Grief

Word Count: 3,053
Rating: T
Warnings: None
Note: I'm not entirely pleased with this chapter to be honest, but I'm happy that it's done so that I can move on to the turning point of the story. There's still a lot of ground to cover before we reach the climax and this relationship building is necessary for it to make sense. That being said, I hope you enjoy!

The field is quiet, something made more blatant by the complete lack of birdsong in the air. Only the faint rustling of wheat keeps it from being overbearing, yet the young man pays it no mind. He looks young, is young by the standards of his kind, with soft gray hair and black eyes, and his youthful countenance is composed into what he hopes is an indifferent expression. He's come here with exciting news and he doesn't want his face to give his joy away before he's had a chance to share it. As the sun rises higher in the sky, he finds a shady spot by the forest's edge to wait, watching the sky with barely concealed anticipation. She'll be here soon. He knows that because she promised that she would come, and she's never broken a promise, though sometimes she arrives too late for more than the briefest of meetings. When the wind picks up and a shadow emerges from the clouds, he stands, bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet, feeling eager and nervous and content all at once. Having traced her trajectory as best as he could, he's already there when she lands, wings folding neatly against her back.

The girl he's been waiting for is roughly the same height he is, with soft black hair, pale skin, and eyes that are green once the amber of her Clan has faded. Six wings, a pale, pretty gray, rest along her spine, and the white dress she wears has a severely scooped back to allow them room to move. She grins at him, freckles standing out against the flush on her face, and reaches out to wrap her arms around his shoulders, a greeting that had developed as naturally as the rest of their unnatural relationship. Estarossa smiles back, unable to help it when she's so cheerful (sometimes she comes with bruises and eyes red from crying, and he hates how helpless it makes him feel to see her like that), returning the hug and catching the warm cinnamon scent of her hair. When they part, she links her arm with his to tug him into the shade of the trees. He follows, not because he has to, but because he wants to, and that's a sensation that still, after all these years, takes him by surprise. Once they're seated, her tucking her feet beneath her and him leaning against a tree, she clasps her hands together, eyes twinkling with mirth.

"Well? How did it go?"

Estarossa pretends to think about it, watching as concern slowly steals over her features. Then his lips twitch as he fights off a grin and says, "I start my training tomorrow with Chandler."

Lucifer laughs, throwing her arms around him and sending them toppling into the grass. "I knew you could do it!" Propping herself on her elbows so she can look down at him, she tilts her head. "You're stronger than you think, little prince."

"Don't call me that." Estarossa scowls at the nickname. "You know I hate it."

"Sorry, sorry." She rolls off him, spreading out on her back. "Do you think you'll be able to master Full Counter? That's what he taught your brother, isn't it?"

He shifts onto his side to study her, tracing the planes of her face with his gaze. "I dunno. At least I'll be learning now, even if the others think I'm useless."

"You aren't useless. The others are just stupid." One wing extends to knock his forehead lightly. Estarossa blinks; usually Lucifer isn't so outspoken about his treatment by the rest of his Clan.

"What would you call someone who can't kill a bug?"

"Kind." When Estarossa snorts, she shrugs. "I'm serious. It's harder to be kind than it is to be cruel."

"How would you know? You've always been strong." The words are harsher than he intends them to be, and he wants to take them back when her brow furrows, mouth pulling into a thin line.

Then she sighs, sitting up and flaring her wings as if to shield them from any prying eyes. "Maybe. But . . . I've seen a lot of cruelty. Not necessarily directed at me, just . . . It seems to come easier than kindness to some. That's why I want you to promise me that you'll always be kind. Will you?"

Estarossa mirrors her position, reaching out to lace their fingers together. It's a bold move that sets his hearts hammering in his chest and causes a blush to stain the tips of his ears, but he manages to swallow his anxiety to reply, "Only if you'll promise to always come see me when you can."

Lucifer smiles, bringing his hand up to curl her free one around it. "I promise, Rossa. I'm not going anywhere."

"What do you mean, she collapsed?" Arms crossed, Meliodas regards Jenna with irritation. "What did you do to her?"

Jenna returns his ire, tapping her foot. "Nothing. I just blessed her and told her that she passed her trial. Then she started screaming."

Merlin, studying Moth where she lays on a mat of woven grass, peers curiously at the Druid. "A blessing wouldn't have had this effect on its own. Was there something you did to accompany it?"

Jenna opens her mouth, then closes it. Her expression shifts to one of mild horror and concern when she says, "I kissed her forehead, like she used to do back then. I didn't even think about her having this kind of reaction."

"Ah. I see." Holding one hand out over Moth's forehead, Merlin sends a gentle wave of magic through the witch, searching for her consciousness. She finds it buried deep within a black sea. When she tries to reach for it, something shoves against her hard enough to cause her projected body to flicker and Aldan to drop precariously close to the ground.

"Merlin?" Meliodas takes a step forward, halting only when the orb returns to its original height and the sorceress reappears.

"I'm quite alright, Captain. However . . ." Gesturing to Moth, Merlin shakes her head. "I cannot say the same for her. Whatever happened when she collapsed, it caused the soul to build a barrier around itself as if resisting an attack."

Meliodas closes his eyes, shielding his worry from Merlin's knowing gaze. Unbidden, the memory of a young girl with haunted eyes following him around an inn rises, and he has to fight against the concern to keep his voice steady. "Do you know when she'll wake up?"

"No. But she's tenacious. I doubt it will be long." Merlin glances at Jenna, and her voice is surprisingly understanding when she adds, "This isn't your fault. With the trauma she endured, we have no way of knowing what will cause a reaction. Blaming yourself will get us nowhere."

Jenna nods. "Thank you. Now, Meliodas, if you'll follow me, we'll get your power back."

Meliodas responds affirmatively, yet lingers by the entrance of the cave. After a brief internal debate, he turns on his heel and makes his way over to the witch, leaning down to press his forehead against hers. "Don't stay away too long," he murmurs, then straightens and follows Jenna towards the clearing. There, he finds the others clustered curiously around Jenna, though King is scowling and regards him with suspicion when he takes his place. He ignores it for now, instead watching as the Goddess turned Druid recites the incantation to summon the Goddess Amber that contains the vast majority of his strength. It's large, and darkness swirls lazily within its depths, occasionally pressing against the edges as if testing for any flaw that would allow its freedom. Jenna tells everyone to move back, then turns her attention to Meliodas once more.

With a simple spell, the Goddess Amber splits and darkness envelops Istar. Meliodas watches it, thinking that it comes with good and bad memories and emotions attached, and then Jenna speaks and it converges on him, swallowing him whole. There is no pain as it filters through his system, only a sense of a hunger he didn't know he had being sated. His fatigue vanishes, as does the lingering feeling of being a half-empty being, though there is a second of time where it almost overwhelms him and he fears that he will return to what he used to be. When it passes, Meliodas clenches his fist, feeling the magic flicker around his knuckles, and then he takes in the worried expressions of his comrades and feels something mischievous bubble in his soul.

He chuckles. "I've dreamed of this day for so long. My strength has finally returned to me . . . !" When they take a step back, disbelief on their faces, he drops the façade. "Just kidding."

Meliodas ignores King ire as he dresses, instead choosing to address Merlin. "Can you teleport me to where the Ten Commandments are?"

Gilthunder draws in a startled breath. "Have you lost your mind?! Charging straight to the enemy?! You're suicidal!"

"It's possible." Speaking over Gilthunder's outburst, Merlin replies, "I know for certain where I need to teleport you to put you close to Galand. However, it will take ten seconds before I can teleport you back here once you've been sent there, and I have a hard time believing they will just twiddle their thumbs and do nothing during that time. In other words, you must hold them at bay for ten seconds by yourself, or you will return to us as a corpse. Do you still want to proceed with this?"

"Yep. Let's do it." He fastens his sword against his back.

"Alright." Magic gathers and swirls around Merlin as she prepares to send him to Edinburgh.

Hendrickson steps forward, eyes alight with worry. "Sir Meliodas, it's just like Gil said! The Ten Commandments are too powerful!"

"It's just going to be a greeting." Meliodas smiles, but there's something dark behind it. "Besides, I need to know if he's there or not."

He feels the magic stir hundreds of miles away. It's achingly familiar, belonging to the one he'd once admired and strived to imitate, but it isn't until Meliodas is standing there, nonchalant in his manner and eyes green instead of black that Estarossa truly feels the rage begin to simmer beneath his skin. He watches as Galand engages him, as Meliodas comes within inches of ending the Commandment's life, yet he only sits up when a different energy curls around Meliodas. It's the same magic that had made flowers bloom at his feet, that had brought legions to their knees, that had been so devastating to others while blanketing him in warmth. His gaze locks with his brother's, his equal love and animosity returned by Meliodas, and his anger comes dangerously close to the surface when Meliodas addresses him.

"I won't let you have her again."

His wrath boils over just as Meliodas disappears, but the only outward sign of it is the way his fists clench and his eyes harden. Estarossa pays no mind to the bickering of the others, fighting to keep his fury from becoming hatred. Three thousand years of bitter loneliness and betrayal are fuel to the fire, and for Meliodas, the one who had taken everything from him, to not only find Lucifer but to threaten to keep her from him causes darkness to crackle at his fingertips. It's only when he feels himself start to weaken that he shakes himself from his thoughts, forcing his rage to a simmer before it robs him of the strength he'll need to tear Meliodas apart. The sudden silence alerts him to the absence of the others. When Zeldris glances his way, there's a caution in his gaze that fills Estarossa with a strange sort of pride.

He expects to be questioned about Meliodas's declaration, but instead Zeldris asks, "You're not leaving, brother?"

"It's the first time we've been outside in three thousand years." Estarossa closes his eyes. "Let me enjoy the fresh air around here for a bit."

"Perfect. I have something I need to do near here as well." Zeldris makes to leave, then pauses, addressing Estarossa over his shoulder. "I don't need to remind you what will happen if you hate him."

"No," Estarossa agrees.

Zeldris nods and takes off, perhaps to see if the Vampire Clan's seal has held in the years since the Demon Clan's disappearance. Estarossa is considering attempting to find Lucifer in his dreams again when a bird lands on his arm, chirping curiously. Its appearance startles him more than he'd care to admit. How many times had he waited impatiently for Lucifer to coax a bird down from the trees so that he could see it and learn its name? How many of those days were filled with quiet conversation and birds singing in the distance? When the bird taps its beak against his gauntlet, his eyes narrow; a surge of darkness warps it into something grotesque, a monster crying in agony as its bones rip and twist under the influence of his magic. As it writhes above him, a soft voice says, Promise me that you'll always be kind. When the bird bursts from the pressure of its blood, he thinks, I can't keep that promise any longer.

When Meliodas returns, he's pleased to see Moth up and about, and that pleasure increases when he sees how much healthier she looks now. A quick survey of his surroundings reveals a second Goddess Amber, shattered and empty some feet away, and the residue clinging to it lets him know that it once contained Moth's power. As he closes the distance between himself and the others, he finds himself wondering what he should tell her about his visit to the Ten Commandments. He knows that she should be privy to everything if she's going to fight, but there's a part of him that selfishly wants to keep her as ignorant, and therefore as happy, as he can for as long as possible. Hendrickson and Gilthunder greeting him is a welcome distraction from his inner turmoil, but it's only when he sees the soft way she smiles at him in relief that he decides not to tell her about Estarossa and the warning he'd left.

"Sir Meliodas! You're unharmed!"

He grins. "I told you that I just wanted to give them a little greeting."

"Does this greeting have anything to do with the blood on your shirt?" Moth sounds more amused than upset as she points at the rather large splatter on his arm.

"Mhm." Cheerfully, he explains, "I warned them that we'll crush them if they step out of line."

King is furious when he says, "What were you thinking?! You're out of line here! All you did was provoke them!"

"Yeah. More or less." Meliodas scratches the back of his head. He expected this from King, given how little the fairy trusts him, but what surprises him is when Jenna agrees with King.

"This is like waking up a sleeping baby! They were doing nothing clustered in one place! What are you going to do if they start invading?! You moron!" Her yelling prompts Moth to take a few steps away, rubbing her ear to soothe the ringing.

Still trying to ease the ache, Moth mutters, "Why are you so mad?"

King and Jenna round on her. "Why wouldn't we be?!"

"Britannia now has many countries and cities," Meliodas says, interrupting whatever scolding Jenna was about to deliver. "In order to conquer it, it'll be more efficient to split up and spread out . . . Is what they'll definitely think. If the entire Ten Commandments stay together in one place, even I can't beat them, despite being stronger now. That's why we'll make them split up and take them down one or two members at a time!"

A voice behind him chimes in. "Oh? That sounds interesting. My nose is ready to go!"

"Oh? You're done with your training, Haw . . ." Meliodas's voice trails off when he truly realizes what he's seeing. It's Hawk, yes, but now he's covered in red scales and has horns protruding from his head. Unwilling to address it, he immediately turns to Moth. "I'm glad to see you up. You feeling okay?"

"Mhm."

Ignoring Hawk's indignant squeals, he then shifts his attention to Zaneri. "If you're here, that means Elizabeth is done with her training too, right, Zaneri?"

"Yeah." Her gaze flickers between him and Hawk, uncertain.

"Oh!" Meliodas glances at Jenna as she makes her way over to him while the others move to greet the ones coming from the caves. Her voice is carefully neutral when she speaks. "You said you wanted to see if he was there, didn't you? Was he?"

He checks to make sure Moth is far enough away not to overhear him (it makes his lips twitch when he sees her petting the creature on top of Arthur's head) before replying, "He was."

"And?"

"I told him the truth. He won't hurt her again."

"Good." Jenna crosses her arms, watching Moth try and fail to tug the creature off of Arthur. "She's suffered enough."

Moth stumbles when she loses her grip on a particularly rough pull, laughing when Hendrickson steadies her. Watching her fills Meliodas with a fierce protectiveness that takes him by surprise. Despite her appearance and his knowledge of who she once was, it's slowly become harder for him to view her as anyone other than the girl that he took in and raised, the girl who used to curl up next to him when her dreams were particularly horrible, the girl who laughed when they startled a dragon and had to run, the girl who he's come to view as family. Seeing her like this, carefree and at ease, makes him hate Estarossa more than he thought he ever would. Had she been like this when Estarossa wove his lies around her, drawing her close enough to kill? Had she been laughing when she saw him that final time, and had that mirth faded to disbelief when he drove his sword through her chest?

Meliodas watches her, affection and rage warming his hearts. Never again. I won't let it happen ever again.