtrack." He then says. "To why Serena bothered you so much." He gives her a chance to go there in her mind, and sees it play on her face.

"What? Do you want me to tell you that the thought of Castle being with other women makes me sick? That I am selfish and don't want him to be with anyone else?" She frowns deeply. "I don't have the right to tell him who he can be with."

"Do you think your being selfish?" He asks.

She opens and closes her mouth, but doesn't answer. Instead she purses her lips and looks away and out the large windows.

"All right." He takes her inability to answer as a yes, and that she's ashamed. So he decides to moves on. "Yesterday you said 'He's supposed to be...' and you then stopped yourself. What did you really want to say?"

"You know." She tells him resting her coffee on one knee and bringing a hand to her mouth.

"I do. But you've never actually said it out loud, you avoid ever expressing what it is your truly feeling, and I think you need to."

She sighs heavily, tears leaping to her eyes. "He's...he's supposed to..." Be with me... Her eyes go back to her coffee cup where a small drop of coffee struggles with it's hold on the lid. Be in love with me. "He's supposed to ...love...me." She finds it challenging to express this.

His face softens. "And you're scared." She nods "That he wont wait for you."

"Or that he will? What's that supposed to mean anyway?" She asks, going on the defensive.

"You tell me." He says coolly.

She suppresses the need to glare at him, holding her cup in both hands now, feeling the warmth radiate off it and onto her skin. It's almost too hot but she doesn't want to let go. She's afraid to tell him. Afraid of sounding completely absurd and selfish. She purses her lips, bringing her cup to rest on them and shakes her head.

"You can't hide forever." He tells her, and she gets this sinking feeling in her chest. "Your hiding things from me, if you want to be ready, as you say, then I need to know everything." She gets it. "So we can get you through this."

Whatever this is. She nods at him, "I'm letting it go to waste..." She says, through glassy green eyes, dark with emotion. Tears start to stream down her face, and her coffee cup shakes a little in her hand so she clutches it with both hands again. Closing her eyes she tries to reel herself back in, but it's proving to be difficult. Her head and her heart are fighting again. She feels as though she's stuck in reverse, and she doesn't know how else to handle it other than to just stop all together. She doesn't know how to move forward.

"What is?" He asks gently.

"My...Feelings for Castle." She emphasizes on the word "Feelings" still not able to say that four letter word.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because...because I lost something I can't replace...and … when my mother was killed, something inside me changed, I don't know what it is, but I can't get it back. And I've thought about all possible things to help, or at least be good enough to fill the hole whatever it is has left...But I just... Nothing is ever enough."

"What about Castle?"

"I want him to be enough, I truly do, But..I need to fix..myself...first. I need to be ready before I dive in. I want to be ready...But I don't want to hurt like that again..."

"What makes you think he'll hurt you?"

"I don't know." She says honestly. "There is always that possibility...and I am afraid to chance it." She sniffles, wiping at her eyes with one hand. "But." She starts. But if I never try I'll never know.

The Psychiatrist waits her out, seeing a real struggle in her. One that he knows she needs to go through. She has a lot inside her that has gone unsaid for so long, he understands that baby steps are the only way to get her to reveal them all. Maybe even less than baby steps, miniscule strides to fixing herself. A self that has been broken and unattended for years.

"But I know that he has helped. From the moment I met him...he's been guiding me to a place...closer to myself then I have ever been. And even though I am not ready to go there right now...I just.. I am too attached to him, to let him go..."

"And you feel selfish for making him wait." He states.

"Exactly." She sounds utterly ashamed of herself. And she refuses to meet his gaze. She pauses, thinking back to when she thought Castle might have spent the night with Serena. How torn up she was and didn't know how she'd handle it if he did sleep with that woman. She's still afraid he wont wait forever. That maybe he'll find someone better than her, who will dive in with him and not make him wait for her to pull herself together..

"He pretty much asked me if he should wait." She says.

"Oh?"

"Yea..I told him it's obvious she really likes him..."

"And."

"He asked me if I thought he should peruse it."

"What did you tell him?"

Kate opens and closes her mouth. "I said 'suit yourself." She sighs at her own stubbornness.

He seems annoyed with her as well, if he's allowed to be, and leans his head into the palm of his hand. "What did you want to say?"

"I very well couldn't have said. No castle your supposed to be with me." She snorts at her absurdity.

"Why not?" He asks amused.

"You know why not." She says stopping an eye roll.

She takes a sip of her coffee, now going cold, finding her mouth has gone dry, She ponders in the silence he allows her. Castle has been around for nearly 4 years. He has plenty of material for several books and more. She's not an idiot. But she knows that this whole shadowing thing has become more then just research. She knows it has for her. He's her partner now. And she thinks she has been aware of this even before he said he loves her. For all they have been through, together, that's proof enough that he's not going anywhere...

Kate sighs. "I know he'll wait for me...But I am worried about what that will do to him."

"What do you mean?"

"That maybe...if I take too long, he'll see I'm not worth it, that waiting around for me is a waste of his time." Even as she says it she realizes it's a stupid fear. But she can't help it. She knows he's been around this long, why would he go now?

"He's waited around all this time."

I don't deserve him "Yes...but..now I have given him hope. It's selfish of me to dangle that in front of him and then not follow through. I'm terrified that the hope I gave him will run out...and he won't think it's enough anymore. For now maybe...but when does it stop being enough?"

I sat here for several hours on this. Worked on it, got up walked around, sat back down worked on it some more...pondered what to say, what not to say. So I just put it all out there. But I so badly want to know why it's so complicated. When she said "You know why it's complicated." and then he said "Only what you've told me." I want to KNOW what she's told him! It's bugging me to know end!

On another note: Next episode looks fun and flirty, but it's the one after that I am most interested in. I wont spoil it, but if your a spoiler junky go look it up on youtube, because there are more promotional photos for 4x07 then there are for next weeks. (for now anyway.)

Bravo to those who thought I was listening to "fix you" by coldplay while writing this, cus I was. Go look up the Boyce Avenue ft Tyler Ward version! So good and deep!

As always reviews are my favorite!

Oh and I have gotten almost 100 story alerts/favorites out of this. So THANK YOU! I do my best. :P

P.S. I keep thinking of things...Is it just me, or does Kate seem...very dependent on her therapist? I mean, yea she's going to him and stuff, but hopefully you know what I mean?