Emma

Emma Swan knew she was not ready for this. Not ready to wield a sword, not ready to fight sirens, or freaking sailors who were controlled by them, not ready for all that. Heck, less than a year ago she thought fairytales were all made up, and now... Now she felt like the crazy things were never going to stop piling up and she'd never have time to stop and catch her breath.

Because no, she was not ready to fight. She didn't know how to, she'd never done anything like this before, and honestly? She was freaking scared. The three sailors opposite her had burning, golden eyes, and though their faces were emotionless, they were scary as shit nevertheless. Emma felt her panic taking over her otherwise clumsy movements. She was unfocused and glancing over to David, she realized she should be doing something like that. She should pull herself together. But she was not ready for this.

Emma dodged a sword, catching a brief break as she quickly turned her back on the sailors, and that was when she saw them.

Mary Margaret and Regina stood at the edge of the forest, watching her and David fight. So, Regina was holding up her end of the plan. Good. Seeing her mother, Emma wasn't really surprised, she knew the brunette would come. Even from that distance, Emma could feel her mother's worried look on herself, and somehow it felt good. Like a small breeze on a hot day.

The Queen next to her seemed less afraid and her face showed a different emotion - doubt. So, she doubted Emma was ready for this? Did she think Emma was weak?

Yes, Emma knew she was not ready for the craziness she was living, but right now, her pride set her insides on fire. She felt the adrenaline in her veins again, as it flowed through her body, she felt the power returning to her.

No, she would not let Mary Margaret get hurt. She was her best friend, her mother. She had stopped labeling people a long time ago (it was goddamn chaos and her head started hurting every time she tried to think about these things), but no matter what she called her, that woman was someone the blonde truly cared for and she would do anything to protect her. Even if Emma was not the mother in their relationship, she had often felt this urge to stand in front of the cursed Mary Margaret and shield her. That had not changed, but now she finally understood where this feeling came from. She was one of the most important people in her life and Emma steeled herself as she decided she would not let her in harm's way.

And no, she would not let Regina be right about her. They had shared the same doubt; Emma had been unsure, until the moment she saw it mirrored in the ex-mayor's eyes. It called out the stubbornness in Emma, and so she decided she would show Regina that the doubt in her eyes was wrong. Maybe she wasn't ready for this, but she would sure as hell fight as long as she could.

The moment passed and she kept fighting on. From the corner of her eye, she saw the two dark figures move in the forest in the direction of the enormous cliff. But Emma forced herself to concentrate, she had to focus on what she was doing.

The sounds around her were raw; steel collided with steel, grunts and heavy steps on the solid ground mixed into one, big mass of noises. She started sweating heavily and her arms ached, not wanting to hold the ponderous sword in her hand any longer. Her vision became diffused, having spun around a lot to avoid the crushing blades. She took in a deep breath after she managed to get a little farther away from those chasing her. How long would she be able to keep this up?

Minutes passed and she became less and less focused. A thought ran through her mind - this rescue mission had been a very, very bad idea. They hadn't thought through anything, they had been unprepared and now they were losing. They were nothing but a bunch of idiots, scurrying around without any idea what they were doing. Emma had a bad feeling that it wouldn't end well.

Suddenly, a high-pitched noise assailed her ears. She turned and saw Mary Margaret and Regina running towards them with swords in their hands. A shadow of a smile passed over Emma's face. So, they did manage to free Hook? Good. But she narrowed her eyes. If they rescued him, where was he? And why was her mother's face in such shock?

In a second, she figured out why. Emma felt a sharp pain in her right limb; turning, she saw a rusty blade protruding from it. Apparently one of her opponents had taken advantage of her momentary distraction and surprised Emma. She moved a foot away and with a quick fling she kicked the sword out of the sailor's hand. Everything became a bit blurry, but the pain was bearable. The man rushed away, leaving Emma a moment to fall on one knee and let out a short hiss.

"EMMA!" She heard a desperate voice shouting her name. She turned her head to say that she was fine, that it was okay. She knew how freaked out Mary Margaret would be and she needed to let her know that she was fine. But when she moved her eyes in the two women's direction, the blood froze in her veins. Half-standing there, leaning on her sword, she felt the universe stop. Stop and stare, because what her eyes saw was something she could not grasp.

Mary Margaret stood still, though her body suggested she was about to start running. But she wasn't running, she wasn't moving, her eyes widened in a kind of uncomprehending terror. A small sigh escaped her mouth before she looked down and saw a time-worn sword's end coming out from somewhere around her stomach.

Emma became numb. She barely noticed Regina as she stabbed the sailor and pulled the sword out of the brunette.

This was not happening. She was not ready for this. She could not lose her mother, she'd just gotten her back after almost thirty years. There had been no doubt in Emma that now was the time for them to be together, to be a family. There had been no doubt that no matter how difficult the situation was, they would get out of it, like they always had. She had had no doubt. And now, staring at the bloody figure of her mother an enormous doubt came over Emma, and slapped her, along with all of her hopes, in the face. Who was she kidding? They would never have the chance to be a family. This whole madness would never let them. This madness. The magic.

Maybe it was the realization, or the hopelessness she felt, or the denial, because it was all too painful to look at, but she didn't really care. She felt the force, and she let it out. She let it flow through her. The air trembled around her and the sand flew around her as if wind was blowing. Emma's whole body became numb, so she didn't notice the tears that streamed down her face or that she was slightly shaking. She stared at the ground, but did not see anything. She was not thinking anything. This was not happening.

When our life is in danger our nervous system uses a very interesting defense mechanism. It sharpens our senses and we stop thinking about the consequences our actions might cause; the only thing that stays in our focus is the thing threatening us. Or body responds in one of two, very different ways. We either run away, or we attack. There's a term for this instinct, it's called fight or flight response. And the moment before our body decides which way to go, before we face our demons or turn our back on them and run like hell; that moment we experience a state of weightlessness. It's like being tossed into the air, right before gravity pulls us back towards the earth - that one moment is the last one, before our eyes become blinded by the very instinct of survival. That one moment is perfectly clear.

Now came this moment of peace. Fight or flight. All her life, Emma had run when this instinct kicked in. Why fight? They were people she didn't care about, because they didn't care about her either. It was easy - turn around and run. No responsibility, no anchors, just herself.

But now? Now a force greater than her own self pulled her in the other direction. She didn't even have a chance to decide. Her body moved to attack without a second thought.

She launched herself at the one remaining sailor she had been fighting and grabbed him at his throat. She raised the man from the ground with the sudden power that filled her body, squeezing the life out of him. Her face was deformed by the hateful snarl on it. Suddenly, she felt a soft hand touch her shoulder from behind. She threw the man away and with a stern look, tear-worn face and trembling body she turned.

But it only got worse, the pain she felt inside. She couldn't really understand what was going on, but it was one of the sirens. She touched her, and it made Emma stop. Strange thoughts raised in her mind. The horror she felt got blinded by them and no matter what she did, they kept coming. It didn't make sense.

Why was I abandoned? Why didn't my parents go with me through the wardrobe? Why did they leave me alone? Why did they dump me on the side of a freeway?

No, wait. I already know these things - I was not abandoned, I was saved. And they couldn't go through, because August-

Pinocchio could go through, so then why didn't my mother do it for me? Why hadn't she-

No, stop it! She didn't know! If she did-

...and when she realized, when Geppetto told her, what did she do? Slapped him? That was it? That was all I'm worth?

STOP IT!

Emma felt the hand releasing her, but without it she could not stand any longer. Her magic stopped flowing through her, and a feeling of weakness replaced it. The wind stopped, the colors became too vivid and everything started dancing around her, so she closed her eyes. She felt sick.

My mistress would never abandon me like that. She would take care of me, if I serve her she will protect me.

They are sirens! They are the enemy! I have to get out of here, I have to get everyone out of here!

Why would I ever leave this place? What's out there that's better than this? A screwed up family, people who pretend they care for me, but when it comes down to it, I'm always second choice? I'm always left behind, they all leave me, saying it's for the greater good. I'm always expected to save everyone, but nobody is going to save me, are they? No one cares about my happy ending. So, why leave?

They are my family!

They are nothing but a weakness. A burden. I'm better off without them.

I need them! And they need me too!

All they needed me for was to break the curse!

But-

She was getting weaker. Emma felt her willpower leaving her body, as these strange thoughts poisoned her mind. She wanted to shake her head and get them out of her head, but they stuck like glue.

"Emma!" She heard from what felt like a light year away. "Emma, honey, look at me! Please, open your eyes! Emma!" But she couldn't.

"Miss Swan, now is not the best time for this," she heard another voice. "Get up and get going!"

"Sweetheart, you have to get up. You have to-"

"Do not call me that," Emma heard a third person. But no, wait, was it her voice? "You lost that right twenty-nine years ago. You don't get to call me that."

"Oh dear," the other woman spoke again, but it was like Emma was underwater, she could barely hear it. "This is what I was afraid of."

Through the numbness, Emma felt the air tensing around her again. What was she doing? But she couldn't think straight. Suddenly, this wave of hatred swarmed her, suppressing the last bit of free will inside her.

Emma knew she was not ready for this. And as it turned out, she was right.

Sorry for the late update! I'm on vacation currently and I barely have time to write. I have plenty of ideas, but I'm always going somewhere so it's difficult to just sit down and write them down. But I'm trying my best:)

So, this chapter was fully about Emma. It will be essential for the storyline and I had a few ideas about her character anyway, so I thought I'd put them into this story. For example: Mary Margaret slapping Geppetto. I don't know, have you guys read Believing in Henry, by Shopowner93? Because THAT would be something Snow wound do in my opinion. And also, I'm really hoping that someone will notice next season how everyone's - seriously, everyone's - happy ending is more important than Emma's. Yes, she's the savoir, but please, she needs a happy ending too! She deserves it.

I kind of left things open, but I'll try to write more asap! Reviews are always mean the world to me:)