So, I decided to do something a little different this chapter, and make it a little more fluffy. I'm also jumping ahead to the show time, so the Black brothers are all grown up in this one. Hope you enjoy!
Dina did her best to not let old feelings (good or bad) resurface while she spoke with Johnathan. Not when he looked at her with those deep, soulful eyes, not when he tried to apologize for what he'd done, not when his voice cracked as he told her how badly he didn't want to fight, or even when he held her hand. She was mostly successful. Dina knew she would always care for both of the brothers, no matter what happened between any of them. They were her family. Anything else. . . Well, she could deal with that once they got Johnny out of this miserable place.
They were silent for a while, just holding hands, looking at each other, and feeling the weight of all of the things that would need to be said eventually. Dina lowered her eyes to their joined hands and opened her mouth to speak, but Johnathan beat her to it.
"How's Cam?" he asked with that gentle concern that was generally reserved just for his twin.
Dina smiled softly at him. "You're in prison, fighting like hell. . . and you ask about Cameron?" It was typical Johnathan, really. She wasn't all that surprised if she was being honest. Johnathan shrugged in response. "You've seen him, Johnny. You've talked to him. You know how he's doing."
"I know Cam will always say he's fine, especially when he's not," Johnathan replied. "How is he really? That Agent Daniels isn't giving him too much freedom to operate, is she? 'Cause you know that Cam will do all kinds of reckless stuff if no one stops him, and then he gets himself hurt, and he won't tell anyone until he absolutely has to, and-"
"Breathe, Johnny." Dina squeezed his hand tightly and covered it with her other hand. "He's fine, really. . . For the most part, anyway."
Johnathan frowned deeply. "What does that mean?"
Dina sighed. "It means. . . Cameron has spent his whole life with one major safety net: you. It didn't matter how crazy things got, how hard a trick was, how bad the situation- He always had you, darling. You kept him focused, steady. Now, with you in here. . ." She bit her lips together for a moment. "He's struggling. He spirals, sometimes, and it generally takes all three of us to calm him down and keep his head in the game. You know how he is." Johnathan did know, that was what worried him. He was ready to press Dina for more information, but it turned out he didn't need to. "He's started tapping."
He wasn't sure he heard her right. "He started what?"
"Tapping," Dina answered simply. "You know. . When he starts feeling overwhelmed or anxious. . It would drive us mad if we didn't know why he was doing it."
Johnathan felt a simultaneous pang of guilt and nostalgia. "I haven't done that in years," he said in a slightly husky voice.
"You haven't needed to. He's been in charge of his own stunts for years, he has a team who listens to him and doesn't push him to his breaking point-" Unlike someone who was quite lucky he never met Dina, or he wouldn't have been long for this world. "-and, most importantly, he had you there, right beside him. With you so out of reach, I think he's falling back on old coping mechanisms to, well. . cope."
He didn't know how to respond to that; he was too overcome with too many emotions. Mostly, Johnathan just wanted to wrap his arms around Cam and tell him it was all going to be okay. The team knew Cam pretty well-better than most-and he knew they would look out for the incorrigible man, but no one would take care of him like Johnathan could. It was mostly because no one could read Cameron Black as well as the twin who spent their entire lives studying him and mimicking him perfectly. "You would think. ." Johnny started slowly. "That for all the time he's spent around people, Cam would be better at being by himself, but. . . he's not." Of course, by 'by himself', Johnathan meant 'without me'. "I hoped that now that we're adults, and he has you, the team. . . I thought he'd be okay." He wasn't one for optimism, usually, but in this case, he'd indulged himself.
"He is, Johnny," Dina said soothingly. "He is okay, for the most part. The cases keep him busy, which keeps him from obsessing. . but when he's not obsessing over your case, he feels like he's failing you, then he starts to put all this pressure on himself. It's- It's a vicious cycle, Johnny, but one that we're helping him manage. He's not chugging those little five-hour energy drinks every couple of hours to avoid sleeping, so that's something." She couldn't help chuckling when Johnathan groaned and ran his free hand down his face.
"Please don't remind me- I thought we were going to have to tie his hyper ass to his bed until he crashed. He slept for about twenty hours after that, didn't he?" It was rhetorical, and he knew Dina knew it. Johnathan knew exactly how long it was, because he'd sat with Cameron for nearly the whole twenty-one hours (and twelve minutes, forty-seven seconds).
"Something like that," she agreed with a fond smile. They'd been in their early twenties, and the team had only been together for a few years, then. She couldn't remember what Cameron thought he needed to stay awake for, only how worried they'd all been; none of them more worried than Johnathan. "But like I said, he hasn't fallen back on that particular old habit. All things considered, I think he's alright. He's just worried about you."
Johnathan started tapping unconsciously and almost smiled. Almost. "Of course he is. He worries about everyone but himself." Cameron had always been like that. Granted, in this instance, he had plenty of reasons to be worried about Johnathan.
"Right. And you never do that," Dina said with a knowing smirk. "You're far too sensible."
Johnathan looked offended. "I worry about myself plenty." Especially in the past year he'd been incarcerated.
"But you worry about Cam more."
He couldn't argue that, so he only offered Dina a look that said 'Well, yeah, of course.'
"Well, I should- I should probably. . be getting back," she said, almost reluctantly. She was glad she'd come, was glad she'd been able to see Johnny for herself, but it also opened up some not-too-old wounds that she'd worked very hard to patch up.
Johnathan nodded like he understood, and he really did. He'd honestly never expected Dina to come visit him, or ever speak to him again, really. This was a small miracle as far as he was concerned. "Yeah, yeah, I know. Just- Wait for a second." Johnathan tightened his grip on her hand when Dina tried to stand up. "Next time Cam gets like that. . . Could you call me?"
"He's not gonna like that," Dina said softly. It wasn't a refusal, though.
"Dina, please."
She nodded finally and squeezed his hand. "Alright, Johnny. Alright," she promised. Dina walked to the door and signaled the guard to let her out. Just before she left, she turned back to Johnathan. "Stay safe, Johnny."
Okay. I've been working on this sporadically for about a week, whenever inspiration hit me, so some ideas may be a tad disjointed. This is by no means my best chapter, but I really like how this turned out. I think I'm gonna make it a two-parter of sorts, with there actually being a phone call where Johnny calms Cam down.
Thank you all so much for reading this story! Reviews are always appreciated; I love reading what you think.
