Unfortunately, Hinata Hyuuga had steel for balls. When people throw poop parties, he'd gladly dodge, but this one time, Hinata Hyuuga shoved an elephant bum fresh cream on his face and he couldn't do a thing.
So it's official. After hearing her sugar daddy's name pass her lips, which is the cherry on top to the elephant tush fresh cream permanently stuck on his face, he'd gone warming a seat once again at Hiruzen's office while Hinata Hyuuga talked about fairy tales to an old man with a rich, purely academic references up his shelves.
On one side of the wall were rows of hard bound theses, and books related to education and psychology: No One Cared, Still No One Cares and Nobody Cares About Your Feelings; Move On. The opposite wall showcased volumes of Her Problems Bigger than Yours? Suck It Up and No Point In Looking Back.
—him?
No, he wasn't looking back two chapters ago. That was purely for the reader's sake and not because he still has—RIDICULOUS; They were children which meant he was dumb once and therefore had dumb feelings.
"They say things happen for a reason," said Doctor Hiruzen, stroking his jaw. "I believe that must be the case why the school's guardian showed itself to you. My grandfather said only his grandfather had seen the fairy and had the opportunity of helping it out, in this place, where the school stands to this day. But I remember an action song he taught me when I was a boy. He said his grandfather taught it to him to call out to the fairy." Going to the front, the school head slapped his thighs like willing a horse. "Come on you two. I don't have all day."
As Hinata Hyuuga took a spot behind Hiruzen, the old man chanted dattebayo, dattebayo as he swished his arms and bottom. Hinata Hyuuga tagged along the monkey act, doing a ballet turn as Hiruzen did. Obviously, the whole thing was bogus, and Sasuke began feeling more depressed, not for himself but for getting someone's hopes up.
"Sasuke Uchiha." Hinata shot an icy glare. "We talked, didn't we?"
Sasuke sighed. "Don't worry. I remember stuff easily."
"I see. So that's why you cheated on an exam."
Sasuke groaned in frustration.
"Fugaku's boy, you must be thinking this doesn't work, but I tell you my grandfather has never told a lie in his life and he believed every word his grandfather told him. Honesty is a Tobirama trait," said Hiruzen.
"No liar admits they are one, Doctor Hiruzen," Sasuke answered.
"Doctor, I think he just needs a hug," said Hinata. "Our situation is a bit of a downer. We get by, but your comfort will definitely lift his spirits up."
Wild glint shone in her eyes as the troll-haired old man pulled Sasuke out his seat to squeeze a bear hug. Sasuke tried to break free but couldn't and Hiruzen hugged him tighter, smelling of black coffee and old man aftershave.
"People will start to wonder you're always together," Hiruzen said. "Hina-chan, have you thought about making Uchiha boy here your boyfriend?"
Not necessary, doctor, not necessary.
"Never," Hinata answered simply, taking pictures with her phone. "Not by my life or every precious meter between us."
"It can't be helped." Hiruzen patted Sasuke's head, much to his displeasure. "If someone ever asks, tell them Uchiha is being punished and is put by me under your surveillance."
"No way," grunted Sasuke, struggling to get his way out. "That's like being on a tight leash of a dog walker with charges filed by PETA. And Human Rights."
The old man landed a wet, noisy kiss on his cheek. "Right now, you're stuck together. But on the other side of the coin," he whispered, "You're the only one who can truly help Hina-chan."
It was then that Sasuke saw a row of Doraemon manga stashed under his coffee table.
"Why do you have Doraemon?" Sasuke asked, rubbing his cheek. It's either this man knows his stuff or, "Are you a pedophile, old man?"
Hiruzen gave a hearty chuckle and loosened his killer hug. "Just like Doraemon it's my dream to provide doors."
"Provide doors… like Doraemon…" He has never heard anyone say it that way.
Immediately, Sasuke grew in respect for Hiruzen and inwardly acknowledged his terrible misjudgement.
"It's all about the angle, isn't it?" Hinata held her screen up, showing what looked like the climax to a French film of great taboo proportions. "Insurance. I don't believe you have copies, but I can't be sure."
"Oh. I remember something," said Hiruzen, stopping midway drinking his coffee behind his desk. "Ramen... My grandfather said his grandfather paired the chant and the dance with an offering of ramen."
"What kind of ramen?" asked Hinata.
"As long as it's delicious, it should be alright." Hiruzen grinned, his eyes squeezed to crescents.
Sasuke called his cousin Shisui in Kyoto afterwards.
"…Un. Anything. As long as it's the most expensive one…. Yeah. That'll do. Make sure it arrives by six."
He ended the call.
"I don't think that's necessary," said Hinata. "There are cheap but delicious ramen around. Quite filling, too. Going for the most expensive one is a bit..."
"The more expensive the offering, the more Naruto will be obligated to comply with our request," he said.
Hinata folded her arms. "You remind me of my grandmother, it's creepy."
He smirked. "Learned from Wharton's best."
Hinata Hyuuga's brows knitted wondering who he meant and he didn't bother answer. The last thing he wanted to hear would be that person's name from her lips. He will help her get what she wants and make sure she gets it. After that, he won't mind her anymore.
This will be the chapter where it ends.
Quarter to six and the number of students present decreased. Hinata kept saying they can't stay late since she has part-time, and Sasuke understood she hadn't thought it was their dignity at stake here. Shisui called him to pick up the ramen at the main gate.
"I'm accustomed to your strange requests, but seeing a girl here… Going for the ramen tactic, are you?" Shisui wiggled a brow.
Sasuke received the ramen crate handed out. "Yes, in fact, I actually am."
Shisui winked at Hinata and patted Sasuke's shoulder. "Best of luck." He slinked inside his Mercedes and zoomed away.
Sasuke surveyed the students going out the gate, and which floors had most activity. He thought about the locations of the clubrooms and which classrooms have the old library on periphery. While a margin of error exists, his estimates run 30 percent chances of getting seen. Quite high but fairly tolerable. As Hinata Hyuuga said, it's all about angles. He squared his shoulders and marched out to Naruto's statue by the old library, walking around it.
Hinata looked at him weirdly as he took out the porcelain bowl and placed it behind the statue's foot. "What are you doing? The statue's facing here."
"Old man Hiruzen never said it has to be there."
"That looks… improper," said Hinata. "It's like we're offering to his butt."
Sasuke stretched his neck side to side. "Let's get to it."
"You didn't even follow Doctor Hiruzen's demo."
Listening to Hinata's footsteps going behind him, to the air, to the leaves, Sasuke entered the zone.
"Dattebayo, dattebayo…" he began to chant, getting into the first position his feet spread apart, arms wiggling in the air, his warrior soul expressed with every move, "Dattebayo, dattebayo…" pouring out his heart and soul into his dance, that when he went for the twirl, Hinata looked at him awestruck. She must be. By the fourth round, he was panting and Naruto was yet to come out.
"Naruto," Hinata gently called. "Naruto."
Halfway through their chants, sparkles whirled in the air. Naruto appeared with a face mask on and a pillow tucked under his arm, sporting striped pajamas and a nightcap.
"Whoa!" The midget fairy's eyes bulged. "That smells really good!"
Sasuke bent one knee. "Do partake venerable, queer, mutant fairy." That probably came out wrong.
"You're trying too hard," chided Hinata.
"Ah, what a dilemma," said Naruto, drooling. "Just as I was preparing to hibernate. Ah, I would love to, but I might have nightmares hibernating on a full stomach."
"Animals hibernate with a full stomach," quipped Sasuke.
"How rude." Naruto slumped on his wings. "I'm not like animals. What were you guys doing?"
"Summoning you," said Hinata.
Naruto tilted his head. "Eh? What's up with that? You could've just brought ramen, called for me, and I would've come—if I weren't hibernating."
Sasuke gritted his teeth. He knew that old geezer was a fraud!
The fairy sniffed the bowl. "Ah, this broth, this spice… I don't know what's what but it makes me wanna sniff it more."
"That's two million yen," answered Sasuke and Hinata broke in a fit of coughs.
Naruto pulled away looking disgusted. "I've been around longer than you to know how human deal with their affairs. You must want something to think price could ever sway me."
"If not for the price then the premium black truffles,"
Naruto gulped. "Premium black truffles—"
"Yeah, and hopshoots with beluga caviar, topped with rich, fragrant saffron, twenty four karat gold leaf, and top quality Wagyu beef."
The fairy wiped his flood of drool. "Beef, mmm, I like eating cooked cows. Everything else, I don't know what's what, but they sounded so delish!" His tiny wings flapped gleefully, eyes shining at the ramen.
"Now I expect you to be honourable, mighty fairy," continued Sasuke. "In exchange for what we're offering, I kindly ask you to remove the curse."
"Eh?" Naruto said smugly. "You can only demand such a thing if you've truly made up."
Sasuke reached an arm over Hinata's shoulders mechanically. She shifted left slightly, murmured it's hot but stayed still.
No, her shoulder isn't small. He couldn't smell her shampoo which he also used. No warmth came from her hand on his back. Like a centipede, her fingers barely touched him.
And no, this wasn't how he once imagined they'd pose for their wedding photo with Doraemon's take-copter on their heads, then they'd fly to the moon for their honeymoon.
Lastly, no, he didn't once think that honeymoons only happen on the moon.
"We're comfortable with each other now," he said and Hinata nodded.
This was, truly… the last goodbye I never get to say.
Naruto narrowed his eyes and said, "Eeeeh. That looks painful," like he could see through him, or something.
Sasuke's jaws tightened. "No, I'm… This, my hand—I'm not hurting her, am I right, Hyuuga?"
Hinata blinked. "Yes… It doesn't hurt in particular. I'm sorry, what are we talking about?"
Naruto paced. "Okay. I acknowledge your best efforts, boy. I admit the curse I've given was quite severe. But you should know that only curses can undo themselves." A holographic screen appeared before Naruto which he could manipulate with hand signs. "Curse protocol address 545*331-11N4T4… There's only one valid log so far. From Sasuke Uchiha."
"Only one? What time?" asked Sasuke.
Hinata gawked. "Is this for real?"
"6:15 AM." Naruto peered over his computer.
"Must be the miso. It was good… That or only one thanks per day counts. Which is it?"
"As long as it's heartfelt, the system will acknowledge it," Naruto explained.
"Doesn't matter anymore." Sasuke waved. "Undo it now."
"There's no bypassing the overarching main curse protocol, but I can revise some elements," answered Naruto, typing fast. "You now only need to say a thank you for the thing you're grateful for each other the most… We're not fooling ourselves here. The main curse protocol is not acknowledging this,"—his bitsy hands gestured wildly at them—"being 'comfortable' or whatever you call it… You go first, Hinata Hyuuga."
Sasuke looked at Hinata.
"Thank you for making things work," she said, her gaze steadfast and determined.
"Oooo-to! Quite high but not there yet," said Naruto, looking at a see-through bar partly full. "Judging from other statistics, you're still tentative, but that's acceptable. Now you go, Sasuke Uchiha."
His childhood with Hinata Hyuuga flashed before his eyes. What was he thankful about at that time…
Memories flooded and he couldn't tell one apart from the other…
If it weren't for that day… If it weren't for that day in fourth grade…
A lot.
He's thankful for a lot of things. So many he couldn't count.
Maybe that's why it hurt.
Maybe that's why he'll go on scarred for life.
"Thank you for…"
Because there were a lot.
"—feeding me this morning."
Beep!—went a loud buzzer. "Are you kidding me?!" Naruto threw his hands in the air. "You just had to fail, didn't you?! Now the MCP won't accept that revised configuration a second time. Your current status persists."
"Wait, what are you talking about? That was heartfelt!" argued Sasuke.
"Error 134*4. Redundancy!" Naruto puffed his cheeks in anger.
"This is all your fault, you crazy midget! You never bothered to explain us anything! There are so many things illogical with your curse! And what about the ramen, huh?!" shouted Sasuke. "Two million yen, you idiot!"
Naruto scrunched his face, twirling his wand. "Eat your ramen yourself!" The fairy disappeared in a burst of sparkles.
What now? He totally lost it didn't he?
Turning to Hinata, her long hair covered her face.
Is she crying?
"Hey, are you eating that?" Her voice was low.
… "Thank you for making things work"
"G-Go… ahead." More elephant poop to his face.
Hinata Hyuuga ate the whole huge bowl quietly. She didn't say a word going to the vending machine of melon ice pop at the convenience store nearby. She dropped a coin, peeled the wrapper soon as it went out, and made slurping sounds.
Small stars appeared in the sky. The silence grew more uncomfortable each passing minute.
"Know what they say?... You are what you eat," Sasuke said, hoping to break the ice. "Well, you aren't sweet." He laughed awkwardly. It was a joke.
"Cold and hard." Hinata flicked the stick to the trash bin. "And proud of it… Remember when you asked yesterday how low I've sunken? I was scared out of my wits had you known where I lived and the things I do after school, especially towards the end of the month." Her frigid eyes cut to him, sending shivers down his spine. "See from your high pedestal how low I've sunken, and I'll drag you down with me."
Watching her back, his chest thundered. A lump formed at his throat. And he couldn't turn away.
Where are you taking yourself, Hyuuga?
Because he knew he was gravely mistaken. Their story was just beginning.