"Mr. Dixon?", asked a middle-aged brunette, approaching Daryl and Beth. The pair had just finished their lunch at the Frosty Frog, a local spot that served relatively simple but delicious food.
"Yes… Please just call me Daryl" he said, as he stood up to greet the lady, shaking the hand that she'd extended to him. As soon and he and Beth had gotten into his truck to drive to lunch Daryl had called Carol, an area real estate agent, to ask about the possibility of her helping him with his search for an apartment. Daryl knew that Carol was a good agent, one of the best in the area, because he'd learned it from Andrea. Andrea was always keeping tabs on the other agents in the area, trying to snake them out of the best properties and doing whatever she could to one-up them. And Carol was one that she was in constant competition with. He'd known that the odds she'd be free were slim; but after he explained everything to her, including his past relationship with Andrea and his necessity to make sure that he did not run into her again, Carol quickly agree to "shuffle her schedule" and meet with him.
Beth had been oddly quiet in the car and Daryl wasn't sure if it had to do with Carol, or his mentioning Andrea in his conversation with her, or something else entirely. He couldn't help but feel like he was fighting a losing battle with her already today, and it was only lunchtime.
"And… is this your girlfriend?" Carol inquired, looking towards Beth and then back at Daryl.
"Oh… no. Um… Just a friend" Daryl answered awkwardly. Daryl hadn't known what to say – and he hoped his "just a friend" comment hadn't hurt Beth's feelings. Why would it, though? They were just friends after all, right?
Beth stood up quickly, seeming to want to relieve whatever tension Daryl's awkwardness had just cause. "I'm Beth" she said and stuck out her hand to shake Carol's. Daryl realized immediately that he should have introduced her to Carol himself. Great, he thought, something else he'd done wrong today.
Carol looked somewhat knowingly at the two, back and forth, from one to the other. Daryl wasn't sure what she was thinking about them, but he guessed it didn't matter. Women always tried to read situations, he thought, and he was sure his fumbling words had clued Carol in to his uncertainty about Beth. Carol asked them both to sit down and suggested that they discuss the specifics of what Daryl was looking for as far as size, price points, and preferred locations.
Daryl explained to Carol that he was open, for the most part, but that he would prefer to stay on the island, as he didn't want to spend an hour or more everyday driving to and from his job, which would almost all take place on the island. Daryl noticed that Beth seemed especially pleased by this, nodding her head as he talked, as if agreeing with him, a small smile creeping onto her face. He hoped that she wanted him to be near her, as well as his job, and he couldn't help but think that if he hadn't met Beth the location may have been less of an issue for him. What was a little bit of a commute, anyway? He had to stop himself from thinking that way though and he knew it.
Carol explained that apartments on the island were more expensive than those in surrounding areas, like Bluffton and Beaufort, but that she thought she could find him something within the price range he'd mentioned. Daryl also mentioned that he was interested in the possibility of looking at furnished rentals, since he had no furniture of his own to speak of. He also told her that he didn't need much and wouldn't need much space, even a studio apartment would be fine. Lastly, Daryl indicated to Carol that it was very important to him that none of the properties he considered have any connection with Andrea's business – he couldn't put himself into the position of having any connection with her. He had come a long way in just a couple of days, but he didn't want to risk running into her and putting himself into a bad situation.
"Alright" Carol said, as they'd finally discussed all the necessary details they needed to. "Let me make a few calls quickly and hopefully we'll have a few places we can go ahead and see this afternoon".
"Great" Daryl said, as he looked over at Beth, smiling at her. She gave him a small smile back and simply nodded. As Carol stepped away, Daryl asked "Beth, are you okay?".
"Sure… um… why?" Beth answered somewhat tentatively.
Daryl couldn't help but continue to feel that something seemed a little off with Beth. Ever since they'd left her house to go out for lunch, she hadn't been the same. Sure, she'd been pleasant, and they'd talked comfortably through lunch. But she just didn't seem quite as happy as she had before. The spark in her eyes, which he'd been captivated by the night before, and even during breakfast that morning, had faded. Daryl wanted to know what was going on – he knew it was something, but he just couldn't imagine what.
"I don't know… It's nothing, I guess" he said quickly, avoiding making eye contact with Beth.
"No… Don't do that. Tell me… " she said.
Daryl took a deep breath, and then another. He wasn't sure what to say to Beth. Maybe he was just being paranoid. He was struggling to keep his feelings in check – and he had been doing that since the moment he met her, it seemed. He knew he had to focus though. He would find an apartment and start his new job – and he and Beth could settle into a normal routine of being friends. What would that look like, though? He didn't know – he had never really had a girl as just a friend before. But routine sounded good in that moment - he wouldn't be super needy anymore and she'd be free to get back to her normal life, whatever that looked like.
Still, though, he needed to know she was okay. He wasn't going to drag her along to see all these apartments if something was wrong, or if she just wasn't into going.
"You… you just seem kinda different is all" Daryl started to explain. "Like… not as happy. Almost like you're down about something".
Beth didn't respond. She looked at Daryl like a deer in headlights and then quickly looked down at her hands.
"Beth? Is there something the matter? You can tell me… you can talk to me" Daryl pleaded. He knew something had to be wrong. Why else wouldn't she have responded?
Beth continued to look at her hands. She had started picking at her fingernails and her cuticles and Daryl couldn't help but think she was doing it out of a nervous habit. "I'm alright, Daryl. Really." she finally responded.
"You're not, Beth" he said, leaning towards her a bit, hoping she'd look up at him, actually talk to him. "I haven't known you very long… but… I know something's the matter. I can't take not knowing".
"Why does it matter?" Beth asked very softly, shrugging her shoulders. At first, Daryl wasn't sure he'd heard her correctly – why in the world would she say something like that?
"It matters, Beth!" Daryl said emphatically. And he reached out and grabbed her shoulder, shaking her slightly, just enough that she'd look up and meet his gaze. "Your emotions have been like a roller coaster today… and I need you to tell me what's on your mind. Did I… do something… say something to make you upset?" Daryl asked. He didn't know what was going on with Beth, but he couldn't help but think that he had something to do with it.
Beth looked down again and he was afraid she'd never tell him. Something was definitely wrong – very wrong. But finally she looked up at him again and the look on her face almost broke Daryl's heart.
"I'm sorry… I… I don't know what's come over me. I just… I thought… you might want to stay at my house just… just for another day or two. It's so dumb." Beth said to him. He could tell she was trying hard to gage his reaction. She started to shake her head and then spoke again – "And I can't even believe I just said that to you out loud…".
"Beth… Listen to me…" Daryl said as he started to respond to her. He was going to be honest, even though he didn't want to be. He wasn't sure how she'd take it, even though he knew he was doing the right thing for her, even if she wouldn't recognize it at first. "We can still hang out, okay? Just… I… I need to get my life back on track again. I need to stand on my own two feet again, find a new normal but on my own. You've been… well, really great these last couple of days. Really. I don't deserve it. But I can't just keep relying on you to help me. I gotta do this."
He cut himself off. He was afraid of saying too much – he didn't want to cross the line and tell her that he was deathly afraid of getting himself wrapped up in someone else so quickly after his breakup with Andrea. He knew he'd made a lot of mistakes with Andrea – he jumped in too early and he got burned in the end. And he wouldn't let himself get lost in Beth. It was what they both needed, space and time. They were friends and he would do everything he could to protect that, even as he realized more and more that he wanted more from her. More than he could have, he thought. He wished he could tell her all these things, but he knew it'd make things awkward between them. And he couldn't risk that – he couldn't do that to her.
Just as he thought Beth was about to say something else, Carol walked back over quickly.
"I've gotten four apartments lined up for us already" she said with a smile, seemingly pleased with her quickness in getting appointments lined up for Daryl. "So we better get moving!" she continued and waved her hand to Daryl and Beth, indicating to them that they should follow her out of the restaurant.
Daryl stood up slowly, still processing the conversation he'd just been having with Beth. He looked over at her as she stood up next to him, and he couldn't escape the feeling that she still seemed deeply sad and that he'd caused it. He wanted to reassure her, to tell her that everything would be okay. He wanted to tell her again, just like he had in her kitchen that morning, that he wasn't going to just disappear on her. He wanted to tell her that in the little bit of time that he'd known her she'd shown him more compassion than anyone had in his entire life. But he couldn't find the words. And all he could think to do was reach out and hug her. So he did.
"We're good, right?" he asked shyly, almost whispering into her ear. He somehow hoped by asking that he could just wish it into reality.
"Yeah…" was her only reply, but she squeezed him a little tighter and he hoped she really meant what she'd said.
Beth was exhausted by the time she and Daryl made it back to her house early that evening. She yawned as she walked into the house, throwing her purse and her keys down on the nearest surface and heading straight to the living room to lie down on the couch. Beth had told Daryl that she needed to rest for a while – and although he was excited about his new apartment, eagerly thinking of preparations he needed to make for it, he'd generously agreed to give her some much-needed rest. Beth guessed that her late night the previous evening coupled with her over-emotional state today had caused her to feel so worn out. She hoped with a short nap she'd feel better and be ready to hang out with Daryl again tonight. As Beth closed her eyes she thought back to the events of the afternoon.
They had been to see the four apartments Carol had made appointments for initially, and then she'd taken them to see two more on a whim. Daryl had gotten lucky that she'd thought of those last two, because when they stepped into the very last one, he'd looked over at Beth and gave her a smile that let her know he'd found what he was looking for.
Before going in, Carol had told them to "keep an open mind", which had initially worried Beth. That seemed like code for something that might not have been quite up to her standards. The apartment was actually a furnished room over someone's garage. The garage was separated from the house, though, and would give Daryl complete privacy. It was very nice inside, having recently been remodeled and updated with all new furnishings, and included a small kitchen area, a decent-sized living room area, and a fairly large bedroom, walk-in closet, and bathroom. Daryl had commented on how much he loved the design, as well as all the furnishings, right away, but when Carol told him how low the price on the place was, he had seemed to be a bit skeptical. Beth guessed that he'd assumed that if the rent was so low something had to be wrong with the place. But, with Carol's encouragement, he agreed that it was the right place for him. She personally knew the owners and vouched for them, telling Daryl that they simply wanted someone to occupy the apartment and take care of it, the rent wasn't of that much concern to them. Daryl seemed to take Carol's endorsement to heart and, after a supportive nod and smile from Beth, he'd told Carol he wanted to fill out the paperwork for it.
Daryl had hoped that the apartment would be ready for immediate move-in, but Carol told him that the owners wouldn't be ready for him to move until Friday. Beth remembered the look on his face as he looked over at her, almost asking with his glance if he could stay with her until Friday. She'd nodded at him again and smiled, not needing to say anything to let him know that what she'd said this morning really was true – he could stay with her as long as he needed to.
And with Beth's unspoken support he filled out all the paperwork and paid the deposit. He agreed to meet Carol at her office on Friday during his lunch break to pick up the key so that he could take his things over to the apartment on Friday night after he got off work.
When he and Beth were suddenly alone again, in the car on the way back to Beth's, she couldn't help but feel a little better than she had earlier. Daryl's apartment was only a five-minute drive from her house; she wasn't sure why that mattered so much to her, but for some reason she liked the close proximity. And while Beth had somehow gotten attached the idea of Daryl staying with her for a longer period of time, she knew it was best for him to have his own place. Not only did he need it for himself, but she wouldn't have to risk the consequences of her uncle finding out that she'd moved a man into his house. She couldn't help but smile, though, as she thought that part of her wish had come true – Daryl would have to stay with her for a few more nights. She knew she shouldn't be so excited about that, now that he had a definite place to move, she shouldn't get too attached, at least to him being so near to her.
Daryl had eagerly chatted during the short-drive home. He seemed thrilled with the promise of the new place and Beth was genuinely happy that he'd found such a good option right away. Daryl had mentioned some things he'd need to get for the apartment – mainly a few items for the kitchen. He'd commented that he wasn't much of a cook, but he'd still need a few things to make do with. While the apartment had all the major things furnished, like furniture and large appliances, including a washer and dryer, Daryl would need things like pots and pans, plates, glasses, and silverware, as well as a few things for his bedroom and bathroom, particularly linens. Beth had instantly hoped that he'd ask for her help. Maybe she shouldn't jump to that, though, she thought. She still wasn't positive of how things would be once Daryl moved out in just a few short days. They would still see each other, she told herself. She'd make sure of it.
Beth's last thoughts, before she drifted off into a much-needed nap, surrounded her incredibly emotional state that day. She had truly been on an emotional roller coaster all day, and she wasn't quite sure why. She hadn't gotten as much sleep as usual the night before, but that was often the case, especially during the school year, and she wasn't normally affected by it in that way. She could only guess that her emotions had a lot to do with her feelings about Daryl. Sure, they had just met and were just starting to be friends, but she felt so connected to him already. And that connection she felt made everything that was happening so much more impactful.
She felt confused. She knew she and Daryl could only be friends – and she was fine with that arrangement. It really was for the best, and she knew it. She knew she needed to slow her brain down, as well as her heart – she needed to get her emotions in check before she scared Daryl away. What man would want to be around someone that was so up and down all the time? She had too many thoughts, too many emotions that betrayed her common sense about the situation. She also knew that while their friendship had started because she'd perceived that he was needy and she could provide help, this was no longer really the case – Daryl had recovered amazingly well in the past few days and she could no longer see him as a broken and bruised man on the beach. She would need to learn how to see Daryl differently and she couldn't think of a better thing to focus on than a simple forging of a new friendship.