Disclaimer: I do not own anything mentioned or implied in this story...or any story really.
The Death Eaters and Voldemort stared at the strange sight before them.
It wasn't the fact that it was a lone figure, or that they carried a somewhat cheaply made nick-nak of a sword.
Not even the somewhat overly bleached half robe and pants with the black and gold belt was that strange.
No.
What had them starring at the person was that they were doing some kind of...dance? That involved a bunch of twisting, jumping, thrusting, and/or wide leg swiping. Each movement punctuated with yells and shouts that wouldn't even intimidate a baby let alone the darkest of darklords.
This kept on for at least ten minutes before the person stopped to...stare? No, something like...constipation? Maybe a fiber potion would aid that person. Suddenly to the surprise of everyone it spoke.
"Greetings Honor less one! I am here to banish you! I have been training for the last month waiting for this moment! For I am the Honorable, most talented, trained by the awesomeness that is Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan! You have killed my Mother and Fathter! Prepare to be vanquished for I am Har-Lee Potter-Chan!"
Suddenly the figure dropped dead after a somewhat dim flash of green light. Honestly, how do you cast a killing curse on such a creature without hatred? Even all of the hatred Voldemort had he couldn't muster much in such conditions, mass confusion for sure...perhaps it was pity? Self hatred for seeing such a sight?
"Lucius..."
"Yes...My Lord?"
"Lets never speak of this. Ever."
"Speak of what my Lord..."
"Yes...now...what was I saying...Ah yes..." Voldemort turned towards all of his followers who were still dumbstruck at what just happened. "My Followers...Prepare yourselves! We leave at Dawn...I want to get out of here before any more crazy people show up! Lets head for Australia...or Canada..."
All of the death eaters cheered tossing their masks and robes in haste to pack. Only voldemort remained behind as he muttered to himself. "Maybe I'll grow my hair back...and my nose...what had come over me I have no idea. Honestly ever since entering the wizarding world I've been surrounded by weirdos..."
OooOooO
And so Harry Potter was found later on by Snape who was late showing up. Taking the body to Dumbledore, who went into cardiac arrest due to bad health and shock. The Wizarding world had gone into a panic, both of their heroes had died in the span of 24 hours, they had tried to surrender to the Dark Lord...only to not find him. Only a note telling them to leave him the hell alone.