The Hellsing Files

by ToMakeMeTame

There's nothing better than watching your favorite Hellsing characters be bruised and abused- especially at the hands of their co-workers. Watch as Alucard films the madness from behind a conveniently placed rock... and narrowly dodges a silver ashtray.

7. Hat

The Hellsing Files

-Hat

Why doesn't his hat ever come off? Pip wondered, watching Alucard walk on the ceiling to Integra's office. He sat there, pondering this for a while. Suddenly, a voice snapped him back to reality.

"...Why are you staring at the ceiling?" asked a certain draculina.

"Oh, h-hi, Seras," he stuttered. "I'm trying to figure out why Alucard's hat never comes off. Does he glue it or something?"

"Oh, Master's hat? No he doesn't glue it, but I've only ever seen it off a couple times."

Pip grinned. "Let's get it."

Seras agreed wholeheartedly.

xXx

The next time Seras and Pip saw the Nosferatu, they launched into their plan. Waiting until he had passed, Pip leaped onto his back, pulling and tugging on his hat. It didn't come off.

Alucard growled, backhanded the hapless mercenary, and Pip flew back into a wall several meters back. "Don't. Touch. My. Hat," he growled, glaring at the pair with his I'm-gonna-kill-you look.

They shrunk back some feet, and Alucard continued on his merry way.

(157)

Moral- Don't touch Alucard's hat. He is the ONLY ONE allowed to touch it.