14 reviews? You guys are the best :)
Heh, bath time in this one ^^ and even more in next one :P Yesh, I'm on a roll. I've even started next chapter already ^^
Oh, and thanks to Homer4242 for this bath idea ^^
Premise: Ryuk convinces the shinigami King to turn Light into a cat so that he can infiltrate L. Only problem is…L hates cats.
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note.
Of Cats and Cake
Chapter 7
It happened so fast he hardly had time to process it. With the slam of a door far away or perhaps close and down the hall, Light couldn't tell, but with that sound, L reverted back to normal.
He stared warily and dubiously into dead charcoal eyes once again.
But then…oh, but then! Holy fucking shit!
What happened next would scar him for life.
L had decided it would be a good idea to get naked and he proceeded to do just THAT.
The white shirt was the first to go and Light's eyes became miniature saucers upon seeing L's disgustingly pale skin. Disgusting. He cringed. It was so disgusting. White. It was so white. If he just took one deft claw and scratched it down that long, thin surface he was sure he'd manage to paint a beautiful picture. He cackled madly, or tried to. It would sure as hell be a nice contrast to the UGLY that was L.
Light decided then and there that once he became 'normal' again, Kira would make tanning salons justice because it had to be a crime to look like THAT.
He cackled some more. He was hilarious!
He crinkled his nose and felt the whiskers bouncing off his wet cheeks. He glanced down at the very feline attributes. Fuzzy cheeks, drenched paws; …no opposable thumbs. He sighed and frowned in distaste.
He chose that moment to look up and couldn't stop the bile from rising. It was just so disgusting.
He vomited…all over himself.
"Cat-san!" L scolded, but Light wasn't looking up and he hardly cared to listen to L's reprimands. The sight he had been met with was enough to send him into an epileptic fit…or rather, a catatonic state in which he seemed to be finding himself at the very moment.
L was stark naked. No boxers, no nothing, and…it was all…so, so PALE. If he hadn't eaten anything for about a day due to a certain DETECTIVE he would have saved some vomit for L…when he finally decided to man up and step closer. Coward.
How vile! Who the hell did he think he was? Light snorted, I bet he doesn't even WEAR boxers or any other underwear for that matter.
And then Light was thrown out of the tub, across the wet floor, his fur too soaked to be able to step on the tiled floor without slipping and he skidded into the trashcan in the corner with a loud 'oomph', making sure to mewl loudly in protest at his horrible OWNER'S behavior. He scoffed.
The nerve.
He straightened himself out with as much DIGNITY as he could, being a cat and all, and fixed his eyes on L.
What he saw made him quickly avert his eyes again. What the hell was wrong with that man? Did he have no pride, no dignity, NO SHAME? L was stood, bent OVER, cleaning the tub….or rather, that was what Light assumed the socially awkward detective was doing. There really was no telling what went through that head of his. Who cleans a tub LIKE THAT? If this were prison…Light shuddered at the thought.
He smirked. Perhaps he should teach L a lesson or two on etiquette. Sending L to prison instead of killing him seemed like a fine idea just about now.
While L was busy scrubbing, Light was busy snoozing. It had been an exhausting day and though he'd rather not admit it, he didn't have the stamina L had and he couldn't be awake all hours of the day. Especially not when he'd been frying in the sun for a few hours. So…he slept.
He was rudely awakened by a loud pounding. He surmised it was the door. He blearily opened one eye and inspected the room for any potential danger. Gas, AMMONIA, ropes; anything that could be used against him in any way…but there was none. He opened both eyes when he heard the sound of running water. He looked up.
He raised one nonexistent eyebrow at seeing a bush of black in the tub. So, there was no danger. He smiled.
He proceeded to watch L. When those intimidating, scrutinizing eyes weren't focused on him, he could actually rest easy. That hadn't happened at all in the time he'd known L, so he closed his eyes, deeming the treat nonexistent, and went back to sleep.
There was a very persistent knock on the door. Again. It was starting to piss him off.
Light opened his eyes and glared at the door, then focused his eyes on the tub and glared some more.
L.
The detective was still there soaking, which left…Watari. He frowned. As much as the old man seemed to have taken a liking to him, that didn't exactly mean Light had to like him back. He sneered. Senile old man. He sure had the worst timing.
And then the door opened.
He yelped as the door caught his tail and severely BRUTALIZED it upon opening.
"Kitty?" Watari asked carefully and then looked around the bathroom searching for his presence.
He seemed to finally spot Light and the cat growled deep in his throat, baring his fangs, his fur puffed out menacingly, warning Watari to stay the fuck away.
Watari sighed and turned to L.
"What have you been doing?" he seemed to demand.
L opened one owlish eye and squinted at Watari, the rest of his face hidden underneath the water.
He raised his head enough for his lips to reach the surface and mumbled, "I am taking a bath." As if it wasn't obvious enough.
Watari stiffened and straightened out to his full height.
"I can see that, L," he seemed to hiss, at least that's what it seemed like to Light, "What I meant was, why on earth is the kitty wet but still dirty?" he paused, gauging a reaction out of L…of which he got only a weak glare, "You wouldn't by any chance have tried anything…funny, would you?"
L grumbled, "Of course not."
Light couldn't see Watari's face because the old man's back was to him but he assumed the old man was grinning very smugly right about now. It sure as hell seemed like it from his tone.
And then…damn it! Again! He was picked up by the scruff AGAIN and then…he was plopped down into the FILTHY L infested water along with the menace himself.
He froze.
This was too disgusting. The water was so brown he couldn't even see L's nasty paleness…
He realized with horror that Watari was still in the room. This meant, of course, that if he were to try to climb out of the tub, as had happened with L, he'd be promptly pushed down again. Just his luck. He scowled some more.
L eyed him innocently, his face once again hidden in the water, only the eyes and the mop of wet hair visible.
Light sighed and tried desperately to ENDURE but it was hard. Really hard. Especially when Watari spoke.
"You're not leaving until the both of you are as fresh as daisies. Is that clear?"
L eyed him and pouted, not that Watari could see that, but Light, being almost drowned in the deep water, deep for a cat at least, could spot it perfectly.
"Yes, Watari." Came the perfect monotone and then the door slammed and they were alone.
Fucking perfect.
If I offended anyone with the 'epileptic fit' thing, I'm sorry. Epilepsy runs in our family and my mom has it, as does my uncle, and my aunt, so I know it sucks.
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