Chapter Seven: We Met (Offically) Over an Onion Cell
Weather is normal right? Well normal conversation between humans, that is. I rarely made contact with them myself, so I couldn't exactly be sure. Seemed safe enough, not frightening. Like soft falling snow could ever seem harmless.
"It's too bad about the snow, isn't it?" I asked. Easy friendly topic. But looking at her face I saw confusion, like she didn't understand my question. It was so frustrating, not being able to read her mind. Hypothetically, if this was anyone else, and they looked at me like she had, I could have read their mind and understood what they were thinking. Not with Bella. But then again, she wasn't exactly like everyone else. It was like she had walls built around her mind, allowing no one to pass without her permission. It didn't seem like she gave many people that permission.
"Not really," she whispered all of the sudden, still slightly avoiding my gaze.
"You don't like the cold." I stated, mainly to myself, but made it as a confirmation.
"Or the wet," she added.
That struck me as odd. Forks always rained, or snowed if the temperature was cold enough. Only on very rare days was it ever sunny. So why would she move here? "Forks must be a difficult place for you to live."
"You have no idea," she muttered. Her walls that seemed I was beginning to break down, shot right back up again.
I couldn't understand what she was feeling or thinking. And as rude as it may seem, I had to pry some more. "Why did you come here then?" I tried asking with a light tone.
Her eyebrows scrunched together as she looked down at the table. "It's…complicated."
"I think I can keep up."
She gave a small sigh and began, "My mother got remarried."
"That doesn't sound so complex," but now it sounded like I thought she was incompetent, so I sympathetically added, "when did this happen?"
This time a big sigh before she started again, "Last September."
I wasn't exactly following where this was going but I tried to continue understanding. "And you don't like him."
"No, Phil is fine. Too young, maybe, but nice enough." Then what was the problem?
"Why didn't you stay with them?" I pressed, staring her in the eyes, hoping she would see compassion and not anger, like the last time.
"Phil travels a lot. He plays ball for a living." And at that, I saw her give a slight smile. And I did too. My kind likes playing ball too; wait till she saw.
"Have I heard of him?" I rarely watched baseball, but I asked anyway.
"Probably not. He doesn't play well. Strictly minor league. He moves around a lot."
Finally I got it, "And your mother sent you here so she could travel with him."
"No, she did not send me here. I sent myself." Self-sacrifice?
"I don't understand." I swear, if I could have just read her mind, this wouldn't be so difficult. But maybe this was half the battle.
She sighed, seeming just as frustrated as I was. Was she frustrated at me? This thought made me go crazy, as if it wasn't bad enough with her scent practically drowning me. She couldn't tell, and I could barely fathom it myself, but she was alluring me, dragging me in, to a point where I wasn't sure if I could handle her anymore, and I would just have to give in to my senses.
But I kept controlled, despite how difficult it was.
"She stayed with me at first, but she missed him. It made her unhappy…so I decided it was time to spend some quality time with Charlie," she continued.
She seemed so upset by this fact; it, and she, perplexed me. "But now you're unhappy." It was so strange, but seeing her like this made me go crazy. And I didn't know which way, her vulnerability and my vampire side, or her sadness and my deeply-buried human side.
"And?" she asked, staring me right in the eye. Well, before she got embarrassed, blushed, and turned her head away.
"That doesn't seem fair," I stated. And I could have sworn I saw her peeking at me out o the corner of her eye.
But she turned back to me, with a tiny laugh, "Hasn't anyone told you? Life isn't fair."
She was right. I felt as if I was dealt the bad hand, and not even in this situation. The influenza, transformation, blood-lust, my powers. And now, her overpowering scent, mixed with my own desire. Didn't seem fair to me that I should be tested like this. Whether it was fate, or God, or whatever. "I believe I have heard that somewhere before."
"So that's all," she finished.
And she simply amazed me, for a human. Giving up her life in Phoenix, for her mother's happiness. Humans were selfish, and she wasn't. She was caring, and sweet (her scent and character), and smart…and tempting, but in what aspect, I wouldn't be sure again. "You put on a good show," I told her. For someone who's built walls around their mind, I finished in my head. "But I'd be willing to bet that you're suffering more than you let anyone see."
Her reaction was a scowl at me.
"Am I wrong?" I asked. But I knew I wasn't.
She continued to not answer, so I chuckled under my breath, whispering, "I didn't think so."
Somehow, she heard me. "Why does it matter to you?"
Her tone surprised me. Angry, at me. But her question held a few of my own. Why was I interested in her, and her story? Why did she drive me insane, like no other? "That's a very good question," I murmured.
She sighed and turned to watch the teacher check the other tables, seeming slightly irritated.
It drove me insane. Not knowing what her thoughts on me were. She looked upset with me, but how could I know? Usually, I was so good at detecting human emotions, and when it was hard to decipher, I just read their minds. But with Bella, she gave me the unexpected.
I had to know, "Am I annoying you?"
She turned back to me, but hesitated before answering me, "Not exactly. I'm more annoyed at myself. My face is so easy to read—my mother always calls me her open book."
She astounded me, "On the contrary, I find you rather difficult to read."
"You must be a good reader then," she mused.
"Usually," I replied, giving her a bigger smile than before. She had no idea.