A/N: Vote for Cloud Nine and Smile for Me! Links on my profile! :) Okay, so most of y'all were wrong, totally off. But that's okay. It makes it more fun for me. I just want y'all to know that I was foreshadowing this so when it does get revealed you don't jump down my throat. Thank you for the amazing reviews, even though I didn't get to 1500 (it was a long shot) but I got close! Also, I'm in creative writing. So the people that are screaming at me that I don't write enough- I have to write a short story almost every other day. And my short stories range from ten to fifteen pages. So don't tell me that I don't write enough. I write every day. I write more than I sleep.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

"I'm the only man in the world with a marriage license made out 'To Whom It May Concern'."
-Mickey Rooney

I Should Be Worried about the Yellow Stains on the Walls

When I was little, I used to dream about what the house that I would live in with my husband would look like. The walls would be lavender, the carpet would be a light pink, there would only be natural lighting that came from the windows and the sun roofs scattered randomly throughout the house. And at night we would light candles and watch the stars together as we talked about our feelings.

Edward's apartment was nothing like my dream house. It was bigger than my old apartment but there were no sun roofs, lavender walls, or pink carpet. There was a weird grey shaggy carpet that spread through the whole apartment, the walls were an off white color, and the roof was falling apart…we were on the first floor.

I set the box of clothes that I got from Emmett's jeep on the coffee table and stared at the room. "This looks cozy." It wasn't a lie. It was small and looked like a great place to cuddle with someone you love… if the roof doesn't cave in first.

"Sorry." Edward apologized. "I haven't had much time to go apartment hunting." It was obvious that he was embarrassed by his beat down apartment. I liked it though, the carpet may look bad and there may have been weird yellow stains scattered on the walls but it was home.

"I like it." I tried to sound optimistic as I looked around the apartment for Jake. I found him sniffing the couch. I took several steps to the white couch, keeping an eye on Edward so he doesn't suspect something. He was walking to the kitchen that was connected to the living room.

"Don't even think about it." I snapped at Jake when he lifted his hind leg up. He frowned at me before bringing it back down and walking across the apartment to sulk into the corner. He sat and stared at me, his head turned to the side. "I got my eyes on you." I growled at him as I pointed at my eyeballs and then at him. Jake smiled at me.

"Is Jake house trained?" Edward asked from the kitchen.

"Yes." I yelled at him but I was looking at Jake. My eyes narrowed on him. He just smiled at me. "You are house trained." I reminded him.

"Would like something to drink Bella?" Edward asked.

"I'm okay!" I yelled at him, still not taking my eyes off of Jake. Jake started to wag his tail at me. I didn't trust him. Jake was smart. He knew how to work around things and if I let him out of my sights, for a second, he would probably wiz on the couch.

I whistled as I patted my leg. "C'mon Jake, let's get you something to drink." Jake got onto his feet and started to follow after me. Not before stopping in front of Edward's couch. He was wagging his tail and smiling at me as his attention turned from me back to the couch. "If you even think about it, I will make you sleep outside." I warned Jake before I grabbed the skin on his neck and made him follow me into the kitchen.

The kitchen was a normal size kitchen for an apartment. The floor was this really ugly yellow tile and the fridge was the same off white as the walls but there were no yellow stains on it, so that was automatically a big plus.

"Do you have a bowl or some sort of container that I can use so Jake can drink some water?" I asked Edward.

He nodded once before grabbing the handle to a cupboard and pulling on it. The cupboard was filled with Glad containers. He grabbed a bowl and started to fill it up with water.

"Here you go Jake." He was hesitant about setting the bowl in front of him.

Jake stared at Edward and then at the bowl filled with water in front of him. He sniffed the bowl, while still keeping his eyes on Edward, he finally decided that it was safe and started to drink.

"Thanks Edward." I smiled at him.

"No problem." He looked back at me and smiled. "You know what. Jake's not a bad dog and I guess I could get use to the idea of him living with me."

Edward opened the right door to his fridge and pulled out a package of hot dogs. My eyes widened and I grabbed the package of hot dogs from him and threw it back into the fridge. He raised an eyebrow and frowned at me.

"What was that-"

"Jake doesn't like hot dogs." I whispered. "It makes him feel uncomfortable, like he's a cannibal. Don't let him know that you have them." I opened the fridge and looked around for something else that was Jake friendly. There was a package of sliced American cheese. I grabbed a slice and handed it to Edward. "Give this to him instead. He may get a little gassy but it won't hurt his feelings."

"Yeah," Edward rolled his eyes, "because we don't want to hurt Jake's feelings." His voice was laced with sarcasm.

He squatted as he unwrapped the slice of cheese. "Come here Jake." He patted his leg lightly. "Come here you big, scary horse wannabe."

I rolled my eyes and squatted next to him. Jake was staring at him as he continued to lick the water out of the container. Edward folded the slice of cheese in half and held it out for him. Jake stopped licking the water and narrowed his eyes in on the slice of cheese. Edward took advantage of this opportunity and took two small steps towards him.

"C'mon Jake." He continued to coo him. "You know you want the slice of cheese."

Jake kept his head down as he walked to Edward. His eyes didn't leave the slice of cheese. I had never seen him cautious about accepting a slice of cheese, or really any food, before. It was weird. I didn't know why Jake felt so threatened by Edward. It wasn't like he had done anything to hurt him or me. In fact, he'd actually helped us. He was giving us a place to stay, food, and a steady income. There was nothing bad about this situation.

Jake took the cheese from Edward and started to eat it.

"See," Edward held out his hands, "I'm not that bad of a guy. I gave you food."

He reached out to pat Jake on the head. Jake stopped eating and growled at him. Edward pulled his hand back and sighed. I rolled my eyes and pulled myself to my feet. It was going to take time for Jake and Edward to get a long but I had a feeling that before too long, they would be best friends.

"Are you hungry?" Edward asked.

I looked at him and nodded. "A little," I admitted, "I haven't had anything to eat since this morning."

"That's not healthy." Edward frowned at me.

"Are you always a doctor?" I asked him, playfully.

"Sorry," Edward blushed, "its habit. I tell that to patients all day and it kind of stuck with me."

"At least you're dedicated." I smiled at him. "So what's for dinner?" I decided to change the subject.

"I would say hot dogs but that seems to be out of the question," we both looked at Jake- he was licking the floor, "so how about pancakes?"

I laughed. "Pancakes sound great."

"So how was your day?" I asked Edward cutting up my syrup soaked pancake. "Did you save any lives?"

We were sitting on the couch listening to the TV while we ate our pancakes that Edward made. He was a great cook. I would not be surprised if he suddenly decided to stop being a doctor and decided to go to culinary school instead. In fact, I would encourage this decision because Edward was that good.

"It was good. No one died on me today, which was nice." He took a sip of his milk. "What about you?" He asked cutting another piece of his pancake. "Did you have a good day at work?"

"It was boring." I stabbed my fork into a piece of my pancakes. "I called Charlie today."

Edward dropped his fork, which made me look at him. His jaw had dropped and he was staring at me with dilated pupils. "What did he say?" He finally asked. "What did you tell him?"

"I told him the truth." I answered. "About how we met at the Lizard Lounge and how I asked you to marry me. And then I told him that we weren't getting a divorce because you don't want to disappoint your mom. Of course, that turned into an argument about how I was afraid that I'd turn into my mom and try to leave you."

Edward furrowed his eyebrows. "Your mom left you?" He asked.

"No." I shook my head. "She left my dad. She freaked out on my dad and decided to take me with her to Phoenix, where I lived until I was seventeen and decided to live with my dad."

"Why did you want to live with your dad?" Edward frowned at me.

I sighed. "Renee, my mom, got married and I decided that she and Phi, my step dad, needed time to be a married couple."

Edward smiled. "That was really considerate of you Bella."

I shrugged. "I guess you could say that."

"No," Edward shook his head, "it really is. You're aware of people's feelings, which is rare. You're a lot different than I thought you'd be."

My face dropped and I blinked. "What did you think I was like?"

Edward was quiet. "Do you really want to know?" He asked.

"Yeah, I think I do." I put my almost empty plate on the coffee table and crossed my legs under me on the couch. "What did you think of me before you actually met me?"

"Before you woke up, I assumed that you would be a whiny, spoiled, party type girl that didn't care about anyone but herself." Edward didn't look at me as he admitted this. "But obviously, I was wrong." He finally looked at me. "I'm sorry?" He made it a question.

"Don't be sorry." I smiled at him. "I can't say that I was much better. I was just happy you were cute."

Edward laughed. I blushed and stared at hands on my lap. I would never get over how easy it is for me to like Edward. He was like the best friend I'd always needed, except instead of being my friend, he was my husband. A sweet, loving, funny, caring, husband that was painfully honest.

"I'm glad we're going to make this work out." Edward smiled at me as he put his dish on the coffee table and grabbed my hand. "I have a question."

I nodded, signaling for him to ask away.

"Would you get angry," his voice got soft and he leaned in closer to me, "if I kissed you?"

"I don't know if I'm a good kisser." I admitted, blushing.

Edward chuckled. His breath grazed my lips and went into my nose. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. His breath smelled like maple syrup, which was surprisingly very sensual right now.

I let him close the distance between us. His lips pressed against mine softly. I didn't do anything. I was waiting for him to take control. Edward's hand left mine and he grabbed my cheek. I shivered. His hand was unbelievably cold. His middle finger pressed against my cheek bone and I moved my head to the side. Edward twisted his head to the other side and opened his mouth so he could let his tongue graze my bottom lip.

I blushed and pushed my face closer to his, opening my mouth. Edward used his other hand to push on my shoulder. My back fell onto the couch and I wrapped my arms around his neck. Edward's tongue found its way into my mouth.

This is when Jacob started barking. His loud barks started to turn into threatening growls and snaps. Normally, I would be worried about this but I was still riding the high of kissing Edward.

He pulled away from me. Both of our breaths were pants and we were staring at each other. He smiled at me as he leaned down and kissed my nose, which got another growl from Jake.

I turned my head to the side and stared at my dog. His head was bowed and his lips were curled over his gums. I turned back to Edward and mouth the words 'I'm sorry.'

He laughed. "I'm actually surprised he let me take it this far." He pulled himself off of me and went to sit on the other side of the couch.

"I am too." I admitted, not moving- I was still dazed by Edward's kissing skills. "He hardly ever lets you near me."

"I figured out why." Edward groaned.

I frowned as I pulled myself up so I was sitting on the couch instead of lying on it. Edward held up his plate that was once filled with bacon and pancakes. It was empty. There wasn't even a trail of syrup left.

"I hoped you liked it." He told Jake, who was still glaring at him. "I know I did."

I giggled and gave him an apologizing look. "I am so sorry. You can't leave food around or he'll eat it."

"I realize that now." Edward sounded aggravated.

"I'm really sorry." I frowned at him. "But he's a dog. Don't all dogs eat everything in sight?"

"I wouldn't know." Edward shrugged, setting his empty plate on the table. "I don't like dogs."

"I know." My face dropped even more. "This must be difficult for you."

Edward shrugged. "It's weird. But I'm sure I'll get used to it."

"Dogs aren't that bad." I tried to convince him. "They're man's best friend."

Edward looked at me. "I'm still a cat person."

I smiled at him as I tried to hide a yawn. But it was one of those yawns that you couldn't hide. My arms reached above my head and I opened my mouth as I let out a huge, long yawn. I was tired and a little sore. I really wanted to go to bed. Actually, I wanted to kiss Edward again but if that wasn't an option, the bed looked like a cozy second.

"Are you tried?" Edward frowned at me.

I looked at him and nodded. "Just a little." I admitted. "I can stay up though."

"No," Edward shook his head, "that's okay. I'm a little tired too." He got up from the couch and grabbed the dirty dishes. "I'll put up the dishes up and you can hang out in my room. I only have one room, if that's a problem- I can sleep on the couch and you can-"

"Didn't we already have this conversation?" I interrupted him. "Besides, we're married."

"We are married, aren't we?" Edward asked.

I nodded. "Still sounds weird, doesn't it?" I asked.

"Just a little." He smiled.

"So where's your room?" I asked getting off the couch.

"Down the hall," Edward pointed to the hallway, "it's the first door on the right."

"Do you mind if I take a shower?" I asked.

"Nope," he shook his head, "it's on the left across from my room."

"Thanks." I smiled at him as I grabbed the box of clothes that was now on the floor. It took all my strength not to tip over. I had way too much clothes.

"Do you need some help?" Edward frowned.

"No," I shook my head, "I got it." I was lying through my teeth. I didn't know why it was so heavy. It didn't bother me earlier but now I felt like I was carrying hundred pound weights. My legs were shaking and I was having a hard time standing up. I decided to blame it on being tired. I often got weak when I was tired.

I walked awkwardly down the hall with the box of clothes securely in my arms. Jake followed after me. I was actually kind of grateful he was behind me. I was afraid to leave him alone with Edward. I didn't trust Jake not to do something that will annoy Edward enough to kick us out.

I flipped the light switch on in Edward's room and my jaw dropped.

"Whoa, that's an awesome bed." I didn't realize I had said something until my voice echoed through my ears. Everything in his apartment looked like it was left behind by the people before him, except for Edward's room. Edward's room was filled with a huge bed that looked like it once belonged to some famous Victorian king or queen.

The frame was a black metal and had four poles reaching for the ceiling. The bed was covered with a white comforter that was filled with feathers. The white stood out against the black frame and the off white walls. It actually hurt my eyes. Edward's apartment was so dark and depressing and to have the white, actually white, sheets come out of nowhere; it was just too much brightness at one time.

I kicked the door closed with the heel of my foot and started to wobble to the bed. The box hadn't gotten lighter, in fact, it had somehow gotten heavier. Jake jumped onto the bed, the same moment I dropped the box onto it.

"That was heavy." I gasped at him as I rubbed my sore muscles. He sat on the edge of the bed and stared at me, his cocked to the side. "I'm fine." I promised him patting his head. "I'm just a little tired, that's all. You would be too if you had to scoop out ice cream all day."

Jake didn't say anything. He just continued to stare at me with his head cocked to the side. I sighed and chose to ignore him. He was just overreacting. Like most dogs do.

I opened up the box and dug through it as I looked for my pajama pants and a shirt that I could wear with it. Normally, I would just wear a shirt and panties but I didn't want to make Edward feel uncomfortable so I sucked it up and changed into a pair of blue plaid pajama pants and a baby blue spaghetti strap shirt.

I dropped the box on the floor and looked at Jake. He was sitting on Edward's bed with a huge smile on his face. "Don't even think about it." I warned, glaring at him. "I," I pointed at my chest, "I will kick you out."

Jake just wagged his tail and smiled at me.

I walked across the hall to the bathroom. I had never seen carpet in a bathroom before so it was weird walking into the bathroom and seeing the same shaggy grey carpet that was in the rest of Edward's apartment. The bathroom was small. There was a bathtub/shower, toilet, sink, and a mirror. There was also a little countertop that held the sink but it was so short that it didn't really stand out.

I put my clean clothes on the countertop and climbed out of my work clothes. I couldn't wait to take a shower. I was so excited. I pulled the see-through curtain away from the tub and stepped in. I manipulated the faucets till the water was a satisfactory warm temperature. The water beat down on my sore muscles and stiff bones. It was great.

I washed my body and hair and tried to make myself squeaky clean. I loved showers, after smelling like bar for a few days, I had never been so happy for a shower. I was on the verge of tears because I was so happy.

When I had cleaned myself enough that if I rubbed my two pieces of skin together they started to squeak, I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a baby blue towel that was lying across a handle attached to the wall around my body. I didn't waist anytime getting dressed. I had left Jake in Edward's room. There is no telling what that dog would do without me there to stop him.

I opened the door and jumped across the hallway into Edward's room. The sound of dishes being washed was coming from the kitchen, which made me feel a little bit more comfortable, that meant that I had time to clean whatever mess Jake might have left in Edward's room.

I closed the door with my foot and looked around Edward's room. He had a lot of CD that was stacked nicely against the wall, untouched, the floor was clean, minus a few stray dirty clothes that didn't make it to the dirty clothes hamper, and it smelled pretty decently. I looked at the bed; Jake was lying across it, his body stretched out so he was taking up all the space. Light snores were coming from his nose.

I sighed and put my hand on my beating heart. I thought Jake had torn up Edward's room. I was grateful to know that he had just fallen asleep on Edward's bed.

"You scared the heck out of me." I growled at him. He opened an eye and then stretched his legs before going back to sleep. The light snores getting louder. I sat at the end of Edward's bed and started to rub his ears. He let out another loud snore. "You know you're going to have to sleep on the floor, right?" He pretended not to hear me and moved his head out my hands before rolling onto his back and stretched out his legs.

I rolled my eyes and started to rub his stomach.

"Are you decent?" Edward asked through the wooden door.

"Yeah," I yelled at him, "I'm decent."

I grabbed onto Jake and tried to pull him off the bed. He didn't move. "C'mon Jake." I growled at him as I put my foot on the bed frame and started to pull. Jake just stared at me like I was a two year old that would go away if he ignored me long enough. "You can't sleep on the bed."

The door opened and Edward walked in. I started to get more desperate in my attempts to get Jake off Edward's bed. He wouldn't budge. "C'mon Jake." I screamed at him. "Get off Edward's bed." Jake used to sleep with me on my bed when we lived in my apartment but he also slept on the floor a lot. So it wasn't like it was a big step for him.

"Sorry," I didn't look at Edward. "I'll get him off." I started to pull on Jake again.

"You were lying." Edward's breath grazed my neck. My body stiffened and I stopped pulling on Jake. "You're absurd to think for a minute that you could possibly look decent in those clothes." His hands wrapped around my waist and his teeth grabbed the bottom of my ear.

A huge blush was on my face and the only thing that I could think about was Edward's hands on my waist and his teeth nibbling on my earlobe. "I look like a blue pixie stick." I finally admitted.

Edward laughed. His lips left my ear and he started to brush them against my neck. "I like pixie sticks…and blue is my favorite color."

I started to giggle. "Really?" I asked looking at him.

"Really." Edward chuckled. A huge grin formed across his face.

Edward twisted his head to the side and I closed my eyes. His lips brushed against mine and I pushed my lips closer to his. His hand left my waist and he held my cheek. I waited for him to press my cheek, telling me to move my head, but he didn't. He pulled away and turned toward his bed.

"If you get off my bed I'll stop kissing her."He told whatever he was staring at. I turned to what he was looking. Jake, who I had forgotten about, was lying on his stomach, growling at Edward.

I rolled my eyes and was about to step away from Edward but he tightened his grip on my waist and pushed me towards his chest. His eyes didn't leave Jacob.

"I'll kiss her again." He warned.

Jacob got onto his feet and jumped off the bed. His eyes didn't leave Edward as he sulked into a corner. Edward turned towards me, a huge smile across his perfect face.

"I got him off the bed." He boasted.

I shook my head and stepped out of his grip and walked to my side of the bed. "I could've gotten him off the bed. You just didn't give me a chance." I pulled the covers to his bed and crawled into it. It was like lying on clouds.

"You had me convinced." Edward smiled at me before taking off his shirt and pulling down his pants. I looked the other way as he crawled into bed with me. I knew that he liked to sleep in his boxers but it still made me feel slightly uncomfortable.

"You're not going to take a shower?" I asked when he had covered himself in the comforter.

Edward shook his head. "No, I took one at the hospital."

My jaw dropped. "You're kidding?" I asked. He shook his head. "I hate you." I rolled over so I wasn't looking at him. I was trying to be playful. I think it worked because Edward laughed and wrapped his arms around my waist. His nose was buried into the side of my neck.

"Are you jealous?" He asked.

I turned toward him and nodded. "Yes! You got to take a shower. I had to scoop out ice cream and explain to Charlie why we couldn't get a divorce, while you were taking a shower. That is not fair."

Edward kissed my cheek. "You're so cute when you're jealous." His breath brushed against my neck, making every hair on my body stand up.

Jake started to growl. Edward pulled his head away from me but didn't remove his hands from my waist.

"I haven't even kissed her yet." Edward yelled at him.

Jake started to bark. Edward pulled his hands away from my waist and scooted over so we weren't as close; he made sure to keep his hands in the air.

"Happy now?" He asked for Jake's approval.

Jake didn't say anything.

I raised an eyebrow at Edward. He was acting like Jake was a police officer or something.

"I feel like your dad is watching us," Edward admitted, "except in a dog's body. It's kind of eerie."

I giggled. "I'm really sorry about Jake. But you're being really sweet about this." I smiled at him.

He shrugged. "It's the least I can do." He seemed hesitant about saying something. "I really want to turn off the light but I'm afraid that Jake might bite my leg off if I leave the bed."

I started to laugh. "I'll get the light then." I crawled out of bed and walked across the room to turn off the light. Then I walked awkwardly back towards the bed. It was weird walking in the dark in an unfamiliar room. But I was able to find the bed without too hurting myself.

I crawled back into the sheets and snuggled into my pillow.

"Goodnight Edward." I whispered sleepily. "Goodnight Jake."

"Goodnight Bella." Edward replied. "Goodnight…dog."

I rolled my eyes but didn't say anything. Edward was being sweet about not kicking Jake out, so I let him get away with calling Jake a dog.

I was on the verge of falling asleep when a weird smell caught my attention. My nose scrunched up and I threw my hands over my nostrils. "Ew!" I screamed. "Jake that is disgusting." I was tempted to throw my pillow at him.

"I knew I should've given him that dog a hot dog." Edward voiced his distaste about Jake's silent, but deadly, fart.

There was a low snort that was coming from the corner of the room where Jake was. I think Jake was laughing at us…

End Chapter.

A/N: So, a couple of things to talk about. Jake isn't going anywhere. Don't tell me to write him out of my story. I won't. He's there for comic relief, that's all. You can hate him as much as you want but he's not going anywhere. Second, I don't think Edward and Bella moved too fast in this chapter. It's just kissing. They're married. They're also trying to make it work and it's not like they're having sex and telling each other that they're in love. Right now they're kind of just taking it one step at a time and I don't see anything wrong with kissing. As for the sex, that's going to take time. I'm not the type of person that can have my characters rush relationships (sorry) when I feel like they've known each other long enough to have sex, they'll have sex. You have to remember they just met! Married or not, they're not the type of people to rush into sex, that's how they ended up in this situation, remember? Last but not least. Tell me your favorite Chuck Norris fact. I love Chuck Norris facts and I want to hear your favorites. Mine is "Chuck Norris doesn't believe in evolution, he decides which animals live or die." So, send me a review, I would love you forever. Especially, since this is a long and fluffy chapter.