Chapter 7 - When Realisation Sets In

March 8 1917

Tommy gripped onto the wooden walking stick as he attempted to get up from the bed which had felt like his prison for the last week. The doctor stood over him, watching his moves intently and trying to ascertain how his recovery was coming on. The shrapnel injuries in his legs were healing up nicely but they had taken its toll on Tommy's ability to walk.

"Ok, now I'd like to see you walk to the other end of the room and back." The doctor instructed.

Thomas nodded and started to take tentative steps across the tiled floor, wincing slightly as the pain ripped through him at the unwanted pressure which raised up through his legs. Getting to the other end of the room, he turned and began his walk back to the waiting doctor.

"I thought I was going to be out of here in a couple of days." He groaned as he reached his bed, allowing himself to drop down onto it.

"The sooner you can walk without those sticks, the sooner you'll get out of here." The doctor advised.

Standing in the shadows at the nearby door, stood Emily. Over the last few days, she had found herself wandering up to the higher floor to see how Thomas was doing. On most occasions, he was out cold with the medication his doctor had him on. She hadn't found the courage to venture into his room whilst he was awake since the first night she had found him there, choosing to steal fleeting glances at him whenever she did get a chance. Seeing him finally out of bed filled her with hope and as she watched him intently, her eyes cascaded over his strong form which up until, had always remained hidden. But now, she could see the outline of his shoulder blades and stomach through the white cotton shirt he wore and in his bed shorts, she could also see muscular definition in his calves and thighs. His hair had slightly grown out from when she had first met him in Birmingham, but he was still the same handsome man.

"I need a drink." Thomas complained as he lay back in the bed.

"Ah, nurse!"

Emily was pulled from her daydream as the doctors strict voice sounded across the large room. Startled, she glanced down at Tommy who thankfully, wasn't paying her much attention.

"Yes doctor?" she asked from the doorway, not daring to venture inside.

"Can you bring a pitcher of water and a glass please." He asked, turning around to face Tommy and therefore blocking her view of him.

Nodding, she turned and made her way along the corridor, her heart pounding. She could only hope the doctor would still be there by the time she came back. She wasn't sure if she was ready to meet him properly yet. The anticipation was almost too much for her to deal with and she couldn't decide whether she wanted to put an end to their correspondence. Reaching the sink, she pulled a large jug down from the shelf and filled it up. Lifting a glass, she placed both on a tray and made her way back along to his room. Taking a deep breath, she stepped through the door and almost felt relieved as she noticed he was in bed and his eyes were closed. Taking a few quiet steps and trying desperately to stop the tray from rattling within her shaking hands, she ventured inside, placing the tray down on his bedside unit. She stole one final glance at him before she rushed back towards the door.

"You don't have much bedside manner."

Emily stopped suddenly as the voice startled her. "I thought you were asleep. I didn't want to disturb you." She answered without turning around.

"Would you mind pouring a glass of that out for me?" he asked, wincing in pain as he tried to turn in his bed.

Taking a deep breath, Emily turned and began making her way over to him, keeping her head down. He didn't lift his head as she approached and focused on fixing the sheets which had wrapped up around his legs in a rather uncomfortable fashion. Emily poured out the glass of water and handed it to him, trying to ignore her slightly shaking hands.

"Thank you." He took the glass from her and took a quick drink, thankful for the relief it had given to his dry mouth. Taking another drink and finishing its contents, he handed her the glass, only then allowing himself to catch a glance at her. "Hey, I know you."

She looked down at him, finally allowing their eyes to meet. Feigning surprise, she allowed a small smile to appear on her face.

"Nice to see you again."

"What are you doing here?" he asked, looking somewhat excited to see her.

She questioned whether to admit she was the one behind the letters he had been receiving, her eyes glancing over to the opened envelope which bore her handwriting on the nearby table. "I was stationed here some time ago." She answered, keeping it vague.

"You know, you never did tell me your name." he smiled up at her.

Pausing, she thought for a second. She wasn't sure what to do. Taking a breath, she took a step towards him. "My name is Emily."

She watched him intently as his brow furrowed and she could tell he was thinking intently. Nothing was said for a few seconds and Emily felt slightly uncomfortable as his eyes studied her carefully. Before anything else could be said between them, Emily was almost knocked off her feet as the entire building shook around her. A massive explosion rang out and her eyes widened as she grasped onto the edge of Tommy's bed. As the movement of the building came to an end, Emily pushed herself back upright.

"What was that?" she gasped, trying to catch her breath. She was shaking, almost violently at the impact.

Tommy was sitting up in bed, his eyes darting around until they finally landed on Emily. He rested his hand on top of hers trying to relax her. "Are you ok?"

She shuddered at his touch before pulling her hand away. "Yes. I think so. I should go and find out what's going on."

Trying not to look at him again, she made her way towards the doorway and looked up and down to corridor. Several screams were ringing out around her and she could tell instantly that whatever had happened, had devastating consequences. Darting towards the staircase, Emily rushed downstairs, almost immediately coming face to face with Alice.

"Emily! Thank god you're ok."

"What's happened?"

Alice grasped her arm and pulled her down the corridor. "We've been hit by an enemy airstrike. Luckily it hit the outskirts of the building but the bottom wing is badly damaged. The last wards down here are the worst hit. We'll have lost people Emily. I need you to prepare for that. We need to start getting people out. They're already working to put the fires out. Can you start in here, and move all the patients as far away from here as possible." Alice stopped them outside the ward and indicated to the clearly frightened patients inside. Nodding, Emily made her way inside to do what she could.

April 8 1917

The world was gunning for Germany. In recent days, several countries had declared war on them indicating a clear escalation in tensions across the world. Thomas had patiently waited for this day and now he was finally fit for getting back to the front. An aim of spending just a week in hospital turned out to be a pipe dream and resulted in a month long stay. He thought back to his encounter with the young woman he had met back in Birmingham. He couldn't quite believe how small a world it had been and how they had been brought back together. Lifting together all of his belongings, he placed them into his rucksack. Opening the drawer, he was drawn to the pile of letters which sat inside. Flicking through them, he recognised the ones he had received from his brothers and his Aunt and finally he came to the last letter he had received from Emily. He hadn't written back to her since realising she was stationed at the same hospital. He didn't need to. Despite the fact they hadn't admitted it to each other, he knew the Emily from Birmingham and his penpal saviour were the same woman. Having made a few subtle enquiries, he learnt that she was indeed the only nurse named Emily who worked in that particular hospital. He gathered that she was also aware of this fact, given how uncomfortable she appeared to be around him. Whilst he was glad to get back to his battalion, he felt somewhat sad that he may not see her again for sometime. He found himself hoping that she would be around before he left. He knew there were several soldiers being discharged that day and he knew he would have to wait for them all before he would be taken back. Buttoning up his uniform jacket and placing his cap on his head, Thomas threw his rucksack over his shoulder and made his way out of the door. He glanced up and down the corridor but he seen no sign of her. Disappointed, he made his way towards the staircase.

Xxxxxx

Tossing and turning, Emily opened her eyes. Glancing over at the clock, she realised it was almost three in the afternoon. Rolling onto her back, she sighed as she admitted defeat that she would finally need to get up. She wasn't used to having to try and sleep until the afternoon but she had agreed with Alice that she would cover the night shift this week. Getting up, she made her way to her cupboard and pulled out her uniform before finally making her way across to the hospital.

As she arrived, she was greeted by several doctors crowded in a circle with Alice standing nearby. "What's happening?" she whispered.

Alice turned to her. "We've got a fair amount going on. We've got several soldiers going back to the front, but we've also had another high number of patients arriving. I need you urgently to go upstairs and start dealing with some of the minor injuries."

Emily nodded and pulled her coat off, hanging it up as she went. Pulling on her apron and adjusting her hat, she made her way up the staircase to the top floor. Her heart starting pounding as she opened the door into the corridor, her eyes immediately falling on the ward door directly across from her. She had been avoiding Thomas, she couldn't deny it, but now she was here again. Taking a breath, she took a few steps towards the doorway, ready to greet him. However, as she reached the door, her heart sank at the sight of the freshly made bed. It was empty, and his name was scrubbed from the board on the wall. He was gone. Her head dropping down towards the floor, she tried to force the tears which threatened to fall from her eyes. Determined not to allow it to get to her, she wiped her eyes of any wet residue and forced herself to get on with her rounds.

April 13 1917

She woke up suddenly by sitting bolt upright in bed. Sweat poured from her forehead and she felt he nightdress stick to her back. She tried to force the images from her mind, but the last few days at the hospital had proven to be almost too much for her. The sight of the men who had recently been admitted were harrowing and in all her years of working in hospitals in London, she had never seen anything like this. Blisters were formed on their faces and bodies, some had gone blind and they were fighting for breath. The last few days were haunting her and she had struggling to sleep ever since. Placing her head in her hands, she took a deep breath and tried to gather her thoughts. Getting up, she grabbed a nearby towel and wiped down her brow and the back of her neck. Splashing water on her face, Emily gripped the side of the sink. Glancing up at the nearby mirror, she caught a glimpse of her reflection. Her eyes were heavy and black circles had begun to form underneath. She looked ill but yet, she knew she couldn't give in. She had no idea where Thomas was, and she had been incredibly disappointed at the fact she hadn't had a chance to say goodbye. Moving back to the nearby desk, Emily sat down and switched on the small lamp. Pulling out a few pieces of paper, she decided she had to write to him again. She had been disappointed at the fact that he had never responded to her last letter, and she wondered whether he knew her true identity. Before they had been distracted by the recent attack on the hospital, Tommy had looked at her curiously, and this had made her believe he may knew who she was. Putting pen to paper, she began writing.

"Dearest Thomas,

I hope this letter finds you well. I realise you haven't responded to my last letter and I wasn't sure if there was a particular reason for this.

I should be honest with you, although, I am not sure if you perhaps already know the truth. It may have dawned on you that we have already met. Once upon a time in Birmingham and then again, at the hospital. I truly did not know who you were, but I have to admit, I lived for your letters. They kept me going in times of difficulty and I enjoyed reading about your stories.

When I first saw you, I couldn't quite believe it was you. I struggled to push myself to spend any time with you as I wasn't sure how you would react.

I truly hope you have recovered well. I understand if you no longer wish for me to contact you. If I don't hear from you, I will assume this is the case. I wish you all the best.

All my love,

Emily."

April 27 1917

He knew it. As he read over her most recent letter, he knew deep down that she was the very same woman. He had questioned himself over and over again whilst he had been cooped up in the hospital and now re-reading her letter, it was clear to him that she had realised it as well. He wondered how long she had known for. How long had she spent wandering in and out of his ward knowing exactly who he was. Why had she never mentioned it? Why had she never spoken to him, other than in a professional context? From her letter, it was clear she was anxious about admitting who she was and unsure of his reaction. But now, back in the barracks, he wasn't sure when he would get the chance to see her again. But what he did know, was he wasn't about to keep her waiting any longer. Pulling out a piece of paper and pen, he began writing.

"My Dearest Emily,

I apologise for my delay in responding to you. Please rest assure, there was no malice behind this.

I'll admit, I didn't realise at first who you were but now that I do, I am determined I will come back from this war and find you. I know it is a lot to ask of you, but I hope that you will wait for me. You have been the only consistent factor in my life over the last few months and have done so much to keep me sane and focused.

I am back in the trenches for now, but it is likely I will be heading underground in the next week or so, and therefore, I will apologise in advance for the potential delay of any future response. Please do not worry in this case. The air is thick with bombs and grenades and when they go off, it feels as though five earthquakes are going off at once. I don't know how much easier I will find it to be in the tunnels instead.

I hope all is as well as it can be at the moment in the hospital. I have recently written to my two brothers to find out how they are getting on. It has been so long since I seen them and I hope they are well. I haven't heard anything to the contrary from my Aunt Polly.

I will leave it at that. I hope to hear from you soon.

All my love,

Tommy."