-1"I want to see Jeff," he says to me expectantly, as if I'm going to snap my fingers and conjure his brother from thin air. I wish I could do that, because then I could also use my magic powers to make Jeff clean, and I know that right now, he isn't.

I shake my head and move to Matt, wrapping my arms around his waist. He looks at me questioningly for a moment, before he realizes what I'm doing. My hands emerge from beneath his coat holding what I'm guessing is a 9mm. I walk over to set it down on the coffee table.

"Let him rest by himself. He's at my place and he's safe. I'll stay here tonight and we'll go see him tomorrow."

"Fine," he says, stripping off his coat, followed by his shirt. They're both tossed carelessly on the couch and I follow him then into his bedroom.

I'm not accustomed to sleeping over at Matt's place, because Amy was usually here. I pause and wait to see what side of the bed he takes, and then situate myself beside him. After kicking off his boots, he lounges back against the headboard wearing nothing but his black jeans, and lights up a cigarette.

He smokes in silence for a moment before I decide to ask my question.

"Matt? Were you honestly gonna shoot him?"

He's quiet for another minute and I think perhaps he's just going to pretend I didn't say anything at all. Finally, he looks over at me, and I feel him shrug.

"I'm not sure. I wanted to."

"Why didn't you?"

"'Cause you were right. I can't take care of Jeff from behind bars."

"So does that mean you're actually gonna start takin' care of Jeff?"

"I'm gonna try. If he lets me."

"He will," I reply, and am surprised at the sudden pang of sadness in my chest.

The room is mostly dark, lit only by the neon lights outside reflecting into the single window, and the cherry of Matt's cigarette. All I can see of him is his silhouette in the shadows.

He reaches over to his nightstand and snubs out his cigarette in the ashtray there, and then rolls onto his side toward me. He places his hand on my stomach and scoots close enough that I can feel his body heat lashing against me. With a knot of excitement tight in my belly, I turn my face toward him and his lips are about an inch from mine.

"Thank you," he whispers. "For caring so much about my brother."

"I care about you, too, y'know." I silently curse myself as soon as the words have left my mouth. They have enough drama of their own without having to deal with mine. That, and I don't really want to admit my feelings for them to anyone. Including myself.

He doesn't voice a reply, and I can't see his face well enough to determine his reaction. His kiss is a surprise, but familiar enough for me to return it without hesitation.

They're so different in their feel and technique, and for the first time, I actually take time to marvel in it. Our tongues are flickering against one another, and I can taste nicotine and Matt's own unique flavor.

When he shifts his weight to move atop me, I realize that it is no longer my place to be in this position. If anyone belongs in Matt's bed, beneath the seductive weight of his body, it's Jeff. But somehow, with Matt kissing me and dipping his hands beneath my clothing, I can't bring myself to tell him to stop.

He sits up and moves to sit on the edge of my bed, divesting himself of what little clothing he had left. I lay there and try to catch my breath, but he seems to think that is a waste of time, indeed. As soon as he's naked, he goes to work on me, removing my clothes in such a hurry that it makes me chuckle.

When he stretches out over me again, his bare skin against mine causes what almost feels like an electrical current running through us both. His erection slides languidly against mine, making us both shudder and groan into each others mouths. I can't chase the picture of Jeff out of my head, and the thought that this is not how it's supposed to be. But I reason with myself that this will be the last time, and it's just an intimate way of saying goodbye.

Matt, in this moment, seems as though he's able to read my thoughts. Whereas our sex before had usually been fast paced and intense, this time he's drawing out every movement as if he, too, knows this will be the last time and wants to thoroughly enjoy it, as well.

I'm surprised when he pushes himself up onto his knees, straddling my hips. It isn't exactly rare that we have sex face to face, but he does tend to prefer it on his hands and knees with me behind him. I wasn't lying when I told Jeff that I thought Matt wanted to pretend I was him. It never bothered me. Much.

He's leaning over me and fumbling around through the drawer in the nightstand, searching for lube. I can't exactly see, but I guess that he's found it when he sits back up straight again. I expect him to hand it over, and a flush of heat rages through me when I hear him gasp raggedly and realize that he's preparing himself.

I decide that this is way too good to be missed, and so I blindly throw my hand out toward the nightstand, searching for the switch on the lamp. Finally, I find it and flip it on, and it fills the room with soft yellow light.

Matt is straddling me with his back arched and his head rolling backward on his shoulders. He's got one hand behind him, working fingers into himself, while the other is slowly stroking over his dripping cock. The sight is amazing, and all I can do is watch him open-mouthed, counting myself lucky that I'm here to witness such a thing.

After several moments, he looks down at me and grabs the lube back up from where he'd tossed it. Rubbing a dollop into his hand, he reaches down and wraps strong fingers around me, pumping over my hard on and slicking me up. When he's satisfied, he moves up and positions his hips above me, holding the base of my cock as he starts lowering himself.

We both moan when my head insinuates past the initial tight ring of muscle, and he continues working himself down until I'm completely enveloped within his heat. He's panting, and holding still for a moment to allow himself to get used to the sensation. I reach up and grab the rubber band that holding his hair at bay, letting his dark curls fall about his shoulders and frame his face. When he gets his wits back, he returns the favor and lets my hair loose to fan across the pillow that I'm lying against.

When he starts to move, I slide my hands down his chest and stomach and let them come to rest on his hips, guiding the rhythm of his body and arching up off the bed to meet him. The room is filled with groans and the wet smack of skin against skin, and I lament for a moment how I'll miss this before being distracted by the pleasure once more.

I can't drag my eyes away from him as he rides me. His hands are on my chest, fingers kneading my skin probably hard enough to leave bruises. He's got his head tossed back and his eyes closed, his hair and forehead damp with sweat. I can see the muscles in this thighs rippling beneath his skin as he works his legs and shifts his hips against me.

Matt is such a thick skinned person in day to day life. All he shows to people is his rough exterior and his willingness and ability to take on anyone who dares challenge him. But in this moment, as he reaches up to almost frantically start stroking himself to climax, I delight in seeing him let go.

He starts whispering words under his breath, punctuated by his moans, and they're enough to make me grab his hips tighter and start pounding upward into him.

"Yeah, c'mon, Chris. Fuck me.. yeah, just like that. Mmm.. close."

After another few moments, he tenses and shudders and his release splatters hot and sticky against my chest and stomach. The feeling of him tightening around me and the visual image of him losing control is enough to finish me off. The orgasm is mindblowing, to say the least, and after I've emptied myself inside him, my body is tingling and all I can see are shadows in front of my eyes.

I'm vaguely aware of him rolling off of me and back to his side of the bed. When he's done cleaning up, he tosses the towel to me and I lazily wipe myself clean. Afterward, he resumes the position he'd been in before all this started: leaning propped up against the headboard with a cigarette in his mouth. I accept when he offers me one, and he lights it for me, and we smoke in silence for quite a while.

When the cigarettes are gone, we settle ourselves beneath the sheets. We don't touch; there's nothing between us now that would insinuate we're anything except close friends. Somehow, that's okay. We had our moment.

I'm up, showered, and dressed before Matt is even anything resembling awake. I'm in the bathroom, leaning over the counter and staring at myself in the mirror when he finally walks in. I turn from examining my battered reflection, meeting his eyes. He's still naked and tossed from bed, with a air of satisfaction around him. It's nice to know I'm the one that put it there.

He moves past me and starts the shower up again, letting it run for a minute to get hot. I want to ask something from him, but I don't want to ruin the place we're at right now. It's a good place to be.

Finally, he turns and looks at me over his shoulder. "What is it, Chris? Why ya starin' at me?"

I sigh and lean against the bathroom counter. "I have a favor to ask of you. I know I have no right.. but I think it would really help me out a lot."

This seems to catch his full attention and he stands up straight again, swiveling his body to face me completely. "Yeah? An' what's that?"

"Let me go alone to talk to Jeff, first. There's just a few things I want to say to him before you guys start workin' shit out. I'll send him back to his apartment as soon as we're done, and you can meet him there.. okay?"

He seems to consider this for a moment, eyes darting back and forth in thought, before he finally looks at me again and nods in agreement. He's being more understanding than I ever thought possible, and I can't express to him in words how grateful it makes me.

I slide my hand into my pocket and extract my key ring, slowly working Jeff's front door key from the collection. I set it down on the bathroom counter with a soft clink, and look up at Matt. "In case you get there before he does. I won't need it anymore, anyway."

A look passes between us, and I'm not entirely sure what it means. I'm trying hard to keep the disappointment and resentment out of my face, and Matt looks like he's trying hard to decipher just what it is that I'm thinking.

When I turn to leave, he doesn't make any move to try and stop me.