Stuck With YOU
Chapter 7
By Mrs Padfoot
Disclaimer: Ha ha.
Author's Note: FANFICTION.NET BROKE! -wails- I don't know if this happened to EVERYONE, but it happened to both of us! That's why we haven't been updating. I don't know – was everybody having problems for the past few days or just some of us? Oh well. Some of you were asking about Lily/James action – Lily IS warming up to him, don't worry. I'm not going to give away the wonderful ending that my partner in crime wrote, but don't expect anything EXTREME.
**
"This is awful," said James.
"What is?" asked Lily.
"I – I can't think of a hiding place," he said sadly. "It's like my mind has gone – blank. It's devastating."
"I'm sure," said Lily, taking off up the stairs and (much to James's disappointment) removing her hand from his. "Well, I know where I'm going."
"Where?" asked James, scurrying to keep up with her.
"Somewhere you can't go," she said sweetly.
"Where?" asked James desperately.
"The bathroom," she told him.
"We've already hid in the bathroom," said James. "Remus was there, REMEMBER?"
"Oh," said Lily. "Not that bathroom. Just A bathroom."
"I'm not sure that's a good idea," said James, sighing. "I mean, LAST TIME we used a bathroom as a hiding spot, it didn't work out so well."
"Who said anything about using the bathroom as a hidey – hidING spot?"
"You did."
"Did not."
"Did too."
"Did not."
"Did too."
"I didn't!"
"Yes you –" but James was unable to finish his sentence, because at that moment, Lily rounded on him and furiously pinned him to the wall.
"I did NOT," she said.
"Okay, okay," he said. She released him and continued along the hall.
He took a look at her and sighed before following her as she continued. One second, he was sure he was getting SOMEWHERE with her, and the next she was a firey ball of fury.
"So," said James, when he had caught up with her, "if we're not HIDING in the bathroom, why are we going there?"
"Because," said Lily, "I have been in your company, hiding, running, and doing other generally insane things for the past seven hours. I need to go to the bathroom."
"Ohhh," said James. "I get it."
"Took you long enough," she muttered.
"I'll ignore that," said James. "But, may I ask, why you're going to some OTHER bathroom when there's a girl's bathroom right there?"
She glanced at the door he was pointing at.
"That's Moaning Myrtle's bathroom," said Lily, as if this were a perfectly logical explanation.
"I – WHAT?" asked James.
"It's a haunted bathroom," she said.
"So?" said James.
"So I'm not going in there," she said matter-of-factly.
"Why?" asked James.
"Because – it's – haunted," she said, as if speaking to a five-year-old.
"You're not SCARED, are you Evans?" he asked.
"No," she said, "I'm just not going in there."
"I knew it," he said, taunting, "YOU'RE just too SCARED to go in the bathroom because you're afraid of an ickle ghostie!"
"You have no idea how annoying that is, Potter," she said, rolling her eyes.
"I have a pretty good idea," he said, grinning. "But that's not the point. The point is, I find it GALLING that our Head Girl is afraid of a GHOST in the bathroom."
"I'm NOT afraid," she said sharply.
"Prove it," he dared her.
Any other time, any other day, she would have ignored him and walked on. But at this point, she was suffering from fatigue, hunger, thirst, a full bladder, and seven hours straight of Potter exposure.
She turned and walked straight over to the door, opened it, and walked in.
James grinned at his victory, walked to the door, and leaned against the wall, humming and twiddling his thumbs.
"She has to be here SOMEWHERE," said a voice.
James knew that voice. He stopped humming and tried to place it.
"Sirius said James was with her at this point –"
Peter.
James looked around frantically for a quick hiding place, and ended up dashing into the bathroom.
The girl's bathroom.
"Lily?" he asked.
"James? What are you doing in here?"
"Erm -"
"In case you haven't noticed, this is a GIRL'S bathroom."
"Well -"
"I don't think you should be in here," she said.
"I'm hiding," he said.
"WHY?"
"Because that's what we're DOING," he said. "For seven straight hours we have been doing nothing but hiding! Hide, hide, hide, and hide."
"Yes, but WHY are you hiding NOW? I thought you were waiting for me to finish outside!"
"I was," said James, "but I heard Peter."
"Pettigrew?"
"No, Peter Dumbledore," said James, rolling his eyes. "YES, Peter Pettigrew. He was looking for us."
"Him and the rest of the world," said Lily with a sigh.
"No," said James, "Remus and Professor McGonagall aren't looking for us anymore."
"You're right," said Lily, "apparently we have SANE people in this school. Imagine that."
"I never would have guessed," said James offhand.
The stall door squeaked open and Lily walked out.
"What now?" she asked.
"I – I guess we wait," he said, shrugging.
"For what? We don't know when he'll be gone!"
"I dunno," he said, "we just wait."
"Fine," she sighed.
"Maybe she's in the bathroom," said a voice outside the door.
James's eyes went wide.
"What now?" said Lily in a horrified whisper.
"The back stall," said James, "QUICK!"
Splashing water in their wake, the two of them dashed past all the other stalls and towards the last one, shutting the door as quietly as they could. Right on cue, the door squeaked open.
"I'm going to lever you upwards so you can see over the edge of the stall," James told Lily. "Tell me what you see."
He held out his hand, and she stepped on it, then onto his shoulders.
"It IS Peter – and a couple first years – recruits, I suppose," she sighed. Her eyes went wide.
"What is it?" asked James.
"They're checking the stalls for feet," said Lily, horrified.
"On the toilet, quick!" he whispered.
They clambered onto the toilet together, both attempting to stay on top without knocking the other off. It was VERY close quarters, standing on the same toilet, and James couldn't help but notice that –
"No one in here," said a squeaky-voiced first year, heading back towards Peter.
"You sure?" asked Peter.
"Yeah," said the first year, "we can't see anyone's feet."
"Feet?" asked Peter.
"Yeah," said the first year.
"James taught me this old trick once – stand on the toilet, and no one will see your feet," said Peter.
Lily glared at James.
"So we should probably open each door individually and check to see if they're standing on toilets," finished Peter.
"What do we do now?" Lily hissed at James.
"Uh," said James.
"You'd BETTER have an idea," said Lily. "Cause this is YOUR fault. If you hadn't TAUNTED me into coming in here, we would be at the OTHER girl's bathroom!"
"Well," said James, "we could always let them catch us – it IS sardines, after all."
Lily raised her eyebrows.
"Or we could climb onto the edge on TOP of the stall, then wait for them to exit the one next to us, and jump down into the stall next door at the last minute before they come look for us in here."
"Okay, let's do it," said Lily, climbing up towards the top of the stall.
"I was KIDDING," said James, watching as she climbed upwards.
Lily shrugged.
"Despite that, it was a good idea."
She was sitting on the edge of the stall above him, waiting for him, and watching Peter and his recruits check each stall.
James sighed and climbed up next to her.
Peter was already below them, looking around and down.
Luckily, he was not looking up.
He exited.
Lily jumped down quietly.
James wasn't sure he could be as graceful, so he aimed for the side of the toilet.
Lily snickered as he landed.
"No one here," said Peter, disappointed.
James grinned and moved to slip off the seat.
He slid.
Splash.
His left foot landed in the open toilet.
Lily glared at him.
James sighed.
"What was that?" asked Peter.
Lily's glare intensified immensely.
James gave her an innocent look.
She wasn't having any of it.
A sudden wail startled everyone.
"What was that?" mouthed Lily.
James shrugged.
A ghost came out of the toilet, glared at the two of them, and promptly burst into tears.
Peter's feet were resting outside the stall.
"Nobody likes Poor MYRTLE!" wailed the ghost. She flew through the door of the stall, towards Peter, wailing the whole way.
"Wh – what?" asked Pettigrew.
"YOU ALL HATE ME! WHO CARES ABOUT POOR MOANING, MOPING MYRTLE? BOYS – YOU'RE ALL SO AWFUL, WORSE THAN GIRLS, EVEN – FIRST RUINING MY LIFE AND THEN RUINING MY DEATH! WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME SO MUCH?"
Peter fled, first years scattering in his wake. The door slammed shut.
"Ugh," said James.
"What?" asked Lily. "We're safe now."
"Yes, but my foot's in the toilet. It's not exactly a pleasant sensation, you know."
Lily giggled.
James glared half-heartedly and removed his soggy foot.
They opened the stall door and came face to face with a furious, sobbing ghost.
"You – you – AWFUL – you STEPPED ON ME!"
"Er – sorry," said James.
Myrtle dove into the toilet behind them, sobbing like a maniac.
James looked at Lily.
"You could've warned me," he hissed at her.
"I did," she reminded him.
James, unfortunately, could not argue with that.
"Where to now?" she asked him.
"Why can't we just hide here?" he asked.
"Because," she informed him, "the toilet's overflowing."
"Right," said James.
"Lead the way, Mr. Potter," said Lily, gesturing to the door.
"Of course M'Lady," he said, taking her by the arm and exiting the bathroom.