Things Sterling learned the hard way
I. Don't talk about Sophie in front of Nate. Especially when Sophie is not in the room to save your life at the time of his visit.
II. Parker doesn't believe in "There is no way out of this situation."
III. Hardison doesn't understand the meaning of "you are under arrest."
IV. Eliot will not go quietly even if he is inches away from passing out because of blood loss.
V. Sophie cannot be caught! Unless you have already caught the others to begin with. If so, run for your life and pray that the drugs are something she hasn't been hit with before.
VI. Threatening the team is the only way to control Nate. Expecting him to be peaceful about it is a completely different story.
VII. The team is very protective of Maggie.
VIII. Never leave Tara in a room alone with Parker. Even you will want to save her.
IX. Nate's team of thieves do not like losing.
X. Helping them with their enemies is very beneficial to your career.
XI. They will be the best advisories you will ever have.
XII. If Nate asks you for help; Eliot, Parker and Hardison have all been taken by Damien Moreau and Maggie has drugged Sophie long enough for him to get away to ask you for help. Be very prepared for a lot of angry voices.
XIII. If Parker asks you for help, check your pulse before agreeing. You can't say no to Parker.
XIV. If Hardison and Eliot ask for your help without throwing a punch, you are not dreaming. It means that Sophie was kidnapped by your bastard of an ex-boss and they're to the point where they have asked you to save the man from their boss. Don't stand there and watch when you and Nate discover the grifter was shot and will spend the rest of the weekend bleeding out four times and flat-lining eight. He will not stop.
XV. Maggie is your greatest weapon in situations such as the previous one. She is the only one who can get through to Nate long enough to remind him what's going on.
XVI. Do not get in between Nate and Sophie when they are arguing even if it is for a con. You won't wake up to happy news.
XVII. Do not touch Parker, Hardison, and/or Eliot unless I have seen Nate and Sophie's dead bodies on the cold slab of a morgue. I don't like cleaning up their mess.
XVIII. Do not touch Nate or Sophie unless Parker, Hardison and Eliot are all confirmed dead by me because that is just not pretty. Even I won't clean up that mess.
XIX. Do not expect anything when it comes to that team. Every single one of them is very unpredictable when it comes to what they do. Don't attempt to kill any of them either.