Seven
Something good outta something shit… and then back to shit again.

Kairi slurps down her chocolate McDonald's milkshake slowly, making a show out of the way her lips fit perfectly around the straw. It kind of looks like she's giving it head, much to my disgust. Why I chose to sit across from her I don't even know. I could've sat a completely different table. Me, on the other hand—I drink my vanilla milkshake quickly, purposely trying to give myself brain freeze.

It feels cool. So sue me.

When the shock hits my gums, I scream. "Holy fucking shit out a donkey's ass on a Cadillac in summer of sixty fucking four! SHIT!" I press my thumb to the roof of my mouth. People stare.

Kairi, embarrassed, hangs her head. Her hair blankets her face. "Shut up Nam. People are staring!"

I snort. "You think I don't know that?" My phone vibrates in my pocket. I reach in and pull it out. A text from Axel is waiting for me. "Axel?" I wonder aloud, hitting VIEW.

Hey girrrl what's good? ;P

Ignoring Kairi's complaining about my inappropriate public behavior, I respond to my pal.

Hangin with Kairi, being bored out my ass, n all that good stuff. :P cool, right? What up with you?

"You know what your problem is, Nam?" Kairi asks pointing one of her perfectly done-up nails directly at my nose. I lean back a little and slap her fingers away. "You're disgustingly crass. You could probably get a boyfriend if you weren't so… gross…"

I roll my eyes. "Do I look like I care whether I'm crass or gross or whatever? Because honestly Kairi, I don't. I don't care."

"And that's the exact attitude that will be your downfall, dear sister of mine." Kairi slams her hand down on the table. She snaps her fingers and claps once, too.

Phone buzzes. I look down at my newest Axel text.

Basketball with Rox then this party tonight that you are now cordially invited to ;)
But you have to bring Kairi, too. :|

I groan at the message.

"Excuse me, Nams. I am trying to help you here," Kairi sneers, waving her drink around like she knows where it's at.

She don't know where it's it. I know she don't know where it's at. I'm like that bitch from Bad Girls Club. I run LA! Maybe not LA, but… I run Cleveland! Wait, I can run Lower Akron!

Fuck yeah, I run LA!

I respond to Axel, trying to ignore Kairi's snarky comment.

…ew…you sure you want me to bring It along?

And within the next ten seconds I have a light-speed response leaving me wondering, "How does he do that?" quietly aloud.

"What was that?" Kairi asks, trying to look over the edge of the table to see my phone. I hide it deeper between my legs so she won't want to look.

Wasn't my place to say. Personally i wouldnt touch her with a ten foot pole. .

I snort. Funny, Axel—neither would I. I have to though because I'm related to her. Somehow. By some mystical force of Hell that wants me to suffer.

Lawl. I can see why. Ok we'll be there.

"Come on, tell me!" Kairi whines.

"Will you just shut up?" I snap.

She looks taken aback and I don't care one bit.

I get another text from Axel. It's typed all seriously.

Look hot, but not too hot. I wouldn't want someone to steal my Nami-time ;)

And then I start blushing. Kairi starts whining again. I glare at her. "Will you just leave me alone? Please? I'm trying to have a conversation with someone."

"So am I, but you're completely ignoring me!" she exasperates, setting her cup on the table. She clenches her fist. "Nami this isn't fair. You don't even talk to me at all anymore. What happened to us?"

I shake my head at her and feel my heart sink. There is nothing I can say to her. I grab my own vanilla milkshake and rise to my feet. "We're going to a party tonight at some local dude's house. Axel will text you the address." I head off toward the exit of McDonalds.

Kairi squeals after me, "Wait, where… why are you going? How will you get home?"

I don't tell her I hate her being the favorite child.

I don't tell her I hate being the outcast.

I don't tell her that I hate what she's become since she hit puberty.

My heart squeezes. We're supposed to be sisters… But to me you're nothing more than a ghost—a ghost of my sister. I hold on to my milkshake tighter, crinkling the cup a little.

"Somewhere," I ambiguously tell her, pushing the door open. "I took my bike, remember?" I kick the glass open the rest of the way and walk outside into the summer heat.

TO: Axel, Roxas

hey guys! guess who's taking you guys out before the game? me! meet me at my uncle's house, okii? i got plans for you two ;)

-(NC)-

The look on Axel and Roxas' faces are priceless when we arrive at the karaoke bar in the center of Middleburg Heights. Their jaws are slack, their eyes are wide, and Axel looks scared shitless.

"Karaoke…" they muse in fear aloud at the same time.

I nod proudly. "Yep. You, me, Dupree, and karaoke."

"You have got to be kidding me," Roxas groans, hanging his head.

I shake my head. "Nope. And you guys have to sing too."

Roxas repeats, louder and whinier, "You have got to be kidding me."

I shake my head again and pat him on the back. "Nope. No jokes here. It's us, the mike, and a hundred and twenty seven other people."

Axel wraps an arm around my shoulder and slings one around Roxas'. "Come on, kiddo. Don't be such a spoil sport. You know how to siiing! This should be a good male-and-Nams bonding experience!"

Oh buddy you have no idea.

-(NC)-

Fifteen minutes after we get there I'm wasted.

Sixteen minutes after we get there we've already heard a fat guy belt out Dude Looks Like A Lady, a familiar-looking spunky teenage girly-boy sing Hurricane Streets, and some faggot attempting to rap Not Afraid by Eminem. Dude. No one shows up Eminem.

NO ONE.

AT ALL.

EVER.

I decide to show everyone up in the midst of my drunkenness. I mean, I can sing. I actually have a damn good voice but I'm going to waste it on an A Day To Remember song from For Those Who Have Heart called Monument. It's a song that's really personal to me. It's almost like the song that tells my life story. Or it tells about how I feel constantly.

And I can't help but love Ohio for having a karaoke bar with ADTR songs available.

I grab the microphone, ruffle my hair, and set my hat on the barstool behind me. I push the chair away and bring the microphone to my lips. Everyone is staring at me. And you know what? I'm not nervous at all. I don't get stage fright. I don't care that I'm preforming in front of Roxas; I preform in plays before my eight-hundred population high school as the star so a hundred-something people isn't going to bother me. I smile and find myself moving to the music as it starts playing.

Like the pro I am I lower my voice a little in an effortless, smooth way so I sound a little more like a guy so I can sing, "It's Monday morning and I would kill for a chance to drive. Get so far away from here with you my dear that I'll never leave your side. Nobody knows the troubles I've seen in a van, on a soapbox for the world to see."

I hold the last note a little long, hitch a breath, and continue. "Miles away and I wish this didn't mean so much to me to be a monument for the rest of them. Miles away and I wish this didn't mean so much to me to be a monument for the rest of them. We're getting older. I've started to fear for my life! Is this the way that it should be? This whole thing's riding on me. It's been a long road so far—with nowhere to turn. There's no looking back from here." I go deep within my throat to pull out a scream just like the band's lead singer would pull so I can keep the song sounding good. "No more dwelling on my fears! Miles away and I wish this didn't mean so much to me to be a monument for the rest of them. Miles away and I wish this didn't mean so much to me to be a monument for the rest of them." As the bridge kicks in, I turn it down a little and take in the people watching me. Most of them are bobbing their heads along. Some of them that look strangely familiar are head banging and dancing like dumbasses.

So I finish the final bridge and kick into the breakdown. I do another deep, throaty, bellowing growl sound, trying to mimic the way guys do it. Not a lot of girls can do this, but I can.

It's a skill.

"And I'll scream so loud that everyone in this place will hear every word I say 'cause this is MY time. This is MY time to shine. Let nothing stand in our way. Twenty bucks says you'll remember me when you see me on your TV screen. It may be the first time, but it won't be the last time."

I finish by kicking over the barstool, sending my hat flying. But I'm so drunk right now I reeeally don't care. How I pulled the ADTR out of my ass I don't even know. My head is pounding and I'm wasted and I'm just having a huge fucking blast.

I stumble off the stage, falling into Roxas' arms. He's waiting for me, staring at me with these admiring eyes and I could just explode with the way he's looking at me. I point to my hat and mutter something about wanting it. And someone else – probably Axel – puts it back on my head. His hands brush through my hair once in a strangely gentle… tender way? Axel? I mean, WTF man?

I sit down on the squishy booth and throw my head back, laughing like a total Tool. "Oh my gawd that was sooooo much fun! Can I go again?"

Axel pats me on the head and slides in next to me. "No, I don't think you should Nami. That might be a bad idea."

"But whyyyy?" I whine, kicking my feet like a toddler. Axel throws one of his legs over mine, using me as a leg rest. "Humph." I look away and snort, grumbling about him being a party pooper.

I notice now that Roxas is up there now. And he's singing… Jesse McCartney? Why the hell Jesse McCartney? And why the hell Beautiful Soul? The song is pretty and all but I think that it doesn't—

Holy shit.

Holy mother of shit.

Holy mother of Jesus Christ's shit.

Roxas opens his mouth to sing and he sounds exactly. Like. Jesse. Fucking. McCartney.

Damn. What'd he drink to make his voice do that?

I nudge Axel. "Dude, since when did he sound just like Jesse McCartney?" I ask, dazed. He sounds just like him. Oh my sugar shiz.

Axel rubs his head and sighs. "Uh… Puberty?" he guesses, shrugging. "I dunno. He just does."

I nod. That's pretty hot…

At the end of the song I'm halfway to tears from how silky Roxas' singing is. I never pegged him for a singer. But we all have secrets, huh? That's just a little more than shocking coming from a basketball-playing player like him. And you know the best part? He sounds just like Jesse. Fucking. McCartney. Now that I think about it his voice does sound identical to Jesse's too. And they both have blonde hair. Whoa. Freaky.

At the end of the song, I'm even closer to tears because some girl walks up and kisses him. I can't see her face because she has dark red hair that hides it. She's wearing too-short shorts, flip-flops, and a really loose, flowing camisole. And you know the worst part?

He kisses her back. He wraps his arms around her and kisses her like she's some sort of goddess.

You know what it was like watching the Twin Towers go down on nine-eleven-o-one?

Watching me crash from seeing that is far more devastating. It's like that times three. I know I've seen him go through girlfriends before and I've seen him kiss a girl before. But this? This just kills. This just tears my heart into shreds and stomps on the pieces.

Anyone have a duck I can kick in the balls?

Tears well up in my eyes. I hang my head and tilt my hat over my face. I bite my lower lip; tell myself I'm not going to cry. I'm better than this. Besides, last week I was still telling myself that I didn't like him anymore. Boy was I ever wrong. I was so wrong. I'm just going to sit in my wrongness and feel wrong about how wrong I was.

I gently push Axel's leg off my lap and pull my knees up to my chest, holding onto them, hiding my face. I keep repeating in my mind that I won't cry- that I'm better than this. Yet it feels like someone just tore my heart out. Over these past few days I've felt closer to Roxas Colton than I ever thought I would have a chance to be and now here he is, crushing my hopes. I doubt he even knew that I felt this way still. One of these days I'm going to punch him so hard in the face his teeth will end up Sandusky.

Do you know where Sandusky is?

It's an hour away—an hour and forty minutes with Cedar Point traffic. That's where he deserves to be kicked to. He deserves to have his ass kicked into next week for this. He deserves to be hurt. Badly.

Too bad I could never do that because I'll always like him. He's my first love. I have to have a soft spot for him.

God fucking damn you, Roxas Colton. I hate you. I hate you so much it hurts.

"Naminé..?" Axel calls out to me quietly. I hardly hear him over my drunken state, rage, and heartbreak. All I can hear is my heart shattering into pieces. "Naminé, are you okay?"

"Of course I'm not okay!" I hiss rather loudly, bashing my head against the seatback. "That little whore just… GAH. I need to kick a duck in the balls. Like, now."

Axel suddenly takes one of my hands in his own. He uses his free hand to turn me to face him. His eyes flash with sadness. Why?

"Whatsa matter?" I ask him, tilting my head curiously and squeezing his hand.

"Do you want to kick the duck in the balls because that duck is you?" he asks.

I raise an eyebrow. What's he getting at..?

"The duck never did anything wrong. It just lived its life. And you want to go along and kick it for no reason. Have you ever thought you want to kick the duck because you're just like it? You live your life, waddling along, but someone just always comes along and kicks you." He is dead serious as he says this and usually I would be laughing hysterically. But something about right now… right here? It feels… right. And it feels proper that he would analyze me like this.

And now I feel like someone's torn me open and read me like a book.

Jade eyes peer into my soul, reaching out to it, holding its hand, inviting it to dance to the very good rendition of (You Want to) Make a Memory by Bon Jovi being sung in the background by an attractive male in his mid-to-late twenties.

"You're telling me I want to suffer?" I question Axel, scooting slightly closer to him, timidly reaching toward his cheek. I lightly brush over the smooth skin with shivering fingers. I push a few of his red spikes back. I wonder why he keeps his hair like this. It's off-putting. He could be even more attractive if he did something about this mess.

I then realize I was just thinking about how hot Axel is—and it's not just the color of his hair.

Am I starting to like him…? Like, like him like him?

"No… You just want someone to suffer with you because it's the only way you can think of to not be alone." He leans closer to me and whispers in my ear with cold, steady breaths, "You're not alone."

I swivel my head a little, trying to see his face. I realize just how close we are. Our noses are nearly touching. His eyes can't decide whether to stare into mine or glance down at my lips so they do both rather impulsively. My heartbeat slows down to a steady, comforting, controllable pace. Two heavy pairs of lids close as both of us find ourselves leaning in closer ever so slowly, careful as not to shatter the strange serenity we seem to have found. And I expect to feel nothing when he presses his surprisingly soft lips against my own.

I expect wrong. So very wrong. In my head I try to wallow about my wrongness but I'm too busy attempting a suppression of my urge to squeal like a teenage girl that just got her first kiss. What do I feel? I feel a certain… warmth. Yeah, that's it—it's like I've been sitting in an igloo and someone finally lit a fire and it's quickly warming me up into a reasonable temperature at which I won't get hypothermia. I don't feel wasted anymore. I don't feel upset. I feel… I feel… God, what's the word for this? I've never felt it before. I think I feel… special. I feel like someone wants me. I don't feel so useless and worthless and miserable. All that sadness has faded away in a matter of moments.

Fuck. If I'd known kissing made you feel this good I would've become a slut a long time ago.

I pull back from Axel hesitantly. I'm not really sure what to do now because I've never kissed anyone. I look shyly into Axel's eyes. Their smile matches the one on his lips perfectly only they hint at something slightly more… longing maybe? No… it's more pleasant than that. It's… content? Yes… content sounds right.

I flinch the slightest bit away and he chuckles, kissing my cheek. I blush bright pink and I know it because I memorized how hot my cheeks get when I blush at certain levels. I find myself smiling still though.

"I've waited way too long to do that," Axel tells me, not letting go of my hand. He smiles this adorably nervous smile.

"Way too long?" I wonder.

"Yup."

"How long is too long?"

"Um… the last day of sixth grade?"

I choke on my breath, cough a little. I look at him like, whaaa?

"Yes," he says, nodding. "During the class picture shoot I remember exactly how four people ended up sitting—it was me, Roxas, you, and Xion. I think that Anastasia girl was on the other side of her. Anyway, I remember Roxas asking about you moving and you said that you were moving to New Hampshire. I was so upset when I heard that… I had liked you for like, the whole year and you were moving." He sighs.

I'm still about to puke from the confession that I definitely did not expect.

"I was sad, y'know? No one likes it when the person they like leaves." He smiles sadly.

I blink. "You realize I was ugly in middle school, right?"

He shakes his head. "In no ways were you. In fact, when I caught glimpses of you over summers when you visited here I couldn't believe it was possible for you to get prettier."

I blush. "T-thanks… I don't agree, but…"

He shakes his head again and smiles, more playfully than not. "You don't have to."

"Oh hi, guys!"

…The voice of the devil? Satan is here? What the hell?

I look over and see Kairi snuggled up in the arm Roxas has around her. My jaw drops.

Holy.

Fucking.

Shit.

And at this moment I decide that Kairi is going to die.

Oh yeah. Again, less funny than usual. But more ridiculous chapters are a little later. I even have a cheer for Roxas during a basketball game! :D
1-2-3-4! Somebody please close the damn door!
5-6-7-8! Roxy's tryin ta masturbate!
:3
So what'd you think of this chapter, kiddos? -pushes glassees down nose- How did it make you feel...?

Scotty