Numb
A House MD Fanfic
Rating: T
Warnings: Slash, Sick Child, Spoilers, AU? Season 4 never happened, Foreman, Cameron, and Chase are still working for House
Pairings: House/Wilson, Chase/Cameron, others may follow
Disclaimer: I do not now nor will I ever own the wondrous possession known as House. It belongs to whomever it belongs to. I do not own the New York Times. I do own Dakota, Jorge, Haruhi, Nurse Walters, Mr. Haddox, Grandma Rayne, Auntie Myra, and Alice. I also own this plot. I don't own Bohemian Rhapsody. I don't own Smithsonian Magazine or its articles.
Author's Note: Wow, I'm so wiped, I feel like a kitchen counter. I just spent the last two sleepless days at my friend CCJJ's house watching her set of Gilligan's Island dvds. They didn't have any vegetarian food, so I lived on bad coffee and two strawberry marshmellows we found. But lordie, did I ever have a jolly good time. I don't have TV, so I loved every exhausted second of it. We also watched some of the Jackson Memorial, wowzers. Poor kids, I thought Prince Michael the First wanted to say something when they were onstage, but the family pushed Paris forward. And now, she's all over the news, not what MJ wanted.
Thanks for my reviewers, Micetea (totally agree, but it's a necessary plot device), Harpyquin (suh-weet name), Foolish Mortal (thank you so much, I really hate using pronouns with slash couples, it s all he did this to him, and confusing. I tried to work on it in this chapter), Kaname Natsumi, BertieTiger (honestly, so did I), and Houkanno Yuuhou.
Phobias! (my two guessers were correct, Pteronophobia is the fear of being tickled by feathers)
Allodoxaphobia - fear of opinions (my dad used to joke Sarah Palin had this)
Menophobia - fear of menopause
What is Phagophobia? (love the name)
Numb
Chapter Six
Chase sighed in relief as he saw there was just enough blood left from Dakota's last sample to do the CRP and ESR tests without drawing more. The girl was feeling bad enough (and fairly disgusted) now that she knew the facts of life. Foreman and Cameron stayed in her room and were waiting for Mr. Rayne to return. Grandma Rayne had had a bingo game, but Auntie Myra had stopped in to cover for her. She promptly went to the window and despite protests, lit up her cigarette, barely noticing the ill child in the bed. Cameron's lips got thin and her brow furrowed when she saw this behavior. Dakota didn't even seem to care and kept her gaze on her kneecaps.
Meanwhile, Wilson finished his paperwork (finally) and carefully avoided House on his way up to Dr. Cuddy's office. Checking to make sure she was alone, he slid in and threw himself face first on her couch. She didn't even blink and continued signing off papers.
"It happened again, Lisa." Of course, this mumbled statement into the cushions came out more like "Hft kpnmed eggianlizzars."
"Wonderful." She had no clue what he had said, so she gave him a weird look, shook her head, and kept on signing off. The limp figure on her sofa lazily raised his face, stopping his own attempts to commit suicide via suffocation.
"I said 'It happened again.'"
"Didn't sound like it."
"I just don't know what to do. I- I freeze, it's those eyes." Wilson grasped at his hair with shaking fingers, sinking back into the pillows.
"Oh, man up, you've been best friends since college. The only thing that's changed is the depth of your feelings and his hairline."
"Hey!" His head popped back up from the couch. Cuddy sighed, and put down her pen.
"What happened, James?"
"Well, he barged into my office again and told me he needed me to pay for his lunch, and I had to decline due to my paperwork," his boss gave an approving nod at this, "and next thing I know he's leaning close to me and whispering in my ear. I froze, again, and then he- then he-"
"He what?"
"He stole my wallet."
Cuddy's face met her palm with a satisfying smack. Wilson's face met the cushions and stayed.
"And you let this happen?"
"I couldn't say no."
"Then stop complaining." Cuddy slammed her palms on her desk, causing a small, paper avalance to occur. "You come in here almost everyday moaning about how House takes advantage of your little 'man crush', so either learn to say no, or tell him the truth!"
"I can't!" Aghast, he leapt from the couch.
"You can, too."
"Do you know how hard it was to become friends? House trusts me, and I can't tell him, I can't break that trust."
"But you can break yourself, have you looked in a mirror lately? You have bags under your eyes, you're paler than a ghost, and your hair's a mess. Have you even slept recently?"
"Of course I've slept! But all I see are those eyes and I have to wake up."
"It'll only get worse until you tell him or you kill yourself with this stupid secrecy."
Wilson sighed, running his hand through his hair. "Oh god, I'm going to be living with him for the week."
"The whole pest control deal?"
"Yeah. How am I going to survive this, Lisa?"
"Tell him, so you can get this off your chest. If he kicks you out, you can stay with me."
"Thanks, but no thanks."
"Then get out of my office, I have a feeling a certain blue-eyed diagnostician is looking for you."
"What gives you that idea?"
"The fact that he's walking this way. He must really love you if he's willing to brave my fury to see you."
"You--"
"Am I interrupting something?" House cut in, leaning against the office door.
"Not at all." Wilson licked his lips and sat back down.
"Yes, and you should be in the clinic right now. Don't think I didn't hear about you telling the patients about that Christmas party where Wilson--"
"Lisa!"
"Fine, but still, an extra two hours, House."
He gave a dramatic sigh, "The horror!"
"Now, take Wilson and get out. And get him something to eat, I think he's been ignoring food."
"I have no--"
"Righty-oh, then." interrupted House, grabbing his friend's elbow and 'carefully' dragging him out the door. The pair made their way to the cafeteria, House grabbing an apple as Wilson chose a salad and a brownie. They reached the cashier, and Wilson reached automatically into his pocket to pay.
"You still have my wallet!" His friend shrugged, pulling the possession in question from his jacket and forking over the cash. He continued to their usual place, Wilson in tow with their food, and set the wallet on the table. Snatching it up, the younger doctor replaced it in his pocket and sat down with him.
"So, I'll bring my stuff over tonight?"
"Hmm?"
"My stuff, I'll bring it to your apartment tonight."
"As you will." He mock-saluted, before bringing his apple to his mouth and taking a crunchy bite. He didn't fail to notice Wilson's eyes following the apple's path and lingering on his lips. He smirked from behind the fruit.
"Thanks... again."
"What kind of awful person would I be if I let my best friend sleep on the streets?"
The friend in question rolled his eyes, chuckling as he dug into his salad. The brownie lay in the corner of the tray, begging to be stolen (even if he had polished off a sandwich and fries only an hour ago, and was eating an apple now). He reached out, plucking it with ease from the tray.
"House!"
"My brownie now, finders, keepers." Wilson reached for the sweet from across the table and missed. "Losers, weepers."
"House, I was going to eat that."
"I know, but I think you got this with me in mind. You don't like walnuts."
"Ah--" Wilson blushed, not realising how cute he looked with his nose scrunched up in indignation. House unwrapped the dessert and took a bite.
"Yummy."
"Alright, so I did get it for you, but still..." House shrugged, then closed his eyes and grabbed a napkin, spitting the half-chewed brownie into it.
"Yuck."
"What's wrong with it?"
"It's half-cooked, still runny."
"It didn't look undercooked."
"Well, it is." He thrust the brownie back onto the tray in disgust. Wilson looked down at his salad, shook his head, and pushed the tray away. He'd eat later.
"Well, this lunch sucked."
"Linner." he gave Wilson a weird look at this statement, "Linner, the meal between lunch and dinner. It's three o'clock."
"As fascinating as that is, I have an apple to devour." He returned to his fruit with vigor, savoring the flavor. His smirk returned when he saw his friend was once again focused on his lips. "Am I that sexy?"
"What?" He was greeted by a blank look as Wilson came out of his daze.
"Am I that sexy? You keep staring at me."
"I do not."
"You do so."
"I do not, House, you're being ridiculous. Even for you."
"Does Jimmy have a man-crush on little ol' me?"
He was rewarded with another blush, "Shut up, House."
"Well? Is there a better topic of conversation than me?"
"Yes, there is. Why, I was just reading in Smithsonian about a breakthough in oncology. They think they've discovered the genes for supressing cancer; they're called microRNAs, it's fantastic news--"
"That will put you out of business." House interrupted,
"I can find a new field to work in. I bet the radiologists are hiring. Or maybe the--"
"Gynocologists?"
"Shut up, as I was saying, I can work elsewhere. Maybe I can be a cafeteria worker, so they won't undercook their brownies."
"Yeah, they'll burn 'em instead."
"Or I can be the sexy janitor, like on TV. Have all the girls clamoring for--"
"A carpet rinse?" House gave a lewd grin to his friend, "Maybe I should be a janitor."
"House, is that all you think about?"
"Janitors? Nope. Sometimes I think of maids, gardeners, and even lifeguards on occaison." Wilson shook his head, standing up and taking the tray with him. "Aren't you going to eat your salad?"
"I don't think so, I'm not hungry."
"Jimmy, you're skin and bones. You need to eat something."
"I'm not hungry, House. Want me to take your apple core, too?" The core hit the tray with a dull clunk, and he walked away, throwing the nearly uneaten food in the rubbish bin and placing the tray on the rack. He didn't see the look of concern House shot at his back, as it dissappeared when he turned around and returned to the table.
"Let's go to my office, it's time for Prescription: Passion."
"Okay, House."
Author's Note: Nothing medically relevant this chapter, but I promise some soon. Hope I wasn't too ooc with the characters.