DISCLAIMER: I DISCLAIM NOTHING! ...Except for the fact that I don't own Invader Zim! No, wait...that sentence don't work right... And neither did that one.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: You may have to take notes. This could get messy. By that, I mean that if you wanted all of that info, then you should've been listening, instead of poking your fingers into your nose! *Evil glares* You know who you are...!

CHAPTER 7: Where's Prisoner #777 When You Need 'Im?!

Nobody cared enough to keep track of the time, so nobody cared when it was that this next conversation was taking place...

"Well, alright..." Said Vrilly, "Lard-nar and Lasch-mik have finally gone to sleep, so that means that they'll be out for a while," she stated this, looking in their general directions. "Ploopoh still hasn't gotten enough sleep, I'm sure," she pointed out to him. Ploopoh nodded, as this seemed to be the case. He had just awoken briefly when there was more noise, but aside from getting some fruit, he looked like he was about to drop off at any moment. "I can only assume that Shloonktapooxis is asleep:" she gestured to him where he was floating and wriggling, with his eyes closed, in the air. "And, Tarky and Clasps are too weakened to go out on any gathering missions. That leaves only... Vick, Nessie, Throbulator, Crystal, Tak, and Dib...I think. Is that everyone?" She asked, looking from alien face to alien face.

She'd been asked by Vick when they were contemplating the group who would go out and gather more cleaning materials, who would be able to go. The Almighty Tallest were absolutely insistent upon this, and it was not in their best interests to irritate each other with their lack of hygiene. Considerably, there was much less arguing and stuff, but that still didn't make it that easy!

"Hey, wait a minute! You left me out!" Exclaimed Starky suddenly. "I'm able to go out to collect stuff!" He seemed somehow offended by this, and the part at the top of his head was turning bright blue.

"Yeah, and I left myself out, too!" Added Vrilly, as if to calm him with her lack of memory. "I'm sorry. If we're talking about people who are able-bodied, then perhaps even the Almighty Tallest, and Adviser Sploods should be added to that list;" she explained.

"No need, we don't need any weak and wimpy Adviser and his leaders botching up our scavenging!" Replied Vick swiftly. Nessie turned to look at her. He'd finally gotten on his pants and regular underwear, but was contemplating how hot he'd be, wearing his shirt. It was looking like he'd never get his coat back, but he'd managed to steal it back for a while, to wash.

"You know, you're really getting a whole lot surlier, the longer we stay here!" Nessie commented, then looked over at his coat to see if it was done soaking yet. He decided not to rot the fabric, and pulled it out, much to the nearby rock-looking fuzzy-monsters' dismay. "What?!" He asked; he was at the edge of camp, and hadn't realized that they were indeed not rocks, but animals. In this place, it was hard to tell.

"What?! I was only tellin' the truth!" Replied Vick with a wave of her hand.

"*Sigh* Well, you didn't need to say it like that," replied Nessie, as he tried to keep his cool. Deciding that those alien things were gone by now, he wrung out his coat and then hung it up to dry.

A brief wind blew by, and he basked in the coolness of the old-fashioned air-conditioning. Then he turned to look at them, "What?"

"Agent Loch Nessie seems to be missing his Loch!" Replied Vick with a snirk.

"Hah hah, whatever!" Nessie replied, not bothering to regale them with the reason.

"He's just hot," replied Dib, whilest he contemplated staying there against making Tak even angrier if he went out.

"Come on!" Vick giggled. "It can't be THAT much hotter here than in- in Scotland!"

"I'm not the one who lives in -uh, wait, where do you guys live, again?" Asked Nessie, suddenly confused.

"Red City," replied Vick.

"Yeah, me, too. Red City. And, right now, it's pretty comfy." Added Dib, who was wearing his black, leather trench-coat.

"Wulugh! The Red City...! It always gave me this sickening coating of pollution on my skin...!" Mumbled Nessie as he fixed his coat to the tree-branch it was hanging off of, so that it wouldn't fall.

"Well, YEAH~! Why do you think they changed its name?!" Vick replied snarkily.

"Heh heh heh, THAT, and, being named after demons didn't help with the tourism, any..." added Dib with a half-hearted laugh.

"Woah, they named a city after them?!" Replied Tallest Purple in excitement.

"You know, that reminds me of that one planet," added Ploopoh.

"Oh, yeah! Heh, heh!" Tallest Red giggled. Even Sploods had to giggle at that.

"Psshhh! They should've just named it the 'Pretties-purple-eys'! Like I'd wanted them to!" Tallest Purple replied, and this time not just Tallest Red and Sploods were staring at him.

"Riiight... Well, getting back on track, you guys," started Vick, but this was interrupted by the Almighty Tallest once again.

"HEY! Why'd they name that place the 'Red City'?!" Tallest Red asked, strangely interested in any place that had his favorite color and his namesake in its name.

Vick looked around, confused about this type of question when they should've been talking about gathering supplies and stuff. Agent Nessie answered, instead. "I believe it's because of the pollution," he stated, but paused and didn't elaborate.

"The pollution makes the sky look a burnt reddish and orange color, most of the time." Tak elaborated, ending the conversation.

"Oooh, nice!" Tallest Red stated, satisfied. Tallest Purple seemed happy, too. Well, somewhat.

"You know, I really like it when planets have a different-colored sky," he replied, staring somewhat off into the distance. Then he returned. "Ah, well!"

"Well...this has been an interesting break... But, we really haven't decided who's going out to gather all of those, eh, cleaning supplies, and stuff." Vick stated slowly, wondering why in the heck they couldn't just decide and get it over with.

"YOU'RE not one of the ones who's benefiting, so what would YOU care?!" Exclaimed Tallest Purple suddenly, pointing at her.

"That's...wait, what?! I thought that the point was for us to be working together as a group!" Replied Vick in confusion. The Almighty Tallest apparently did not like the conversation to change right at that moment. They also liked colors.

"Calm down, now," Tallest Red was saying in low tones to Tallest Purple. "We really need to- not! cause trouble! With these aliens! Now, we'll just work as a group..."

Tak decided that looking into their minds wasn't worth the trouble it would bring, despite her intense confusion. Well, more like Dib's projected confusion.

"I-I'm not one to interrupt, like, the Tallests' musings, but, uh... When are we going to get GOING?!" Asked Starky, raising his hand. The top part of his head had now started turning more orange, in response to his apparent anxiousness.

After the subsequent arm and leg-twisting of Starky, the group chosen to head out was Agent Nessie -now in shirt- Vick, Throbulator, Starky -un-pretzeled- and Tak, who had the scanner. Crystal had to stay behind to protect the Tallest and the rest of the group, and Dib, of course, had a head that attracted danger.

The quintet walked rather slowly towards the mountain, but they didn't want to get anywhere near it. It seemed to remember their past grievances, and moved over to the right, as if just challenging them to walk towards it. They neither accepted the challenge, nor paid much attention to it, as they examined everything around the surrounding perimeter of their camp-site. Nothing looked useful, so they continued on.

Tak, having the scanner, naturally was in front. Throbulator took some small, hand-made weapons and stayed to the right; Starky took a big, mace-looking in-sentient rock on a stick and stayed to the left; leaving Vick with the ropes and rocks-on-ropes, and Nessie with a "shock" blow-gun to the middle-rear. Of course, they usually became a line going through the tiny spaces between the foliage. And they all had bags and such to carry the things that they scavenged, along with some nets that someone had decided to make for everyone at some point.

Though Vick and Nessie thought about bringing some water with them somehow, it was finally decided that it wasn't worth the pain it was to make more bottles. Lasch-mik's bottle that held the "health-draught" she'd given Dib was finally deemed toxic waste, as was any of the stuff she'd used to make it. They tossed it outside the camp-site, and watched it scare away the other creatures... They also almost re-thought using it for their own protection... Then the Almighty Tallest moaned about more "stinky alien stuff", and that solved that issue. Coincidentally, every last drop of that stuff was devoured by the bugs posing as flies. They all avoided them, since, obviously, they weren't really bugs: and that creeped everyone out.

Not just the Irkens.

"Starky, do you have the pale-green mosses that I just handed you?" Asked Tak, looking in desperate hope to find something useful, quickly. The scanner still showed nothing of non-horrifying origin, and she'd stopped looking at it as she phrased her question. "Huh?"

"That-! Oh, right!" Starky pulled it out of his pocket, then handed it to her with a nervous grin.

"Even after I expressly told you NOT to put it into your pocket," replied Tak as she received it, glaring at him. "It'll still grow once it attaches to the insides of your pockets!"

"Oh, whose-what?!" Asked Starky in annoyance. That unusual alien colloquial phrase aside; "It's not like I'm not gonna' wash it!"

"That's not a good idea, you know;" Nessie held his finger up and added, "You know what happened with my coat!"

"Oh, well...uhh..." Starky seemed to have run out of ideas, and Throbulator decided to voice his opinion.

"We should keep moving: if we stay in the same place too long, we'll get eaten." He was being surprisingly-quiet at this point, and even held his hand out to point to a possible direction.

"No, I've got a better way -I know that no one wants to go there- but perhaps we could find something by the mountain?" Responded Tak as she scanned the moss. Internally, it held some possibilities, but that was impossible to get out -not without much more advanced lab-equipment- and so she simply sighed and tossed it out. "This stuff isn't going to work."

"Hey!" Exclaimed Starky suddenly, as she threw it away. He wanted to catch it, but it was already gone. And after he'd gone to all the trouble of carrying it. He humphed.

"We...really wanna' go toward that mountain...?" Asked Vick, nervously. Although she had all the tools she thought she'd need, she couldn't use them on a mountain!

"Then, in that case, we'd better get moving!" Replied Nessie, looking around at the surrounding jungle nervously.

"Wundebar!" Moaned Vick as they advanced towards it.

"Maybe if we pray, apologize, and then beg for mercy...?" Mumbled Throbulator.

"You're a Rough-rock Soldier; why would you do that?" Asked Tak as she led the way.

"*Sigh* Oh, I don't know, I mean, it is sentient...!" Mumbled Throbulator back at her, knowing full-well that she could just read his mind if she wanted. "That, and, we seem to have gotten on its bad-side the last time..."

Tak pouted and reconsidered his mumbled idea.

"Yeah, and it was Starky who caused it!" Replied Vick with a little giggle, remembering. Those of you who have been paying attention may remember what happened back in the first chapter. The rest... *Shakes head* In any event, Starky pouted at this.

"Hey, it's not like I had any way of knowing it was mountain's little rock-child!" He retorted, still pouting.

"Nyeah, well, we had a Mineralalien with us, so now it just seems silly," Commented Throbulator.

"I'd agree; only I didn't stop to consider sentient rock-beings, either." Tak stated simply, not turning to look back at them. "And that Soil-monster was really a surprise!"

"Yeah, heh!" Replied Vick, thinking back to the scrambled memory.

"That reminds me," started Nessie, but before he could ask his question, he was interrupted by Starky.

"We're here!" He held up his club to overlook the area; but it was empty.

The jungle explicitly ended and soon dropped off to a sheer cliff within a few feet. The unseen stuff which made the fire-spurts down below wasn't making any until they chanced to lean over it and look. There was no way to get across without making a giant leap, unlike the last time. And they'd have watch out for those flying blue blobs which had eaten the Soil-monster from the inside-out!

"The only thing to do now is to get the things needed for your cleaning things," Throbulator summed up.

Since the Irken method of cleaning involved using something like soap called "cleansing chalk" to scrape away the outer-layer of grime on their bodies, leaving a layer of antibacterial stuff behind, the likelihood of finding it around the mountain was higher. It was made generally by mixing together one or two, or a few different minerals into a bar-shape, which also was slightly abrasive. "Cleansing chalk" indeed. The newer varieties tended to have fun stuff, like foaming, super-cleansing, action! among other things. The most they could expect to find was at least two of the minerals needed, and that was obviously going to be where minerals usually are: in the rocks. A rather large mountain would suffice. Unfortunately, it was also rather ticked off.

"Right, well..." Started Tak. She was unsure which method to take to talk to it.

"We...should...start by apologizing to it?" Asked Vick, referencing Throbulator's idea.

"Hey, it's probably still mad at us," Agreed Agent Nessie.

"But, how can we speak with it?" Asked Starky, surprisingly intuitive.

"I never thought of that," Throbulator admitted. "HEY! Excuse us, sentient mountain-creature! WHAT LANGUAGE DO YOU SPEAK?!" He shouted this so loudly that it echoed off the walls of the cliffs below them and the jungle behind them.

"Oh, great! Now you've probably just made it mad again," Tak replied as she stared anxiously.

"Well, maybe it only speaks rock or mountain or soil-monster-speak," replied Vick suddenly, "Quick, Tak! Can't you use that UTSFIPM thing to translate it!?"

"I can't even hear it!" Tak admitted, still staring at the mountain.

"Maybe it uses a different frequency or method of communicating," Starky was still surprisingly intuitive.

"Well, can we see any other indication of communication since we've shouted?" Asked Agent Nessie, holding onto his blow-gun nervously.

"*Sigh* Where's Crystal when we need her?!" Replied Throbulator in annoyance. "Since she's got a crystalline structure, maybe she could do it?"

"Did she do it before?" Asked Vick.

"No, she didn't need to...!" Throbulator responded mysteriously.

"*Sigh* Well, since I can't sense it psychically, I'm trying to tune my sensors to try and pick up any other kind of signals, but it's not working." Tak looked up again at the mountain and got the very slight impression that it was getting annoyed. They had been standing in one place, staring up at it. She couldn't get her scanners to work, and she'd need more equipment to actually analyze it properly. Along with more scientists to study it. Where's Prisoner #777 when you need 'im?!

"Well, maybe we should wave?" Asked Throbulator. He'd been thinking back to their interactions with the mountain, and in no way had it made audible sounds; however, it did seem to move quite a bit.

"Of course! Maybe it communicates with movement!" Replied Agent Nessie excitedly.

"Well, that's about as good as anything I've got!" Vick replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Only one problem," replied Tak, holding up her scanner.

"The mountain might not understand us?" Asked Throbulator. Now he was being surprisingly intuitive.

"Ri-iiight, of course...!" Mumbled Starky. "Well how would we all apologize?" They looked around at each other for a minute. Then they unanimously decided to start their apologies, regardless of whether or not the mountain could understand them.

Vick and Nessie clasped their hands together in front of them and said, "We're sooo sorry!" Even bowing their heads a little.

Tak sighed and thought, 'I can't believe I'm about to do this,' before bending her head down until you couldn't see her face. She wiggled her antenna limply, apparently the Irken version of an apology.

"THROBULATOR! AND HIS GROUP WISH TO APOLOGIZE!" Throbulator just shouted.

Starky wiggled his hips about and made jazz-hands in the air. "Thii-iiis iiisss! The SORRY Dance! I'm -and the rest of my friends- are so SORRRYYY!"

The mountain, thankfully, moved and stopped them from making any more horrifying displays. It moved slightly to the left, and a hole opened in the side, probably a tunnel leading into it. The ground also shifted towards the cliffs surrounding it, making the gap between the crevice-canyon smaller, but not covering it entirely. That must've been to make room for the flame-spurts. After that, things quieted down a little bit.

"Well! That went well," stated Starky as he'd stopped dancing.

"Hooray!" "Yay"ed Vick.

"It looks like our apology has been accepted," Nessie added.

"Now let's never, ever do it again..." Moaned Tak, as Starky and Throbulator snickered appreciatively.

"Wait, will it even help us?" Asked Throbulator, "I mean, how would we even ask it?!"

And so their mad-communicating-pain began again.

They eventually found their way back to the camp-site, having made amends with their annoying and embarrassing antics, but came to find something equally-strange happening with the rest of them.

Dib was dancing weirdly, saying something, but eventually he sat down and let Crystal take the reigns. "Okay! And so, then-!" Crystal's dancing and saying was interrupted when the group entered the camp-site once more.

A dark bag-like-thing clunked onto the back of Dib's head, and he looked up when he heard someone say, "Hey, Big-head, what's with the shakin'?" It was Tak, as she walked by him and sat down a ways away. And the clunking thing which she'd now just dumped in his hands was a bottle.

"Hey, wait... Is this GLASS!?" He exclaimed, staring at it with renewed interest. It'd been wrapped in one of the nets with the dark, leather-like stuff that they'd used for the bags wrapped around the edges of it. It wasn't leathery enough to be used as clothes, but with netting it served much the same purpose.

The others in the group that had gone out to collect stuff were looking tired, but satisfied, as they showed off their stuff. "Thanks to Tak, we actually managed to get some bottles done!" Vick was saying, holding one in her hands as she spoke to Vrilly and the others. There were four of varying sizes, and although only one of them seemed to have come with a lid, the others could be covered up somehow, or so they were thinking.

"Tak made these things?!" Asked Dib with excitement, looking underneath the netting holding his.

"Don't take it out, and yeah!" Replied Vick easily.

"Well, more or less," added Agent Nessie.

"She made a mold carved out of in-sentient rock with lasers and then used a metal tube to blow air into a ball of glass while she held it inside the mold!" Explained Starky, "It was so cool! The glass inflated to the size and shape of the mold without losing any!"

"And, it hardly dripped," added Vick; even though she'd given Tak a hard time about it dripping a bit when she'd done it.

"I mean, I'd seen it done, like, with glass-blowers; but I didn't think it could be done while holding it inside of a mold!" Added Nessie.

"Of course, we had to break the molds to get them out, but it was so worth it!" Throbulator stated emphatically.

"That, and, we also found all the minerals and stuff that we needed!" Added Vick, "Including some more lye for soap-making, and some for Crystal!"

"That's not that impressive," added Tak as she walked by behind her, "It was the way we got it!"

"Whey?" Asked Dib, looking up.

"Yeah, it was definitely worth all that apologizing!" Nessie replied, giving the opposite meaning to her words than their original implication.

"Apologizing?" Asked Dib, ever-curious.

"Yes! Throbulator! suggested that we all apologize for upsetting the mountain!" Throbulator answered his question in the third-person. Although all of the uninvolved's eyes were on him, he still didn't elaborate.

"Yeah! *Laughs* Throbulator was hilarious!" Said Vick, "He shouted so loudly!"

"Well, you and Nessie looked like a couple of little kids!" Replied Throbulator easily.

"We thought that movement would be easier for the mountain to understand," Explained Starky to the confused ones behind Vick and Vrilly.

"*Laughs* I especially liked Starky's 'Dance of Apology'!" Laughed Nessie.

"We all had to humiliate ourselves," Tak replied sourly. It wasn't a thing she wanted to think about.

"But, well, at least it worked!" Replied Vrilly, hoping to cheer her up a little.

"Yes! Let's just hope that we won't have to do it again!" Replied Throbulator, stopping the cheer mid-lift.

"URrGHh!" Replied Tak, turning around to go "patrol" on the other side of the soil-monster's wall.

"Hey, wait a minute! Tak, come back here!" Tallest Purple shouted as she walked by. "We've got something to say to you!"

Tak sighed, then returned, face still contorting angrily. She shook her antenna at some unseen message, but didn't say anything. 'I'll tell you when I can find out,' she thought to them psychically, but refrained from giving any indication verbally.

The Tallest looked at each other, but they knew that she wouldn't use her psychic abilities on them unless it was a true emergency; there wasn't any reason not to trust her. "That's fine, then." Tallest Purple replied, and ended the conversation.

"What are you guys talking about?" Asked Dib as he looked up at their little communication. Tak just glared at him and sent him a thought about minding his own business, while the Tallest changed the subject.

"Hey, everyone! It's time to make some soooap for us!" Exclaimed Tallest Purple, startling everybody. They apparently had heard him...which wasn't hard, but they tried their best to ignore him, anyhow...they just didn't want to have to do it.

"We SAID, we want everyone to LOOK LIVELY NOW, and to help us MAKE OUR SOAP!" Stated Tallest Red, startling everyone into more attentive states.

"Like we helped you make yours!" Tallest Purple added, pointing over towards the three Earthlings.

"Yeah!" Tallest Red agreed.

"Alright~!" Replied Vick in annoyance. "But, what do we even do?!"

The two Tallest paused for a moment before someone answered the question. Tak was that someone.

"Don't worry, Sirs, I'll handle it." She stated, before turning to address the group.

"Hey! What about MY JOB, eh?!" Exclaimed Sploods, looking annoyed at her. "I'll direct the group as to how to make it -you'll just be the hands!"

"Yes, Sir," replied Tak with a bit of annoyance. She really didn't want to get on his bad side right at this moment, or at any moment...! After all, she had to use this soap, too, you know!

After a horribly-long amount of time Sploods spent organizing and explaining, the soap was finally complete, and everyone was exhausted from the process: the explosions, too.

"I..." stated Tak, "Am never gonna' look at soap-makers the same way again...!" She was leaning on the ground, breathing hard. The others were in very similar states, all with the exception of Tarky, who hadn't been too close to the explosions, and the Almighty Tallest, who were eating.

"Wow, thanks!" Replied Tallest Red, stuffing some more of those soft petal-looking things into his mouth.

"Yeah, we'repshoughphshrwrally owugh you one!" Tallest Purple also thanked them -with a full mouth.

"Whew! We can finally get rid of your stink!" Vick replied a little snarkily, just making them glare at her. They avoided fighting about it and instead stuck to making more snide remarks in retaliation.

"Well, after all of that, you two could use a little scrubbin'!" Tallest Purple remarked, staring her and Nessie down. Tallest Red took the things he was going to use for scrubbing and waited.

"What!?" Exclaimed Agent Nessie in annoyance. "Why's that, eh?!"

"That's because I wasn't working that pressurizer, runnin' it back and forth!" Replied Dib very simply. "I just didn't work up enough of a sweat."

Nessie glared at him, as if that was an affront, or perhaps he felt that he was betraying them. For the humans, being stinky and smelly went for all of them.

"Let's get goin' to that place Tak told us about -you know, the one with the dorp-seees doodles in the duddles?" Stated Sploods, who also was less sweaty because he'd been supervising and not exploded and everything. He pulled up a piece of cloth and said, "Tak, you can stand guard while we're over there; and I want Crystal there, with you!"

"Someone will have to stay here and guard the camp-site," Throbulator replied, "I guess that's going to be me!"

"Yeah..." there was a slight pause from Sploods and some silence. "That's why I didn't suggest you." There was even more silence and some un-cricket-chirping.

"Oh! Well, wha-uh, yeah..." Throbulator's confused response belied his feelings. That was embarrassing.

"Right! Then, uh... I'll see you later!" Replied Crystal awkwardly as she followed Tak out. The twin Tallests and their Advisor Sploods also followed them, whilest Tak waited for them before following behind.

"Finally! Whoo-whoo! I was wondering when we'd get some extra help!" Tallest Red's exclamation drifted on the wind as they faded into the jungle background -immediately. "You three can have the lift; we'll work on the scrubbin'-work!"

Those confusing words just added more to the confusion that would eventually follow.

Their cleansing-space just happened to be close enough, that some remarks would echo. This wouldn't have been as weird, if it weren't for the things that were said. "Hey, Purple-ohh'p, move over!" Came Tallest Purple's own voice; Tallest Red's was soon to follow.

"Can't you see he's still clam'perin'?!"

"That's not fair! It's getting right in my butt-point!" Tallest Purple whined, whilest he seemed to quiet down.

"Then, when the tophin-tantins?-" Tallest Purple's voice again was very echo-ey. Even Sploods' voice carried over.

"So, what?! What should I do with all this stuff?"

"Nyehuh, just jam it in there," Tak's voice was heard. "It won't budge 'er air."

"I can't! It's stuck!" Came Sploods' reply.

"Crystal, go do the outer-perimeter-ial." Tallest Red's commanding voice carried over, and she was probably saluting and saying, "Yes, Sir!", but they couldn't hear it. "Tak, you'll do the inner-perimeter-ial, but don't look too hard!"

"Yeah, we may need you!" Tallest Purple agreed. This just made things all the more awkward.

"Do...I...even WANNA' know what's happening?!" Asked Agent Nessie as the group listened with widened eyes and even wider ears to their echoing.

"No...we don't...!" Replied Vick morosely. She was getting used to the fact that most aliens had embarrassing things that they didn't wish to know, and this just made that all the more likely. "I think we should stop imagining."

"Gaz was right!... My imagination is a curse...!" Dib moaned.

"Heh hee heh, I'm so gonna' tease them whenever they get back!" Vrilly's reply made the two humans stop and think; their horrible imaginations had to slow to a halt before they finally understood what she was telling them.

"OOOoooOH! I am SO with you on that one!" Vick replied at length, shaking a fist.

After doing a sis-fist with her, they looked up at Dib, who still had an awful look on his face. "Too...much...! Imagination...!" He managed to get out, moaning. It looked like he was in pain.

"I CAN'T HELP IT! I'M TOO INTERESTED!" Suddenly he jumped up, screaming and grabbing his head.

"Oooohhh-kaaay, like that wasn't awkward..." Agent Nessie muttered, more to himself, but also trying to remind Dib that he hadn't wanted that whole, "psychic-link" thing mentioned... At the very least, he had to try to pretend that he cared enough to keep it a secret until Dib decided to tell them himself.

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT! IT'S STILL A CURSE!" Explained Dib, still in head-grabbing shout-mode.

A sound was heard to echo off the thick foliage...

"SO'S YOUR CURIOOOSITY!"

The Almighty Tallest turned to look at her. "What? In the heck are you talking about!?" Asked Sploods in annoyed confuzzlement. Strange, that.

"What? He's the one who shouted!" Replied Tak easily. "Fuzz-head's just not used to keeping his own mouth shut!"

"You're gonna' need to put something stronger than that tree-stuff on his mouth," Crystal mentioned from her place guarding the perimeter, glancing over just for a minute to look at Tak before turning back. She also seemed to think that Tak had done it.

"Hah hah HAH!" Stated Tak. "Seriously, I won't tell you who did that with the tree-bark; and no, we can't repeat it. He's too primed for another attack like that."

"Dib..." Started Vick, "Will you please just shut up and sit down?!" As she glared at him, Dib almost felt that he was under the watchful eye of one of his aunts or other female relatives; and he sat down, quieting, feeling odd about it.

The others smirked, but kept their thoughts to themselves. Clasps suddenly found something very interesting to see with the cuddly-little bugs in the leaf-litter that had scattered across the floor of their soil-monster's skeleton camp-site. Starky didn't seem interested at all, thinking about all the mold growing in his pockets, and Throbulator hummed quietly to himself. Vrilly had joined Clasps in observing the cuddly-bugs, as well as Agent Nessie's observance of the "cuddly-bug" right there in front of him. "Cuddly-bug", A.K.A. Dib, had to avert his eyes as he felt Nessie's intense gaze on him.

"Finally! Sheesh! What's gotten WITH you, today!? Can't you STOP ticking Tak-" Vick's final say was drowned out by yet another echoing comment, floating through the jungle.

"ExplOSIVE ROSES!" Came the sound of Crystal's voice, making even Throbulator, who wasn't drinking anything, do a spit-take. The laughter coming after that was, for some reason, also explosive.

"OH- Oh, my-!" Dib guffawed and grabbed his head. It just wasn't worth trying to hold it in any longer.

"THIS was worth ANY of that TROUBLE we went through BEFORE!" Vick laughed hysterically.

"I don't need to know!" Laughed Throbulator, "When Crystal gets back; I don't need to know what she was protecting them against~!"

"There's no more MOUSSERS!" Crystal's voice came floating over the foliage once more. They once again burst into giggles.

"That's not the right one," Sploods' voice carried some.

"Then let's get this done!" Tallest Red's voice carried over more. "And get it over with!"

There were a few moments of silence before they heard Tallest Purple's voice, "And with a SPOON!"

"Oh, don't be silly: he wouldn't have fit in one!" Tallest Red's reply sent them into a fit of giggles, "I mean, where's the pile of puckets?!"

"Whose short is shirts?" A while after the last one, Sploods' voice sent them into confused snickers, as they all tried to figure out what it had meant; and their imaginations were very...imaginative.

They returned to the camp, only to find every one of the awake group giggling and eyeing them with amused, suggestive eyes.

"Uhhm...is that what I think it i-" Tallest Red was cut off as Tak just shook her head with a sigh. Sploods looked disgusted and put-upon, whilest he rolled his eyes. Tallest Purple was also rolling his eyes, but just looked freaked out a bit.

"Yes, Sir, yes it is," Tak's reply as she held her head in her hand was all that was needed to inform them of what had happened. Well, that, and, Tallest Red.

"Oh, GREAT! *Mumble grumble* We weren't FAR enough!" Was what he surmised after a moment of contemplating.

The other Tallest, Purple, had figured it out long beforehand, and stated, "NO, DUH!" Before grabbing one of the small "towels" they'd woven from Sploods and wiping his hand with it. Then he proceeded to start rolling it up.

The others in the group had to stop giggling in order to flee with appropriate swiftness.

"Whell!" Came the sound of Vrilly's voice, "It looks like the Irkens are all cleaned up!" She'd taken to summarizing their situation once more, but no one seemed to mind it. That had originally been Ploopoh's job. No, wait, whose was it?

"Except for Tak!" Tallest Purple motioned, waving his towel around while he did it.

"Yes, I wasn't able to clean myself, I was too busy guarding them." Tak replied easily.

"Take yourself out there and do it, then!" Agent Nessie stated, wondering why she couldn't take care of herself. Tak glared at his apparent lack of concern; he didn't seem to get the "group" concept.

"Riiight!" Tak replied, taking some cleaning supplies to go clean herself. Crystal chimed in.

"Oh! Do you need anyone to help stand guard while you're at it?" She asked.

"*Sigh* Of course not: it'll make no sense for both of us to go," Tak replied, then stepped out into the jungle.

"Yeeesh," commented Vick when she was gone, "Why is she like that?!"

"Don't ask me," replied Agent Nessie, "Who knows?" He looked straight at Dib, staring at him as if he expected him to know the answer. Of course, he knew that wasn't so.

"THROBULATOR thinks it's something unimportant;" his reply was quite astonishing. "That, I mean, she probably doesn't want us to know." His voice trailed off quietly, almost like he hadn't wanted to mention it. Like it was disloyal to even say that.

"I dunno; she must be upset about something;" Crystal's only reply was a great comment on that point. And not so well-taken by the Tallest...who changed the subject.

"Hey..." came Purple's voice, "I think Tak left something here!"

"O-h-OH! Yeah!" Sploods agreed shortly after this. The Earthlings were still busy contemplating the previous conversation.

"That's not a good thack!" Nessie's comment was preceded by Dib's comments about how irritated she'd been before she left, and especially when they went time-traveling.

"You should know, you've been working together, right?" Vick asked.

"Well, heh," Dib had started, before Tallest Red got their attention. Tallest Purple held up something to get their attention.

"Hey! We need someone to take her a soap!" Tallest Red stated; too loud. "Who here wants to find out where she went?!"

"I, uh!" Started Vick, before she realized that she was woefully inadequate. "I volunteer someone else!" The others pouted.

"I don't know...but I bet Dib could find it!" Agent Nessie's grin spread to both sides of his mouth.

"I hate you so much right now," Dib mumbled, standing. "Alright: I'll go."

Vick had been looking at the Tallest, and realized what was going on...or so she thought. She gave them a quick wink.

"What? But,-" the looks Crystal was receiving from the Tallest told her to keep her mouth shut. Throbulator didn't even try it.

"Thanks!" The Tallest said, handing him the soap. He mumbled and walked into the jungle, the way Tak had gone.

"Ooohhh-kaaayyy..." Stated Nessie, somewhat hoping that he could see what effects this would have.

"Why did you send him out?" Asked Throbulator.

"Ohhh...you'll see...!" Tallest Purple snickered into his metal arm-protecting glove, fingers exposed and furled.

Dib stomped through the jungle, muttering about how Nessie had betrayed him and why in the heck he'd have to go out to give Tak some soap.

"Taaa-aaaak!?" He called, looking around. After a couple of seconds, he stumbled across the small clearing she'd found for herself. She hadn't gone far. This was hardly a minute away from the camp, but it wasn't easy to spot.

He blinked as he stared, completely shocked, at the sight before him. Then ran, screaming apologies the whole time.

"Aaarrrgeee!" Moaned Tak, fully cognizant of the Almighty Tallests' prank. "Of COURSE...! I'd have to deal with him...about THIS...!"

Before stalking off to try and round him up.

Meanwhile, at the camp-site...

The rest of the group were laughing their butts off.

"I-I can't believe you got him to-to-!" Vick laughed, contorting into a roll.

"I'd love to see that look on his face!" Nessie rolled around with laughter, equally-contorted.

"I-I know! I-I-!" Vrilly couldn't even finish her sentence as she also fell on the ground, laughing.

"Wha-hah!" Tallest Red's laugh was heard loud above the others', "We'll be able to taunt 'im with this for years to come!"

Back with the cleaners...

Tak grabbed Dib by the coat and dragged him back to the place where she'd been cleaning herself. He'd been running around in awkward circles, drawing all kinds of native flora and fauna's attention to himself. She'd finally caught up to him with the help of her spider-legs and a few lasers, and he'd continued running and screaming, despite the fact that his legs weren't even touching the ground anymore.

"DIIIB!" She finally shouted, both mentally and physically. Then, a little quietly, "Will you just SHUT-UP and LOOK AT ME!"

Dib had his arms over his eyes, still apologizing. He'd finally stopped at her shouting, then lowered his arms, carefully.

Her completely unclothed form was right in front of him, arms akimbo, staring at him. "There's NOTHING to SEE!" She stated, enunciating clearly.

"...Guh...!" Was all Dib could think to say. "..." There was even more silence as his mind tried to comprehend the facts. "..."

The plain facts were right there, for all to see. "There! You get it, now?!" Then she informed him mentally, 'There's no embarrassing organs for show! Those are hidden, and besides; I'm sterile!'

"...Wha?!..." Was all Dib could think to say. 'Huh-huh?!' His mind was also just as eloquent.

'The Tallest were just playing a trick on you! And, some of the others: you were duped!' Tak continued to him mentally, then sighed and crossed her arms at him. "Now, are we done?" The look on his face told her that they probably weren't, but she didn't care much. "And by the way, where's that soap the Tallest gave you?" Dib's face flopped around as he tried to figure that out.

"...Uohm...uh...ohmp..." He felt around his torso, "...Uhhm...oh, uhh...uhhhm!..." His hands were looking for something which his mind hadn't processed yet.

"I wanna' get back and hurry up to watch the group razz you," She stated as she turned around to find her cleaning things. Dib's face promptly met with the jungle floor.

Laughing about Dib's embarrassment wasn't half as fun as it was torturing him about it when they got back to camp.

END CHAPTER 7

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Not much to say about the rest of it, except for the fact that...I'm going to effectively embarrass these male characters, -including Tarky- even if it takes all day!

(And you have NO idea how hard it was embarrassing the Irken males when I'd already had my own "MY IZ Universe" idea that they wouldn't even care if they were naked in front of everyone. I just kept it a secret because I'd realized that it would reveal whether or not there's actually Tallest in their uniforms, and I also thought that that might be something the Irken government would want kept secret!) So, I finally settled on their embarrassment by the other aliens' imaginations! *Snickers* Poor, poor Tak! She's had to know it all! (Of course, she tried to block it out.)

As for Tak's cleaning scene, I'd originally planned to include it in PSYCH-OUT!, (a funny scene I'd had in my head for a long time, dunno if it was before the story or not, of Dib freaking out seeing Tak naked.) It was supposed to be set in Dib's house, and Tak was for some reason staying with them and had to clean herself in the upstairs bathroom. He freaks out and runs scream/apologizing into his room, where she comes in and finally reveals herself. It was funny and hilarious, but for some reason, no matter how much I finagled, I STILL couldn't get that situation to happen! I still wish I could've included it in PSYCH-OUT!, but I think it works well here, too.

Now, I think all that's left to say here, is...onwarrrrd, TO THE NEXT CHAPTER! ...That hasn't been written up yet, but I'm starting to!