Title: If You Ever Have Need

Fandom: Merlin

Rating: T

Warnings: Slight violence and mild language. No beta. All mistakes are my own

Pairings: Mostly Merlin/Arthur friendship. Some mentions of Arthur/Gwen romance. No Slash

Spoilers: Through the end of season 2

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or ideas. I just like to play with them. (Okay...that sounded wrong, but you know what I mean.)

Summary: When yet another creature attacks Camelot, Merlin is forced to reveal his powers. Unable to kill his closest friend, Arthur sends him away. What does that mean for their destiny?

Chapter 7: Awkward Conversations

Previously: "Tell me everything you know."

Merlin froze. The clay jar he'd been holding slid from his fingers, hitting the floor with a crash. What had he gotten himself into?

"Sire?" he managed to gasp.

"You heard me," said Arthur impatiently. "What do you know of magic?"

Merlin stood in the middle of the room, opening and closing his mouth like an idiot, unsure of what exactly to say. When Leon had come riding into camp, Arthur before him on his horse, the last thing he'd been expecting was to have this conversation, or any conversation concerning magic.

Mentally grabbing hold of himself, Merlin took a deep breath and said calmly, "Most of my knowledge relates to the inherent magical properties of plants. I really don't know much about magic in general. If you have specific questions I could attempt to answer them," he suggested.

Arthur frowned in thought, but nodded in agreement. "Are people born with magic?"

It was a good thing that Merlin hadn't thought to pick anything else up else he would have dropped it and made a bigger mess on the floor. He sat down slowly, forcing himself to remain calm.

"I have that impression, yes," he said. "But no one has ever said anything outright."

"The people you've met, what were they like?" Arthur asked carefully.

Before Merlin could stop himself he said, "You mean did they seem evil?"

Arthur's face tightened, but he nodded.

"They seem scared," Merlin said. "Most of them are terrified that someone will hand them over to the king. When they come to me, it is often because they have no other choice. More often than I'd like they come too late. I would say that many of them are frightened enough to do something desperate, but most don't agree with the radicals that are responsible for most of the attacks on the city."

To his surprise, rather than object in anyway, Arthur simply nodded, his frown deepening. When several minutes passed and the prince hadn't spoken, Merlin cleared his throat nervously.

"Are you all right, sire?"

Letting out a sigh, Arthur leaned back. He caught Merlin's gaze, a pained look in his eyes. "No. I'm not all right. It's been coming clear to me that my father has been incredibly narrow-minded. His prejudice is forcing people to act in horrible ways. As you said, they're desperate. If it wasn't for a good hearted idiot warlock, I'd probably be dead."

Merlin didn't know what to say. Uncomfortable silence filled the little room. When he was unable to stand it any longer Merlin fetched a rag and began cleaning up the mess he'd made when he'd dropped the pot. The poultice was ruined, but easily replaced. It would give him something to do over the next few days while Arthur recovered enough to travel back to Camelot.

"You can't speak of this to anyone," Arthur said suddenly, twisting in the bed to face Merlin. The movement pulled at the wound in his side, but he ignored it. Merlin immediately hurried over to push him back, but Arthur batted him away. "Do you understand me? You cannot speak of this to anyone."

Merlin glared at him. "Sire, I often am trusted with people's darkest secrets because it necessary for me to help them. To do that, they must trust me. Whatever you say to me in here does not leave this room. You have my word."

Nodding once, Arthur let Merlin lean him back against the pillows. He was pale and sweat beaded his skin. Merlin fetched a vial from the store room and handed it to Arthur.

"It will help you sleep," he said quietly.

The prince downed it without complaint. He was out within minutes.

As soon as Arthur was asleep, Merlin stumbled to the back room and shut the door behind him. He muttered a quiet spell that would alert him if Arthur woke or if Leon came into the room. Dropping his head into his hand, he dropped into the chair.

When he'd left Camelot, he'd thought that Arthur would never forgive him. He hadn't had much chance to talk to Gaius, but even the old man's claims that Arthur had come to him, asking questions and that the prince had actually listened had been enough to assuage his fears. He'd thought Arthur to stubborn to change his mind, too loyal to his father to actually listen.

Apparently he'd been wrong. Never in his wildest dreams would Merlin have thought that Prince Arthur of Camelot would ask a complete stranger - as far as he believed, at least - about magic and admit that his father was wrong. It was mind boggling.

Merlin dropped his face into his hands. It seemed that almost everything he knew about Arthur had changed. He wasn't sure how to act around the prat now that he was actually starting to think for himself. He wasn't sure what he could say and what he couldn't say.

And maybe, just maybe, he'd actually be able to return to Camelot some day.

Before he could get his hopes up, Merlin stood and began remaking the poultice he'd ruined. There was nothing quite like work to keep his mind occupied. It was a good thing he had so much to do.

A day and a half later, Arthur was sufficiently recovered enough to ride back to Camelot, so long as they took it slowly. When Gaius had come to visit, he'd brought an old, placid nag for the prince to ride back on. Merlin couldn't say that he wasn't happy to see Arthur go. He'd been walking around on tiptoes ever since their uncomfortable conversation the first night. It was still too soon for Arthur to know who Emrys really was. Despite his change of heart regarding magic, Merlin knew that the prince would have to come to his own conclusions. Merlin couldn't press the issue. He hadn't quite trusted himself not to say or do something that was undeniably Merlin when he was around Arthur. It was going to be a relief to have the cottage to himself again.

While Arthur caught a few more minute's rest, Merlin packed a bag with the poultice and pain relieving tinctures he'd made, as well as extra bandages in case something happened on the road. Heaving the bag into his arms, he went outside where Leon was saddling the horses. The knight was adjusting the straps on his charger.

"You should be ready to go in just a few moments," Merlin said. "I just need to wrap the prince's rib so that the movement of the horse doesn't jolt his wound too much."

Leon nodded once, keeping his eyes focused on the buckle he was fiddling with. "Thank you for all you've done, Merlin."

The warlock's blood ran cold. Forcing his face into a carefully constructed expression of confusion, he turned back to Leon.

"I'm sorry? Who's Merlin?"

Leon lips quirked in a smile. "Don't play games with me. I heard you talking to Gaius."

"Oh bloody hell," Merlin muttered. "If Gaius knows that he'll kill me."

"I will admit that it was rather careless," Leon said. "But he won't hear of it from me."

Merlin stared at the knight in surprise. "He won't?"

"No, he won't. And neither will Arthur."

A gryphon could have landed in front of Merlin and started tearing up the village and he wouldn't have been able to do anything but stand there and stare at Leon. The knight seemed not to notice.

"But I'm a warlock," Merlin protested. "I used magic in front of you. You should be tying me up and hauling me in front of Uther. Why are you helping me?"

"Because I know you," Leon said. "Every time we're in trouble and something lucky happens that saves our hides you're there. I saw the way you knowingly did magic in front of Arthur and myself to stop the wyvern and now you've saved Arthur's life despite being run out of your home. If that doesn't mean you're a good person, I don't know what does."

"But...magic, and Uther, if he finds out-"

"Unless the healer Emrys decides to return to Camelot and cast a spell in front of the king, I doubt he'll ever know."

Merlin ran a hand through his hair. "Arthur will learn that one day. There's something you have to understand, I'm bound to Arthur by destiny. I have to protect him, to make sure that he become king. He's got a lot of enemies of his own, not to mention all the people who want to use him to get to Uther. The odds that I'll end up in a situation where Arthur finds out that Emrys and Merlin are the same person is very high. He may not be happy if he finds that you knew and you know he will."

"I'll take that chance," Leon said dryly. "So long as you keep watching out for him."

"That's a given."

"Then I have nothing to worry about. If Arthur's see fit to take offense at my keeping a secret to save his life, then so be it."

Merlin shook his head in amazement. "I don't know what to say, save thank you. You should probably tell Gaius, though. If something goes wrong, he knows how to contact me. In the event of an emergency, you're not going to want to waste time trying to explain everything. I'll deal with the eyebrow when the time comes."

Leon choked back a laugh. "I'll do that. You'd best get back in there and ready Arthur for the journey before he comes out himself."

Sure enough, when Merlin walked back into the room, Arthur was standing precariously beside the bed. He was still a bit wobbly from the blood loss and he was having trouble keeping his balance.

"What are you doing?" Merlin demanded. "If you're not careful you're going to wear yourself out and I'm going to keep you here another night! The journey is going to be difficult enough."

Arthur scowled at him, but sat down gingerly. "Father will not be happy if I do not return tonight," he growled.

"I'd rather risk the king's wrath then send a patient on a journey that he's not ready for," Merlin said firmly. "Which is why I'm going to bind your abdomen. You'll be stiff, but it's better than nothing."

Before the prince could complain, Merlin produced a roll of linen bandages and began wrapping it deftly around Arthur's ribs. As he tied off the ends, Arthur dropped a hand on his shoulder.

"Thank you for the other day," he said. "I know it must have been difficult to trust the son of the man who would do anything to destroy magic with the fact that you know of magic yourself. You gave me answers that I truly needed and you saved my life. I owe you for that."

"You need not thank me for doing what is right," Merlin said softly.

"I do when it could mean that you lose your own life."

As much as he would have liked to protest, Merlin knew that there was nothing he could say to sway Arthur when he thought his honor was on the line. The best he could do was accept gracefully. He slid an arm around the prince's shoulders and helped him stand. Together, the two made their way to the horses. Leon helped Merlin get Arthur into the saddle. The prince was grimacing by the time, but both Merlin and Leon carefully didn't notice.

Leon mounted his own horse. Merlin stepped back to give them room.

"Emrys," Arthur called. "Thank you."

"You already said that," Merlin said wryly. "If ever you need me, I am willing to help."

"I will keep that in mind," Arthur said.

Leon bowed his head toward Merlin, a knowing look in his eyes. He gathered up the reins of both his horse and Arthur's nag. Merlin watched them until they were out of sight.

Author's Note: Short chapter, I know. But this was just the best way to write it. I'd kind of hoped to have more to give you when I finally got back to writing after my extended vacation, but this was just the best way to write this chapter. I've been doing a lot more writing lately, but I've also been attacked by plot bunnies from another fandom, so there's no guarantee. Thanks so much for sticking with me and while I'm here, I have a question. What would you all say to a Merlin/HP crossover...cuz I might be writing one, lol.