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SWEET SUMMER RAIN

Chapter 7

Kerri took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she pedaled. John had only been gone a day, but the team that was Sam and Evelyn had already started to drive her crazy. The toddlers had been fine on the shorter rides they'd taken, which only made Dean more determined to take them to the store. Kerri couldn't really blame him, though-- after all, he hadn't been separated from his brother in nearly three years. The seven year old glanced over to Dean as she rode, smirking when she saw him shoot an annoyed look at the kids behind them.

The pair of three year olds had been fine when they started the trip, asking question after question, but only mildly annoying. Now, however, they were really beginning to grate on Kerri's nerves. They had started singing 'my butt hurts' about ten minutes before hand and, even after ensuring their older siblings that their butts didn't really hurt-- they still had yet to stop singing.

"Do you two want to stop?" Kerri asked, looking back at the two trike-riding three year olds.

"No," they answered in unison.

"Are you sure?"

"We fine, K." Sam nodded, standing up to pedal, realizing he was falling behind.

"Then why do you keep saying your butts hurt?"

"You said butt." Sam cheered, Evelyn laughing at his side.

Kerri heard Dean laugh beside her, trying to cover it up as a cough. She just shook her head and started to pedal harder, moving herself back into the lead. This had always been such a peaceful ride, too. This used to be her private time, her alone time. Riding her bike was like peace to Kerri, a time when the reality of her life could be forgotten. When she was off riding; her father wasn't a hunter, her mother wasn't dead-- no, the world was perfect. But, while it was perfect, it was also incredibly lonely.

Kerri knew not to get attached, though, knew to keep her distance. She had seen too much come and go in her short life, had had too many things taken away from her. And for the little girl the easiest way not to get hurt, was to not get attached in the first place. Besides, she was fine on her own. She knew how to take care of herself and Evelyn, and had her father's permission to go pretty much anywhere. Nope, she was already completely self sufficient, so why add anyone else to the mix.

"How much further is it?" Dean asked, breaking Kerri out of her inner thoughts.

"Not too far. You'll be able to see it from the next hill."

"Cool."

"Do you need to rest?" Kerri asked, remembering her first ride to the store.

She was five years old the first time she road to the store alone, and it had seemed like an eternity. Evelyn had been sick that day, and their father had insisted that Kerri stay away. So, she did the only thing she could think of, she hopped on her new bike and just started pedaling. She had every intention of going into the forest, but the second she'd reached the trees, she knew it was a place she didn't want to go. She could never really explain her fears, and her father not believing a word she said wasn't helpful, she just knew the forest was not a place she would ever go of her own free will. It was a fear Evelyn had seemed to have developed too, and while Kerri didn't want her little sister to be afraid of anything, she decided that, if it kept Ev out of the trees, that was good enough for her.

"Nah, I'm ok. I just wanna get there."

"You'll like it, Dean. They've got all sorts of soda and ice creams, it's awesome."

"I don't really have any money, Kerri."

"No problem, the Matthews give me whatever I want. They have two kids, too."

"Cool, our ages?"

"Keith is a few years older than me, his sister Stacy is still a little baby. They don't like Mrs. Miller and her family one bit, it's kind of funny."

"I thought everyone liked Mrs. Miller?"

"Pretty much. They do own almost the whole town."

"How did they manage that?"

"They're the ones that founded it. My dad said Sadie Miller wasn't old enough to be one of the original founders, but I think he's lying."

"Yeah," Dean laughed, breathing a little harder as they pedaled up the hill. "She was really old."

"Really, really old," Evelyn answered, Sam snickering beside her. Kerri just smiled, her little toddler posse backing her up.

Kerri let out a long breath a few minutes later, thankful to be at the top of the hill. It was the steepest hill on the ride to the store, but it was also the most rewarding-- cause all she had to do now was coast down the street and into the shop's parking lot. That was what brought her to the store the first time. She had known the Matthews from town, but had never been to their store-- until she saw it like a beacon at the bottom of a big hill, that is.

"Is that it?" Dean asked, breathing hard.

"Yup."

"That ride wasn't too bad."

"Nah, it's really nothing. You'll get used to it over time."

"We here," Sam and Ev cheered a few seconds later, pushing their trikes up the hill.

"How we get there now, K?" Sam asked, sitting back on his bike as though he'd ridden it up the hill.

"Just roll to the bottom. Remember not to go too fast."

"Like sledding?" Sam continued, a smile growing across his face as he spoke about the previous winter.

"Kind of. Do you know where the brakes are on your bike?" Kerri asked, and both little kids squeezed the hand brakes in reply. "Good. If you start going too fast, just use the brakes and you'll slow down."

"And if I tell you you're going too fast, Sammy, use the brakes to slow down," Dean added, eyeing his brother.

Sam just snickered, pushing forward until his bike started rolling down the hill of its own accord. Dean remained where he was for a few seconds, his hands tightening on the brakes of his own bike. Kerri could see he was a little worried about going down the hill, but they'd made it too far to turn back now.

"It's not as scary as it looks."

"I'm not scared."

"Sure. Race ya to the bottom." And with that, Kerri let of her brakes, sending her bike down the large hill.

Kerri loved the feeling of the wind on her face, loved the idea of being free. The air in her house always felt so heavy, so stale, but outside and alone, things were fresher, easier. She didn't know why things were so hard when her father was around, she just knew what she knew. It was like being in a hot hot room with no breeze, or being cramped in a small car with too many people. It was just over powering, and something Kerri could barely stand. She needed to be out where the air was fresher, needed to feel like she could breath. Ever since her mother died, things in her family had changed, and the seven year old held on to whatever she could from the past.

However, those few memories were getting more and more distant with each passing year. She used to be able to remember how her mother smelled, used to remember the sound of her voice, but those two things were now gone from the little girl's mind. She could still remember what she looked like, her long auburn hair falling in curls around her face, her smile brighter than any Kerri had ever seen. Even at night, she could feel her mother, and, if she listened hard enough, she swore she could still hear her singing. Kerri knew not to tell her father or Evelyn any of this, though.

Her dad hadn't gotten over her mom's death, and Kerri was certain he never would. And Evelyn-- she didn't need to hear stories about someone she would never be able to know. As it stood, the toddler didn't know what she was missing, didn't know her family was different, and Kerri wasn't going to be the one to tell her. She relished her little sister's innocents. Whenever she was with Evelyn she didn't feel like she was missing anything, didn't feel like she had to live up to anything.

Her father always seemed to see something else when he looked at her, like she was nothing more than a window into the past, and no matter how much he tried to hide it, Kerri could see it every time. She couldn't blame him though, after all, she had known her mom longer than Evelyn had, of course her dad would remember all that. No matter what she told herself she understood, though, it still made her feel like an alien. Evelyn was the normal one while she was the freak.

"Kerri?" Dean's voice broke Kerri out of her thoughts, the young girl surprised to see that she had stopped her bike right in front of the door.

"Yeah?"

"You ok, you kind of zoned out there for a minute."

"I'm alright. I just need some soda."

"Ok." Dean eyed her again before making his way over to Sam and Evelyn, the little kids both cheering 'we did it' as they entered the shop.

Kerri watched the three disappear into the darkened doorway, momentarily torn. She liked being alone, it was something she would never deny. When she was alone she was normal, she was good enough, which was something she didn't really have when other people were involved. But Dean was different. He accepted her for who she was, befriended her even after she'd tried to push him away. He was like a breeze in a crowded room, a sweet summer rain on a hot dry day-- he was something she needed more than she would ever know.