I'm verily truly sorry for not updating. Guess you have to wait longer. I'm really, really sorry but I lost my writing skills and I have to improve. So, here's a preview. I didn't change this much. I'm really sorry guys!

Disclaimer: Kuroshitsuji is Yana Toboso's.

Episode Five:

That Butler, Unsure

Part 3: Bardroy

It was one of those days that he was sitting respectfully at a rug while examining food that the slaves clad in silk saris brought out. It was one of those days that he was sitting with his father, who was just across him, the ruler of Bengal.

It was not one of those days that his ancient-looking father threw a look of deep contempt as he said these words:

"I do not deserve a disloyal son like you."

A pause.

He could only stare in astonishment. His father then clapped his hands briskly. Two armed men came out, dressed in bright Indian clothes with turbans on top of their heads. They pointed their spears at the boy in acknowledgment. "Throw that dog out" was his firm order.

Before he could react, a man with light-blond hair immediately threw him out of the way as he untangled the bandages in his right hand.

"AGNI NO!!" He screamed as that man let out dancing flames and controlling them all with ease.

It was one of those days where everything, the palace, the panicking servants, his father vanished, with a musty room appeared from his sight and only the visage of the man who saved him he saw, wearing the same anxious look like the people in his dream.

"Are you all right, my prince?"

"Are you truly all right prince?"

"For the last time Agni it's just a nightmare!"

Robin Hood's Bay is a small fishing town located five miles south of North Yorkshire. A quaint little village with green rolling fields stretching a few miles and embraced by the foreign sea is but a facade of what this place really is.

Three people were briskly walking in the tortuous road leading downhill. Carriages would occasionally pass by, but it didn't provide any trouble. People would steal glances at the two foreigners accompanying the girl, but it would only be few. After all, it had already been five days they had first set foot in the town.

"Be quiet!" said the girl, taking of her big round spectacles and putting it inside the pocket of her coat. "We've already drawn enough attention." She then gave them a long cold look.

They could only shrink back.

Their steps slowed as they passed a small restaurant near the coast, and quickly began walking again.

"That's the place right? That's where he's staying?" asked Soma, who was scratching his arm and itching to take his English clothes off.

Maylene nodded.

"We'll visit him after dark. We don't want any attention and-" She showed the inside of her coat, where, inside was a gun's silhouette.

"Ready your weapons. I think Mr. Bard won't go with us without a fight."

"What are you doing?"

She could only look in bewilderment as Soma began running to the sand.

"What are you two doing?"

Her tone wasn't angry. It was irritated, since the prince, was happily splashing his butler with sea water.

"Aww Maylene! At least have some fun before the big night~!" He teased as he beckoned his butler to build a sandcastle.

Maylene only let out a deep sigh of exasperation. So much for being strict...

Before she knew it, her buttocks touched the soft sand, and she let herself watch both her companions enjoy the sun.

"You don't like this place too much."

She turned her head to see the other Indian beside her.

"Instead of tottering here idly, we should've made more preparations!" she snapped.

"..."

"..haha... HAHAHA!"

"What's so laughable all of a sudden?"

"It's a well-said statement," he wiped the tears off his eyes and once more stared at the horizon. Gulls would occasionally filter, but the unpredictable beauty of the azure sea shone through.

"Agni, stay there okay?" Soma's holler was two yards away.

"Jo ajna" Agni bowed low.

Silence then ticked by. Maylene occasionally let the sand run through her pale porcelain hands while Agni continued to stare ahead at his master. The air ran cold around the two.

Maylene noticed this. "For a nineteen year-old, he doesn't act the right age," she said staring at the prince's direction.

"He's still a child inside. But like your master, he already experienced too much."

She let the peace get the better of her. She still hadn't remembered what happened to the young master. Before she knew it, she slid her fingers across each other's arms. She let a shiver run through her spine.

"You're cold." Agni looked with concern at the ex-maid and proceeded placing his palms on her own.

"What is this?" said Maylene out loud, as her cheeks turned a red tinge.

He smiled at her. "Let's just say it's a way to keep warm."

It did. It only needed a few seconds, and before she knew it, she could feel the warmth between her toes.

"Mr. Agni?" she said finally, her blush getting redder and redder.

"What is it?" He didn't seem to have noticed.

"What really happened before? What I've heard, master Soma was kicked from his own house..."

He didn't put his palms on hers any longer and returned it to his knees as he turned once more at the boats that shifted their way to the dock.

"His father," his smile was erased from his face. "...disowned him."

"Why?" She turned her compassionate gaze at Agni's.

"I do not have the answer to your question Miss Maylene." His reply was icy. "Perhaps we should talk about something else."

"I'm sorry then." She turned her head and let her hair caress the wind and stared at the glittering ocean before them. "Francis told me… that the ocean is a wonderful thing. He said that we'll see it together. But-" She felt her cheeks moisten.

A hand then dabbed her eyes. She looked up and saw him, serenely smiling at her. "Someday perhaps."

She placed her right hand on his. "Yeah."

The moon was a glowing crescent, a pale croissant amidst the star-spiked evening sky. From here, lamps of candle light envelop the streets, giving the needed warmth from the blue-tinged road, and probably the three's, as they walked down it.

"Get ready." Maylene warned as they went down, down to the dark sign with the name 'Miller's Pub' painted on the front door. Her shotgun was already raised as she picked the door. The others merely nodded, their calm demeanour already faded hours ago.

Creak...

The door lay ajar as they went inside, carefully counting their steps, contemplating what their next move will be. They moved and acted like mice, occasionally pausing to catch their breath.

Step! Step! Step!

Who was the one making that annoying sounds? Maylene turned her head at their comrades. They returned her puzzled look.

Step! Step! Step!

It wasn't them who were stepping so loud.

Step! Step! Step!

If it wasn't them... then...

Step! Step! Step!

Who was it?

"Ahh... so the rumours are true. You are Maylene and Prince Soma righ'?"

The one who said it was the voice they knew so well.

"Mr. Bardroy. Please come with us. No skirmishes I beg of you," said Maylene.

"And serve that sick psychopath like your master. Are you thinking I'm a fool Maylene?"

She immediately brandished two rifles underneath her black velvet coat. "Mr. Bard," she began coldly, retaining her assassin facade. "Either we calmly discuss this or," she aimed the two guns at his head. "We do it by force."

"Hmm... let's see..." The blond, clean-shaven American showed a small button under his shirt. "I guess I'm going with the latter." He then jabbed the button.

Maylene knew this was coming, but it was too late. A hole immediately appeared from below. She threw her coat up to catch the hook from the side as she hastily scooped her two companions.

"Oops..." Bard says with a smirk as he aimed a pistol at the coat. "I forgot about that hook." There were three bangs emitting from the gun.

"HOW SLOW!" She yelled before tumbling to oblivion.

Step. Step.

Bard stared coolly from the hole. "I might've softened up a bit Maylene." He grinned. "But- you're not coming back to that slug anymore. No way will we return." With a swish of his apron, he turns back to the back door.

"No way will I let that brat take control of me anymore, much less order me to kill."

"Miss Maylene."

That whisper... what is that whisper.

"Miss Maylene."

She doesn't... want to move.

"MISS MAYLENE!"

She woke up, her gun at the ready. Two pairs of eyes were staring at her. From the air, there was the faint smell of gunpowder.

"Thank goodness you didn't light up anything!" she exclaimed, stretching out her hands, yet only feeling the balmy touch of wood. "This crate's packed up with gunpowder."

"We recognize by the smell." Soma coughed, trying not to move an inch.

"We're completely surrounded Miss Maylene by the crates."

She cursed under her breath.

July 7, 1889

Heya! I'm not stupid or anything, you know acting ya exist and all but no choice anyway, since I've got no one else to talk to.

You know, the first thing I noticed when I stepped out of the Tower was that… the air's so fresh and cool. Hell, all I can smell there when we were holed up like hostages were our breaths, and I gotta tell you, it ain't pretty, accompanied by the stench of the doomed compares' with us inside . And luckily, we finally got the hell outta there.

When we were in that tower, I, Finni and Mey we didn't remember a damn of how we all got there. Heck, I even forgot that my name was Bard and my entire existence. When we woke up two years ago, and we were already inside those stinky stone walls. The guards kept their mouths shut when we asked, and I nearly often beat the hell out of them when I do. (Well, I always get slashed by the whip but the hell?)

Yet somehow, there was something that held us together. You know, there was this kinda bond between us, even bigger than friendship that kept us with each other. I don't understand (the hell can I) why, but I thanked that damn bond because if it weren't for it, we wouldn't have escaped.

There was this time of day when Lady Luck shined on our favor (or because the guards were more idiotic than us). I don't know and I don't care how but well a year before, there was a scuffle between two guards. They had too much to drink and were knocked in the head, I suppose. And… well I kinda took advantage of it and managed to- have the keys. Then Finni threw the dirty bowls where we eat our food on their heads, I opened the door and we made a run for it!

Damn, it was the first time in recent memory (and I didn't remember much about myself) that I surprised myself with that running. There was this kinda rush that made your feet keep going and going like there was no tomorrow. I kept the lead with Finni holding the unconscious Mey up the rear. And dang, it'll be no surprise with the entire goose chase we concocted that we were noticed (no, I guess mistaken will be a better term) to have escaped. We ran faster than ever as we went down, down the stairs while tearing up the guards with our 'weapons' (a rag, a piece of bone and the remaining bowl) and racing outside.

We ran and ran as far away as possible from the tower and darn, for all their coats and whatnot, the guards were sure fast! They were gaining on us. I had no choice but to say it.

"Let's split!" I cried as I rounded on a fork and Finni went through the other. Damn, I know it was a pretty stupid decision, and I lost the guards, yes, but I lost Finni and Mey too.

And you know what, the morning I awoke from my peaceful slumber, did I receive the greatest shock of my life. My head was kinda woozy, but images flooded back to me, images that seem to connect and piece together to form fragments upon fragments of memory. It made me remember my name, my past and the fire… a year ago.

I feel better if my memories didn't come back. Hell, I'm happier if I never knew my name or who I was. You know why?

Well my memories are back, yes, but they ain't pretty.

Even more when I remember a kid, that Ciel Phantomhive, who became my master before.

If it weren't for him, then…

Damn… I was his pet. I was his bloodthirsty, vicious pet. Finni and Mey too. We all were.

We killed and corrupted ourselves, all for the sake of him. Why?! Why, when he's no more than the- the Queen of Britain's dog?!!

And the fire… the fire that the guards couldn't stop talking about that raged about through London two years ago… I knew who or what did it.

Pluto. A demon dog we had. A tamed dog that without warning lashed out of control and reduced the great capital of England to ashes. And despite our silent protests, we had no choice but to kill it, from that Phantomhive's orders. And that was the last I saw of the earl.

Two years had passed, and there was still no news about him.

And from there, my legs couldn't take the shock and fear that was suddenly pushed inside my brain. No way, will I ever return there again. Hell… no way will I sacrifice lives for his protection. And no way will I ever let him break the bond I have with my wife.

July 10, 1889

I have been walking three days nonstop, trying to find that damn address of that dingy apartment we had.

I-am-not lost DAMMIT!!

It's just my mind doesn't remember things as much as it used to. Geez, the youth's so lucky. They still have their memories nailed on their brains like bullets against their targets, with boundless energy to boot.

And hey, I want to see my wife and my child again! Even though I know, well it might not be a much happy reunion, and I prepared myself for the worse. And though I'm an old geezer, I guess I can handle it.

I can now remember so well how I met my beloved Rosalind…

Oh, and if you think I'm this old romantic that can't even tell a nice love story then stop reading this, dammit! Yes, I'm talking to you reader, and to me from the future, since I know I'll laugh at myself as I grow old.

Okay, back to my tale. Well as you must know, I was just an immigrant from New England, and an illegal one at that. We also had no place there at our hometown, since my dad was a miner who died on the mines. I had my mother when I went here nearly thirty years ago, thinking of a better life. Oh damn was I wrong.

I never thought that our living here would be, harder. I couldn't find a job to support my ailing mother. We slept on the streets, scavenging food to get by. We were lucky even to have a decent meal once a day. I tried selling stuff, and no one bought anything from me at all. No one even gave a damn about us, from my mom to my companions.

Then there were the times when those people who say they uphold the 'law of the land' (probably the law of their asses) and round many of us when we were getting 'desperate'. It ain't a pretty sight if they do though, since a lot of us always put off a fight.

The time came when mother snapped. She ran around like some tra-la-la-ing dancer and was finally taken when she bumped into that pompous ******* officer and took her away. I knew she was weak, really weak, so she let herself be dragged away. Her toothless smile was the last thing I could remember, and the tears falling down from her cheeks. She probably knew there was no hope for her anyway, so she let herself be taken by them.

One of the biggest questions in my mind was why the hell did she left me all alone? Why did she not be the mother I knew, and gave a damn about my well-being, even for once?! Why would she let me be here suffering, than being there on the Americas? Damn, I hated it. I hated the wake-up call when we thought this place was Utopia. I hated it that dad died, and I never knew where he was. I hated it that I knew I was going to die, and I can't do something about it. Most especially, I hated that damn queen, for letting us live that way like we were **** to be cleaned.

Five years passed since we arrived on this stinking land and two years since mother was taken away when I met her. I continued selling creations, with no one even giving a glance at them. Then suddenly, as I was nodding off to sleep, someone began tapping my shoulder.

"Good day sir," someone said in a polite squeaky voice that could only be a child. I didn't take any more notice and continued dozing off.

"Er… How much is this?" I could still hear her courteous voice even then. Of course, my eyes flapped open in disbelief. She was gonna pester me even more if I let things go my way anyway.

The first thing I noticed though, were her clothes. She was wearing this white dress that showed her small figure perfectly. She also had those dainty black shoes. The dress seemed to be of expensive material, so it was obvious that she was a noble. Or a noble's daughter.

I first thought of brushing her off. I thought that all children of the upper-class people were brats who were demeaning as well as mini-sluts and bastards like their mommies and daddies. They often throw or toss my wares aside like their toys which they grew tired of playing with. I spent four years bitterly suffering this kind of discrimination.

The second thing I noticed was her eyes. The first thing they reminded me of were ice crystals.

But these crystals were warm.

Her small smile was even warmer.

"Sir?" she said, looking at me like I was some kind of idiot. Damn, I hate making a bad first impression. It'll stick for life!

"What do you want?" I said with my husky voice as I snapped back. I was losing a good image from her, and I hate it.

She then showed me a mini bird-like contraption (that looks more like boxes with a kinda glider and had the width that can fit snugly in my hands) that was one of the things I made on sale.

"What is this?" she asked at me.

"Well-" I started. I didn't want to sound stupid at introducing a creation of mine. "It's a mini-copter."

Her eyes then became wide-eyed with wonder. What a gullible girl was my thought.

"What's that?" She then asked, awestruck.

"It's a device that can fly," I then said, as I began twisting that pretzel-thing that I didn't give a damn of what it was. The small thin metal propellers at the back started to turn.

"Wow!" she then exclaimed as the device slowly ascended for a couple of feet, but then started to glide freely above our heads. "Incredible!"

For the three minutes it remained airborne, she couldn't take her eyes off that little machine. Hahaha! Someone finally recognized my genius!! It was for the first time I saw someone liked a creation I made, and somehow, It felt really fuzzy. I didn't experience that feeling at all since my last family was taken away from me.

"How much is it?!" She then asked in excitement as she caught the mini-copter with her two tiny hands.

"For today, it's free," I shrugged as I cleaned the store out of my creations. "I don't want money anyway." Half of it was true. I was just happy that someone gave a damn about a creation of mine and desired to buy it. Lucky her.

"Thank you!!" she then said as she toyed with her mini-copter and turned back. She then stopped. "Are… are you sure about not selling it to me?" she then asked with that innocent smile.

"Geez, I told you already! It's fine!!"

"What about your master? The one who made this?"

"I'm the one who made it you know. Now scram!"

She began to turn once more when she looked at me, with her smile.

"Thank you a lot."

Sigh. Someone was admiring me…

"Yeah. Come back if you want more," I said as I prepared myself for a nap and leaned against the wall of the apartment.

"I will!!" She then said as she waved goodbye.

I spat on the floor in acknowledgement. Hey! I was sleepy then and she had the nerve to wake me up!

Yet then, despite the boredom and droopy eyes I had, it made me glad that I didn't shoo her away. Somehow though, but I didn't realize it yet.

That I had fallen for that trap.

'Love'.

Ick.

Well, it made me kinda tired and all so, good night.

July 11, 1889

Well, it's kinda obvious that I'm walking again ya know! And now, I think I am lost. But anyway, let me continue.

I was dozing off again as usual. Well, it was pretty hot and I had no choice-!

I was under the table and murmuring the name of my mother when she appeared.

This time, she brought food.

Yeah! Call me a street rat if you will but I my stomach cried out to me, begging me to take that basket holding food!

She then took a top I made and told me that the small cakes inside the picnic basket were her payment and ran off. Who would I be to refuse? I shared it with my mates, and they were pretty happy.

I'm gonna speed things up a bit, since my hands are growing sore of using only my fingers to write (I lost the quill I had taken from a rubbish heap if you may ask).

One lazy afternoon, after about the tenth time she continued giving me food in exchange of my 'creative' playthings, she introduced herself to me.

"Don't you want to ask me of my name dear sir?" she asked in that annoying shrill voice of hers.

"And why the hell would I like to know?" I said, folding my arms and muttering that she's as pompous as all those people living in their luxurious palaces.

"Because…" she then took my hand with her laced one. "I intend for you to come with me home."

And of course I quickly let go of her hand.

"Why should I go with you? To serve your family and do what every frivolous whim they want me to do?" On the other hand, it sounds much better than this hell hole.

"No," she said, with that grating smile of hers not leaving her face. "My sole intention, dear sir is to help you to study in school. My father intends for you to work in our watch-making business when you're older."

"I don't intend to leave my friends here alone," I said in protest. I don't want them to go from me. They were always there with me, even to my mother's death they remained with me.

She still remained composed.

"Then we'll let them live with us. They'll become servants of our households."

Heh. I really didn't want them to come. But I had no other choice. She looked trustful enough. And the situation we were in was hopeless. So, I told her 'fine'.

From there, we waved our handkerchiefs (if we had any) goodbye to the life on the street and into the life of service and bars.

As we were walking, she handed me another piece of bread to which I ate with much gusto.

"If you don't want to introduce yourself first then I'll be the one making the introductions," she said, as the servants then went ahead to escort us to the fancy-schmancy ride we were on. "My name's Rosalind." She smiled more.

What should I tell my name be? I never really had a name. My mother only called me 'my child' and I forgot what nickname my father christened me with. Gotta think fast!

"B-bard. Bardroy." I said the first thing that came to my head! Am I this dim-witted?!

She laughed and then extended her hand.

"Well then, a pleasure." She said, as we shook hands. "For meeting such a wonderful toymaker, sir… Bardroy." She tittered again.

And that's where it began. Y'know, it's pretty ironic. She was nice and sweet and all, but I never really wanted to experience love, much more cherish that feeling. When I met her, however, I had no other option but to. I was like in a platoon, pushed by the enemy with nowhere to run. Either I die, or I become captive. I wasn't stupid, so I chose the second. I'm still not sure if I'm happy with it or not[x2] .

July 13, 1889

I've finally reached it! What should I do? What should I say? It's a long time since, and I don't really have the guts to be here. I left her there for five years…

I could still recall it. Hazily, yeah (as you grow old your memories slip away) but it's still there.

I was finally accepted into 'er family. I was probably sixteen then, I don't really quite recall. We've been pretty close then. I've earned their trust. The business was going pretty well, thanks to me hehe. Our stocks were increasing, and our products were on demand.

Rose and I had been close. Nah, not as close as you'd imagine but we were more closer than friends. She'd let me in her room and we'd converse about almost anything, from the happenings in her father's business to politics, the books she lent me, to our personal lives.

"Say, Sir Bardroy," she'd giggle. "Have you taken a fancy to anyone?"

I scoff at such a question. "No, my lady. Why'd you say that?"

My lips were slightly quivering from the lie I just let out. And that's just one of them.

I never told her of my background. Sure, I was that illegal American immigrant that can make gizmos and all, but that was all she knew.

Until that night.

Now, nobles, as I found out had their marriages arranged. At sixteen (she's also my age by the way) she was going to marry the most important person on the land who was almost thrice her age!

And, like every lady, she desired someone more… er, dashing.

A night four months before her wedding, I invited her to the stables. It was her birthday that time.

"It's so dark!" she squealed when I led her by the hand inside.

"Wait a moment, fair lady." I said as I let go of her hand and slowly walked towards the middle (I should know of course!). "Voila!" I then lit a flame.

Shards of glass in different colors surrounded the lamp where the flame was lit. And with the gizmo I call a Spinna, the glass shards spinned, dazzling the light and the walls. From there, I let the small, mechanical nightingales out, as they sang the 'London Bridge' tune.

I then took her hand, gave her a bunch of roses under my coat.

"May I?"

She held out her hand and nodded.

When I pulled her close, I could smell her scent. It reminded me of spring, the smell of cherries and fresh air. Like the smell my nostrils had taken in when I had my freedom.

Our dance was slow, our steps careful, and our faces close, I could smell her breath. And that was the only thing I hated from that dance.

I know my moves weren't as graceful as yours, Rosaline but damn it, I didn't care. Because I finally realized it. What I craved for. And so did you.

"Bard I-" she said as her spin froze. "Please… don't let me go out there and marry that old man."

I let go of her hand. The birds stopped singing. I knew where she was going to.

"Are you touched in the head my lady? Your father said so. I'm but a mere worker."

She then held my hand as I was about to turn my back.

"I don't- I don't want to marry him. I don't love him."

I slapped it aside. I finally lost it.

"Stupid woman! Do you think that life is a fairytale where you'll marry the one you love?! Did that nutshell of yours conclude that 'love' matters and not your happiness?! Think you foolish bitch! That man can help you be happy! Who knows? With that riches and power of his, you might love him!"

"But I don't dammit!" She screamed, her eyes watering. "I don't care if he's the richest noble I met! I don't care if he's the most powerful earl in England! You know why Bard? You know why I don't love him? Because despite all of that, despite the blessings he receive, that hypocrite-that bastard doesn't earn it! And also… because-"

My mouth then was forcibly placed on hers. I could feel her tears dripping down as I felt her soft lips.

"There's already someone else in here Bard." She pointed at her chest, her voice meek. "And it's you."

I dearly savored that moment. I really wished that I could kiss her lips, and find out what it'll be like. Now, that's all I want it to be. A mere wish.

"You can never be happy with me, Rose. You can't and never will be."

I then left her there.

At that moment, even now, I regret that I invited her at the stables.

Yet, why was I happy that her feelings were the same as mine?