Kind of short and junk, but whatever. Thank you lots for the love. I'm sorry for not updating so quickly, but I've been super busy and my laptop is broken but I'm trying!

My head was throbbing.

And there's a goddamn circus going on outside my door.

So I finally shuffled out of my bed groaning in agony. No one deserves this sort of torture, I tell you. I pulled up some shorts and ran to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

What the fuck happened last night?

When I finished making my hygiene bearable, I migrated downstairs to see everyone happy, smiling and laughing. It was like some freaky alternate universe I wanted no part of. They all smiled at me pointing to my spot at the table. I nodded in thanks and took a seat.

However Ms. Gilbert made no eyes at me.

I poured myself a glass of orange juice and looked up at Caroline who was now openly grasping Nik, who wore the smuggest smile.

"I take it you two christened that guest room bed last night, yeah?" I said with a knowing smirk. Caroline blushed and threw a muffin at me. I held up the blueberry goodness and shook my head at her.

"Was that supposed to upset me?" She scoffed and shook her head. Bonnie slid over a bottle of Advil and winked at me.

"Bless you, Bennett."

"You were the life of the party last night," Damon said with a smirk, "I haven't seen you dance so much since karaoke at Dally's." I winced at the memory and grimaced. I snuck another peek at Elena who got up to get more toast. I nonchalantly stood up as well and walked over to the toaster.

"Hey," I said, ignoring the chatter at the table. She smiled in greeting and bit down on her lip.

"Let me in the loop, why are we being awkward right now?" She squinted her eyes and looked disbelievingly at me.

"You seriously don't remember last night?" I thought back and shrugged. Not really. I remember dancing before some alcohol kicked in.

"Vaguely."

She sighed in annoyance and tucked her hair behind her ears.

"Well you said something you shouldn't have, and it's awkward for me."

"What did I say?" She hesitated and looked down.

"I don't want to re-live this again, okay?"

"Just tell me," I argued, picking up some scrambled eggs on my plate. Delicious little things they were.

"You said that you wanted me to marry you and not Damon." I paused for a moment then grabbed a muffin off the tray.

"Well you made it sound like I told you to die or something."

She rolled her eyes and shook her head, "Can you be serious for one second, Stefan? Just a moment of not trying to hide everything you say with this…dry humor, and realize that what you said was completely inappropriate and that believe it or not this isn't some fantasy world we're living in right now. I'm marrying Damon, its reality." She stomped off back to the table and sat snuggled up next to Damon, who was laughing heartily with Bonnie.

"And this is why I drink," I murmured to myself as I dragged myself back to the table.

OooooO

"Basically, I told the guy to stuff it where the sun don't shine," Lexi bragged smiling brightly at Damon. Then they gave each other that look.

That fucking look. Lexi giggled and sighed when Damon passed her another piece of toast with that smile he always gives to every girl he could be interested in. Bonnie looked at me anxiously and I bit my lip.

Is today supposed to kill me?

"Lex, can I talk to you for a sec?" She nodded and got up from the table to follow me into the living room.

"What the hell is going on between you and Damon?" She looked shocked before she recovered and shrugged.

"He says that he thinks I'm a great girl, and I think he's a great guy. We almost kissed. That's it."

"That's not how it seemed to me." She growled and hit my shoulder. Fuck she hit hard. "Almost kissed my ass," I spat out.

"Calm your nonexistent tits. But don't over think this. We both agreed that even if there's something there, we won't act on it. Besides, bros before hoes." I had to grin at that before pulling her into a hug.

"Sorry I'm a slut," she teased leading us back to the room. Yeah, me too.

"What the fuck?"

"You said that out loud, jackass."

"The engagement party is in two days, I can't believe it," I heard Bonnie mutter. "So soon?" Elena peeked up at Damon who nodded.

The table quieted as Elena spoke, "Everything's wrapped up for the wedding, we have the perfect cake, perfect dress, perfect groom…"

"I'm going to take the trash out," I said before I threw up. I gave a tight smile and grabbed the trash on the way outside.

I'm not serious? I was serious about her. Fuck it, you know? Maybe I should forget her, move on.

But I can't. And it kills me.

Dry humor. My humor is anything but dry. More like wet. Like everything I touch.

Okay maybe I'm a bit immature at times. Part of the reason I loved Elena so much is because she loved the fact that I wasn't so serious all the time. She would be a little stiff sometimes, and I would bring her down a peg or two. And of course in turn, she'd have to push me sometimes and I fucking loved it; I loved her.

And if you asked me to list the reasons why, I could do it, it may take a while but I could. I just didn't know if she could do the same anymore, and it killed me.

"You okay?" Bonnie shouted, meeting me at the corner of the street with the trash cans. I nodded mutely and shrugged.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because this engagement party," she groaned, "It's killing me, how is it not killing you? Is there something going on between Damon and Lexi?" She asked nervously. I felt bad; at least my competition was one person, not two. I shrugged at her last question and finally answered her first.

"It's not killing me because maybe…maybe we're not as meant to be as we thought," I admitted. She peeked up at me with wide eyes, "Think about it, Bennett. If we were supposed to be together, why aren't we? Why are we wasting our time on them, huh? And why the hell would I want to relive the pain?"

I felt a smack across my face. "To be with the love of your life? What the hell has gotten into you? At that party, you better fix things with her, make it right. I'll do the same and if she doesn't want you, then that's it. But try, genuinely try."

So I would.

OooooooO

Champagne and chicken with a side of green beans and corn bread; what the hell kind of meal is this?

Okay, maybe I was biased from my cake/beer meal.

Elena and Damon sat at the head of the table, hugging and touching and being the most affectionate I'd seen in the longest.

And it was precisely for that reason that I took a sip of the champagne and another and another.

I was supposed to try though, remember?

I got a bit tipsy now, leaning back in my seat smiling like I was on top of the world. Which I was.

"We should make a toast!" My mother shouted happily. Elena stood and tapped the silver spoon to her glass, smiling down at everyone.

"I'm so happy that I can share such an important time of my life with you all, and I just thought that should be said before anything else happened." She sat and the table 'awwed' at her. As she gave her fiancé a kiss I stood up and clanked my only glass.

"But why only toast to the wedding? Why not toast to other things? Like, here's to the people who make mistakes and come back to fix things only to be humiliated and have false relationships shoved in their faces!"

The room filled with tension and Lexi yanked on my pant leg. "No no no no no, Lexi it's okay. You see, it's okay," I gestured to the people around us, "They know. Everyone knows about Elena and I's past, including Damon who went after my ex; thanks brother," I snided. I laughed lightly. That wall looks like a cloud.

"You're going to do this right now, Stefan? We're really here again?"

"What do you mean again, we never left 'here'!" I stalked toward him as he stood up, "We're never going to leave here, because for the life of me I can't understand why my own fucking brother went after my girlfriend."

"Ex-girlfriend, and maybe if you treated her right she wouldn't be looking anywhere else," he said with a cocky smirk. I barreled toward him, getting him square in the jaw so he tumbled backwards.

"Stop it! Stop!" My mother yelled pulling at Damon. Elena pulled me from my shoulders and pushed me out toward the door. I looked at the scene below me with Damon curled on the floor, still with that damn smug smirk. My mother cried and sniffled as she helped him up and through the alcohol I felt guilty.

Nik made a move to follow me out but I walked out on my own, throwing my glass to the floor and holding my head in my hands.

When she came out in her green dress with tears in her eyes my guilt doubled. "What the hell was that, Stefan!" Tiny fists pounded on my chest and I let her hit me. I deserved it.

"It's my engagement party, are you really going to do this with me now? How could you? Is this you trying to make me feel guilty? I don't need that right now! Damon has done nothing to deserve this! I have done nothing to deserve this!"

My head was thumping and I couldn't feel. Partially it was the alcohol, and partially it was seeing her face. There was just so much disappointment and it was something I never wanted to see from her.

She kept yelling, and fuck. I don't know but I was fed up because I was pissed too. I've been angry since this whole mess even started. I was mad at her for being mad at me and for being disappointed and making me feel guilty for wanting her back. Because I do. I'm not here to make my brothers life hell, I'm here because I want to spend my life with her. I just...I know she's making a mistake, they both are making a mistake. Damon still has unresolved feelings for two different girls and Elena still loves me. I know she does because finally I've had the privilege of seeing her look at me the way she did years ago.

So I tugged her wrists and pushed her against the wall nearest to us. It was so sudden that she gasped and tensed against me. We were at such close proximity, I could feel her, taste her and sense every emotion she felt. We weren't kissing, but the way that she was breathing...we were trading air. It was intimate, close and comfortable. My hands locked around hers at either side of her and her chest moved up and down brushing mine with every breath

"I love you, Elena." It wasn't what I planned on saying, but I said it anyway. I could smell the alcohol from her lips and resisted the urge to kiss her.

"I love you so fucking much it hurts. And you know I could find another girl, someone pretty and smart and average and someone who doesn't frustrate the hell out of me, or steal my shirts or eat all the food off of my plate or kick me in my sleep or chew gum so damn loud and..." I stroked the side of her face, releasing her hand. "She wouldn't be you."

I let go of her and stepped away, stumbling as I walked. "I came back for you Elena. I came back to start over because I can't imagine a life with you not being with me. I can't pretend that I don't love you anymore. And I sure as hell can't watch you walk down the aisle looking stunning and marry my brother knowing it should have been me." Her eyes were downcast, but lifted to meet mine filled with unshed tears.

"I'm selfish because I want you to be with me."

"Stefan I can't anymore. I told you that I can't.."

"No Elena you can...I just." I pinched the bridge of my nose and faced her again.

"I need you to go back ten years ago. I don't deserve it, I know that. But I need you to choose me again. Let it be me again. Let it be Stefan and Elena. And if you can't then...I'll leave. You can get married and I won't bother you again if that's what you want."

"Stefan..."

"Just please. Let me know if loving you is in vain. Because then I can try to move on, Elena. I can at least try." I stepped closer and closer to her until we were looking each other square in the eyes.

"Tell me now. Look at me and tell me you don't love me, and that you want Damon."

She stammered and I left my eyes on her, unmoving. She finally stopped and shut her mouth before licking her lips.

"Just as I thought," I murmured, and then I kissed her; the sweetest taste of sin.

Her lips softly caressed mine, in something indescribable. Our relationship, our life was just that; indescribable. I cradled her face in my hands and kept prolonging this, because it wasn't Damon or Bonnie or Lexi or Klaus or Caroline or anyone, just us. But before I could hold her in my arms, something I've been waiting to do for so long, she pushed on my chest.

"I love you, Stefan," she said, looking down with her voice cracking, "but I love Damon too. And I want to marry him tomorrow." My blood ran cold and I quickly recuperated and slowly nodded.

"I won't be there."

"Stefan, please-"

"You can't have both. My vacation is over, and you were right; I have to face reality," I said, my voice void of emotion, "You're getting married and I need to move on. I can't do that by going to an old flames wedding to my brother. I know that you don't mean what you're saying but I get that it's a tough situation for you and that it isn't just black and white. I tried to wait for you, Elena. I can't wait forever."

So I told her how I felt without 'dry humor' and I felt like shit the entire way home to purchase a plane ticket back home.

REVIEEEW!