7 - Killing My Heart

Nevaeh was smearing the angel wards on the side of the church when Dean started screaming.

It set Castiel's teeth on edge - an odd saying, but he understood it - and he waited impatiently for her to get the rest. Of course there were four on the outside, so he had no choice but to listen and become increasingly furious. He felt his rage like a ball of heat wedged beneath his breastbone, and he decided to channel it. Nathanael knew he was coming anyway; there was so surprise to be had.

As soon as the last ward vanished he blasted the door, the energy making it explode into splinters and clearing the way inside the church. As soon as he stepped through the threshold, he felt a surge of energy, and looked around to find the mostly empty church had several sigils painted in blood on the inside, including ones meant to heighten an angel's power. Ironically enough, Castiel felt them working on him too.

"Cass-Cass," Nathanael said, full of false cheer and poorly concealed contempt. He was in the vessel of a middle aged man with light brown hair and a trim build, with streaks of blood running from his eyes, and what looked like burnt patches of skin on his cheeks, hallmarks of a vessel reaching its absolute limit. "Long time no see. You look different than your last vessel. More male-y, huh? Looks good on you."

Dean was chained down to the altar, virtually the only thing left in the church. Nathanael had drawn a sigil in blood on his forehead, and even though Castiel didn't have a good look at it from here, he was sure it was one allowing him to have a complete mental hold on him. He was essentially slaved to Nathanael's mind, and whatever befell him would befall Dean too. There were so many symbols that Sam and Dean didn't know about that he had never told them. Because sometimes, you needed to keep secrets. But it added a complication, as he needed to get that sigil off of Dean before he could do anything to Nathanael.

"Free him now," Cas demanded. He wanted to physically rip his head off. No, it wouldn't kill Nathanael, but it would feel good. And it might give some mercy to the vessel, which was most likely dead and rotting.

Nathanael put his hand on Dean's chest. "You mean him? Your precious Dean-o? I don't think so. I mean, you look like you want to kill me, Cass-Cass."

"The nickname is incredibly irritating."

"It is, isn't it? That's why I like it." Castiel saw the hand Nathanael had on Dean's chest start to glow, and he didn't want to see what he intended to do.

With the sigils on the ceiling artificially boosting his meager power supply, he was in front of Nathanael in less than a heartbeat, and shoved him. It was meant to be a harmless gesture, unable to hurt Dean in any way, but he forgot about the power boost, and he sent Nathanael flying through the back of the church. Dean jolted as if shocked, but it still wasn't a fatal blow.

He moved to wipe the bloody sigil off Dean's forehead, but he immediately discovered it wasn't written on him. It was carved into his forehead. The blood was fresh, and all his own. Nathanael may have been crazy, but he remained crafty too. Damn it.

The millisecond before he could heal him, Nathanael came flying back through the broken wall of the church and slammed into Castiel like an angelic wrecking ball. He sailed back until he impacted with the only pew left in the church, which collapsed into kindling under his weight. "Did you really think I was going to make it that easy on you? Have you forgotten who you're dealing with?"

Castiel stood up, mentally running through a list of things that he could do to Nathanael that might not severely hurt Dean. Could he incapacitate him long enough to get the mark off Dean? It wouldn't take long. He wouldn't even have to completely heal him. Partial would be enough.

And Nathanael knew that as well as he did. Damn it.

"What the hell is going on in here?" A man asked. He had an absurdly over sized handgun, and an expression on his face like he didn't understand a single thing.

He also got hit on the back of the head almost immediately and fell down in the doorway. Sam appeared behind him, and upon seeing Nathanael, he pulled out his angel blade. "Sam, wait," Castiel said. He glanced over at him briefly, but kept his eyes mainly on Nathanael, which was smart. "He's marked Dean so that whatever we do to him, Dean will suffer the same injury."

Now he had Sam's undivided attention. "What?"

Nathanael let out a deeply artificial laugh, and put his hand on Dean's chest. "You didn't tell him about our bag of tricks, did you? You think angels are benevolent creatures, boy? We're as ancient as fuck, and we don't appreciate ticks like you painting us as fluffy little lapdogs who clean up after your shit. You are parasites on this Earth, and you've given us ample reason to never give a fuck about you or your kind ever again."

Sam shrugged, conceding the point. "Don't care. Let him go."

Nathanael sneered at him. "Or what? You gonna get me with your little pigsticker there? Newsflash, sunshine - kill me, kill your bro. But maybe that makes it easier on you, huh? Get to live your own life, free of your suffocating asshole of a brother."

"You can't win this fight," Castiel said. Which was true, even though he still had no idea how he was going to free Dean before they could kill him. Maybe, if Sam could distract him, Castiel could heal Dean and they could be done with this. While he honestly had enough angel blood on his hands to last him three or four more eons, Castiel really wanted to stab Nathanael through whatever passed for his withered and gnarled heart.

Nathanael turned his leer on him. "Can't I, though? You're not gonna hurt your precious honey bun here, and I doubt the human is gonna risk his big bro either. Hey, human, you know how we die, right? I mean, you got an angel blade, I assume you know how we die. If I do, your brother is going to spontaneously combust. Isn't that crazy? But it's the closest approximation of how we die. Part of me kind of wants to see it, not gonna lie."

Sam glanced at Castiel for confirmation, but Castiel could only dip his head. He didn't know for a fact that would happen, he'd never see an angel connected to a human die, but it made a strange sort of logical sense. Angels were energy beings, consumed by their own energies. Spontaneous human combustion probably was the closet translation.

"What do you want?" Sam asked. He hadn't put away the angel blade, but the odds of him using it were impossible to calculate, as they went into negative numbers.

"What do I want? Hmm, what do I want?" Nathanael made a show of thinking about this, stroking his chin, and leaving deep furrows in the flesh of his face. He wasn't sure if that was intentional or accidental. "Tell me, Cass-Cass, what is it with this bloodline? They're angel vessels, aren't they?"

"You know the answer to that."

"I do! I do indeed. Thanks for bringing them by, by the way. You're a pal."

"So you're not torturing your vessel on purpose," Sam said. "You're just falling apart."

"These people are weak. They don't have your genes." He squinted at Sam, like he was far away, even though it was an unnecessary affectation. "Holy shit! You were a Lucifer vessel?!" He did that irritating laugh again. Which was the whole point of it. He doubted Nathanael had anything close to a sense of humor. "Goddamn! You could probably hold a whole host of lesser angels before you exploded like a meat balloon." He stroked Dean's chest in a very creepy way. "Goddamn! And he's the Michael sword? I've hit the mother-lode!" He laughed again. "The damage I could do in this boy! I'll finally get my pure Earth after all."

"Take me," Sam said, putting his angel blade in his pocket and stepping inside the church.

"Sam, no," Castiel said. Was he serious, or was he trying to buy time? It was unclear; he had a better read on Dean's emotions than Sam's, for obvious reasons. Dean thought he was the emotionally reserved of the two of them, but far from it. Dean, to borrow another human expression, wore his heart on his sleeve, covered with a thin skin of bluster that anyone who knew him could see through like an x-ray. Sam was actually more of a tough read, as he considered things quietly, more internal than external. When Sam's emotions truly showed themselves, he was either unguarded or in a very low place.

"You think you can't do damage with me?" Sam said, walking farther into the church. Castiel simply watched and waited. If Sam gave him an opening, he would take it. "I was Lucifer's vessel. I was Azazel's weapon."

"That's close enough," Nathanael said. He was intrigued, that was obvious, and Castiel didn't like that. "So you've had a demon in you too? Fascinating. You're like a rental car, or a cheap hooker? Any port in a storm?"

Sam frowned at that. "I can do a hell of a lot more than him."

"Mm-hmm. And this isn't a ploy to, say, get me distracted so Cass-Cass can save your bro, and make me explode you, is it?" At Sam's confused look, Nathanael added, "Oh, I'm not taking you up on your offer. I'm going to make your eyeballs explode in their sockets, so you die horribly while I kick the shit out of your guardian angel over there, who's too terrified of hurting his boy here. Isn't it funny? Angels are supposed to be above lesser being things, like feelings, but Cass-Cass has a whole barrel full of them. Don't you Cassie?" Nathanael put a hand on Dean's throat. "See, he wouldn't like it if I hurt you, but he is absolutely livid at the idea of me hurting golden boy here. "

"I'm not a fan of yours either," Sam said.

Was Nathanael smiling? It was hard to say. He was doing it poorly. He was showing all his teeth like a snarling dog. "Oh, that wounds me. An insect not knowing its betters. If I gave a shit, that would really sting." Nathanael quickly turned his eyes on Castiel. The whites of his vessel's eyes were filled with blood. Castiel wondered if the power boosting sigils were causing the vessels to degrade at a much more rapid pace. There was always a price to pay when using these symbols. "No, Cassie, don't even think about it. I'll crush his throat before you get anywhere near me."

"Kill Dean and there's no reason for us not to kill you," Sam pointed out.

Yes, this was reeking of a so called Mexican standoff. Nathanael had grabbed a hostage, but now couldn't think his way out of the situation. He never was very good at strategy. "Okay, boy, you want your brother back in one piece? Kill Cassie, and I'll leave. You and your brother can walk out of here."

"Uh huh. Do you honestly think I'm that stupid?" Sam replied.

"Oh heavens yes. You're here, aren't you? And you thought you could win a fight with me. A celestial being. Return to the water you came from, tadpole. You 're outclassed here." Nathanael made a flicking gesture with his hand, and Sam went flying out of the church.

Castiel made his move then, tackling Nathanael and sending them both out of the church, into a barren field out behind it, that functioned as an ad hoc graveyard. He intended to slip the angel cuffs on him, but before he could, Nathanael kicked him back, and hopped up to his feet, holding his own angel blade. Castiel assumed he was going to use it on him, but to his horror, Nathanael turned it on himself, holding the point to the base of his own throat. "Come on, what does this piece of shit Neanderthal mean to you exactly, Cassie? I don't get it. I mean, the mouth on him. And his brain! Jesus. Don't you want to smite the hell out of him, bring him back, and do it again? I know I want to."

"If you hate humanity so much, why didn't you join with Lucifer?"

"That asshole? Please. Thought he was better than the rest of it, when he was a whiny pissy pants little baby. He was the worst of us. No better than humans."

Castiel couldn't argue with that, and wouldn't even if he disagreed, which he didn't. He also didn't add that Lucifer, as deranged as he was, probably wouldn't have accepted his help. There were some kinds of crazy that were impossible to deal with.

"So what's the play here, Cass-Cass? You can't hurt me without hurting your precious Dean-o. But you can't let me stomp out Sammy like the bug he is, either. Gonna let me kill you?" Castiel glared at him as a response. "Okay. But you know this town worships me, right? I can thrown them at you and the tadpole. Can you kill all of them? Can he? 'Cause these people will definitely die for me. I can tell them to have their children attack!" He laughed again. "Can you imagine? What could those little sprogs do to any of us? But they will. To them I'm a god."

Castiel had been aware that Nevaeh, despite his specific warning, had returned, and was somewhere in the trees. But even he was surprised when she opened fire, and shot Nathanael in the back.