Nick's Bad Seed, Jules' & Patrick's Pain

Hotel Lobby

Nick was finishing checking in yet another SWAT team. This had been the busiest this here fine hotel had been in ages. Too bad Sidney had taken sick. He did not relish workin' so much at his age but when there was a job to do he did it. He could not leave his grandson high and dry. He had raised that youngan since he was thirteen when his ma and pa had died.

He still missed his son Dwayne. He was a good man and that lady he married was the bee knees. Sidney made him proud too. He and his wife Bonnie had worked every day of their lives trying ta make a good life for their children. Bonnie had passed last year leaving the whole of the runin' of this here fine hotel to Sidney. It would've been nice if Bruce had bothered to help his father but the boy couldn't be bothered.

Nick thought that Sidney's girls turned out wonderful. Sweet as Lucy's cinnamon rolls. Both had moved away with their husbands. But that boy of his. Dang nab it that boy wasn right. Bruce had more than one screw loose.

That there boy was a bad one, the black sheep of the family. When that boy was in high school he overheard him a braggin' and a boastin' about immoral and downright sickin' things. Forcing himself on a poor girl. The way that boy talked made him sick. He would've turned the boy in but there wasn't no proof of what he'd done and he'd never heard the girl's name.

He was pleased as punch when Sidney told him Bruce had joined the Army. The Army would straighten him out he thought. It didn't. Ain't no enuf white wash that would clean that boy. Made him sick ta think Bruce could fool everyone around him. How'd he managed ta get hired as a copper was beyond his minds figuring. He wished the boy had never have come back.

Nick saw the group he checked in this mornin' comin' outta the elevators. The one with the painted nails came forward while the other three hung back chatting. When he stopped at the desk Nick noticed the nails were clear now. Must be puttin' on a show for all the other coppers.

Wordy smiled at the old coot. He and Spike told Greg and Ed about their encounter with the man. Ed and Greg told them about theirs and what happened with Jules and Sam. All four of them had a good laugh before they all took a short nap. They were headed out to get something to eat for lunch and wanted a close recommendation.

Nick asked "What'da ya need?"

Wordy asked "Are there any good places for lunch close by?"

Nick was about to answer when another man enter the hotel. He smiled. Now there was a good boy. So thoughtful and caring to come home ta take care of his ailing ma. Poor Mrs. Morgan. The Morgan's had lived next door to Sidney and Bonnie for ages. They had kids later in life and it was good ta see their kids steppin' up to help out.

How that boy ever was friends with Bruce he never knew. Steve must've wised up cause those two didn't much hang out with each other in high school when Bruce started really going downhill. He heard from from Sidney who heard from Bonnie that her boy was a paramedic in Toronto. That boy always did take care of others.

Steve walked into the hotel and saw Wordy at the desk with Old Nick as everyone called him. He grinned. There wasn't a more tough, crusty, judgmental or out spoken old man in town. He never held back what he thought. Old Nick loved to gossip and he got thing so wrong sometimes. But mostly he was harmless.

He wondered why he was manning the reception desk. Being in his late nineties or early hundreds, no one really knew exactly how old he was, he was still a heartily old man. Old Nick had one of the strongest work ethics he'd ever seen. He remembered as a kid Old Nick told him that not working was just downright dumb. The almighty had given him a strong back, two fine legs and good hands. That it would be wasteful and wrong not ta use what the lord had given him ta do useful work. That idle hands were the devils playthings.

Old Nick would probably live forever at this point Steve thought. The old man was to cantankerous to die. He recalled now that his mom has said that Bruce's mother had died last year. Maybe he was helping out Bruce's father with all the SWAT teams in town.

Steve trotted over and with a grin said "Wordy good to see you man. I just learned about the SWAT competition. I saw Team One was going to be part of it. I was just coming to see if they all had checked in yet. What are you doing here?"

Wordy couldn't help the chuckle that emitted thinking about checking in but said "Steve? Wow didn't expect to see anyone we knew here. Yeah we are all here. Sam and Jules checked in yesterday. The rest of us got here this morning. I'm covering for Raf."

"I heard he got a few broken ribs. Sorry Raf will miss out but I bet the rest of Team One is glad you are here" Steve said.

"Not half as glad as I am. Will be fun to work with them again. We were just heading out to get some lunch. Can you suggest any place?" Wordy asked.

Steve answered "Well there's always Adela's place"

Wordy said "We are meeting up with Jules and Sam later for dinner at Adela's. Any place else?"

Steve looked at Nick and asked "Is Frank's deli still open?"

Nick couldn't believe that Steve would associate with the likes of this man and answered "Yep." Then added "Your ma's not gonna like hearing you associate with such folks."

Steve looked confused and said "You mean police officers?"

Grousing Nick said "No ya youngan' I means immorals. alcoholics shacking up unmarried girls and playin' with toys with more guys, guys with guys with girly painted nails. You should be more careful whom ya are seen with. Gonna tarnish your reputation."

Still totally confused Steve looked at Wordy. He saw Wordy trying to hold back a laugh.

Spike had come up to them wondering what was taking so long. He was starving. He overheard and had no qualms telling it like it was. He looked to Steve and said with humor in his voice "Sam's an alcoholic Casanova and Jules is a Jezebel shacking up unmarried." He slung his arm over Wordy's shoulder "Me and Wordy are lovers and Ed has toys he wants Jules to play with. Oh and Sam can play with them too."

Stunned Steve stared at Spike "Geez what the hell happened?"

Spike laughed "If you want to join us for lunch I'll tell you all about it. By the way what are you doing here? They didn't send a paramedic to take care of us did they?"

Shaking his head no Steve responded "No they didn't but with the trouble that seems to find Team One that would have probably been a good idea. They would have sent Jim though and not me. He's the Sam specialist. I'm here helping my mom for a few weeks. I'll take you up on that offer for lunch."

The turning to Nick he said "Nick you have them all wrong. Team One are some of the best men and the best woman I know. All straight as arrows. You should remember Jules Callaghan. She dated Bruce in high school."

Nick looked at the men then back to Steve and his only comment was "Shackin' up unmarried is a sin." He turned and headed to the coffee pot to get another pot started for guests. He mused as he worked, Jules Callaghan, that name did seem familiar. Ah right Patrick and Kaitlin Callaghan's little girl. She was such a pretty little thing with a smile like a sunflower, all bright and sunny.

Steve said "Let's check out Frank's deli. It's close by I'll show you the way." The team and Steve headed out.

Nick made it back to the desk and checked in yet another team. He sat down in the chair he brought behind the desk for taking short spells of rest. He was nodding off when someone pounded incessantly on the little bell at the desk. Nick looked up and was displeased.

Without getting up Nick groused out "What'da want?"

Bruce looked at the crabby old man. He was always such a righteous, irritating old man that didn't know when to shut his mouth. "I need information Gramps."

Lifting his old bones from the chair Nick stared at Bruce "What kina information? You knows this here is a fine hotel. We don't be giving out information on our guests."

"It's police business. I'm in charge of the security for this competition. I need to know which rooms the gear is stored in. I need to assign men to guard the rooms" Bruce said.

He had been following Sam and Jules around since he saw them in the ice cream shop. This morning as he watched Jules interact with the two bald men he had figured out she was on one of the SWAT team. That rankled him. Then he saw Sam join them and realized they must be on the same team.

A little discrete investigation revealed that they were on Team One from the Toronto SRU. There were so many things that pissed him off. Jules was on an elite SWAT team. He thought she probably slept her way into the position. I mean hell there was no way she earned it. She was just a little woman.

Then there was Braddock. Not only did he ruin his chance at getting into Special Forces he was now on an elite SWAT team. And then he was marrying Jules. What about non-fraternization rules.

Bruce was a police officer, he knew teammates could not date. So Braddock was probably getting special treatment again. Just like when he was too young to try out for Special Forces but his daddy pulled some strings.

A plan had begun to form in his mind. He was going to make sure that Sam looked like an ass and was shown for the incompetent idiot it was. And maybe, just maybe he could eliminate him completely. But he needed access to the team's gear to make that happen.

He had already sat in on a security planning session with his Sergeant. He had gotten himself assigned as the lead on the security detail for the competition. He had an overview of the types of competitions that would be taking place. If he was lucky he could snag a set of the detailed plans that showed which teams were facing each other and the individual and head to head competitions.

Bruce had an idea how to get those plans. He knew the Commander in charge of the competition was having dinner with his Captain tonight. He would be able to slip into his room and get those plans. He just needed to know what room the Commander was in.

"Oh and I also need to know what room is assigned to each member of the competition and Commander Maddox" Bruce added.

Nick eye him warily "You be havin' a warrant for that information?"

"Gramps I don't need a warrant for that information. Like I told you. I'm head of security for the competition. These SWAT teams have some expensive and deadly gear. It is my job to see that it stays out of unwanted hands. Now give me the information or I come back there and get myself" Bruce ordered menacingly. This old man, even if he was his great grandfather was not going to stop him from getting what he wanted this time.

Old Nick thought bad seed. That boy was a really bad seed. He pulled up the records and printed them out. He handed them over and said "Ya better not be up ta no good ya hear me boy. I knows about ya. The devils in ya boy. How ya came in ta this family I reckon I'lls never figures out. Ya broughts enuf shame ta this family. We don't need no mor from the likes of ya."

Bruce sneered at him and said "Old man just die already."

He turned and strode out of the hotel. Bruce knew he'd have to be careful at the hotel now. The old man was ancient but he was a busy body and watched things like a hawk. He couldn't wait for him to die and his dad too. Then he would inherit this rat-trap of a hotel and he would sell it off and be rid of it forever.

Police Park

Sam was stretched out under the shade of trees. He and Jules had decided to have a picnic lunch in the park she was going to meet with Brayden in.

They had stopped at a local market and picked up food from the deli. They had picked up a cheap blanket so they could sit under the trees instead of a picnic table. Jules had insisted on getting several instant ice packs. He now had one over his knee.

Jules had her head on Sam's chest listening to his heart beat. His fall from the horse had scared her. But as usual Sam was tough and had even managed to keep David from harm. The swelling wasn't too bad but she insisted on the ice. Icing it now would prevent further swelling and would help his knee in the competition.

"So what type of scenarios do you think they might have Jules?" Sam asked and then took another bite of his sandwich.

Lean up on her elbows so she could see Sam's face she said "Spike's hoping for a bomb one. I heard him making plans to bring Babycakes."

Sam grinned "So Spike brought his girlfriend too."

Jules chuckled lightly "Or his toy. Wonder what the old man at the desk would say about that? I suppose we will all be given a similar scenario. Most likely some head to head drills. They tend to get creative with some competitions."

"Creative will be good. Me I'm looking to shine in negotiations" Sam joked.

Jules grinned "You'd win if it was okay to call the subjects jackass."

"Never gonna let that go are ya?" Sam said laughing.

Jules responded "Never. You were so frustrated with Lou. I thought you were gonna storm off and leave. Glad you didn't. Glad you stuck it out when we were being so awful to you."

Sam pulled Jules down to him and kissed her soundly. Then he said "So am I. I've got the best chosen family a man could ever have. You all have been there for me so many times."

Jules kissed him back softly and then said "Right back at you. You have been there for all of us too. And I agree we have the best chosen family ever."

She laid her head back on his chest and relaxed. They had another hour before Brayden would show up. She wondered how Brayden would behave.

Then she began to think about her father. Out of the blue she said "You know I used to think my dad hung the moon and stars just for me. He was so strong and I looked up to him. When we camped and he taught us to use guns he would tell us about his time as a cop. I was proud of him. I didn't understand why he reacted so badly when I told him I was joining the RCMP."

"From what I've learned from Aidan, Keagan and Finley those stories were told to us not to brag. He told those stories to us to warn us of the life of a cop. The problem though is I always saw the positive side of his stories. He saw all the death and devastation. All the ruined lives and heartbreak. I saw all the people he helped. All the lives he made better just be being there when someone needed him."

"I wanted to be like him. After my mom died things changed though. The man I knew as my father changed …" Jules trailed off in thought.

Sam said insightfully "Maybe like how Sara's death changed me?"

Jules popped her head up and looked into Sam's eyes. They locked eyes for a long time as Sam's words rolled around in her head. Jules allowed the possibility to sink in. Had she ever listened to her father when she told him of her decision? No. She had been headstrong and bucked when he objected. She never sought to understand why he objected. She assumed she knew why.

Sam brushed her hair back lightly "Maybe consider talking to him."

Jules broke eye contact and lowered her eyes then said painfully "Or actually listen to him and try to understand his position."

Pulling her closed Sam held her and lightly rubbed her back silently comforting Jules. He had seen the hurt and regret in her eyes and heard the pain in her voice. He understood the pain of reconnecting. Of looking at past events and seeing where you had misinterpreted something. Seeing the pain you caused others because you could not or would not listen. It was not an easy thing to do. Sometimes it hurt worse than physical pain and sucked all the air from your lungs.

He knew that kind of pain all too well. For six years he thought his father was doing everything in his power to kill him. If he had only once requested a meeting with his father to confront him all those years would not have been wasted. If once he had written a letter to his father asking why he kept being assigned to units when the others were down. If only once he had written to his mother and told her he never had a break. If only once as a child he could have cried in front of them and shared his pain.

But none of that had happened. It was a path that was never walked. It took an extraordinary event to bring him back to his family. And even then it was not easy going. It took work and they hit snags. Some he truly regretted like throwing his father to the ground in his study. But it was worth it in the end.

Sam knew he would be here for her to soothe Jules the best he could. But he also knew he could not take the pain away. That was something she had to work through on her own. He hoped that her father was willing to go through the pain with her and mend their relationship.

Callaghan Farm

Patrick finished making his sandwich and pouring a cup of coffee. Brayden had taken off for the afternoon. He was not forthcoming with where he was going. Brayden only gave him a vague answer that he had something important to do.

Bayleigh, Cyndi and Zed were out too. He liked that Brayden chose to live in the house with his family. One day all this would be his. He had moved back in after his divorce from Sheena when she got everything with his name on it including the house he bought. Patrick was glad Brayden chose to stay when he married Bayleigh. The house had been too quiet with all the kids grown and gone.

But with everyone out for the afternoon the house was quiet again. A quiet house was too painful. Every time it was quiet his mind would conjure up memories of the past. He longed for the days of laughter that filled the house when all the kids were young. Before Kaitlin got ill. Before Kaitlin died. Before he lost his little girl.

Patrick picked up his plate and coffee and headed into the den. He set them on the desk and sat down. He took a bite of his sandwich and then turned on the computer. Leaning back and looking around the room while it booted up, it was an ancient computer. Aidan was forever telling him he needed a new one but he figured why spend the money when this one worked just fine.

His eyes clouded as usual when he looked at all the pictures of his family on the wall. Family was important. But he lost sight of that so many years ago. He did something he had no idea how to fix. He deserved the pain that he felt almost every day because of his actions.

He took a sip of coffee and opened the site with community news. He read the weather report, several news stories and then came across the events section. His eyes scanned the article on the SWAT competition. It was taking place over the next week. The article listed the places that would be involved so locals could either come to watch or avoid the areas due to likely higher traffic and detours.

Patrick clicked the link that said 'see the five best SWAT teams in the country'. He perused through the first three teams from Vancouver, Winnipeg and Montreal. When Patrick came to the fourth team competing he almost dropped his coffee cup. Team One from Toronto. Setting down his cup with shaky hands he looked at the team photo.

His Jules. His precious wild child was going to be here. Patrick's hand shook as his index finger stroked her hair in the picture. He accessed a hidden password protected file on his computer. He had created it a two years ago wanting desperately to have his daughter back but not knowing how to go about it. He typed in his password 'ferocious'. He was alone and would not be disturbed for the afternoon. He could spend time with Jules.

He got the idea for creating the file when Aidan had scanned in all the old family photos several years ago. Patrick had pretended not to know too much about how to operate a computer but he had read several of Aidan's books and created this hidden file. He had taken the photos that Aidan had scanned and sorted out all of the ones with Jules in them and copied it to this file. Then he had searched for and read Toronto news sites looking for news of Jules and Team One activities. He copied all those and added them to the file too.

The news was infrequent but he found some. Like when she was awarded the Law Enforcement Professional of the Year. There was all the hubbub about a teammate being accused of assault and his subsequent exoneration. That man was impressive. The name had sounded familiar but he had difficulty placing it. There was that horrible mass shooting by the woman that was mad at the pharmaceutical company for giving her husband something that killed him.

But the two that broke his heart into millions of pieces were the ones were Jules nearly died. The photo that scared him the most was the one that someone had taken with a long-range lens of Jules hanging off the side of a mall holding a teenage girl. Jules had saved that girl's life that day the article had said. His heart clenched whenever he looked at that photo.

His heart shattered every time he read about her getting shot. There were no photos with that one. But he clearly recalled the call from her Sergeant. He was shamed by his reaction. Every wall he had built up to protect himself from pain walled him off completely that day.

He had been cold to the Sergeant. He never told the boys she was injured either. If he didn't acknowledge it then it didn't happen. But it had, no amount of ignoring the fact made it not reality and he was so ashamed he was not there for her then.

When he looked at the one of her accepting the Law Enforcement Professional of the Year award his heart swelled with pride. But it was his own damned pride that kept him from reaching out to her. He had made a series of horrible decisions.

He had lost Jules through his appalling actions. He had shut out his daughter because he was afraid to feel more pain. It was cowardly and despicable and he did not know how to own up to that.

It all started with Kaitlin's death. Her dying was nearly his death. When the melanoma cancer, her third, took her after she had successful fought the thyroid and breast cancer he was devastated. He could not feel more pain. He walled himself off from his five children emotionally.

He became distant, mean and authoritative. Without truly meaning to, Patrick place demands on his sons that should not have been their burdens. Jules was only thirteen when Kaitlin died. Her brothers took over the raising of her for the most part.

It was hard to look at Jules because every day she grew to look more and more like Kaitlin. Every time he looked at Jules he was reminded of what he had lost. His soul mate. He had lost the woman that was the better half of them. The woman that made him a better man. The woman he did not want to live without. And Jules reminded him every day of that.

When Jules was a seventeen he realized what he had done. He had pushed all his children away in his anger at cancer and grief at the loss of Kaitlin. He tried to mend fences but they were resistant. That made him push harder and demand they do as he said. It was wrong, so wrong. But the damage was done.

Then Jules told him after graduation that she was joining the RCMP. He had over reacted at the time. He had finally turned a corner where looking at Jules was a pleasant reminder and brought good memories of Kaitlin to mind. But her decision to join the police was about to take Jules away from him too.

All he could see was the young female officer dead on the plaza when the sniper was shooting that horrible day. So many dead and he could do nothing about it. He never wanted his kids to become cops. He told them stories of his time as an officer to warn them away from the life. It was a painful kind of life so fraught with danger.

How his only daughter could choose that kind of life? For years he thought it was to spite him. To pay him back for the years of neglect and harshness after her mother died. He had demanded that she not join. When that didn't work he gave her an ultimatum. Choose between the family or being a cop.

When she walked out saying that she could make a difference being a cop his heart had imploded. How could she hurt him this way? Did she not hear what he had told her about the life of a cop? Did she not know he could not live if he lost her?

Jules had been so headstrong he should have seen what her reaction would be. Telling that girl she could not do something was like waving a red flag in front of a bull. It was a challenge. She never backed down from a challenge. Much like him.

Patrick looked at the team photo. Jules was beautiful and still delicate looking. But in her eyes he saw strength and fire. She was the mix of him and Kaitlin. Jules had his strength and hardheadedness and Kaitlin's soft beauty. He looked up at the wall of a picture of the family when Kaitlin was about Jules age now. They were so alike, so very alike.

He missed them both so much. Turning to the picture of Kaitlin on his desk he said aloud "Katie dear what should I do? Please help me. Help me find a way to atone for my errors. Please help me. I want my wild child back."

Hearing the door open Patrick quickly closed the file. In his haste he knocked over the coffee cup and the contents spilled onto the computer. He watched in shocked silence as the computer seized and then died.

Aidan called out "Dad you here?"

Patrick answered "In the den."

Aidan came in and saw his father staring at the ancient computer. He asked "Did it finally give up the ghost?"

Patrick could only think of all the pictures he had lost of Jules. His file was gone now just like his Jules. He looked up at Aidan and covered his emotions. Men did not share emotions and said "Well a cup of coffee done killed it."

Coming further into the room and around the desk Aidan looked at the computer "Yep its's dead. If you want I might be able to retrieve your files from the hard drive and transfer them onto a new computer for you."

"You can do that?" Patrick asked. Maybe there was hope he didn't lose his Jules file.

Nodding Aidan answered "I can certainly try. I know Brayden keeps all the farm files and finances on there. I have some time this afternoon. How about we go to the computer store and I show you what's out there and you can decide what you want."

Patrick agreed. He would need to get a new computer quickly. Brayden would not like to be without his files for long. As the two headed out he grabbed his sandwich and asked "What brought you by today Aidan."

Aidan answered "I wanted to grab that old photo album. The one Bayleigh found in the attic. I thought I'd scan in those photos too."

"I'll get it for you when we get back. I like having all those photos on the computer. Maybe I've get one of those memory card thingys for that digital photo frame you gave me for Christmas. We could finally set that up too" Patrick said.

Bringing dad into the twenty first century was slow going but he was making progress. Aidan smiled "Sure we can do that."

Aidan fought hard not to tell his dad that Jules was in town and that she was engaged. He so wanted too but he had promised Jules not to say anything to any of the family until after she met with each of the brothers. In fact it was because she was here that he wanted that old photo album. He had flipped through it several months ago when Bayleigh found it.

It contained photos from the last family camping trip. Their week in Réserve Faunique Ashuapmushuan was full of fond memories. It was the last time Mom was healthy enough to come camping with them. Sure they had camped after that but it was never quite as good as that trip with all of them. He thought Jules might like to have a copy of those photos along with the other ones he was making for her.