Hey y'all! I'm back with a new Swarkles oneshot. I know it's been a really freaking long time since I've updated Hold My Heart, but I'm kind of stuck with where to take that story next, so I'm hoping that writing these little snippets for Tales from the Fortress will get me back into the writing mood. This past semester has been stressful, but I think this upcoming one will be easier (at least January will be) so hopefully I will be writing more? Thanks to everyone who has stuck with me, and stuck with this fandom overall. It's pretty difficult to write for a show when you aren't getting any new material to work with.

So, here's the premise for this oneshot: I jumped on the Gilmore Girls bandwagon about a year ago, so I've been rewatching a lot of those episodes, and it struck me that the reason I am such a big Rory/Logan shipper is that they remind me of Barney/Robin. So I'm using GG as inspiration! The idea comes from episode 7x14, Farewell, My Pet. Hope you guys enjoy!

Ch 8

"Oh, you broke him. You broke him hard. You can open the gate, and he's not going to bolt. You can kick him with a spur, and he's not going to spook. You own him." - Paris Gellar, ep 7x14

Robin giggled watching Lily attempt to keep her rowdy children in order. Lily had invited her over to hang out, but Marshall had to handle an emergency at work, so the ladies were stuck watching the kids as they tried to relax with cappuccinos from the new coffeeshop on Long Island.

"Oh, laugh all you want Scherbatsky. You… witch with a B," Lily said with a smile.

"Hey, perks of being the awesome aunt, you get to hang out with the kids without actually dealing with the crap side of parenting," Robin chuckled.

Soon, Lily slipped out of the youngest child's bedroom, collapsing on the couch with her cup of coffee.

"Ugh, trying to get them all down for a nap is like herding cats. I think we've got about thirty minutes until the first one wakes up, so let's talk. Distract me from this zoo."

Robin giggled again. "It really is like a zoo here. Completely different from my place. Although, it does get pretty… animalistic… from time to time."

Lily laughed. "Oh, dirty. I love my kids, but they are pretty crazy. Your life is totally different, especially since it's just you and Barney. You broke that stallion a long time ago."

Robin's brow furrowed. "Broke? What do you mean?"

"You broke him, like a wild horse. You know, if you kicked him with a spur, he wouldn't spook. He's not the same Barney he used to be. He's a changed man."

Robin paused. "But… no, he hasn't changed. He's still the same Barney."

"Oh please, Robin. He's completely different. He's a married man. I mean, just a few years ago, we would have never even dreamed that Barney would ever be married and settled. But now, not only is he settled, but he actually likes it. And it's all because of you. You broke him."

"Huh." Robin nervously twisted the locket around her neck, the one that Barney had given her on their wedding day. She thought back on her marriage to Barney, about all the ways he had changed since they had gotten married. Just the other week, a group of young college girls had flooded the bar in short shorts and crop tops, dancing on the bar and getting as drunk as they could. And Barney barely even glanced. He couldn't take his eyes off of his wife, completely enraptured as she told him about her workday. Had she really broken him?

Robin was distracted for the rest of her visit with Lily, and the entire way home. She had told Barney when they were still engaged that she didn't want him to change too much, because he wouldn't be the man she fell for. But he had changed. Had he even noticed? She became worried as she thought about how Barney may have felt. He had always told her that he loved how she didn't mind his outrageous personality and promiscuous tendencies. Did he resent her for making him change his ways?

Finally, the cab rolled to a stop in front of their apartment building. Her heart was pounding as she trudged upstairs, opening the door to find her smiling husband on the couch.

"Robin, check this out! Remember that documentary about sumo wrestlers we were talking about a few weeks ago? It's on Netflix! Wanna order dinner from the Thai place on 15th street and watch a bunch of fat guys in diapers slam their bodies into each other?" He waggled his eyebrows at her with a goofy grin.

Robin just stared at him, dropping her keys in the bowl by the door. It was a Friday night, and he wanted to spend the evening on the couch with her, watching a documentary? Had he turned into Ted?

"Barney, um, can I ask you something?"

"Sure babe, what's up? How are Lily and the kids?"

She dropped onto the couch beside him, keeping her back ramrod straight. He noticed that she kept her hands in her lap, fidgeting the whole time.

"Did I break you?"

Barney stared at her for a second before laughing. "You mean last night? I think I heard something pop, but nothing's broken. I'm definitely up for another round-"

"Not that, Barn. I mean, broken like a horse. If I kicked you with a spur, would you spook?"

Barney blinked, his expression unchanging. "Spurs? Yeah, I might be a little spooked, but I could dig it, if that's what you're into…"

"Barney, be serious! Look at us! We're spending a Friday night in our living room with takeout and a Netflix documentary. We're just a settled married couple. Doesn't that bother you?"

Barney thought for a second. "No. Wait, so am I the horse? You broke me, meaning you tamed me?"

"Well, yeah. Lily said that I broke you a long time ago. Was she right?"

Barney sighed. "Um, yeah, I guess. Is that such a bad thing? I mean, I like being settled. Yeah, I've changed, we both have. But I'm happy with it, as long as you are."

Robin settled back into the couch, swinging her legs over Barney's lap. "I'm happy, really. I just want to make sure you're okay. You said before we got married that you liked how I didn't make you change, but you have. You're not the same guy that you were just a few years ago. Do you… belong to me?"

Barney reached his arm out, pulling her closer into him. "Scherbatsky, I've always belonged to you. Getting married just made it legal. Remember what I told you in Splitsville? You've got a hold on my heart that I couldn't break if I wanted to. You're my best friend, Robin, and I would much rather be sitting on my couch with my best friend than out partying and having a bunch of meaningless hookups."

Robin smiled. "Thanks Barn. I needed to hear that. I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it." She reached her hand up, cupping his face and rubbing her fingers through his hair. He leaned into her touch, sending a warmth throughout her body.

They sat like that for a few minutes, eyes closed, enjoying each other's touch. Then, Barney's eyes flipped open.

"Now, about the spurs…"

"We were having such a nice moment…"

"Do they come with chaps?"

"Jesus Christ."

"'Cuz you would look good in chaps. Just the chaps, nothing else."

"Just quit while you're ahead, B."

"I think I could handle the spurs if you had some chaps. And a whip. Don't rodeo people have whips?"

Robin chuckled. "Let's get back to those sumo wrestlers, shall we?"

"Talk dirty to me, Scherbatsky."