Enjoy ;).

Previously in The Fact in the Lie:

She looked at their hands. Hers, light and long; his, darker and more square. So different; but they fit together so well. Arching her eyebrows at the analogy, she looked at him. "Okay. I'll try to remember that."

Chapter 7

They were sitting in the waiting room in the fertility clinic. After their dinner a few days ago, Booth had refrained from starting any new conversations about the subject as well as pushing her on what the impact was on their partnership, on them. However, he had continued to spend time with her, as much as she would allow, in an effort to try and make sure she knew that this didn't change anything for him. Booth found that he still had feelings for her and even though he hadn't wanted to be too obvious about them, when she had told him about her appointment, he had asked her if he could come with her and she had confirmed that she wanted him there. She actually wanted him there, to support her. It made him feel useful, grateful that he could help. When the nurse entered the waiting room and called out her name, he encouragingly squeezed her hand and together they rose from the cold uncomfortable chairs, typical for waiting rooms.

Brennan heaved a big sigh that did not release any of her nervous tension. She had long ago sought out Booth's comfort, taking his hand and gripping it tightly. Now, she rested her heavy head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. Booth pressed a kiss to her hair, and she smiled slightly. Then, her name was called and Booth pulled her up, following the nurse into the doctor's exam room. Her grip on Booth's hand tightened. Why was she nervous for this? The outcome of this examination wouldn't change anything for her. She did not want kids! She didn't! She didn't care if her body was able to accommodate a conception. She didn't. The thing she wasn't comfortable with, however, was for others to see her scars. To somehow confirm they were there. And that was exactly what she was going to allow to happen today.

Booth could feel her grip on his hand tightening as they rose. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and together they followed the nurse into the waiting room. The nurse told them the doctor would be with them in a minute and left with a polite smile. Booth turned to his partner and gently rubbed her upper arms, looking into her eyes. He could feel the tension in her body, letting him know how nervous she really was. He wanted to tell her to relax, but knowing the importance of this doctor's visit and the details of the circumstances that had taken this away from her, silenced him. After a few moments he simply took a step towards her, wrapped his arms around her waist, pulled her body against his, offered silent reassurance.

She leaned against him, closing her eyes, letting him hold her. After a few moments, she took a shuddering breath and braced herself. She slowly pulled away and nodded towards him. She was okay. She'd be fine. The doctor happened to walk in at that moment and he shook their hands, introducing himself as Balraj Singh Bindra. He seemed like a kind, Indian doctor, who invited them to sit with a slight bow and large arm gesture. They sat.

Sitting down, Booth moved his chair so he could reach out and hold her hand in his. The doctor was looking at them expectantly and Booth tenderly moved his thumb across the back of her hand, silently encouraging her to speak up. Remembering her words about fearing to be placed back into foster care, he turned to face her and looked her in the eye, nodding slowly, wanting her to realize that she was never going to be treated like that again, not as long as he had a breath of air in his lungs.

Booth was being very supportive, and she appreciated that. Thanks, her expression said, and then she turned to the doctor. "We spoke on the phone. I'm here to determine whether or not I'm biologically able to have children."

The doctor folded his earth-coloured hands on the table in front of him and nodded towards her. "Yes. Would you please tell me why you doubt your fertility? Have you been trying to accomplish pregnancy for a long time?"

Brennan blushed and glanced at Booth, understanding the doctor's assumption. "No," she finally replied. "I - When I was seventeen I was infected with bacteria and at the time, the doctor told me I had scarring due to the inflammation to such an extent that I would not be able to have children." She paused.

"I see," the doctor said patiently. Brennan continued. "And now I would like a second opinion. I mean, I want to know how bad it is and whether there's anything that can be done about it," she spoke strongly.

Squeezing her hand, Booth continued to look at her, silently encouraging her to tell the doctor the entire story. Well maybe not the entire story, but the part about being raped seemed pretty important to Booth, as well as the fact that she had said she hadn't been able to move for about a week and had healed from the assault by laying in bed. When she didn't immediately speak up, he turned towards the doctor. "I'm sorry, but could we have a moment, please?" The doctor nodded and they exited the room. Before he closed the door, Booth assured the doctor they would return in a few minutes. After they had left the room, Booth turned to his Bones. "Bones, I know this must be hard to talk about and I'm not saying you have to go into detail, but I think you need to tell him more about what happened to you."

She was rigid in his grasp as he loosely had his hand on her arm. She glanced around as though trying to find an exit. "I was going to let him observe objectively. What does it matter that I was raped?" she whispered, getting close to his face.

Booth was about to tell her the doctor would be more gentle and patient with her if he knew, but he decided to go for the rational approach. "Bones, he does this for a living, do you really think he won't be able to figure it out for himself?"

She looked at him, her expression stubborn. "No. I do not see the point in him knowing."

"Well, what are you going to tell him if he asks you to describe the way you got the infection? What if he wants to know the amount of pain you were in?" Booth shook his head, "How is he supposed to come to a diagnosis without all the facts? You would never do that, how can you expect another doctor to do it?"

She held up her hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. I'll tell him. Some." She turned quickly and opened the door. "My partner thinks it's important that you know I got the infection from a rape and I did not receive any medical treatment. I - I - That's it," she said brusquely, and only then sat back down, her fingers curling around her hands.

As he walked into the room again and walked past her, he squeezed her shoulder before he sat back down and entwined their fingers. She hadn't quite put it the way he would've put it, but at least it was out there and he felt proud she had been able to tell the doctor.

Doctor Singh Bindra looked at her a while in respectful silence. "I am sorry that happened to you, Dr Brennan. If there is anything I can do to make you more comfortable, please do not hesitate to let me know."

Brennan nodded her head once. "Thank you. Do you need to know anything else?" This was said halfly to Booth.

Deciding that maybe he should just add the part where she had spent a week in bed, unable to move. He knew how much she would hate to admit that, so he added, "Maybe it would help the doctor to know that you were in a lot of pain for quite some time?"

Brennan gave him an exasperated look to save her reputation, but secretly she found it sweet; the way he was concerned for her well-being. She glanced at the doctor, then at the desk. "I lay in bed for a week because -" her eyes snapped back up to the doctor. Why was she avoiding his gaze like she was ashamed? She wasn't, damn it! "I couldn't move because of the pain. I passed out a lot. And later,when I - Sometimes it still hurts a little during intercourse." She was so not meeting Booth's eye, but even if the doctor couldn't help with the fertility issue, maybe he could help her with the pain issue.

Booth tensed at her revelation and he felt a bit better about having pushed the issue, realizing that he never would've known this little bit of information if he hadn't convinced her to be completely honest to her doctor. Coming to the conclusion that this was neither the place nor the time to talk about this, he remained silent. No wonder she talks about sex the way she usually does. In her experience it probably is only about getting physical satisfaction as quickly as possible. Giving her body what it needs. Booth filed away the piece of information and the conclusions he had come to, to discuss it with her at a more appropriate time.

Doctor Singh Bindra nodded thoughtfully. "If I can help you, I will, Dr Brennan."

Brennan took a breath. "Okay. Can we start?" The doctor pointed to a curtain behind which was the exam table. "Of course. Please change behind the curtain and let me know when you are ready." She got to her feet and disappeared behind the curtain, taking a few breaths to calm herself, wondering why she did not want to take her clothes off. He was a doctor, a professional, just like herself. But ever since those memories had resurfaced, she felt vulnerable without her clothes on. And she hated that feeling. Nevertheless, she was a rational being and knew the exam would be for her own benefit. So she changed into the hospital gown and sat on the edge of the bed. "I'm ready," she announced.

Booth wanted to follow the doctor, but his sense of modesty confined him to his chair. Yes, they were partners and yes, he knew what had happened to her. He was the only one who knew, well except the doctor of course, and he didn't know any of the details. But still... he wasn't really sure what she wanted from him. He knew what he wanted. He wanted to join them and hold her hand and look in her eyes and convince her that she was doing the right thing. Instead, he sighed and sat back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest, forcing himself to stay seated. Hoping that she would simply call out to him if she wanted him there.

Doctor Singh Binda entered and closed the curtain behind him. Brennan lay back on the table and the doctor got ready. She kept her gaze focused on the ceiling, so many thoughts flying through her head that she couldn't tell what she was thinking. She had her hands folded on the slight indentation just below her ribcage, letting the doctor position her legs. She wondered whether she wanted Booth in there or if she'd be more comfortable on her own. Well, she could always call out to him. He was just on the other side of the curtain, after all.

"I will perform a transvaginal ultrasound to visualise the scarring. Are you ready for me to start?"

She kept her eyes on the ceiling and nodded. Doctor Singh Binda worked gently, and despite the sensations being uncomfortable, it didn't hurt. He was watching the images of her genital tract with a frown of concentration on his face. She dared not even glance at the screen. Why was he being silent? Or did it only seem as if he was? Then, she felt him go deeper. As he pushed the device against that one spot that hurt her during sex, she gasped in pain and grabbed the sides of the exam table. Immediately, the doctor stopped.

"That's a scar," he told her.

As her gasp was heard clearly throughout the entire room, Booth sat up right and only held himself back with the knowledge that she was strong and would call for him if she needed his help. When he heard the doctor's comment, he felt his anger intensify towards the bastard of a foster father who had taken advantage of a young insecure girl. When she didn't call his name, he took a deep breath and forced himself to relax his muscles again.

What the doctor said next, horrified her.

"And I am afraid I need to push a little bit further. I am sorry. Would you like me to get Mr Booth to distract you?"

She looked disbelievingly at him. Push further? That was impossible! Excruciating. She had allowed no one to push further once they'd touched that spot. And how was Booth supposed to help her through this? He couldn't take away the pain, she thought indignantly. But then, she had come this far and she was getting it done. She nodded her head, wondering whether Booth would be so kind to punch her in the temple so she'd lose consciousness for a while. "Yes."

Booth rose as soon as he heard her answer. It wasn't like he had been eavesdropping, but a curtain was certainly not enough to ensure a private conversation. He wasn't really sure how he would distract her yet, but he knew he would find a way. He pushed the curtain back and made eye contact with her as soon as he could. He approached her and reached for her hand. He curled his fingers around hers and looked into her eyes. "I'm here, Bones." Booth kept his voice calm and reassuring as he looked at her. He hadn't been sure how he was supposed to distract her, but as soon as he carefully sat down on the bed, he knew what he wanted to say to her. He gently brushed his knuckles over her cheek. "You are so strong and beautiful, Bones. You have no idea how brave you really are."

Not very brave, she finished in her head. How could he even say such things when she was lying here in this position, sweat lining her forehead? The doctor offered Booth a stool, and he took it, not letting go of her hand. She gripped his tightly.

He sat down on the stool the doctor had handed him and chuckled mirthlessly as he turned towards her. "You don't believe a word I've said, do you?" He leaned closer and pressed his lips to her cheek. "It's true, though. You are so strong, so determined to fight for the truth. So brave. Fearless even. And yes, I know that there are things that do scare you, but you don't let them control your life." He squeezed her hand and sat back. "I wish you could see what I see, Bones."

"I would be deceived because you are in love with me," she told him matter-of-factly.

"Is that really what you think is the reason I see all those things? Because I love you? Nah, Bones," he squeezed her hands, "I'm sure every single one of the families of the people whose body you identified would agree with me. You are relentless in your search for the truth, to give people back their voice. You are very brave and they would definitely agree with that." Booth continued to talk to her, engaging her in conversation, keeping the tone of the conversation as light and easy as he could, knowing the doctor was about to do something - he had no idea what exactly, but he knew it was probably going to be painful and he wanted her attention focused on him. Not on the doctor and what he was doing.

She couldn't help a slight smile as she shook her head at him. It was pointless to argue.

"Dr Brennan, are you ready for me to continue?" the doctor interrupted.

Her smile vanished and she braced herself as at the same time she tried to relax. "Okay." She felt the device move in slowly, but she tensed impossibly as the tip of it touched the scar. "Wait, wait. Please."

Even though he knew the doctor would wait, Booth couldn't help himself as he turned around and cast a warning look at the doctor, who had stopped moving. He turned back to his partner and looked into her eyes. "What's the matter, Bones?"

She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. "It's nothing. Never mind. Go on." It was physical pain. She could overcome that. Her hand found his and tucked it under her chin. She closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing.

He gently squeezed her hand, "Bones, look at me please." When she did what he had asked, he spoke softly, "It's not nothing." He could understand her need to compartmentalize, but he was reluctant to allow her to withdraw. He also realized that this wasn't the most opportune time to push her. "Are you sure you're ready?"

She sighed. "No, it's not nothing. But it has to be done. And it's just a pain. I can handle it, I just need to be prepared."

"Are you sure you're ready?" he quietly asked her. When he felt her squeeze his hand, he softly caressed her cheek. He looked into her eyes, smiling slowly. "You have to tell me what the secret ingredient is in your Mac 'n Cheese." He hoped he would be able to distract her.

She glanced at the doctor as a sign to tell him she was ready. A second later, she felt the pressure inside her increase, and her face contorted. "Never," she told Booth through clenched teeth.

"Awe, come on, Bones! If you tell me how to make your Mac 'n Cheese, I'll tell you how to make my grilled cheese sandwishes." He waggled his eyebrows as he gently squeezed her hand, trying to distract her, but simultaneously letting her know he was taking her pain seriously.

"I'd rather have you make me those," she groaned. The pain between her legs became nearly unbearable and she tried desperately to relax. "Will you make them today?" Focus, she told herself. Focus on grilled cheese.

"Of course I will. You know what? We'll watch a movie and I'll make us some grilled cheese sandwiches. What do you think?" He tried to occupy her mind, asking her questions, knowing she'd use the opportunity to keep herself distracted from what the doctor was doing.

"What -" she clenched her jaw, sweat covering her forehead, "movie?" Doctor Singh Binda might as well have been torturing her with a knife. As if he was stretching the sensitive scar until it broke. Finally, it did break. Or at least it felt like she'd been tore apart. She yelped and covered her mouth with her hands, falling back into the exam table feeling deeply unhappy.

"I am so sorry," the doctor said, "I caused a small tear, but I had to. We have a clear picture now. Please hang in for just a little while longer, it is almost done."

Brennan nodded her head, unable to speak, still pressing her hands to her mouth. It was almost done. Almost over.

Booth gently caressed her auburn curls, whispering soothing nonsense to her, hoping to be able to keep her calm enough so she was able to finish the exam. He couldn't even imagine the pain she had been through and was going through. But he knew one thing: he was going to be there for her. She had been through enough, she had been hurt and abandoned enough and he would not add himself to the list of people who had hurt her so deeply. He felt grateful towards her for telling him, for giving him yet another reason to stay. He pressed a soft kiss to her hair, feeling his guts clench at the mere thought that he would've left her if she hadn't confided in him. She deserved better and he was going to make sure she received the caring love and devotion she deserved.

Just when the nausea and lightheadedness from the pain were wearing her out to the point where she couldn't take it anymore, she felt the instrument being removed. She'd been holding her breath and lying as still as possible. Now, she breathed out. And in. And out. And noticed doctor Singh Binda put the instrument on the tray before he retrieved a disinfectant wipe. There was blood on the long, narrow white piece of technology. Her blood. A horrendous sight. She averted her head and looked at Booth, heaving a big sigh. "He's done," she said, relieved.

Booth simply nodded, his attention focused on the incredible strong woman in front of him. "I suppose I best let you get dressed then?" He didn't really want to leave her side, but after what had just happened, after she'd been through such a painful examination, he thought she might want to leave the hospital as soon as possible. He continued to caress her hair, reluctant to end their physical contact.

"Dr Brennan, you may get dressed. I will review the ultrasound at my desk and when you join us, I will be able to give you an answer, I hope."

The doctor left the area closed off by the curtain, and once they were alone, Brennan swung her arms around Booth's shoulders, pulling him tightly against her. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," she said in a hushed voice in his ear, then kissed his cheek. She was so grateful for his support, for his - seemingly infinite love for her. She just couldn't seem to be able to scare him away. Slowly, she was beginning to gather faith that he might be the one who stayed.

As she wrapped her arms around him, he returned her embrace, holding her close to him. "Hey, you don't need to thank me, Bones. I was glad you wanted me here." He hesitated before he tenderly squeezed her body in his arms. "Are you okay, Temperance?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah. I'm okay." She wasn't feeling her best, but she was, indeed, okay. She let go of him and lowered herself to the floor. Her bare feet met with the cold linoleum, but the room was warm enough.

He nodded his head as well and rose from the stool he had been sitting on. "I'll let you get dressed." Slightly reassured that she was somewhat okay, he reached for the curtain. When she didn't stop him, he disappeared behind the curtain and joined the doctor. A few minutes later, she walked back out and joined them.

Brennan lowered herself into the chair with difficulty that she tried to mask with a polite smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "So," she said nervously, "what are your findings?" She twisted her fingers in her lap as she looked expectantly at the doctor, who in turn fixed his gaze on his computer screen.

"Mm, yes. Well. You can come take a look if you want."

Booth hadn't missed the brief flash of pain in her eyes and the fake smile she had used to cover it up. "Why don't you go take a look, Bones?" Booth hoped it would further distract her from the pain she was in and a part of him believed that it would be benificial in the long run if she finally faced her secret. Quite literally. If she could no longer have kids, it would give her some closure and if she still was able to conceive, it would be helpful to start the process of accepting what had happened to her and to adress her reluctancy to have children of her own.

Brennan nodded and pushed herself up off the armrests of the chair. She rounded the desk with clenched fists to distract her from the pain. Doctor Singh Binda explained what she was seeing on the screen, and pointed out the scarred patches on her genital tract and endometrium - the lining of the uterus. The latter, fortunately, was mostly intact. Her eyes hardened as she focused on the spots that represented her scars. It looked bad, but at the same time it was not as bad as she'd imagined. "Can you do something about any of these?" she asked him, building up to the Big Question. Doctor Singh Binda's response sped up her heartrate and made her feel slightly light-headed.

"Oh, definitely."

Focus on cheese sandwiches. You can't say we're not original, now ;).

So, a pretty intense chapter. What are your thoughts? And does this mean Brennan could still conceive in a natural way? Please stay tuned to find out.

To those of you celebrating: Happy Easter!