Authors note: Check out my profile! I have a Youtube Channel about writing and on my profile, I added some stuff about this story.
Jonathan and I loved to annoy each other, especially since we were both radically different. It almost became our way of having fun, seeing each other out of our comfort zones. I would make him go to a raunchy rock opera and that next weekend when he picked our date, he'd take me a symposium on mental health. Even though he did this, I still looked forward to our dates.
Not long after we started dating, Jonathan started talking about fear and phobias. I am intensely claustrophobic and when my favorite singer came to town (whom Jonathan hated), he purposely bought tickets in the mosh pit section. I was excited to go but I like my personal space. The entire time he grilled me about how I felt and asked me to rate my anxiety on a scale of one to ten. It was quite easy to ignore him over the music and the gyrations of the crowd around us and I quickly forgot about it.
Then things started to get worrisome. We were at dinner one weekend at the end of our first college semester and I asked what he really wanted to do with his life, besides cure fear. He explained that he either wanted to teach abnormal psychology or work at Arkham, the city's mental hospital.
"Really Jonathan, how can you cure fear?" I asked, fighting to get all my spaghetti into my mouth.
"Subdue the chemicals that cause the feeling of fear." he said as though it were common knowledge. "Isn't your friend Austin on anti-anxiety meds?"
"Yeah, why?" I wondered why he was bring Austin into this.
"It's the same basic principle. Anxiety is a step below fear. I'm sure that if I could increase his dosage, he'd be fear free."
"Yeah, but once he stops taking his meds, he'd be free of his irrational anxieties, but still have fears. He'd have to pop pills all his life. He'd be a slave to a pill that is no bigger than his pinky nail and that is no way to live." I countered.
"Ahh, but that's when the surgery comes in. I would like to study the effects of removing the amygdalae, which is used in processing negative emotions such as fear and anger. The world would be a much better place." He said with a self assured grin on his face.
"You want to basically destroy a person's brain so that they won't be afraid anymore? What about natural fear instincts, like knowing not to touch a burning fire?"
"Well, I'm sure after two thousand or so years of evolution, the human race can differentiate what is dangerous and what is not."
"You're playing God, Jonathan. You may not like where you end up."
We ate in silence for the rest of the dinner. Silence always seemed to 'reboot' our moods and forget about whatever tiff we just had. Since it was almost Christmas, we decided we should go on a date that each of could enjoy. Much like Central Park, Gotham Park had horse drawn carriage rides and that was bearable for both of us.
Like a gentleman, he helped me in the carriage and gave me his jacket. I spread a blanket over us as he put his arm around me. I smiled and moved closer to him. The carriage took off.
"Oh, I have something for you." He said, reaching into his pocket and pulled out a rectangular velvet box. Excited, I unceremoniously pulled it from his hands and opened it. Inside was a was shiny, almost black, ornate gothic key necklace.
"Aww Jonathan! Is this the key to your heart?" I asked, giggling like a school girl.
He winced, "Don't make me say it…"
"How cliché! I love it!" Yes, it was cheesy, but I treasure it.
I know what you're all thinking, dear readers. "Is this the night Jonathan gets into her pants?" Yes, yes it was. However, the ending of my night didn't leave me focused on the sex. After the carriage ride, we went to his apartment for privacy, which was a rare luxury at my own. Jonathan was able to live on his own since his oncologist father paid his rent for him and other luxuries, like our concert tickets, so Jonathan could focus on school.
We went into his bedroom where we proceed to undress each other. It wasn't until afterwards, I noticed the scars. We laid naked, in each others arms, as our minds came back. I noticed there was a nine inch scar running down the length of his right arm. I thought it was a strange place to have a scar or be injured. There were others, too. They weren't grotesque or in large quantity, but enough to raise suspicion. Especially since they were in easy to hide areas.
"Jonathan, what happened?" I asked, tracing a scar on his elbow. He looked away from me.
"My father." Abruptly, he sat up, a stared straight in front of him. "He abused me, Addison and drove my mother to suicide. I've been away from him long enough that the bruises have healed." He looked me in the eyes once more. His own were crying, but full of furry. I was frightened. "I was always afraid of him. Fear is the first emotion I remember experiencing. He is why I want to cure fear, because I never want to experience it again."