Yay for me forgetting to give any idea at all where the last chapter fit in timewise. It's about halfway through the missing year. This one is the day after the first chapter. Since I have it written, I figured I might as well put this up.
Also, THANK YOU SO MUCH to anyone that's ever reviewed. It makes my day and makes me feel like someone is actually reading what I write. I really really appreciate it.
Also, to shamelessly self-promote, my tumblr is regaldearie. I promise I'm a very nice person with a moderately interesting blog.
He showed up to her room as he usually did at that time. She was sitting in front of her mirror and didn't seem to hear his approach. He cleared his throat to get her attention.
"I uh… just wanted to apologize if what I said yesterday made you uncomfortable."
That wasn't what he really wanted to say. He wanted to tell her despite what she thought he had truly fallen for her. He wanted to ask her if there was a chance she had any feelings at all for him. And he was most certainly not sorry for confessing his feelings, because he couldn't bear to keep them to himself any longer.
But he had come to the conclusion that love didn't do anything for Regina. At least not his love. She didn't want it. And couldn't stand losing her. He needed something from her, even if it wasn't quite what he wanted. He would take any scrap she offered.
She stood up and walked until she was standing in front of him
"It never happened," she replied plainly, "Nothing's changed."
As far as she was concerned, she could overlook his mistake and continue their relationship as long as they could pretend he had never said a thing.
Relief spread through his entire body. The tension he didn't notice he'd been holding in his muscles was gone and he felt himself relax.
He went to kiss her, but she put her hands on his chest to stop him.
"Not that. Lips are too…"
Intimate. That was the word she wasn't saying, he realized. She didn't want anything resembling affection.
It wasn't her only rule. Over the next few weeks, he noticed that she would never quite meet his eyes. It was fine by him. When he couldn't see the way she looked at him, he could indulge in the fantasy that she felt the same way he did. And she could indulge in her own fantasy that he didn't care for her at all.
Since her rules seemed to bar him from her face, he took advantage of every other inch of skin. Any marks he left were only fair. If he was forced to carry her around every second of the day she should have to carry him with her as well. He was concerned the first time he left a bruise. But over the next few days he noticed her constantly rubbing it with a slight smile. She never wanted his gentle touch. There was something in her that enjoyed having a constant reminder on her skin that it wasn't.
But as the weeks went on, it became difficult for Robin to deny how strong his feelings were. He hated that she pulled away. She wouldn't even say his name, reverting back to calling him a thief. They used to have conversations and make sarcastic comments to each other. Now she barely said two words to him. He missed that connection. He missed the ease they used to have with each other. Now there was only tension.
Weeks before she wouldn't be so fast to kick him out of her bed without a word. He had never stayed excessively long, but now she expected him to be gone in seconds. It felt like a transaction. With the complete lack of connection to one another, he could hardly tell that it was Regina he was with and not some nameless woman. He imagined it was the same for her, and that hurt him. He suspected that she probably preferred that, which only intensified the pain. He wanted her and her alone.
Some days it was torture. He was physically satisfied but emotionally depleted. He was starting to think having nothing was preferable to what he had with Regina now. But he held out the tiniest shred of hope that one day she might return his affections. As they say, hope is the worst of all evils for it prolongs the torment of man. And Robin was indeed tormented by his love.
After two months he reached his breaking point. He was on his way to see Regina, and it hit him that she was never going to love him. And that it was something he was no longer content with. He has no idea what spurred this realization, but it was somewhat of a relief. He returned to his room and braced himself: tomorrow it would end.
