Hey guys! I'm so sorry about the long wait but I haven't had access to a computer because I was in India and didn't bring my laptop and anyway my laptop has been broken so before that I didn't have it either and I only just realized you can update on your phone. I've been writing on my phone using the google docs app I just didn't realize you could update so yeah I'm really is the chapter where you start to see Sapphire transitioning from a mostly happy, joking kid, to the person you see in The Romance of Jadason. So enjoy! :)

2004

(SAPPHIRE POV)

"Sapphire . . . promise me you're not going to go do something crazy right after I tell you this." Coulson said.

"Depends." I replied.

"I'm serious." he said.

"Okay. I promise." I agreed.

"We have a lead on Skye." he said. "We found a foster home she's staying at."

"What?! Where?" I demanded, basically jumping in excitement and joy and anxiety. James gave me a strange look.

"You're going to break the phone yelling into it like that." He said, smiling.

"I sent you the coordinates." Phil said.

"Thank you so much. Really. You have no idea how much this means to me." I said.

"I have a bit of an idea. But don't get your hopes up too high. We're not sure if she's there or if she ever was. It could've been another girl her age by the name of Skye. Don't be too disappointed." he said.

"I understand. Thanks again." I said.

"No problem. Bye."

"Bye."

"So you have the coordinates?" James asked.

"Yeah. I'm going to leave now." I said.

"I'm coming." he added.

"You don't have to." I told him.

"But I want to." he replied.

I shrugged. "Let's go then."

We got on a plane and set the coordinates. It's in New York, so a relatively short flight. We were silent most of the time until he noticed me fidgeting slightly.

"What's up?" he asked.

"What if she doesn't remember me?" I asked. "What if she's hurt or-"

"Sapphire. It's all going to be fine, okay? Even if she doesn't remember you, it can't be worse than not knowing where she is. At least she's alive." he said.

I winced. "I know. I just worry. Who knows what's happened to her? She'll probably hate me for abandoning her." I said, looking at him.

"You didn't abandon her. You were kidnapped. That's hardly the same thing." he told me quietly.

"But I still left her on her own." I argued, not looking at him. He tilted my chin up slightly so I had to look at him.

"You didn't abandon her. Even if that's what she thinks now, that's not what she'll think once she understands the situation. I promise, it'll all work out in the end." he said. I smiled slightly and kissed him briefly.

"I'm going to go in. I'll let you know if I need you to come out." I said.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come?" he asked.

"Yeah. It'll be fine." I said. He nodded.

"Be careful." he told me. I smirked.

"When am I not?" I asked. He rolled his eyes.

"Is that even a question?" I laughed and left, concealing my gun and knives in my suit. I knocked on the door, assessing the surroundings.

It was a medium sized house, a typical suburban neighborhood. It had a green grassy front lawn and the sprinkler systems were running.

A teenage girl opened the door, and I have no doubt that it's Skye. She has my hair, my eyes, she's basically the younger version of me. Now that I'm here, in front of her, I can't speak or hug her or do anything if the kind. I just want to hold on to her and never ever let go.

"Hello. Agent X from SHIELD. Can I please speak to your guardian?" I asked professionally, trying to keep my cool.

"Um, yeah." she replied. "Come in." she said. I walked inside and she shut the door behind me. I stood in the entryway as she knocked timidly on a door to the den and opened it.

"Mary-Sue. How many times have I told you not to interrupt me? You're going to-"

"We have a guest." she cut him off, but I saw the scared look in her eyes.

I also noticed a small bruise peeking out from under her shirt that she tried to cover up, but failed. I saw a scar on her lip. My internal alarms were blaring.

"Nice to meet you. I'm agent X of SHIELD. Can I speak with you for a moment." I asked, for now suppressing my anger. I searched through his memories, and was furious at what I saw.

He had- oh god I'm going to be sick. "No." he snapped. "Get out of my house."

"Sir, this is government business. She's going to be coming with us." I said, my voice taking on an edge. He gripped Skye's arm tightly, and she winced. That's sure to leave a bruise.

"I don't care about your government crap. Get out. Now." he said.

"I'm going to warn you once more. Let her come with me or I'll take her forcefully. I have evidence that this is no longer a safe place for her to be."

Suddenly he had a gun aimed at me. I flipped it out of his grasp and aimed it at him along with my own. In an attempt to get the gun back he released Skye.

"Go. There's a plane outside. Just trust me." I told her, fighting him.

She nodded and ran, and as she ran I noticed a bite mark on her shoulder, from her loose T Shirt slipping down, and my vision turned red.

I went crazy on the guy. I snapped many of his bones and glared at him.

"You terrible person. I'm going to kill you. Slowly and painfully." I said.

"That makes you just as bad- as- as me." he said, struggling as I choked him.

My grip faltered and my aim wavered. He used that opportunity to get up and punch me hard. But I feel numb and I could hardly feel it. I'm like him. I'm like this guy and I'm just as bad of a person as Samuel is.

He compared me to him. He did those terrible things to Skye- but I've done terrible things to her to. I abandoned her. Just as he was about to shoot me, a bullet hit straight through the chest. His eyes rolled back and he slumped back.

"What happened?" I could hear someone asking me. "Come on Blue. Can you hear me?" I heard the same person asking me. James. That's James.

But I can't respond. I feel numb and drained, like everything just drained out of me.

I could hear him asking me things, but I don't know what he's asking. After a bit of this, I could feel him pick me up and take me back to the plane.

I saw Skye running away out of the corner of my eyes and I couldn't do it anymore. She doesn't trust me. Of course she doesn't, she doesn't know me, doesn't remember me. She's hurt and scarred and I probably made things worse by almost killing that guy.

He was right. I am just as bad as him.

I could feel James put me down in my seat, but I still can't say anything, can't do anything, can't feel anything.

I could hear him trying to talk to me, to get me to talk, but his efforts are futile. Even if I could respond, I wouldn't know how to tell him that I'm a terrible person and that he should get far far away from me.

I could see the plane landing and I could feel myself walking back to my room, and I know that James was with me the whole time, but I still feel numb.

My thoughts are spiraling in my head out of control, and I can't breathe. I feel like I'm suffocating on my own failure.

And then the dam broke. I started crying uncontrollably, trying to stop but failing. Failing. Just like I failed at everything else. I'm a failure.

James pulled me in close and I cried into his chest, wanting to just curl up and die. There's no reason I'm here. There's no reason I should be here.

"You're going to be okay Sapphire. It's going to be fine. We'll find her." he said.

"No." I protested, my voice hoarse from crying. He looked at me shocked. "No. She deserves better than me. I've failed her so many times. I was ready to kill that man for what he did to her. I'm no better than he is. She ran because she was scared of me James. And she was right to be. I'm not a good person." I said.

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." he said after a moment's silence.

I looked up at him and he stared right back. "You are a good person. You are so much better than he is. He hurt people for no reason. You hurt him because he hurt Skye." he told me.

"I still did it, regardless of why." I murmured. He stroked my hair comfortingly.

"Intentions and motives do matter. It's what sets the good guys apart from the bad guys." he said.

"That's what Nancy used to tell me." I said, crying harder. She had died a few months ago. I attended the funeral and didn't even shed a tear because I couldn't accept that the only person I've ever viewed as a mother figure was dead. But she is dead.

It's all hitting me now. "I promise. It's all going to be fine." he said.

"No it's not. It's never going to be fine. Nancy's dead because of me. Austin's in a wheelchair because of me. Skye ran away because she was scared of me. It's all my fault." I said.

"It's not your fault. None of it was." he said firmly, and the intensity in his voice made me believe him, just a little bit.

"How can you even say that? You know it's not true." I muttered.

"It is. It is true. I know it. You know it. Everyone else knows it. Do you think Nancy would want you to think like that? What about Skye, if she remembered? And Austin, who you could see at any moment? What about Natasha and Mel and Phil and even Nick, all people who would vouch for you. What about Peggy? Or Mariana and Adrian?" he asked. "Everyone cares about you. Everyone knows you're a good person."

I didn't respond, instead just crying my eyes out because I am a bad person and he won't accept it. I scare my own sister for god's sake.

"He hurt her. He touched her." I said, feeling sick.

"We'll find her. I promise." he said.

I dried my eyes and looked at him. "Do I look like I've been crying?" I asked.

"Not really." he said. I smiled slightly.

"You're such a liar." I said.

"Okay. Maybe just a little bit." he admitted.

I shook my head. "I can't believe it. She was so close. So freaking close and I failed." I muttered.

He looked at me. "It's okay. We'll find her." he said.

"Will we though? She's smart. She managed to stay hidden for a long time." I said.

"She wasn't trying to hide from us though." he said.

I looked at him. "If she wasn't then, she definitely is now."

2005

Natasha is making me do something I'm going to regret, I know it. She told me we're playing never have I ever, but instead of chocolate like we usually do, we're using shots. Oh god. I have a high metabolism, so my alcohol tolerance is also high, but Natasha is Russian. When she drinks, she drinks.

I don't know why we can't keep using chocolate. I mean, chocolate is amazing. I'm going to make sure my children one day have chocolate as their first solid food. Chocolate is life. It's my heart and soul. I swear to god, if I could survive on just eating chocolate for the rest of my life, I would. Hell, I would find a way to turn back time so I could start doing that from a younger age.

Although, if I could turn back time, the first thing I would do is keep Skye safe.

"Come on. We're meeting Natasha right about now. Mariana and Adrian are coming this time as well. And so is some new agent. Grant Ward? He's a teenager, Garrett found him." James told me. "Oh, and you might want to wear layers." he said.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because we might play truth or dare later but Natasha, like always, plays differently. If you don't do a truth or dare you have to take off an article of clothing." he said.

"Oh great. She better turn on the AC." I muttered. I threw on a sweater then laughed, because I'm wearing a sweater on shorts. Smart.

"Hmm. AC. That's Phil's title abbreviated. Agent Coulson, AC. I'm going to call him that from now on." I decided.

James just laughed. "Okay. Go for it." he said. We walked down to Natasha's place. She has an apartment outside of the hub, but it's literally just outside the hub. They have a living sector here, a very small one, for people like us that have no life. I'm probably going to move there soon.

"Hey." I said, walking in.

"Hey. We can start now. I cannot wait to see James drunk." Natasha said, grinning.

I smirked. "Me neither."

"Oh please. You're going to be drunk too." she said, smirking.

"Aren't you too young to get drunk?" Someone new asked. Grant was his name. He's tall and on the skinnier side. He looks young, maybe 18? But his eyes look old and slightly haunted. I was tempted to search his brain, but decided against it. I don't want to invade his privacy.

"Nope. This is SHIELD, kid. You're not too young to get drunk either." she said.

"I'm pretty sure I'm the same age as you." Grant replied.

Natasha laughed. "Unless you're 90 years old, we're not the same age." she said.

His jaw dropped. James smirked. "You know, maybe you shouldn't have dropped it on him like that. Maybe eased him into the idea that you're older than all of us, much less 90. Sorry about her. I'm James. That's X." he said, addressing Grant.

"Grant." he introduced, not questioning my name.

"Okay. Enough pleasantries. Let's get started." Natasha said. "X, James, pour yourselves shots."

We did and then I turned to Phil. "AC, you start." I said.

"AC?" he asked.

"Agent Coulson, AC." I explained.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Don't call me that." he said.

I just smiled. "Okay. Never have I ever shot more than 20 people at once." he said. I took a shot, and Natasha took a shot. Nobody else.

"Never have I ever had a little sister." May said, as she was next. James and I both took shots.

James was next. "Never have I ever had multicolored eyes." he said, smirking at me. I took another shot, glaring at him.

"Never have I ever been named James." I said.

"Oh come on! That's not fair!" he said.

"It is too. Now take your shot." I replied. He rolled his eyes and did as told.

"Never have I ever been in a relationship." Natasha said. Everyone but her and Grant took a shot.

Next was Mariana. "Never have I ever been taller than 5'9"." James, Grant, and I all took shots.

"Never have I ever climbed a building with a shot leg." Adrian said. I glared at him and took a shot.

"Never have I ever had blond hair." Grant said. James rolled his eyes and took another shot. Natasha took a shot too. We looked at her and she shrugged.

"It was for a mission." she said.

"You know, I think they're targeting us." James whispered in my ear.

"Oh you think? They want to see us drunk." I said, laughing.

The game continued on for a while and James and I were completely gone by the time it ended.

"Okay. Time for truth or dare." Natasha said.

(NATASHA POV)

Oh this is great. James and Sapphire are so drunk. "That sounds fun." Sapphire mumbled.

"It will be." I promised. "My house, I start. James, truth or dare?" I asked.

"Truth." he said. Aww, he's still slightly sober. Well we can fix that.

"How often do you and Sapphire spend the night in each other's rooms?" I asked.

"Uh- do I have to answer that?" he asked, too drunk to remember the rules.

"That or take off an article of clothing. Remember, you only have so much on you." I said, snickering.

"Three to four times a week." he said, literally about to pass out. I laughed.

"You two are cute."

"Shut up." Sapphire mumbled, leaning against him.

"Okay. Grant, truth or dare?" James asked.

The kid looked slightly alarmed at being asked this question by a highly intoxicated James, but didn't let it show much. I like this kid. I feel like he's hiding something though. I'll just have to figure it out.

"Um dare." he said.

James grinned. "Okay. Go get that ballerina tutu over there, put it on, go into the hub cafeteria and dance your heart out while singing opera." he said.

"Awww James you're so mean. He's new to this too." Sapphire slurred. "You're eyes are very blue." she said, looking at him strangely, tilting her head.

"Your hair is very brown. And straight. But it's also kind of curly. It's strange." James replied. May laughed.

"I think the word you're looking for is wavy, James." she said.

"WAVY! That's it! Your hair is wavy!" he said excitedly.

"I think these two should stay here. Somebody has to watch them." Phil said.

"How about we all leave them here alone and see what they do." I said nonchalantly. "It'll be so much more entertaining." I said flatly.

"I can't tell if you're serious or not, but I'm hoping not." Adrian said.

"Nah. She's serious." May said, getting up. "Let's do it. They'll probably be going at it by the time we get back."

"And then when we get back, they can sterilize every surface in the room." I said nonchalantly.

"You're crazy." Mariana said.

"Thanks. Let's go." I said. Grant just shook his head.

"Give me another dare, please." he said.

"No can do kid. James just had another drink. He won't respond to questions in just a bit." I said.

He groaned. "Just take off your shirt." May offered.

He tensed slightly at that, but so slightly that nobody else probably noticed it. "Whatever. I'll do it." he muttered, pretending he didn't care.

(LATER)

Oh that was great. I still can't stop laughing. I really hope those two aren't doing the dirty right now, because I just got my carpets cleaned.

We walked in, but instead of seeing them making out or going further, they had both crashed on the floor.

Sapphire looked like she had crashing first, her head resting on his shoulder, and his head is resting on top of hers. They were leaning against the wall, and it's adorable.

I snapped a picture quickly to use as blackmail later. "Well they can stay here the night. Everyone else can go home." I said.

Slowly everyone left except for May, who grinned at me.

"You know what we have to do now, right?" she asked me.

I nodded. "Of course. What do you take me for?"

"Sharpie mustaches?" she asked.

"On sapphire. Sharpie makeup on James." I replied.

"I like the way you think." she said. "Now give me those sharpies."

(MORNING SAPPHIRE POV)

I woke up with a massive headache. I groaned and tried to sit up, only to realize I was asleep next to James. Normally that wouldn't be alarming, except I don't remember going to sleep with him last night, and most certainly not in Natasha's guest room. I moved his arm and sat up, and then felt the strong urge to punch Natasha as I saw his face. He had sharpie makeup all over it, and I'm assuming my face is equally as bad.

I got out of bed and headed towards the bathroom, groaning when I saw my face complete with sharpie mustache and beard.

I walked out of the room frustrated and saw Natasha lounging on the couch, reading a book.

"Oh good, you're awake. You might want to put on some clothes though." she said. I looked down and then glared at her. I'm wearing my underwear. That's it.

"Where are my clothes?" I demanded. "And how come James got to keep his?"

"We were pretty sure you'd kill us if we took off his clothes." she said.

"We?" I asked.

"May and I. We." she said. I groaned again.

"Just give me my clothes back."

"They're in the closet." she said. "Oh, but look at me for a second. I want to admire my handy work."

"Yeah okay. You just want to take pictures." I said, rolling my eyes and walking out.

"We already did." she called as I walked back to the guest room.

"OH MY GOD. What happened to my face?!" James asked, horrified. He glanced at me. "And why aren't you wearing anything?"

"Natasha and May happened." I muttered, going to the closet and grabbing my clothes.