[A/N-This is kind of short, I know. Also, I couldn't resist giving the cat Ichigo's nickname. It's cheesy. But it amused me. I had a wicked lot of trouble trying to get Rukia and Ichigo to sound even a little in character, especially since Tite Kubo, wonderful though he is, doesn't do characters with very deep romantic attachments. Any kind of love scene with these two seems totally OOC . . . anyway, enough of my yammering-enjoy.]

Animal Land is . . . amazing. I lack the words to fully describe it. Ichigo and the others aren't so impressed, as they've been here a "million times"(in their words), and think it's "getting run down". But I love it, as Ichigo predicted. We ride giant spinning pandas and hopping high frogs; go on the Hamster Wheel roller coasters and slide through snake mazes. There are furry bunnies and happy bears everywhere I look-even the food is shaped like adorable animals. My favorite place is the petting zoo, where a mangy, long-legged barn cat immediately adopts me.

He springs into my arms when I squat down to pet him, rubbing his flea-ridden head against my chin. "Hey there, cutie." I coo, and he purrs in reply. He isn't very old, the supervisor tells me as she makes her rounds to feed the various farm animals out to be stroked. "We found him just yesterday, abandoned by the side of the road. Barely more than a kitten, he is, and no home to speak of." she says, dumping a box of kibble into the dog pen.

"Poor thing." I rub my nose against the cat's. "What's his name?"

"Hasn't got one." the supervisor moves on, losing interest in the conversation. I, however, sit on the ground for a good hour, playing with Berry-tan, as I name him, for his speckly orange and white coat.

The whole time, Ichigo is leaning on the fence surrounding the pen, watching me. I pretend that I don't feel his eyes on me, but my movements are self-conscious and clumsy, for the most part. I'm reluctant to leave my new friend when Ichigo calls that it's time for lunch, so I go to the supervisor and ask if I can take the cat with me.

"I guess." she says, doubt plain on her features. "We let him roam through the park where he wants. Just don't abuse him." she looks at me, assessing. "Naw. You won't. But be responsible."

"Okay!" I squeal, scooping up Berry and hugging him close. He yowls in protest and I loosen my hold; for some reason, he seriously reminds me of Ichigo.

At least the cat, I think as I make my way to the picnic tables, I can pat to my heart's desire.

Lunch is hot dogs rolled in bacon and things on sticks, along with the cookies and cakes that I brought along and some lemonade acquired by the boys through mysterious and unquestioned means. After eating, everyone splits up to re-ride their favorite attractions before the park's early closing at three. Ichigo follows me as I reluctantly return Berry to the petting zoo.

When I try to put him down, it's like Berry senses that I'm going to leave. He hisses and claws at me, hurting me. "Ow!" I involuntarily squeak. "Stop that!" I scold. I've known the cat for two hours, and already I'm convinced that he's smarter than most humans.

"Berry-tan, I have to go. You live here, and I live elsewhere."

I'm far too aware of Ichigo hovering behind me, and try to not associate my conversation with a cat to the problems I'm having in real life. There's a funny similarity, though. "You'll be fine here." I soothe, keeping my voice even. "Now you have to let go, or you'll make me cry."

Berry hisses again, and digs his claws into the skirt of my dress. Ichigo reaches over my shoulder and picks up the cat by the scruff of his neck. "This is the most pathetic creature I have ever seen." he informs me. "He looks like you just picked him up off of the street."

"I seem to have a way with troublemakers." I say dryly, then kick myself. With Ichigo so casually talking to me, it's hard to not automatically respond.

"He does look like trouble." Ichigo muses. "Got fleas, too. You sure know how to pick'em."

"It's not my fault he attached himself to me." I say, petulantly, and give up on silence altogether. Looks like I'm talking to Ichigo again-that didn't last long.

Ichigo lowers the cat into my arms. "Maybe you should keep him."

I snort. "And what? Let him live in your closet? Besides, the park probably won't let me take him-he belongs here."

"What about what he wants?" he counters.

"It's not about what he wants." I argue. "It's about what's best for him."

"Are we talking about the cat, or me?" Ichigo asks, point blank. I look away.

"Is that what this is about?" he goes on. "You're getting all up-in-arms because you have to leave, and this is your way of breaking it to me?"

"I'm not leaving." I say. "Unless you're seriously kicking me out."

Ichigo sighs. "No, I'm not kicking you out-but don't think I'm going to let you go back into your si-"

I glare up at him, and he cuts himself off. "Look, just take the cat." he says. "No one's gonna care."

"There are people who care about him." I don't know why we're arguing about a stupid feline, except that it's easier to talk about than what's really going on. "They'd miss him."

"So come to the park to visit him."

"I can't stay here. Eventually, I'll have to leave." Now I'm really not talking about Berry. "Eventually, I'll have to go back to where I come from."

"And? What's wrong with being friends in the meantime?"

"Because I feel more than friendship!" I blurt out.

Ichigo gives me a weird look. "Are you confessing your love for a cat?"

"No, I'm talking about you!" I'm so used to arguing with Ichigo, I say it before thinking. I say it before really knowing what I'm saying. Then my brain catches up; my mouth clamps shut, and I'm sure my face is the same color as Berry's coat. "Shit. Forget I said that."

"Ru-"

I shake my head. "I can't stay. I can't." I insist. "And I can't do this-I can't be in love with you, Ichigo." It's amazing how calmly I can say it. How honest I can be while saying things that make my heart ache. "Besides the fact that I'd get exiled from Soul Society, and besides the fact that you're a living human and I'm not-the fact remains that I am going to leave one day. And if I'm not in love with you, then I don't have to be heartbroken when that happens."

I put Berry-tan on the ground; and, as if sensing my mood, he lets me release him. There isn't anything left to say, really. I square my shoulders and turn to Ichigo. "So. That's why I was ignoring you. I'm trying not to love you any-"

"Bull crap!" he exclaims. His face is a little pink, but he's scowling like usual. "Trying not to love me? What kinda whacked out-I mean, jeez, you can't force yourself to feel or not feel!" he shakes his head. "It sounds to me like you're just afraid of being hurt. Like you're being a coward." He's trying to goad me, I know he is; trying to get me mad so that I'll go back to normal, so that I won't leave or be silent and he can pretend that the world's all perfect.

I won't take the bait.

But I'm not a coward.