"You're the one who set us up, why are you acting like a little shit about this?"

Mina rolled her eyes and flopped dramatically against the stained beige upholstery of the rickety couch. "I didn't 'set you up,' Ruka. I asked her to go to a dinner with you. A one-time gig. I never thought it would go this far!"

"Why?!" The hurt was etched in her face. "Because someone like her could never be interested in a piece of trash like me?"

Mina pulled on the roots of her hair and growled. "You are not a piece of trash. She is! She doesn't deserve someone nice like you. I thought she wouldn't see you again. She's a bitch, she's a cold, rich, mean bitch, and she's going to hurt you so bad. So bad."

Haruka shook her head and smiled softly at Mina, putting her hand on her shoulder in her affectionate sisterly way. "Mina, no, it's not like that. She really cares about me." She shrugged and her smile grew wider. "I think she might even love me."

Mina's face fell. Her voice was subdued, and a little sad. "Oh, Haruka." She sighed heavily. "I don't think she knows how to love. I think she knows how to do coke, and be disaffected, and play her stupid violin. And speak French, which is how we got into this whole stupid mess, me and my big fucking mouth."

"You just don't know her. The real her."

Mina's temper flared. "She's a human! You're a mermaid!" She laid her hands on Haruka's shoulders. "I love you, you starry-eyed idiot. But. Rich people are not like us, Ruka. She has no idea what it's like to work, she has no idea what it's like to want, she spends her whole life playing a part, and you don't fit that! You never will! And she can't love you the way you are, because it's beyond her." Her eyes narrowed. "And not because there's anything wrong with you, so get that shit out of your head. You're a great person, and she'd be lucky to have you, but she'd rather have some gold-plated asshole who quotes Foucault."

Haruka pulled away from her. "You're wrong. She spends a lot of time with me, and she showed me her paintings, and she, she holds me, sometimes, when I stay."

"Yeah. She spends a lot of time with you. Alone. In her apartment. Where no one can see you."

Haruka was stilled by the accusation, unable to come up with a defense. "I love her."

"I know. It breaks my heart." Mina scooted closer to Haruka. "You're the last person on Earth I'd want to hurt. I'm sorry for getting you into this."

"No." Haruka's brow furrowed "She's not like that. Can't you ever just let me have something nice?"

Mina stood up. "Fine. Have it your way. Do me a fucking favor, though. Tomorrow, when you're in your little blue jumpsuit with your name lovingly embroidered on the tag, walk up to her when she's with her little friends. See what happens. If I'm wrong, I'll apologize to her stupid Crème de la Mer covered face."

"Fine!"

"Fine!" Mina stood in the tiny living room for a moment. "Okay, I'm storming off to your bedroom, I guess." She picked up her bag and slammed the door as hard as she could.

Haruka sighed, pulled down Mina's murphy bed from the wall, and closed her eyes, as the train passing by the apartment rocked her to sleep.

The beginning dullness of late fall should have been her first clue.

"Hey there!" She smiled the crooked smile Michiru loved so well. Michiru's eyes darted as she looked over at her friends. Haruka had never approached her on campus. She worked in the science building, what was she even doing here?

Jessica looked up at Haruka. "Oh, may we help you with something?"

Haruka drew back a touch. "Just—saying hi to Michiru. We—"

Our lives are decided by moments. Each word from our mouths is the switching of a track from one destination to the other, towards an unknown end. In this moment, all the possibilities of Michiru's life laid out in front of her, she discovered her own weakness =, laid bare before the world.

"I tutor her ward in French." Michiru interrupted. "Mina's doing very well, I expect she'll make very fine marks on the final. You should encourage her to study the superlative." She smiled her beauty queen smile. "It's wonderful for you to be so involved with her education."

Haruka stared down at the table and swallowed hard, shame coming to her face. "Yes. Uh, I'm glad she's doing good."

"Well." Ashley piped up. "You're glad she's doing well."

"Yeah." Haruka nodded. "Thanks." She scratched behind her ear and walked away quickly, shoulders slumped.

For the first time she could remember, Michiru felt guilty. It felt swallowing a fireball, burning her heart like a pig on a spit, shame dripping into the pit of her stomach and sizzling there. Her friends laughed, joking about how familiar staff could be at colleges.

"Well," Jessica put a hand to her cheek, playfully, "this wouldn't happen if you didn't tutor the charity cases."

Ashley shook her head. "You know we need service history if we're ever going to end up on any of the major boards. I'm sure Michiru's already aiming to get on the MET."

Their words came like voices underwater, loud and muffled all at once. Haruka had done nothing but show her kindness. Consideration. She never spoke of influences or movements when she looked at Michiru's paintings, never offered critique. She simply told her what she loved about each piece, gushed over her talent. It was the same with the violin, she showered Michiru with detailed appreciation, as if any violinist who would come after or who had come before was irrelevant. She saw Michiru. She remembered things about her, her favorite flowers, what movies she liked, the way she loved intricate patterns of light cast in shadows, lavishing on her in attention and care where others had thrown only wealth, was gentle where others were genteel.

She was the first real thing Michiru had ever had, and in an instant Michiru had traded her for the lie.

She casually asked Jessica if she had any Oxycontin to spare. She hadn't been calling her dealer lately.

Mina walked into the apartment and moved to hang up her jacket. She stopped for a moment. Haruka' jacket was hung up in its usual place, but it was only 4 o clock. She couldn't remember the last time Haruka had taken sick leave, she must be really…and then it hit her.

She knocked on Haruka's door. "Ruka? Can I come in?"

The reply was muffled. "Sure."

She opened the door to the darkened room and peeked in. Haruka lay on the bed, curled up on her side, facing the small window. The faded plaid blanket was pulled up to her chin, a single pillow resting under her head as she lay on top of the covers, her shoes not even removed.

Mina sighed. "I'm sorry, buddy."

"She acted like she didn't even know me."

Mina sat at the edge of the bed and put her hand on Haruka's shoulder. "I mean, I'm glad you found out now rather than later. I should kick her snooty ass." She kneaded her thumb into Haruka's shoulderblade.

Haruka propped herself up on her elbow, still looking at the wall. "You know, I go to that job every day, and I always think, 'You know, I'm part of what makes this whole thing possible, this great, historical institution.' But you know what? None of the kids there care. They don't even know my name."

"I care."

Haruka sighed and laid on her back, looking up at the ceiling. "I know. I'm being all dramatic. It just…hurt."

Mina sat cross-legged by her side. "I should have known." She put a hand on her chin and leaned forward. "I should have known when I made her go on that date with you."

Haruka stopped. "What?"

"I should have known."

Haruka sat up and looked straight at Mina. "You forced her to go on a date with me?"

"I mean, just, kinda?" Mina felt suddenly ill at ease.

Haruka leapt to her feet, throwing the blanket down on the ground. "You just told me you were gonna ask her!"

Mina geticulated wildly. "I did! Just with…incentive. I mean, she owed me a favor and I couldn't just squander it."

Haruka buried her face in her hands. "She never even wanted to go out with me, God, I'm such an idiot." She looked over at Mina, shaking her head. "How could you?" She pulled at her hair, bit her lip, and stormed out to the little living space, her face blushing with embarrassment and rage.

Mina followed after her. "I was just getting you a date! God, Haruka!"

Haruka whirled around and faced her, her voice loud and angry. "I have feelings, Mina! Didn't you think about how I'd feel, knowing she never liked me?"

Mina shrugged uncomfortably. "Well, you got to bang a rich hot chick, so—"

"I'm embarrassed!" Her voice echoed through the tiny apartment, her eyes filled with tears. "You set me up. Can't you see that? If I'd known she didn't want to go out with me…"

Mina shook her head. "It's not my fault Michiru's a bitch. I never asked you to fall in love with her. Listen—"

Mina was silenced by a yell of anger and frustration, Haruka's fist flying into the wall with a heavy thud. They stood in silence, Haruka cradling her hand, her eyes closed, a tear dripping down her cheek.

"Just stop." Her voice was calm now. "Stop." She picked up her coat and threw it on roughly, heading toward the door.

"Ruka—"

"Mina, do me a favor." She paused at the doorway. "Don't talk to me for a while."

Haruka skipped down the stairs quickly, pushing open the heavy door to the apartment building and heading out into the night. She walked hurriedly down the darkened streets, trying to escape from her anger and pain. Mina had blackmailed Michiru to even see her. Michiru had never considered Haruka anything at all. She'd been a toy, a plaything. And Mina. How could she? After all Haruka had tried to do, she'd treated her like she was a sitcom plot point, not a person. Mina, at least, should know better. She knew how sensitive Haruka was.

Ugh, it sickened her to say that. How sensitive she was. She hated that about herself, everything in the world felt so deep and so lasting, her nerves lying just below the surface. Happiness and sadness touched her heart equally, she relished in affection and kind words and all the things girls like her weren't supposed to need.

And she tried so hard to be deserving.

She broke into a run, her long legs carrying her down the block and further into the night, the steady pound of her heart and force of her breath clarifying her mind.

No. She was deserving. She worked hard, she was good at her job, she took care of herself and that tiny blonde ingrate. She was kind to others. She gave affection and kind words. She deserved them just as much as any other person. She deserved to be recognized. She deserved love.

She ran.

There was a knock at Michiru's door, and she looked up from the couch. A half-empty bottle of wine sat in front of her, a line of coke meted out for later, a spate of prescription drugs still running through her system. It had been a mortifying day, having Haruka approach her at school, and she deserved to unwind.

How embarrassing, to have Haruka think she could approach her like that at school. They hadn't discussed that. In her uniform, no less. A mop in hand. Had her friends known? Had they seen the shame and guilt In her face, and guessed as to her private longing? If Haruka had simply had more discretion, she would happily help her with expenses. Perhaps she would bring up such a thing to Haruka in a few days' time, once she had cooled off.

She might not even be mad. She might have realized the error of her ways.

Michiru walked toward the door, and opened it, not even looking up, expecting Haruka to be there, in her addled mind. This notion was quickly quelled by a swift blow to the face.

Michiru reeled back inside, pursued by a blonde whirl of fury. Mina grabbed her arm and pulled her back, Michiru shoving at her ineffectually and calling at her to stop. Mina threw her up against the wall, where she slid to the floor.

Mina stood in the middle of the room, scowling, and looked down at her hand. "Ow! God, punching someone in the face hurts."

Michiru delicately touched her cheek, already beginning to swell. She looked up at Mina angrily.

Mina leaned over her, pointing aggressively. "Tell me you don't deserve it. Tell me."

Michiru offered no argument in her defense, simply stood up and walked into the kitchen as Mina's eyes followed her. She pulled a wine glass out of the cabinet. "May I interest you in a glass?"

Mina dropped her fist, confused. "Is it poison?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Mina." She poured two glasses a handed her one. "Let us discuss my many sins."

Mina sat down on the couch, Michiru at the other end. They stared at each other for moment, silent.

Michiru sipped her wine. "Have you ever heard the legend of the frog and the scorpion?"

"No." Mina still stared at her glass, afraid to take a sip.

Michiru did not pause. "A scorpion once asked a frog to carry him across a river. The frog was frightened, saying that he was afraid the scorpion would sting him. The scorpion tells him not to be afraid—if he stings the frog, they will both drown. Thus assured, the frog agrees. They are halfway across the river when the scorpion stings the frog. Feeling the poison take over his body, the frog asks before he dies, 'Why would you do such a thing?'"

Michiru stopped to snort the line of cocaine, Mina still staring at her drink.

She leaned back onto the couch, and smiled coldly at Mina. "And the scorpion says, 'You knew what I was when we began. It is my nature.'"

"So you're saying Haruka's the frog?"

Michiru thought for a moment, her voice picking up speed. "No, perhaps you're right. It's an imperfect allegory. It would be as if you had placed the scorpion on the frog's back, knowing what it was."

Mina threw herself up from the couch. "Why is everyone trying to blame me for this?"

"Who blackmailed me into our first date? Who knew the intimate details of my very nature, and Haruka's, and still thought it wise?" She paused, a moment of realization coming over her. "Who talked Haruka into approaching me in the art building? You have been the engineer of your own nightmare, Mina. Of Haruka's nightmare."

"Yeah, you're totally innocent and blameless in this, you're not a repressed bitch at all." She slammed down the glass of wine.

"I am nothing other than what I have always been. Girls like me don't marry girls like Haruka." She shrugged. "It was doomed to come to a bad end." Her voice was faraway for a moment. "Just because Haruka believed I was something else, does not make it so."

"Girls like you don't deserve girls like Haruka. You're a fucking snake. A monster." She spat the words.

Michiru tipped her hand. "Perhaps." She crossed one leg over the other. "But isn't it funny how its everyone's fault but yours?"

Mina stormed out of the apartment, and Michiru set up another line.

Mina strolled slowly back home, her heart heavy. She would never have intentionally hurt Haruka. Haruka was all she had, all she'd ever had for years. But, she supposed, her intention didn't really matter in this case. She had deeply wounded Haruka.

It was at this moment that she began to remember why Haruka didn't date much. Too soft, too attached. She needed to be more like Mina, at least to Mina's mind. You don't have to think of moving in together with everyone you sleep with. She slowly tromped up the stairs to the apartment, a baby crying in one of the apartments next door, echoing througghhe hall.

She opened the door, tossing her keys on the table. Haruka sat on the couch, the TV playing an old movie about love and Nazis or something in that vein. Mina had no time for them, but Haruka loved those schlocky old pieces of work.

Haruka turned to face her, swinging her arm over the couch. "Mina, I'm sorry if I scared you, I'd never hit you or anything, I just got so upset—"

"Oh God, I know you wouldn't hit me, you big dork." She rolled her eyes and flopped down on the couch next to her. Haruka's knuckles were bandaged, her hand set gingerly in her lap. "You hurt yourself bad?"

Haruka shook her head. "Only what I'm owed."

Mina fiddled with her shoelace. "Ruka, I need to apologize to you." She sighed heavily. "I shouldn't have done that."

Haruka stared at the TV. "I wouldn't have gone out with her if I'd known, you know."

"I know." She set her hand on Haruka's knee. "I was trying to do something nice for you. And, probably," She leaned back on the couch, defeated. "I wanted to think about snobby little Michiru out on the town with you."

"I'm not a punishment, Mina." Her voice was flat.

"I know. I am a world-class shit. It's okay if you're mad at me forever. Seems reasonable."

Haruka looked down at her hand, running her finger over her knuckles. "Not forever. Maybe just the rest of our lives."

Mina laughed darkly. "That's fine."

They sat watching the silver and grey of the film for a few moments before Mina interrupted again.

"I do love you, Haruka."

Haruka patted her arm. "I know. You're just a dipshit." She looked at Mina's hand. "You punch a wall too?"

"May as well have been."

The next day, Mina quietly dropped her French tutor.