Chapter 7: Infiltration Op

Inaba began a slow trot to the hospital where Yui was now convalescing. She knew the location, about three kilometers down the main road towards the river. She would have to backtrack past the hotel and her old high school to get there. She had exhausted her remaining funds on the ramen noodles and didn't have enough money for a second bus fare.

After a few minutes of jogging she started to pant. She never was a particularly good athlete in high school, not like Yui or Iori. Then she felt her stomach starting to cramp and she grimaced. She regretted slurping down those ramen noodles so quickly; she knew it wasn't healthy to try to run right away after eating. She allowed herself to slow to a fast walk.

During her rapid walk she knew she had some extra time to think. The hospital was still about two kilometers away. It was getting late in the day and the foot traffic was almost nonexistent, so she let her mind wander back over the past 36 hours.

Does Taichi really love me? He says he does.

Or does he love me simply because I happened to be his first?

She thought back about their relationship together. She remembered that she was the one who initiated it way back in high school - that she, not he, was the one who first started it early in their freshman year. Granted, she wasn't acting as she normally would - Heartseed had messed with her mind to unleash her innermost desires and remove all of her inhibitions. And so she tried to undress and basically jump Taichi when they were alone in the school clubroom together. Fortunately her self-control returned seconds before things actually got out of hand. As she regained her senses she was, of course, completely mortified and embarrassed, and she quickly fled the room.

She fled not only out of simple embarrassment but also because she did not fully understand her own feelings, and it scared her. For the first time she realized that she had deep-seated feelings for Taichi, feelings that were more than just an idle fantasy or a daydream. Previously, in an attempt to help Inaba when Heartseed was swapping their bodies randomly, Taichi had sheepishly confessed to her that he had had impure thoughts about her and had fantasized about her. He was so mortified and shocked when she revealed to him that she had also experienced those same impure thoughts and fantasies just like he did. His obvious double-standard amused her to no end, and she had laughed uproariously at his expense. And so, to distract the poor girl from her shame, Taichi reminded her about his own earlier embarrassing incident with her. It worked. She smiled and forgot about her own embarrassment.

She marveled that he would deliberately make himself so vulnerable just to help her, that he would sacrifice his own ego just for her benefit. Such a wonderful man. So caring, so loving. And she realized that she wanted him even then. Not as a fantasy, but for real. She was falling in love with him.

She always took the next step in their relationship, not him. A few weeks later she stole her first kiss from him in a surprise lunge, his eyes wide. Then later, as he lay injured in bed and fearing she would lose him, she collapsed at his bedside. She cried out 'I love you!' over and over. He soon fully recovered, and shortly afterwards they became an official couple. As they continued to date each other through their high school years she often nestled her head in that warm safe spot under his arm, her eyes closed, at peace.

And they seemed to grow stronger together. Taichi explained that their differences were why they meshed so well together as a couple: they each helped to strengthen the other and to compensate for the other's weaknesses.

During those years he was always the perfect gentleman; he never took advantage of her. And so in their first year together in college she was the one who initiated their first union. It happened on that night after the party when they had both drank too much sake and she had snuck into his men-only dorm room that first time. And in that room she had pushed him to the floor. He didn't resist. She remembered his eyes. They were so wide, so innocent. And so she took him right then, straddling him, taking ownership of him, making him hers. The fact she was also losing her own virginity was inconsequential. If anything she used those stains to mark him, to brand him, to claim him as her own.

And then almost four years later she was the one who got impatient and finally blurted out the marriage proposal. It was Taichi, after getting over his initial shock, who had stutteringly accepted. Again it was unplanned. It just happened. She had later rationalized the act because she felt he would have never taken the next logical step on his own. She knew that no matter how much he loved her, it would have taken Mr. Squish forever for him to build up enough courage to actually put a ring on her finger. So she pushed him along again.

And so I took you. Every step of the way I took you. Every step it was me: First longing, first kiss, first screw, first proposal, and finally marriage. Every step it was me pushing you along, grabbing you and shoving you forward. And you just went along with it. You went along because that's the kind of nice guy that you are.

I forced this on you. Oh Taichi, I'm so sorry. Do you love me? Me? Not the idea, but the real me?

No, how can you? How can you possibly love such a selfish, impulsive, pushy, needy, insecure, messed-up girl? You could have fallen in love with anybody...

With anybody. I finally realize that now.

Iori even warned me during our final fight. And I didn't listen to her. She was right. She was always right. I was just the most assertive girl in the group.

I know I don't deserve you.

It was only because I got to you first.

She felt that had to be the reason. He certainly didn't love her because of her looks, or so she believed. She felt that she was never a particularly attractive girl. Yui, now that girl was beautiful, an athlete and an expert in martial arts. And Iori? She had that delightful pixie-girl charm. But herself? She was just a pushy tomboy. Although he never said it, she felt that her father had wanted her to be a son, not a daughter. A son, the worthy successor to his empire.

She thought back to her own childhood. She had almost no memories of her mother, who separated from her father a few years after she was born. And her father always seemed to be away on business travel. She vaguely remembered having a series of Korean nannies during her earliest years. They came and went. She didn't even remember their names.

She had no real friends as a child. Oh, her nannies would occasionally take her to the park and she would interact a bit with the other children, but they came and went too. Other than that she was left more-or-less alone.

So she played mostly by herself. She never liked playing with dolls or anything inside. Outside, the house had a large back yard (by Japanese standards) with a garden, swings, and a portico, all surrounded by a brick wall. And behind that yard was an unlocked gate that led to an acre of unfenced woods that encompassed some housing plots that her father had kept undeveloped for financial speculation, waiting for their land value to increase for later resale.

And so, in that little secret woodland behind the house, she created her own private world purely out of her own vivid imagination. She imagined that she was a fairy princess who was swept away into a fantastical realm full of magic and wonder. She pretended the croaking frogs were talking to her, and she talked back to them. She saw the birds singing to her in the trees, so she talked back to them too. They were her friends.

Later she found a pair of squirrels. Each morning she set out a handful of walnuts for them. Eventually, after much coaxing, the squirrels grew tame enough to crawl up her back as she sat on the ground. One day they climbed into her hair as the little girl giggled and laughed. More friends.

And so Inaba played and lived out her fantasy as a woodland princess with all of her delightful make-believe friends.

All alone.

It was not until she entered high school that she had made her first real human friends: Iori, Taichi, Yui, and Aoki, the members of the StuCS. During the next three years Heartseed's numerous trials and tribulations had forged them like steel into a nakama - friends who were closer than family.

She had real friends. True friends. Their friendship was forged in the blast furnace of Heartseed's tests. They had become closer as friends in their struggle to survive than many people would ever experience in any relationship over a whole human lifetime, even between spouses or between a parent and child.

As graduation neared they wanted their nakama to last forever, and so at the end of their senior year they held a special ceremony (that Iori had set up) where they solemnly reaffirmed their vows to each other to remain together always.

But after graduation life got in the way as it so often did. Aoki failed to pass his college exams. He started taking odd jobs wherever he could find them. Between work and college it was becoming difficult to arrange regular meeting times that worked for everyone's busy schedules.

Then six months after graduation Aoki's attack on Yui tore the group asunder. Yui was in a coma and Aoki was locked up awaiting trial. In the immediate aftermath Iori blamed herself, Inaba, and Taichi in equal measure for not preventing what had happened. She said she intended to leave the group.

Iori left unspoken the second reason, the more important reason, about why she felt she needed to quit the nakama: that with only three of them remaining she did not want to become the hypotenuse in a potential love triangle between herself, Taichi and Inaba. Iori knew she would never poach Taichi away, but she also knew that Inaba was a very insecure person inside - too insecure for the trio to remain stable. Iori believed Inaba would always worry about it. So Iori thought it would be best if she left the group too.

Inaba wanted her to stay and confronted her about it. She forced Iori to reveal the second reason why she wanted to leave. Inaba then exploded at Iori's apparent lack of faith in Inaba's ability to trust her. Vicious recriminations were exchanged between them. They knew each other's psychological faults and weaknesses better than any psychologist ever could, and so they tore into each other, with Inaba going mostly on the offensive, flailing Iori apart inside. She attacked her brutally like Hannibal Lecter's verbal evisceration of Clarice Starling in The Silence of the Lambs. Inaba said some incredibly hurtful words, words that should not have been spoken, and those awful words destroyed their relationship permanently. Iori no longer wanted any contact with her. The next day Inaba quickly tried to apologize but the damage was already done. Iori was gone.

That left Inaba and Taichi as the remaining members, just the two of them. And so the group was disbanded.

And life went on.

Inaba continued to hurry on foot towards hospital. She was already getting winded, and the nausea in her stomach was growing, but she willed herself to push on. As she walked she let her mind drift again.

Inaba had enrolled at Kyosho University with a major in Biological Science. She chose that major to better understand Heartseed. But at the end of her third semester she switched to dual majors in Information Technology and Business Administration. She chose the latter at the behest of her father, and she chose the former because she was very adept with computers. It was a side effect of having spent so much time alone on her PC in her bedroom when she was in middle school. Her bedroom was enormous by Japanese standards, but it remained curiously empty except for her bed and the PC on her desk.

She had spent thousands of hours on that PC in her room. She roamed the Internet, wandering far and wide. She even made some online friends on some of the chat boards. But she was always careful to hide her real identity or location.

After graduation Taichi decided to follow Inaba, so he enrolled in the same university. He initially took science courses with an undeclared major, deliberately enrolling in the same bio-science classes as Inaba to be with her. By his third year he majored in Social Work to no one's surprise. He worked two jobs to pay for his tuition, which began to run him ragged with his full-time course load. Eventually because of his dedication he won a scholarship, which allowed him to cut back on his hours and see more of Inaba.

Both lived on campus in their respective dorms. Taichi had his own room on the second floor of the men's dorm, located in the back. There was a sturdy oak tree with a large branch right by his dorm window. Inaba's not-so-secret infiltrations through that window for overnight liaisons became a running joke among the other men in the dorm. None of them ratted out the couple. Indeed, Taichi often got high-fives in the hallway. The couple could have kept things going indefinitely if she didn't have so many fights with him. But eventually the dorm monitor heard her cussing him out behind closed doors and busted them both. He forced Taichi to move downstairs into a shared dorm room, one that was located next to his own. That permanently ended their shared nights together. Well, most of them anyway.

It also ended their fights.

Oddly, the enforced physical separation between them seemed to draw them closer together emotionally. The fact they could see each other only rarely seemed to heighten her feelings for him. The tsundere became less tsun and more dere.

Inaba was nearing the large hospital facility. She huffed and puffed as she pulled out Iori's cellphone to read the SMS text message one more time. The message was simple and direct. Yui Kiriyama is conscious. At hospital for eval. Wishes to see you. - Dr. Niban

She went inside, crossed the main concourse, and walked rapidly up to the front information desk. A bored staff attendant was sitting at the desk reading a magazine. Inaba tried to catch her breath. "Hello.. I'm (pant) here to see (pant) Yui Kiriyama. Doctor Niban notified me (pant). I'm a good friend of hers. (wheeze)"

The attendant finally looked up from her magazine, looking clearly annoyed. She silently and curtly pointed at the sign next to the desk. Visiting hours were over. Inaba would have to come back tomorrow.

"But..."

The attendant spoke in a haughty tone: "Only staff and immediate family may see patients after hours. Come back tomorrow. Good day." The attendant went back to reading her magazine.

Inaba turned around.. now what? Walk back the three kilometers again? To where? Where was she going to stay the night anyway? She felt gloomy.

Then to her left she heard a sound. It was faint. "Pssst!"

She turned and squinted. She spied a large open hallway off the main concourse, about 20 meters long, that ran parallel to the main sidewalk out front. The sign above the start of the hallway read 'Out-Patient Clinic'. Even though clinic hours were long over the doors to the clinic were still apparently open. At the far end of the hallway she could just barely make out Taichi, Aoki, and Iori. Their heads were poking around the corner, looking like a trio of whack-a-moles. Aoki was making silly hand motions. Taichi slapped Aoki's hands and made more sensible motions for her to go outside and up the sidewalk. Iori was nodding her head in agreement. Then all three heads disappeared.

She rolled her eyes. Oh great. They think they are The Three Musketeers or something.

Inaba sighed and turned again for the outside door. Before leaving she took a quick glance behind her. The staff attendant was still engrossed in her magazine. Inaba nonchalantly walked outside, then turned left and walked casually down the sidewalk towards the locked side entrance.

A beefy arm pushed open the side door and waved like a maniac. She heard Aoki's hoarse whispering, "C'mon!"

Inaba stopped. Those chuckleheads are going to get themselves arrested within two minutes. She wanted no part of their crazy scheme, whatever it was.

But she did want to see Yui. She was awake, upstairs, waiting. For her friends.

So she went inside.

Why did she do it? It was because she knew that those three doofuses could never be able to successfully infiltrate a major national Japanese medical hospital without getting caught. Not in a million years.

But with her? With her leadership? They just might be able to pull it off.

After all, she was an expert in the art of infiltration, having successfully snuck into Taichi's dorm room dozens of times even after the dorm monitor was specifically looking for her. The tree branch next to his dorm window had even been cut down.

But they could never stop a determined Inaba. And she relished the challenge. She still successfully snuck into his new front side dorm room (albeit less often), and they never caught her again.

Those three idiots. First, she made sure they were all looking at her face. She made a zip-lipped motion: silence, then she pointed at her own eyes and then pointed down the side hallway towards a sign that read 'Linen Closet'. Her platoon understood. She crouched and took point. She took some steps, did a quick glance around, then continued to creep forward, keeping low. The other three bunched up close behind her. They bumped her. She shoved them all back and glared at them, back off, you morons! Aoki fell on his butt and yelped. Iori fell on top of him. She made a small 'Oof!' noise but otherwise managed to keep quiet. Taichi helped them both up.

Inaba cringed, hoping there was no security guard on patrol nearby. She made a rapid round-up motion with her arm to order the Three Stooges to hurry up and regroup behind her.

The linen closet was located just ahead past the next intersection. Inaba stopped and waited for the Three Caballeros to bump into her again, which of course they did. She gave them the obligatory death glare and they backed off. At least this time they didn't fall over each other.

She did a quick scan around the intersection, checking all directions. Then she saw it. It was mounted above a closed door, 12 meters down the intersecting hallway, a rotating closed-circuit camera. She had to gamble that the camera would not see the relatively small cross-section of her forehead poking out around the corner, or at least that the guard on duty watching the cameras would be inattentive. But she wouldn't gamble on the guard seeing a quartet of bumbling trespassers running past. She waited and watched the camera intently. The camera made a 180 degree pass on the Y axis every 30 seconds, completing one cycle per minute.

She waited. Then she turned to face her team and did a countdown with her five fingers: 5..4..3..2..1.. Go!

Aoki got excited and jumped the gun. He ended up pushing the others. All three of them ended up sprawled on the linoleum floor directly in front of the camera that was quickly swiveling in their direction.

Taichi got up fastest. He pulled up Inaba and they sprinted past the camera. Aoki grabbed and carried Iori.

They made it. It was close.

Inaba's eyes were not difficult to read. Aoki, I'm gonna kill you. He made a helpless apologetic shrug. Taichi grinned at his wife. She read it. This is just like old times.

She returned a small smile back to her husband. Yeah, it is. Iori caught the exchange of eye contact. Good.

The quartet crept into the linen closet and closed the door behind them. It was pitch dark. Inaba fumbled for the light switch and turned it on. The closet was a tight fit. Aoki's muscular bulk did not help.

Inaba finally took a good breath. "Okay. Let's see what we got here.." She started digging through the laundy hamper in front of her. The others got the hint and starting digging into the other hampers. Iori found a nurses' frock that fit her. Inaba pulled out an extra-large orderly's blue tunic and slacks and threw them at Aoki's head. He caught them with his face. He didn't protest and meekly put them on.

Taichi found a doctor's lab coat and wore it. Inaba found a second one and put it on herself.

"Now listen everybody," Inaba hissed, "Taichi and I are the doctors. I'll walk with my colleague up front. I will greet anybody who approaches. You two follow behind and try not to make eye contact with anybody. I will do all the talking. You three will keep quiet. Got it?"

They nodded in agreement. "Good." Then she paused. "Wait, what floor is Yui on?" The staff attendant had never said. "Dang it.."

Taichi approached his wife. "I called ahead and asked before we got here. Floor 12."

She smiled at him again. Good man. "Right, let's go."

Now wearing their disguises, they walked with purpose up the hall and back to the front desk. On their way through the clinic, Inaba spotted a stethoscope laying by a coffee station near the restroom. She grabbed it and nonchalantly put it around her neck. As they approached the front desk she walked slightly behind Dr. Taichi, trying not to show her face to the staff attendant at the front desk.

They walked past the attendant. She never looked up from her magazine.

They reached the elevators. Inaba gave a quick sigh of relief. She hit the Up button.

They went up together to floor 12.

They reached Yui's door without incident. The door was shut. They couldn't hear anything. Aoki shoved his way past Taichi and pressed against Inaba's back. He was so eager he was practically shaking.

Inaba turned around. "No, Aoki, you wait right here. Do not come inside until we say it's okay. Got it?"

"But.. why?"

What kind of question was that? Didn't he understand? "Because, you moron, how do you think she might react if she sees the person who almost killed her? You put her into a coma! Look, I know how much she means to you, and I'm sure you didn't mean to hurt her. But we don't want you to frighten her; you know she's androphobic. So here is what we will do: Iori and I will go in and talk to her first. If we think it's okay and she agrees, you and Taichi can come in. But not until us two girls talk to her first and she says it is okay for you to see her, got it?"

Aoki's eyes were pleading with her. "But.. Inaba, you don't understand.. None of you understand.."

"Aoki.. please.."

"No! She won't be scared of me. I know it!"

And then they heard it through the door. A girl's voice. Faint but clear.

"Yoshi.. is that you?"

Aoki shoved his way past Inaba. She said, "Hey, wait! Stop!" But there was no way she could halt the hulking man. He ran past and went inside.

The remaining trio were caught off-guard.

And at that moment a large hand clamped itself on Inaba's shoulder. She froze. It was a large orderly. He was frowning. Two other big orderlies were with him. They looked ready and eager.

A man in a white lab coat then stepped forward. He addressed Inaba directly, "Young lady, I believe that is mine."

Dr. Niban then removed the stethoscope from around Inaba's neck.

The trio continued to stare at the doctor. Inaba was speechless.

He went on. "I don't think you quite realize the seriousness of what you have done here. Yoshifumi Aoki is a convicted violent felon. You have just enabled him to violate a strict no-contact court order. You must have known it was a condition of his parole."

He motioned the two big orderlies to go inside the room to bring out Aoki. The doctor looked at them all with doleful eyes. He took no enjoyment in what he was about to do.

"I am calling the police. I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you are all going to jail.."

Inaba thought, Oh no... I did it again. It's all my fault.. Again.. All my fault..

".. and one of you will be going away for a long, long time."

A/N:

Dear reader, I have been careful in this story to explain to you the essential background information about the characters that you need to know from the original anime in order to follow the plot. Indeed, if I did my job correctly, you should be able to follow this story pretty well without any familiarity with the anime at all.

And so, by necessity, there will be spoilers for the anime in this story. In particular, this story assumes that all 17 (not 13) episodes of Kokoro Connect have taken place. The biggest and most obvious spoiler is that Taichi finally chose Inaba at the end of the final episode (Ep 17), a fact that is rather difficult to avoid in this story for obvious reasons.

Now, I do know that many of you have not seen episodes 14-17 because they are not available in western markets. However, some spoilers for those late episodes cannot be helped, and although I'll try not to gratuitously spill them all, some late spoilers are going to be inevitable given the nature of this story. Sorry about that.

-HuuskerDu