Chapter 6
Disclaimer: I don't own LOST or Catch and Release.
A/N: Okay you guys have been enjoying the fluff but there's gonna be a little angst this chapter.
Kate felt horrible and it wasn't because she was sorry for kissing Sawyer. She shouldn't have ran. She couldn't help it. What made it worse was that she didn't regret it. She felt that she should have. It would be wrong of her not to. She couldn't be in a relationship so soon after Jack died. It wasn't right.
At the same time, if it wasn't right, then Sawyer wouldn't have kissed her back. Maybe it was okay. Maybe they could have a relationship. Sawyer hadn't been with anyone since the bathroom incident, at least she didn't think so. This could be a life changing experience for them both.
Kate sighed as she ran farther and farther. She couldn't go home. Sawyer would be there and she wasn't ready to talk to him. Her mind ran through places she could go to, but as she ran, she realized she was getting closer to the gravesite where Jack was buried. Tears began to fall from her eyes as she ran through the gate and found herself in front of Jack's grave.
She collapsed on the ground and read the gravestone that had his name and his date of birth and death. Below that it read:
He will always be remembered by his parents, friends, and fiancée.
She didn't like it. She never wanted them to put that on there, but they wanted it. It was like his parents didn't want her to move on, to have a new life. But she deserved a happy life, didn't she?
Maybe she didn't. Maybe she wasn't supposed to move on. She knew she would never forget the impact that Jack had on her life, but now she realized that she was capable of loving someone else that could be just as special, maybe even more. She closed her eyes as she remembered the times she had spent with Jack.
Sawyer had figured out where she had gone and went after her. Now he stood behind her.
"I miss him too."
Kate opened her eyes.
When Kate didn't show any sign of moving, Sawyer continued, looking down at the grass. "Yeah, he was a great guy. Lots of fun. Even if he was hard on himself. He got me outta a lot of trouble a bunch of times."He paused, but she didn't do anything. He wondered if she regretted kissing him.
"He would want you to move on Kate." He said quietly. "He wouldn't want you to sit around moping all the time."
When Kate still didn't do anything, Sawyer sighed. "Look, all I'm sayin is that I understand what you're goin through, cause I'm goin through it too, and if you just want us to keep movin on and pretend what happened back there didn't happen, then I will."
Sawyer turned around and went back to the house, not knowing what else to say.
A couple of hours later Kate went home. She dreaded facing Sawyer again, but she knew that she would have to sometime.
She opened the door and Charlie stood up from the couch. "Kate! Hi!"
"Hi Charlie." Kate said quietly, hoping that he wouldn't be able to tell that she had been crying.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I'm fine." Kate moved past him, but he grabbed onto her arm.
"Kate, you know you can tell me anything."
Kate stared into Charlie's eyes. "I just went to the graveyard. That's all."
Charlie let go of Kate and she started to go to her bedroom. Charlie sighed and sat down back on the couch.
"Hey Charlie?" Kate turned around.
"What?"
"Have you seen Sawyer lately?"
"Yeah he's in the backyard, why?"
"Just wondering." Kate went into her bedroom and Charlie went into the kitchen where Hurley was making waffles.
"Waffles for dinner?" Charlie made a face.
"Yeah dude. You've never done that before?"
"No."
"Have you ever had pizza for breakfast?" Hurley asked.
"No."
Hurley's eyes widened. "Dude. Go get the phone."
"Why?"
Sawyer walked into the kitchen to find Hurley ordering an extra large pizza with Charlie standing next to him with a huge grin on his face.
"There's pizza for dinner?" Sawyer asked.
"No this is for breakfast tomorrow. They won't let us order that early in the morning so we're ordering it now." Hurley explained.
"Those bastards." Charlie said.
Sawyer raised his eyebrows. "Okay then. Have you guys seen Kate around?"
"Yeah she just got home. She's in Jack's room, or her room." Charlie said, looking confused.
Sawyer nodded and went into the living room where he watched tv.
"Hey Hurley." Charlie said as soon as Hurley got off the phone.
"What?"
"Is it just me, or do Kate and Sawyer seem kind of mopey today?"
"Is that even a word?" Hurley asked.
"I don't know!"
"Yeah you're right. They do." Hurley and Charlie watched through the opening in the kitchen door as Kate walked out into the living room. She saw Sawyer and their eyes briefly met before Kate headed for the kitchen. Charlie and Hurley quickly moved away as she came through the door.
"Hey guys. What's for dinner?"
"Waffles!" Hurley said proudly.
"Okay."
"Yeah and they're ready so you can go tell Sawyer that we can eat now."
"I don't think I'm going to eat with you guys tonight." Kate said.
"Yes you are." Charlie said. "Now go tell Sawyer."
Kate sighed and went into the living room. "Sawyer?"
Sawyer looked at her. "What?"
"Dinner's ready."
Sawyer turned off the tv and went into the kitchen with her where they sat at the table. Charlie and Hurley sat at the ends of the table while Kate and Sawyer sat on opposite sides of the table.
The dinner was quiet and Charlie and Hurley watched Sawyer and Kate carefully throughout it. When the syrup had been nearer to Sawyer than Hurley, Kate had asked Hurley instead, and when the butter had been closer to Kate than Charlie, Sawyer had asked Charlie for it.
After dinner was done, Kate offered to clear the table and wash the dishes. Charlie and Hurley went into the living room to watch tv, and Sawyer went into the backyard.
"There's definitely something wrong with them dude." Hurley said as they watched a sitcom on the tv.
"Yeah. How are we going to figure it out?" Charlie asked.
"I don't know."
Kate stood in front of the sink washing dishes when Sawyer came up beside her. "Let me dry." Sawyer picked up a towel and began to dry the dishes that she had already set down.
"Okay. Thanks." Kate avoided Sawyer's gaze.
They washed the dishes in silence for a few minutes before Sawyer spoke up. "So Hurley and Charlie are gonna have pizza for breakfast tomorrow."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Well that's not healthy."
"Well neither is waffles for dinner!"
"True."
"So what's the deal with you?" Sawyer asked.
"What?" Kate's heart beat faster.
"You come home and don't even say hi. How rude is that?"
Kate laughed a little and Sawyer grinned as he continued. "I mean, didn't your parents ever teach you manners?"
"How about you?" Kate retorted as she looked up at Sawyer for the first time since they had started washing the dishes.
"What about me?"
"You don't even come to greet me when I do come home. I think you're the one that needs to work on manners." Kate turned the water off and they began to put away the dishes.
"So what now?" Sawyer asked as he stared at Kate.
"Well, we could do the floor." Kate said while smiling.
Sawyer looked down. "Yeah."
"What are we doing?" Kate said seriously.
"What?"
Kate just stared at Sawyer.
"I don't know what you're thinking, but I thought that we were talking about doing the floor." Sawyer said.
Kate nodded her head. "Yeah, I guess so." Sawyer watched her as she left the kitchen. He shook his head and sighed.
It was the middle of the night and Kate still couldn't sleep. She had spent the rest of the evening and the night trying to figure out how to tell Sawyer that she did want a relationship with him. She didn't understand why it was so hard, but it was. Finally, she settled on something. She stood up and left her room and went into the living room where Sawyer was sleeping on the pull out mattress in the couch, or so she thought.
He was laying there, but he wasn't sleeping. He had also spent the whole night thinking of Kate and wondering if he would be able to hold back his feelings for her if she didn't want a relationship.
Suddenly he felt movement beside him, and he turned over to find Kate laying down on the bed staring at him.
"What are you doing up Freckles?" he asked softly.
"Shh." She quieted him as she leaned in to kiss him and he kissed her back.
She pulled away and stared at him, waiting to see what he would say.
Sawyer looked at her in the darkness, her eyes a picture of perfection, and in that moment he knew that everything was going to be okay. He leaned in to kiss her again while he pulled her closer to him. She snuggled up against him and he kissed her forehead.
"So this is how it's gonna be Freckles? We're gonna fight and then make up at night?"
"We didn't fight. I just needed some time."
Suddenly they heard some noise and they turned as they watched Hurley come into the room. They laid perfectly still as he moved into the kitchen. Kate gave Sawyer another kiss, and then she went back into her bedroom.
Sawyer moved so that he was laying on his back, and he smiled as he realized that Kate really did love him. He couldn't wait to see what was going to happen next.