AN: Mornin'
Warnings: If I could please have everyone stand behind this plexi-glass wall I erected over here, that would be fantastic. The shit will be hitting the proverbial fan and I don't want anyone getting messy. The language warning is most definitely in effect, too.
Notes: I'm sorry… but it had to be done.
Additional: I'm going away on vacation soon. I'm not sure how much time I'll have to write/internet access in which to post, so don't be expecting anything until around mid-June after this. Sorry for the delay.
Also: I'm sorry this update is later than I had originally intended it to be. I was called in for an extra shift at work, giving me only one day off this week. I spent the majority of that day cleaning my house instead of doing something productive, like writing this story for you guys.
One More Thing: I didn't camp Guy out as much as I know he can be camped out (Cardboard, your portrayal of him in "Dōseiaisha"has made me laugh more than I could have imagined… "Dramatic Entry" … I nearly sinus enema'd my tea all over my monitor) but I figured this was an extremely serious topic. Guy can be scary-serious when he needs to be. I hope my portrayal of him is at least moderate realistic. This is also where we take a running leap away from in-canon-character-introduction-order. Thanks.
Chapter Seven: In Which There are Insults and Kakashi Couch-Crashes
Kakashi slowed his pace, lowering his book at the flash of green he caught out of the corner of his eye. He was met with a smile bright enough to drop a bird from a tree. "Ah, good morning, Guy." He tucked his book away in its pouch as the other man walked up.
"A glorious day to be alive!" Guy said instead of a greeting, falling into step besides Kakashi.
"It is quite nice out," Kakashi agreed blandly, noting the sunshine and the birdsong. "Did you just return from a mission?"
Guy nodded a few times. "This time it was… a success!" He flashed Kakashi a thumbs-up, although it looked a little awkward since they didn't stop walking, forcing Guy to do it without his signature pose.
Kakashi smiled a little. "The team is coming together then."
"Yes, but even in their failures there is joy because it only means I have yet to teach them everything they will need to know to be the most splendid ninja." Guy clenched a fist in front of his chest, his face intensely sincere. "The day they no longer need me will be a sad one, indeed."
Kakashi resisted the urge to shake his head at his eccentric friend. Guy could find a silver-lining to anything.
"How are your students doing?" Guy continued. "I notice you seem more infused with youthfulness than before. I told you allowing a group to pass would do you some good, my friend." He clapped Kakashi on the shoulder.
"I didn't allow them to pass," Kakashi told him patiently. "They passed on their own. I hadn't realized how much of a handful watching over genin would be, though."
"It gets easier in the second year," Guy encouraged. "They really do stop getting themselves half-killed most of the time."
Kakashi chuckled. It was good to know that he wasn't the only one struggling to keep his students from doing idiotic things during missions. "They're not terrible," he admitted, shoving his hands into his pockets. They fell into a comfortable silence, one that Guy broke shortly.
"So where are you heading this magnificent morning?" The green-clad shinobi glanced around. "I notice that you are lacking your prodigies."
"I'm actually heading out to meet them now," Kakashi explained, then launched into a brief recap of the lost mission scroll. He omitted overhearing Iruka's conversation – that was none of his own business, let alone Guy's. "I was going to take them off on another mission but I've changed my mind. I think a couple days of drills will be a better use of their time at this point."
Guy's eyes flicked up toward the sky. "You make a late start of training, Kakashi," he admonished. "How do you ever expect your students to live up to the ideals of great shinobi if your tardiness is their example?"
Kakashi merely shook his head. He wouldn't have been more than maybe fifteen minutes late if it hadn't been for the missing report. "If you think I'm going to rub off on those kids, you're quite mistaken," he said dryly. "They're very driven."
"Perhaps you would like to put them to a test?" Guy asked, almost too eagerly.
Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eye. "There will be plenty of time to show off our pupils later, Guy," he said firmly. "I really must be getting to their training."
"Oh, but what is a simple competition but additional training of the body and mind? It would prepare them for achieving greater ability through defeat!"
Kakashi's eye narrowed at his friend. "Are you implying that your team would beat mine?"
Guy appeared to ponder that for a moment before stopping in his tracks. He pointed a finger at Kakashi, his other hand on his hip. "That is exactly what I am saying!"
The Copy-Nin did roll his eye that time, not bothering to stop walking. Guy stood awkwardly in his pose for a moment while Kakashi got further away before hurrying to catch up. Neither man deigned to notice the peculiar stares they received from the townsfolk passing by.
"Sometimes you are too hip for even me," Guy announced. Kakashi hoped he wasn't going to start crying again. Guy was terribly over-emotional about little things and Kakashi had had enough of listening to men cry that day. His mind wandered unbidden to the sound of Iruka's sobs, a strange clenching feeling stabbing him in the stomach. He pushed the thoughts away.
"It's not easy being this cool," Kakashi joked back with a light shrug.
"Even so," Guy continued, "I believe a challenge between our teams is long overdue. It will be a most spectacular show of our skills as educators!"
Kakashi gazed at Guy from the corner of his eye. "I'm not dragging my students into your rivalry."
The deflated look on Guy's face was worth the comment, Kakashi decided. "But…" the green-clad man started, "but it is just one more facet of our abilities to mould these impressionable youths into the proud elite. If we don't pit ourselves against one another in that respect, then we will never know who is truly the best."
Kakashi waved a hand dismissively. "I concede then. You're the better ninja."
Guy quirked his immense eyebrows then laughed heartily. "I see, I see. Your students are not yet ready to take on my most spectacular pupils. I understand your unwillingness to lose in an unfair fight. You have called me on it, proving yourself the wiser man." Guy smacked Kakashi on the back again in what Kakashi assumed was supposed to be a companionable gesture. It felt more like a mule had just kicked him but the shorter man managed to not stumble under the force.
They walked quietly for another minute or so before the bridge loomed ahead of them. Kakashi prepared to bid farewell to his peculiar friend but as they approached the river, Guy seemed in no hurry to leave. Kakashi sent him a questioning look, arching his eyebrow.
"I would like to meet these aspiring pupils of yours," Guy explained. "I must gage for myself whether they will shape into worthy opponents for my team."
Kakashi bit back a frustrated sigh. Bringing Guy to meet Team Seven was going to delay them even further in their training. Plus, he had a bad feeling about how Naruto would react to the bizarre jonin. First impressions were often important and that blonde boy was not going to give a very good one. "Meh, whatever," Kakashi murmured, half-shrugging. The lazy front worked and Guy's lip quivered momentarily.
"So… hip…" he whispered, although Kakashi could still hear him.
The wagon crept past while Team Seven stood motionless on the side of the bridge. The handsome man leading the oxen didn't even spare the three junior shinobi a glance as he moved by. Behind the carriage, however, there were more people that did pause to regard them carefully.
The three shinobi appeared to be around the same age as Sakura and the boys, all male with similar features to one another: pale yellow hair, light brown eyes, triangular faces. They looked incredibly familiar to her and Sakura guessed they were probably either brothers or close cousins. They wore their Leaf Village hitai-ate around their foreheads and were gazing at the ones Team Seven wore. Finally, the boy in the middle, the smallest and youngest-looking of the three, grinned and held his hand out toward them.
"Hi!" he greeted good-naturedly.
Thrown off by the friendly greeting, Sakura stared at the strangers. Naruto moved forward, gripping the hand with his own. "Hi," he returned. "Who're you?"
They released hands and the new boy jabbed himself on the chest with this thumb. "Hekai Hibei. This is my team," he continued, pointing to his companions. "Satsui and Gorou Hibei."
Sakura glanced between the boys, realizing suddenly why she had the feeling she'd seen them before. The resemblance between them and Shinji was astounding. Considering they were all from the Hibei family, that wasn't surprising. She snapped out of her inspection when Naruto started talking.
"I'm Naruto Uzumaki," he announced, adjusting his forehead protector. Almost as an afterthought, he pointed at his own teammates. "Sakura Haruno and Sasuke Uchiha."
"Uchiha?" Satsui's eyebrows rose as the three Hibei youths looked at Sasuke. "I thought you guys were all dead," he said bluntly.
The corner of Sasuke's eye twitched and inner-Sakura started to yell profanities at the stranger for speaking so rudely. She held her tongue, though, as Sasuke spoke.
"There are a couple of us left… for now." The dark-haired genin glared at the Hibei boys, almost daring them to ask questions with his dour expression.
Satsui backed off, though, brushing back his flaxen hair with a casual sweep of his hand. He shrugged and started to walk toward the wagon, calling over his shoulder, "Come on. Dad'll have our hides if we delay much longer." The silent Gorou followed without a second urging but Hekai lingered uncertainly. He watched the others get a little further away before leaning toward Team Seven.
"Sorry about my nephews," he muttered. "They're kind of jerks. It's not like we're going very far. We're supposed to wait at the other side of the bridge for our host, anyway."
"Nephews?" Sakura squeaked, staring at him. "But they're not any older than you!"
Hekai smiled lop-sidedly, rubbing the back of his head with a hand in a gesture that reminded her a little bit of Naruto. "Well, actually they're both older than me." He adopted a comical sort of grimace. "I was a, what d'ya call it? An 'oops.' Hey, anyway, I'd better go. See you guys around, eh?"
"O... okay." Sakura barely managed to voice that single word before Hekai had raced off after the rest of his family. The wagon had reached the opposite side of the bridge and sat still, waiting for whoever it was Hekai said would be coming for them. Sakura glanced at her companions to gauge their responses and noticed that Sasuke was leaning back against the bridge wall, looking entirely unconcerned while Naruto was openly glaring at the Uchiha, standing only a few inches away from the other boy.
"Why is it always about you?" the blonde was asking.
"Shut up, dummy," Sasuke growled. He flicked his gaze between his teammates. "And I thought I told you to drop the 'Hibei' thing."
Sakura flinched guiltily but Naruto was unfazed. "I never said I was going to listen to you," he said mulishly. "Besides, it was Sakura's idea to go to the library."
Half of Sakura wanted to run away and hide somewhere dark and quiet under the look that Sasuke gave her. The other half wanted to pummel Naruto for throwing her under the cart to Sasuke. She was mortified of what he would think of her now.
"And it's not like we found anything out," Naruto was continuing. "We still don't know who-"
Sakura suddenly dived on Naruto, clamping a hand over his mouth. Shocked, he knocked forward into Sasuke and the team fell into a heap together on the bridge. The commotion brought a couple curious glances their way from the Hibei wagon.
"What are you two doing?" Sasuke demanded, attempting to shove his way out from under the pileup. Sakura, face red, jerked her head to the far end of the bridge in the same direction the Hibei cart had come from. Kakashi was walking toward them, accompanied by the same ninja they had seen at the tower before the Soto mission.
"There he is!" Naruto exclaimed, surging to his feet. He pointed the distance across the bridge, raising his voice in a yell. "You're the latest ever, Kakashi-sensei!"
Kakashi stopped a few feet away from them, adapting a rather unconcerned air. "There were some problems with some paperwork. I had to spend this morning at the tower and was unable to come any sooner."
"Paperwork problems?" Sakura gained her feet, dusting off her skirt. "That's got to be the lamest excuse you've used yet!"
"It's not an excuse," Kakashi defended, sounding hurt. "I'm quite sincere."
"You're the worst sort of liar," Sakura replied tartly. "Never on time, always making up stories." She ticked off her fingers as she lectured. "Always reading that stupid book."
"She has a point," Sasuke muttered. He had found his spot against the wall again, leaning back on it with his arms crossed. "This is late even for you, Sensei."
"I can assure you, your sensei is telling you the truth," Guy spoke up suddenly. His smile was almost unnervingly wide and Sakura found herself staring. How could teeth be that straight? She wondered how many whitening strips he must have used every day.
Kakashi glanced over at Guy, blinking. "Oh, I had forgotten you were there," he said casually. A vein next to Guy's eye popped slightly and Kakashi motioned toward he genin. "Team Seven," he said by way of introduction. He moved the hand to indicate Guy. "This is Guy-sensei. You will be polite."
Sakura bowed respectfully. She didn't see what the boys did but it must have been acceptable because Kakashi didn't reprimand them.
"What youthful enthusiasm your pupils have for you," Guy spoke, hands on his hips as his dark eyes regarded the trio. "And such affection for one another, enjoying a group hug in a public place is if nothing could stop such devoted camaraderie!" He sighed wistfully and turned his gaze to Kakashi. "I remember those days, don't you?"
Kakashi regarded Guy with a lazy expression. "I honestly have no idea what you're talking about."
"We weren't hugging," Naruto started, glaring in Sasuke's direction but he was pointedly ignored by the other boy. The adults had launched into a hushed conversation and Sakura thought she caught the words "cool," "stylish," and "youthful exuberance" uttered multiple times by Guy. Naruto opened his mouth to speak again but found himself cut off by a noise from the far end of the bridge.
The genin all turned to look while the sensei held their quiet dispute. Someone was getting out of the carriage and, from the looks of it, she was arguing quite forcefully with the man Sakura was positive was Shinji. The junior shinobi couldn't make out the words, but Sakura was surprised when Shinji jabbed his finger in their direction. The woman reached for his arm but Shinji yanked away. The look on his face when he glanced toward them sent alarm bells screeching through Sakura's mind and she looked at her teammates.
"We need to get out of here," she hissed, grabbing Naruto with one hand and Sasuke with the other.
"What? Why?" Naruto asked, although he didn't make any move to detach her hand from his as she started to pull him and Sasuke toward the two jonin trainers.
"The pen," Sasuke muttered from Sakura's other side, looking uncomfortable at having his hand held.
"Exactly," she replied grimly. "I think we should get Kakashi-sensei off this bridge before he notices who is standing right over there."
"Oh!" Naruto turned his head to look back at the disagreement on the far side. "Shinji looks really angry," he added.
"See?" Guy's voice rose and he pointed at the team's clasped hands as they approached. "I must apologize for misjudging your students. They truly are pure hearted individuals who will excel in their efforts. Just look at that teamwork, that companionship. I'm so moved!" To the surprise of the genin, tears started to well out of Guy's eyes and drip down his cheeks. Kakashi merely shook his head, covering his face with a hand.
"We're wasting the day," Sasuke said firmly as Sakura rapidly dropped his and Naruto's hands.
"Yeah, Sensei!" Naruto fisted both of his hands and threw them up toward the sky. "You should teach us something totally cool to make up for making us wait all day!"
Sakura started to put in her two-cents on the matter when a new voice spoke from behind her, interrupting whatever she was about to say.
"I'm sorry… but did they just call you 'Sensei?'"
Kakashi's single eye swept over to look past Sakura's shoulder. Even though he wasn't looking at her, the girl felt something akin to fear clench her stomach painfully at the expression in that eye. It was amazing how much he could convey with a single look and what she saw terrified her. She had seen it not too long ago while standing on a much larger bridge. She hurried out of his line of sight, setting herself up behind Sasuke.
"Shinji," Kakashi murmured evenly, hands immediately shoving into his pockets. His eye swiveled to look at the woman attempting to pull Shinji back toward the wagon. "Megumi. You've grown up nicely, I see."
The woman gulped slightly but held firmly onto Shinji's arm, tugging uselessly. She wore the dark kimono of a married woman, although Sakura guessed she wasn't very old, and there was no sign of a forehead protector anywhere on her body. This was a civilian and much too young to be the mother of Hekai's nephews but too old to be Shinji's daughter. If the kunoichi had to hazard a guess, she supposed this was a sister.
"He'll be here soon. Come on," Megumi urged, still getting nowhere with her frantic pulling.
"No, no," Shinji murmured, shaking her off with a single motion. "My mind is blown; I really need to confirm this."
"Hm." Kakashi's eye narrowed briefly before relaxing into his typical, careless slant. "Come on, you three. We have more important things to do today." He spun on his heel and started back over the bridge. With a couple tentative glances between their instructor and Shinji, Team Seven started to follow. Guy shot a dark look in the Hibei's direction, his ridiculous crying bout gone without a trace.
From behind them, Shinji laughed. Sakura felt a shudder run down her spine at the mirthless noise and she couldn't help but steal a look back at him. His lip was curled, ruining his once-good looks. Sakura had a feeling, though, that she'd never find him even remotely attractive again. There was a cruel vibe wafting off him that was mirrored in his eyes as he gazed at Kakashi's retreating back.
"I knew our Lord Hokage was a little odd, but seriously? Who lets children alone with a faggot?"
Kakashi's steps paused. Beside him, Guy put a restraining hand on the Copy-Nin's arm while Team Seven gawked back at Shinji. Inner-Sakura started to boil in anger, raving about how anyone could dare call their sensei such a thing. Her rage was nearly enough to cause her to speak out. Naruto beat her to it, spinning and jabbing a finger at Shinji.
"Hey!" the boisterous blonde spat, "I don't know who the hell you think you are, but no one talks to Kakashi-sensei like that!"
"Leave it, Naruto," Kakashi growled warningly, still not looking back at Hibei. Slowly, he started forward again and Guy released him.
"But, Sensei-" Naruto started to argue. "This jerk just called you gay! You're just going to stand there and let him insult you like that?"
"No, I'm going to head for the training grounds so we can get something done today that doesn't involve listening to a bigoted windbag," Kakashi replied dryly, his eye settling on Naruto. His expression was not open to debate and Naruto clammed up, although he didn't seem pleased about it.
Sakura chanced another glance at Shinji and winced as she fell into step beside Naruto. The man looked livid, although whether it was because he was being called a 'bigot' or if it was because Kakashi wasn't rising to the insult, she wasn't sure.
"Brother," Megumi begged, coming forward again to snag his sleeve. "Let's just go. This isn't worth getting all worked up over." She lowered her voice although Sakura still heard the words clearly. "It's been ten years, just let it die already."
"You think this is so easily forgiven?" Shinji shoved her away more forcefully than necessary considering he was a jonin and she was just a civilian. She stumbled back but was steadied by Hekai; the boy had appeared in a poof of smoke in time to prevent her from falling over.
"Shinji!" Hekai barked, eyes narrowing at the man. "That was uncalled for."
"Shut up, Brat," Shinji replied. "This doesn't concern either of you."
The boy frowned and Megumi burst into sobs that Sakura felt were a little bit too forced, like she was used to dissolving into tears to get her way. Shinji merely rolled his eyes and half-turned toward the lad. "Put your sister back in that damn carriage."
"You're holding onto old grudges, causing a scene," Hekai argued, not moving. "And anything that involves the family involves me."
Shinji sneered. "You weren't even born yet so don't pretend to understand adult issues. Do as you're told."
Glowering, Hekai started to pull his sister back toward the far side of the bridge, muttering at her under his breath. His eyes flicked up and caught Sakura's gaze. He mouthed an apology to her as he unsuccessfully attempted to corral Megumi back into the wagon. The young woman had gone limp, sprawling herself uselessly on the ground next to the carriage. Sakura felt bad for the friendly ninja; he seemed like a genuine sort of person. Not like Shinji, who apparently resorted to petty insults to get his way.
Sakura turned her back to the odd group, trying to force herself to remain calm despite the prickling sensation that was settling itself between her shoulder blades. She was upset over Shinji's actions – shoving his sister around, calling Kakashi bad names, insulting their Hokage – but she was only a genin. She could get away with lecturing Kakashi because, despite his cool exterior, he was actually a pretty good sport. She dreaded to think how Shinji would react if she let Inner-Sakura out to rage at him. A small part of her wished Kakashi would do something about the abysmal man on the bridge but her logical side said that would be stupid. All that man wanted was some sort of reaction from Kakashi and she was pretty sure that her sensei knew that. By merely not responding, Kakashi was insulting Shinji on the same level as calling someone a "faggot." It was beyond offensive. She could only imagine what was going through Kakashi's head.
They were nearly to the other side of the bridge and Sakura started to feel an inkling of hope that they'd left Shinji behind and could continue their day as usual. She should have known better, though. People like Shinji rarely gave up without a fight.
"Fine, take your little toys with you," the pale nin called after them. "Although that little pink-headed one doesn't look much your type, those boys had better watch themselves carefully. Start sleeping with an eye open, lads."
Kakashi stopped walking again and Sakura chanced a glance at up his face. It was unreadable and she felt a tingle of fear creep along her spine. Kakashi usually only had three expressions that she was aware of: anger, boredom, and that occasional smile that reached his eye. It could not be a good sign if he was completely devoid of emotion.
Whatever bad blood was between Shinji and Kakashi, it didn't need to come to a head on the bridge right then. It was obvious that Kakashi was trying to avoid a fight. Not sure what else to do, Sakura snagged the hem of Guy's flak jacket, tugging urgently. She reasoned that if they were as good of friends as Iruka seemed to think, then Guy would be able to keep Kakashi moving. The eccentric jonin peered down at her curiously then at Kakashi when she pointed at the other man. Her motion was too late, though, as Kakashi spun back around to look at Shinji.
"You will leave my students out of this," he uttered, his voice dangerously quiet.
"Well, that got a reaction, didn't it?" Shinji mused aloud, a smirk flicking across his features. "You did always like them younger."
Kakashi's eye hardened and Guy's hand landed heavily on his shoulder. The green-clad jonin leaned in, muttering something into Kakashi's ear that Sakura couldn't hear. It seemed to have some sort of effect on her sensei, though, because he nodded slightly and started to relax. He took a step backwards and started to turn around to continue on his way.
"Yes, do as your boyfriend suggests and ignore me," Shinji called. "Although I do have to say that you sure didn't trade up, did you?"
There was a moment of still silence from the two sensei before Guy burst into a startling bout of laughter. The genin stared at him for a long moment, startled by the sudden jubilant noise.
"Shinji," Guy said between chortles. "You are quite mistaken, of course. Kakashi is my eternal rival and nothing more. Perhaps you should actually do a little bit of research before attempting insults." He paused and pointed to himself with his thumb. "Besides, anyone who ends up with this sexy beast would be trading up."
"Is that guy for real?" Naruto muttered from Sakura's side. She merely shook her head, rendered speechless by the entire exchange.
"Cha, whatever. You're about as queer as he is. Green leotard and orange leg warmers? I'm guessing you're the woman, eh?" Shinji sneered, snickering at his own joke.
Guy seemed completely at ease with the insults, though, shrugging them off. "Think what you will," he told the other ninja. "But you're merely jealous that I can make this," he motioned to his body with an extravagant sweep of his arm, "look this good."
"You will also leave my friends out of this," Kakashi interrupted, pushing Guy back a step with his hand. "You are nothing more than a coward hiding behind insults and insinuation. You're not worth the dirt on the bottom of my sandal." He spun and started across the bridge again, motioning for his team to follow. They plodded after him obediently, not bothering to hide the baffled looks on their faces.
"I'm the coward, am I?" Shinji called back. "Look who's the one running away. To think that Yasu ruined his life for a fag like you."
Sakura's head whipped around to blatantly stare at Shinji. She heard Naruto make a strangled, choked-off noise and saw Sasuke's intense gaze from the corner of her eye. Nearby, Kakashi's visible pupil had shrunk to a pinprick and Sakura suddenly wished she was anywhere but on that bridge right then. A silence stretched out across the open area between the two groups, only the sound of the river rushing under them audible.
"Guy." Kakashi's voice was soft as he addressed the other jonin. "Will you please take my students to the Sixth Training Ground so they can work on their taijutsu?"
"Kakashi," Guy started uncertainly.
"I'll be fine but I do not want them here right now." His eye narrowed although he had yet to turn around to face Shinji again. He dropped his voice to ensure it would not carry across the bridge to the Hibei ninja. "He is not an honorable man and I don't want them hurt by his carelessness."
Guy hesitated for a minute before nodding. "Don't do anything foolish," the taller man murmured before looking at the bewildered genin. "Well, come along! You guys are in luck; it isn't every genin that gets private lessons with Konoha's Green Beast."
Sakura found herself hustled along by the over-excitable jonin. She tried to catch a glimpse of her sensei before they rounded a bend and disappeared behind some trees. The look of pure hatred she witnessed before Kakashi turned around sent her stomach into her knees.
Kakashi told himself that he should have just stayed in bed that morning. He had been tempted to do so when his alarm had gone off at six. His blankets were warm, his mattress was soft, and his pillow had been whispering his name so invitingly. But he had forced himself to get up and get dressed, made his feet walk the path to the memorial stone, and then dutifully tore himself away from there in order to go to the tower.
His first sign that he should have just given up and gone home was that missing mission scroll. Things turned downhill quickly when he inadvertently eavesdropped on a very emotional break-up between two of his acquaintances. Now, just as he was hoping to have some normalcy in his day, this had to happen. And in front of his team, too.
It was perhaps that last point that grated on him the most. He had wanted to leave them out of anything concerning his personal life. Period. Now there would be even more questions he would have to avoid. He just hoped Guy kept his mouth shut. He had the sinking feeling that the other jonin would feel obligated to do a bit of explaining, though, and Kakashi was going to have to run damage control once he got his team back.
He watched as the three genin were ushered off by Guy before turning to face Shinji. His eye flicked briefly to the family by the carriage but disregarded them almost immediately. Megumi was finally shoved back into her coach and the three boys were attempting to keep her there by barring the doors. Although the youngest looked on uncertainly, the other two boys were staring daggers at Kakashi. Apparently Shinji had told them something of Yasu, though Kakashi was pretty sure it was steeped in derogatory terminology, painting Kakashi as the bad guy.
Kakashi walked forward a few paces until he was just a couple yards from where Shinji stood. There he waited, deciding to allow Shinji the first move. As much as he hated the Hibei man, Kakashi would rather be able to claim self-defense for any injuries Shinji would endure if it came to physical blows.
"Don't want your precious kiddies to hear the truth, I see," Shinji scoffed the moment Kakashi stopped walking.
"I told you that you will leave them out of this," Kakashi replied evenly. He clenched his fists but made no other move.
Shinji shrugged. "So protective. They seem younger than your usual, even. Branching out?"
Kakashi's eye twitched. "I'm gay, not a pedophile," he said bluntly. Now that his students were out of earshot and it was just him and the Hibei clan, Kakashi had no reasons to guard his word choice.
"A freak of nature is a freak of nature," Shinji returned waspishly. "I'm surprised anyone in this village trusts you around children. You're bound to wash off on them, ruining even more lives with your…" Shinji encompassed Kakashi with a vague gesture and a sound of disgust.
"You've always been a close-minded moron," Kakashi muttered through his teeth. "Ten years and you still think I corrupted Yasu by standing too close to him." He shook his head in mock-disbelief. "You're really a piece of work, Shinji. He was born that way, just like the rest of us."
Shinji snorted scornfully. "That's what they all say but I know differently. Yasu was fine before you came along."
"He was fine after I came along, too, until you stuck your nose where it didn't belong." Kakashi shifted his weight onto the balls of his feet and crossed his arms. "Just like you're doing now."
The other man's lips pulled back from his teeth in a grimace. "It was my duty to stop his disgraceful actions before they put a blemish on our family name."
"Of course," Kakashi answered darkly. "You couldn't have him ruining the name any more than you're already doing. Ego hates competition." Kakashi felt a small pang of satisfaction at the twitch that started to develop next to Shinji's eye. "But was it your duty to barge into my afternoon? I haven't done anything to you lately that I'm aware of."
"Just your existence is enough." Shinji stepped into a slightly wider stance. "You lost my family a damn good candidate for furthering our connections-"
Kakashi laughed a single, short bark that held no humor. "Yes, because that's all your family is to you: marriage fodder to make you money." Kakashi let his eye wander over to Hekai. The boy looked no more than nine or ten, although extremely talented by the quality of the teleport-flicker he had used earlier. "You probably already have his life planned out, too. Poor kid. Not even a teenager and you have him promised to the highest bidder. It must have cost you a fortune to get rid of your sister; you've got to make up the lost income somehow."
His words had the desired effect as Shinji's face started to redden. Kakashi silently dared him to attack, wanting nothing more at that moment than to smash Shinji's face into the cobbles of the bridge. He was pretty certain that he outmatched Shinji, despite their similar rank, and it would give him some small bit of satisfaction to disgrace him in front of that damnable family of his. The death-glares Kakashi was receiving from the other two boys spoke volumes of how deep-seeded the prejudice ran in the Hibei line. Only Hekai seemed uncomfortable with the proceedings and was busying himself with the oxen.
"What I do with my family is none of your business," Shinji snarled.
"And what I do with my life is none of yours," Kakashi spat back before Shinji had a chance to voice another thought. "So finish up whatever business you have in Konoha and get the fuck out of my town."
Whatever Shinji was going to reply was cut off as one of the glaring-boys called from his spot by the carriage. "Oy, Dad, Uncle Itou's here. Wrap it up with the queer so we can go eat some lunch."
Kakashi's eye snapped over to the speaker and then beyond him to the man standing near the oxen. Words he had overheard that morning echoed in his head, rebounding off his mental walls as he stared openly at Tori. He almost felt a stab of pity for the small jonin, forcibly married into a family full of chauvinistic ass-wipes. But, after having heard how Tori handled the situation with Iruka, Kakashi just could not muster the will to think anything except that the Itou man deserved the Hibei clan.
Mirthless laughter bubbled up from inside before Kakashi had a chance to put a cap on in. The turn of events was just too ridiculous. He met the light blue eyes of his old squad-mate and winked before taking a step back, disappearing in a swirl of smoke.
The moment they reached the clearing of the Sixth Training Ground, Sakura spun and pointed a finger at Guy. "We want answers!" she demanded with no preamble. Beside her, Naruto nodded vigorously. Sasuke didn't object, narrowing his gaze at the man in the leotard. Any inhibitions he had about discovering what was up with the Hibei had flown out the window the moment Shinji started name-calling.
Guy regarded them quietly for a moment, his face grim. In all reality, he should probably keep his mouth shut concerning what happened on the bridge. He wondered, though, how much worse their imaginations would make it if they weren't at least told the basic truth. "My Eternal Rival is a secretive person," he started slowly, folding his arms. He leaned back against a training post, crossing his ankles.
"So you don't know anything about him?" Sakura deflated.
"I never said that," Guy returned, lips turning down. He glanced up at the sky, sighed, and returned his gazed to the genin. He matched each one's look with a stern one of his own. "But I will not tell the faint of heart a single thing about him unless I know the intentions are pure."
Naruto screwed his face up. "What?"
"We just want to understand," Sakura said, drawing Guy's attention away from the baffled Naruto in order to give the blonde time to digest what Guy had said. "We want to help. He's been so out of sorts lately."
"Perhaps an outlining of what you have already surmised?" Guy suggested.
Sakura nodded and told the jonin about the odd encounter with Soto, as well as her and Naruto's trip to the archives. She kept it succinct, taking less than a couple minutes to relay the little bit of information they had figured.
"It's got something to do with this Yasu guy," Naruto added with certainty. "And with ANBU. Was Yasu ANBU?"
"Yasu was, and most likely still is, a civilian," Guy answered simply.
"Who is he?" Sakura asked quietly, wondering at Guy's wording.
"This is not my story to tell," Guy warned, his face so serious the team had to wonder if this was the same guy from the bridge who had burst into tears over a mere hand-holding.
"Anything would be helpful," Sakura urged. "Maybe just tell us why Shinji is so angry at Kakashi-sensei. He called him such mean things."
Guy teetered on the edge of indecision. The pink-haired girl, at least, seemed genuine in her concern. It was harder to read the Uchiha lad. Naruto, though, was an open book. The hyperactive genin's serious face mirrored Guy's own. With a nod to himself, Guy made a quick decision. "Be tactful about how you handle this information," he cautioned, holding up a finger in forewarning, "because if you turn it on him, you will make an enemy of Konoha's most fabulously noble Green Beast." He took a deep breath and regarded their eager faces from behind his lashes, wondering how to say what he was about to say. He was not exactly known for his subtlety so perhaps blunt was the best option.
"Shinji is angry at Kakashi," he said carefully, "because he blames Kakashi for turning Yasu into a homosexual." His words were met with initially blank stares.
"But that doesn't make any sense," Sakura started uncertainly, finger coming up to her lips. She bit on her nail in thought.
"Yeah. Kakashi-sensei isn't gay," Naruto added, his face turned into a deep frown. "Why would that-"
"Actually," Guy interjected, shifting his back against the post, "he is."
The stillness that descended in the clearing was palpable as three sets of pre-teen eyes stared at Guy.
"But…" Naruto started. Sakura interrupted him.
"But people are born that way, not turned that way," she argued, ignoring whatever it was that Naruto was about to say. "At least, that's what my mom told me. Why would Shinji blame our sensei for something that can't be helped?"
"He seems like an ass," Sasuke spoke for the first time since they'd arrived at the training ground. Guy could practically see the smoldering anger radiating from the Uchiha. "Blames the nearest scapegoat on things he cannot comprehend."
Naruto was looking between his teammates, obviously surprised by how calmly they were taking the revelation. He looked about ready to start objecting, although to what Guy wasn't sure. The jonin waited quietly, giving the genin a moment to gather himself.
"But he seems so normal," Naruto finally managed.
"Normal?" Sakura repeated. "He walks around reading porn and making up lame excuses for being late. We've never seen him eat and he giggles at his own bad jokes. How is that normal?"
"Well, normal... ish." Naruto threw his hands up helplessly. "Seriously, Bushy Brow-sensei?" he turned his eyes back to Guy, who pointedly ignored the name.
"I have never been more sincere in my entire life. And I am very, very sincere about everything."
Naruto quieted for a long moment while his team watched him mull the information over. He looked more pale than usual and Guy wondered if he needed to sit down.
"Can I… can I go for a bit?" Naruto murmured after his face contorted into a decidedly queasy expression. "I think I need some time to… to think."
"Naruto," Sakura started, the lecturing tone creeping into her voice. Guy cleared his throat, bringing her attention away from her comrade and to the jonin. He shot her a silencing look before nodding to Naruto.
"Of course," Guy said graciously. Without another word, Naruto turned around and trudged out of sight through the trees surrounding the training ground. The moment he was out of earshot, Sakura's temper exploded.
"Sensei!" she near-hollered. "How could you just let him go like that?"
"Not everyone is as accepting of such news so quickly," Guy told her honestly. "The fact that two out of three are so keen on this information is a surprise to me. Your mother has taught you to think with an open mind and an open heart, Sakura," he said kindly. "As for you," he looked over at Sasuke questioningly.
"I had a gay uncle," the Uchiha muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets. He kicked a rock near his foot and watched it bounce off one of the practice targets. "He was a nice man."
Guy nodded a few times in understanding. "Whereas you must remember: Naruto had no one to teach him these things as an impressionable youth. He must figure it out on his own now. Be patient with him. I can see in his eyes that he adores your sensei. He will come around." Guy took a deep breath and let it out before suddenly jumping forward, landing in a wide stance only a couple feet from the two remaining genin.
"Now!" he exclaimed, raising his fist to the air. "Let us commence a most excellent taijutsu lesson until my Honorable Rival arrives to take the helm of this boat of youthfulness! Bam!" The genin were forced to scramble out of the way as a body made of spandex launched himself headlong into their midst.
Kakashi watched quietly for a moment while Guy chased two of the members of Team Seven around the practice field. It was a comical mis-match of skill and Kakashi could tell that Guy wasn't even using a quarter of his strength and speed, but he didn't feel quite like interrupting yet. He tried not to think about what Guy may or may not have told them and he noted Naruto's obvious absence. Knowing the boy's penchant for a full frontal attack, not seeing him attempt to spar Guy head-on meant he was not there at all.
Finally, knowing he would have to face them eventually, Kakashi dropped out of a tree to land right on top of Guy. The bowl-cut ninja landed face first into the dirt with Kakashi crouched on his back, forearms resting on his knees. He raised a hand at this startled students. "Yo."
"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura looked relieved and Kakashi felt a little better at her enthusiasm to see him. He turned his gaze to Sasuke; the boy nodded a greeting and Kakashi took that as a good sign, too.
"One," the Copy-Nin said, standing and stepping off Guy's back so the other man could stand. He pointed at Sakura then at Sasuke. "Two." He looked around deliberately then tilted his head at Guy. "You seem to have lost one."
"Ah, his youthful vigor needed time to accumulate itself," Guy explained, dusting off his front. "And that did not count," he added. "I had not challenged you. Yet." The taller jonin started to point a finger at Kakashi but the other adult waved a hand dismissively.
"I'm vetoing any challenges you issue today," Kakashi replied frankly before Guy had the chance to speak further. "I would not be at my best and then you'd feel cheated in your victory."
"Circumstances being what they are, I will forgive you for not accepting any." Guy looked pleased with his own courteousness and Kakashi let him be so. He wasn't in the mood to argue with Guy over whether or not Kakashi needed his forgiveness for anything.
"Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura shuffled forward, her hands clasped in front of her chest. She started to reach a tentative hand toward him then thought better of it, twining her fingers together once more where they rested against her shirt. He stared blandly down at her, shoving his hands into his pockets and slouching as per usual. "Uhm," she hummed out slightly then glanced over at Sasuke as if silently asking him to lend her a hand. The other genin seemed disinclined to speak but wasn't avoiding his gaze.
Guy suddenly struck a pose and gave Kakashi a thumbs up. "They are totally cool with it," was all he said before saluting. "Until next time, my Eternal Rival! I leave you with your fantastically hip prodigies!" He poofed out of the area and Kakashi sighed.
"Sorry to leave you with him," he muttered to the junior shinobi.
"He's insane," Sakura said bluntly. "But we're glad you're okay."
Kakashi blinked silently for a minute before allowing his eye to curve upwards in a soft smile. "Thank you, Sakura. Now, let's see what you managed to learn from Guy-"
There was a movement from the direction of town and Kakashi spun, kunai out instantly. He was not expecting anyone else to show up and, after encountering Shinji, he was a bit on edge. Surprisingly, it was a Black Ops agent. Kakashi lowered his guard and opened his mouth to question the man's sudden appearance. He didn't get a chance to speak as the ANBU pointed back toward town.
"Maki Street is burning!" he gasped out. "All hands are being called for the fire brigade." Then he was gone, moving on the next group to send out the alert. Kakashi glanced at his students for half a second, barely registering the alarm on their faces before he took off toward town at a dead sprint through the trees. He lived on Maki Street.
"I'm so sorry, Kakashi-sensei." Sakura stood half a step behind him, her voice quavering and raspy from smoke inhalation. On his other side, Sasuke's white shorts were covered in dark black soot. Kakashi's own uniform was smeared with the results of fire-fighting. In front of him, barely remaining upright as most of the support beams had burned through, was what remained of his apartment building. On either side, more buildings – homes and businesses alike – stood devastated from the fire. It had been caused by an appliance short-circuiting in a seamstress' shop and it spread quickly, the old timber being the perfect tinder after such hot, dry weather. The scope of the damages had not yet been fully assessed but Kakashi didn't give a damn. The only thing he currently cared about was right in front of him.
Slowly, despite the threat of the top half of the building collapsing on him, Kakashi stepped over the threshold where the door used to stand. His kitchen was completely gone, twisted metal pipes the only indication of where his sink once stood. His refrigerator was a blackened husk, his kitchen table a pile of ash on the floor. He walked through it, already too filthy to care. He couldn't even identify where his couch had sat or what had happened to the contents of his bookshelf. He was glad he had brought Icha Icha with him that morning, saving it from the fate of his other books.
Carefully, not wanting to cause what was left of the apartment above him to come crashing down, Kakashi moved to the far side of his home, kicking up poofs of gray dust as he moved. The ash was hot on his toes but he ignored the discomfort, still in a state of shock from the entire thing. His bedroom door was miraculously still on its hinges, although the wall beside it was essentially gone, making the whole concept of a door pointless. Kakashi stepped into his bedroom and poked around dully, looking for anything that had escaped the fire. His bed was badly burnt, his wooden chest of tools completely crisped. Most of his metal weaponry looked intact but anything with a wooden handle was rendered nearly useless. His wardrobe was gone, his closet full of blackened uniforms. The smell was horrible even through his mask.
Realizing he really couldn't salvage anything, Kakashi dropped down onto his hands and knees next to the rubble of his bed. He started pawing under the drooping mattress until his fingers contacted something square. He yanked it out, ignoring how hot it was to the touch. It was a metal box about the size of a cookie tin and in it were the only possessions he really cared about. Praying silently to whoever was listening, he tore the lid off with slightly seared fingers. Inside, warm but whole, was a pile of pictures and important documents. He pressed the lid back over the top, stood, and left the building, clutching the treasure to his chest tightly.
"Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura asked timidly as he stood near them. He turned his doleful gaze to her. "Are you okay?" she whispered. He could see his expression mirrored in her face, the sight of the destruction taking its toll on her naïve mind. Dully, he nodded.
"Go home, you two," he muttered, his own voice hoarse. "No training tomorrow." The dismissal in his tone was obvious and, after just a second of hesitation, the genin slogged away through a street that ran black with the mixture of soot from the debris and the water used to put out the blaze. He lingered just a moment himself before turning away and following after them. He had to get to the tower and request temporary accommodations until he could find a new apartment. As much as he hated having to live in government housing, packed in like a sardine with a neighbor practically on his lap, it beat sleeping in the street. Shinobi housing at least came fully furnished and there usually were a couple of apartments empty at any given time due to the death-rate of the occupants.
He barely registered any of the walk to the tower, lost in his thoughts. He wasn't particularly attached to most of the items in his apartment but it still hurt to know that it was all gone. His favorite stir-fry book, his collection of interesting scrolls, his shuriken-themed bed sheets… all gone because someone hadn't unplugged their fucking coffee pot.
The tower was abuzz with activity when he arrived, people being dispatched to take care of the clean-up and check for bodies. It was ridiculous to think everyone made it out of the blaze alive and search and rescue teams were being rapidly assembled. Kakashi moved past troops of chunin as they hustled out of the building, letting his feet take him automatically toward the administrative wing of the tower.
The housing department was manned by a single chunin, her colleagues having been borrowed by the fire brigade. Her hair was pulled back in a severe bun that did nothing to alleviate the pinched expression that adorned her face. Kakashi felt a little apprehensive the moment he saw her and the sour expression she wore. It would have been best to butter her up a bit before making requests but he was too tired to play nice right then.
"I need a room," he told her bluntly without as much as a 'hello.'
She sized up his filthy appearance, noting the hitai-ate and his mask. People knew who he was and he saw the flicker of recognition pass across her eyes. Her expression immediately softened as she cleared her throat delicately into her hand and shuffled a few papers on her desk.
"I'm sorry, Sir, but there aren't any," she told him, sympathy creeping into her voice.
He blinked a couple times at her dumbly. "What?"
"They're all loaned out right now," she reiterated patiently. He could see the pity in her eyes. "I know it couldn't be helped, but your neighborhood picked a very bad time to burn down."
"No… rooms…" he repeated dully, the information slow to sink in. He had just lived through one of the shittiest days he'd had in a very long time and this was not what he wanted to hear. He would have to get a hotel but that would be more expensive than the cheap rent shinobi had to pay for the studio-style apartments.
"There aren't any in town at all," the chunin continued. "I have reports that the only rooms left in the hotels have already been reserved."
"Reserved?" he mumbled, confused. His head was starting to throb.
The woman peered up at him, brow furrowed. "The Chunin Selection Exams are only a week away, Sir. There won't be a free room in town until after they start and some of the applicants either drop out or are killed. I'm afraid we've had to accommodate more this year than usual and there simply isn't anywhere we can put you. You'll have to stay with a friend."
Kakashi stared at her, the words not processing quickly. When they finally sank in, Kakashi clutched his box a little closer to his chest. He didn't exactly have a friend he could stay with, although his mind started shuffling through prospective candidates anyway.
Sakura's mom, as far as he could tell, hated him on principal. Mrs. Haruno had never been enthusiastic that her only daughter's sensei was a porn-reading pathological liar. The brief time he had actually met the woman, she had threatened him with bodily harm - and with an egg beater – should her daughter befall any sort of harm due to his lackadaisical negligence.
Even if Naruto hadn't been avoiding him, Kakashi also counted the blonde out for temporary accommodations. The jonin dismissed the idea of Sasuke as well. Both of the male members of Team Seven lived in the smallest of the single-roomed shinobi housing; there simply wouldn't be room for a houseguest.
That left Guy and Kakashi shuddered to think of ever sharing a living space with the King of the Fashionably-Challenged. He would rather sleep in someone's doorway than in that crazy man's living room. The last time Kakashi had been between homes, he had taken Guy up on his offer to crash on his couch for a few days. That had been a colossal mistake. If he remembered correctly, Guy routinely woke up at four-thirty in the morning to exercise, something that was often punctuated by loud battle-cries and impromptu motivational speeches. Not even at kunai-point would Kakashi agree to cohabitate with that man again.
Deflated, Kakashi walked out of the housing department and made his way to the ground floor of the building. If the weather report was anything to go by, they were in for more warm temperatures. He may have been lacking a sleeping roll or, well, anything except for his memory-box, but it wouldn't be the worst night to sleep under the stars. He was about to head for the memorial stone when a hand on his arm stopped him from leaving. Startled that he had been caught unawares, he glanced at the offending hand then traced his gaze up the arm to settle on the face.
"Iruka?" he mumbled, not even bothering with the honorific. The other man was just as sooty as Kakashi. A puddle of black liquid was pooling at his feet, carried there from Maki Street by the chunin's sandals.
"I ran into Sakura on my way back," Iruka explained, ignoring the lack of title. Considering the circumstances, it didn't seem appropriate. "She told me you lived there."
Kakashi merely nodded blankly. His eyes fixated on a smear across Iruka's cheek, not wanting to see pity or sympathy in the other man's eyes. He frowned as an acrid scent wafted off the chunin when the younger man shifted. Kakashi tilted his head and looked more closely at Iruka's pony-tail. His hair was definitely singed; he had been in the thick of the fire and had not come out completely unscathed.
"Were you able to find housing?" Iruka continued, either ignoring or failing to notice Kakashi's odd scrutiny.
Kakashi shook his head in response. His throat hurt from the ash-filled air he'd been forced to breathe during the fire-fighting efforts; he really didn't want to talk much.
"Anywhere to stay at all?" Iruka pressed, frowning at the vacant expression that was starting to settle over the jonin's face.
Again, all Kakashi could do was shake his head. He was extremely tired and felt his eyelid starting to droop. He really wanted to lie down somewhere and forget this entire day even happened. A lost mission scroll, Shinji, being outted to his team, and then losing his house all in less than twenty-four hours was a bit much to fully process, even for someone like Kakashi who had known nothing but misfortune most of his life.
"Come on." Iruka gave Kakashi's sleeve a tug, sending up a little cloud of ash.
"Hn?" It wasn't exactly an intelligent response but it got his point across.
Iruka sighed and gave his arm another gentle pull. "My couch is a hide-a-bed," he said patiently. "It's not the most comfortable piece of furniture in existence, but it beats nothing."
"Why?" Kakashi finally croaked as his feet started to move forward under Iruka's coaxing. They exited the building and started toward the shinobi apartments, Iruka still holding onto Kakashi's forearm as if he was afraid Kakashi would keel over if he let go.
Iruka frowned briefly at Kakashi. "Your house just burnt down." He obviously thought that was explanation enough.
"You're not my friend," Kakashi said next, his word-filter not working properly as exhaustion slowly took over. "You don't even like me."
The chunin paused and Kakashi nearly collided with his back. "What gave you that impression?" the younger man asked, obviously bewildered. He really didn't hide his emotions well but Kakashi didn't care at that point.
"Because you run off whenever I spend five minutes in your company?" Kakashi offered.
Iruka sighed and shook his head. "That's an exaggeration," he scolded. "I can manage at least fifteen minutes before you do something childish that chases me away."
Kakashi recognized the joke and made an honest attempt to chuckle. It came out as a hack followed by a cough that ended in a wheeze. Iruka seemed to understand what the noise was supposed to be and smiled back. He started walking again, and Kakashi, arm still held captive by Iruka, followed obediently.
The climb up the many stairs to the top floor was grueling but Kakashi didn't complain. He plodded along doggedly, brushing off Iruka's offers to pause and rest. He was relieved when they finally hit the outer walkway of the top level. A short walk later and Iruka was unlocking his door. Kakashi was ushered inside and, despite his fatigue, he took a minute to glance around the apartment.
It was small, as expected, but still larger than the ones Naruto and Sasuke lived in. Iruka had a living room/dining room combo that contained the previously mentioned couch, a coffee table, and a dining table with two chairs pushed neatly in. The kitchen was small and open to the dining area, but it looked well organized to utilize what little space there was. The refrigerator was plastered with photographs of Iruka and his students, the collage held up with a variety of amusing magnets shaped like anything from ninja weapons to fruit. He even had one of those little magnet sets made up of pre-printed words so people could make them into sayings or poems. Currently, it wrote out "as it the be unfolded not cat to wagon is fish bee totebag," which Kakashi took to mean "I don't actually use this for anything but to tack up more photographs."
As Kakashi scrutinized artwork Iruka had tacked to a corkboard in the dining area, Iruka disappeared into one of the two other doors in the apartment. Many of the "masterpieces" were signed by the child who drew it and dated with their age and the year. He marveled at the sheer number, most of which were some theme of a generic drawing of Iruka standing with a generic drawing of the child. Arrows were usually involved, along with words to indicate which stick-figure was Iruka and which stick-figure was the student. The oldest picture was dated three years ago and had the words "My New Awesome Teacher" chicken-scratched and poorly spelled across the top. The signature in the corner indicated the artist was only six when they drew it.
The sound of Iruka's footsteps approaching dragged Kakashi away from the corkboard. He stared at the bundle Iruka was offering him before setting down his memento box on the dining table in order to take it.
"If you don't fit in those, I'll be very surprised," Iruka told him with a glance at the other ninja's stature. "There's a drawstring on the sweats incase they're a little loose. You look narrower than me but the length'll be perfect. You can shower first. The towels in there are fresh so use whatever you need. I'll get this thing ready for you so you can sleep; if you're even half as tired as you look, you'll be wanting to go to bed soon." Iruka pat the back of the couch to indicate what he was talking about.
Kakashi moved automatically toward the bathroom but paused halfway there. He turned back around and stared at Iruka as the man started pulling the cushions off the couch. "Why?" he asked again, realizing he never received an actual answer on their way to the apartment.
Iruka considered Kakashi for a moment. "Do you really need a reason?"
"Yes," Kakashi replied firmly. "Why?"
Iruka sighed and shook his head. "I can't just be a nice guy?" he asked rhetorically. "Just consider this payback for almost costing you that mission payment. Now stop arguing and start showering. You smell like an ashtray."
Kakashi smirked slightly then moved toward the bathroom door again. He stopped on the threshold and glanced back over his shoulder. "Iruka?" he rasped.
"Yes?" the chunin looked up from where he was bent over, pulling out the folding bed from inside the couch.
"Thank you."
Iruka smiled, straightening his back. "You're welcome, Kakashi."