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Enjoy the chap! (yeah, I know...strange name for a chapter)
Chapter 7- Fat, ugly and Stupid
And finally, add Rosemary roots to the boiling cauldron; this final step is of high importance to the complete preparation of the potion. Do not scramble, just add them, and the lilac will turn a powerful red.
"That's it, I'm done" Remus said tiredly to the empty room yawning and stretching.
His back ached and his long light-brown hair was slipping from the string that made his ponytail. That essay had taken a lot of time to write, but he had had too many distractions considering his thoughts were not in order, some beautiful pink haired girl kept interfering with his homework.
Suddenly the portrait hole swung open, and in came Peter Pettigrew, looking pale and more tired than him. His dark blonde hair was up in all directions and his lips were green. His back was hunched and there were big holes under his eyes.
"Hello Pete" he greeted him smiling "You don't look good, how did it go?"
Peters grimaced and went to sit next to his friend.
"It was horrible Remus" he complained running a hand through his messy hair "she treats me like a 5 year old and she thinks I can't handle anything by myself… she was a complete nightmare, pure torture!"
Remus smiled sympathetically at him
"I though she was sick"
"She is sick, but she still doesn't like being treated, she wants to do everything by her own, and pushes me away when I'm trying to help, I nearly burned her hand because she wouldn't let me take her mug to make some tea" he said angrily "and she blames me all the time, she says I'm useless and clumsy"
Remus put a comforting hand over the plump boy, who looked miserable
"She doesn't mean that Peter, I think she was just pissed, that's why she said those things. Don't take it too seriously"
Peter shook his head
"No, she really means it, even when she's not mad at me she's horrible, and flinches at the sight of me, I've seen her…oh by the way…" he added moodily "she mentioned you three, from last holidays"
Remus tensed.
Why was Peter's mom talking about them? Maybe she thought they were taking him out of bounds. Was that why she had been horrible to Peter? He had never complained about her before. They went to visit him last holidays, but Mrs. Pettigrew had treated them very affectionately, of course she didn't know that he was a werewolf.
"mmm really?" he asked awkwardly "and what did she said? Maybe she doesn't like you to be friends with us"
Peter snorted and waved Remus's words aside
"Of course not, she loves the three of you! She's always reminding me that I'm not as good looking as Sirius is, and not athletic as James, and not even a little smart as you" he sighed heavily "Believe me Remus, she's got a big crush on you guys….and she's always comparing me"
Remus didn't know if he should feel better.
"I'm not that smart; Sirius and James always get better grades, and don't even study!" He said smiling and thinking that he was not helping at all "I know how you feel Pete, but think about this…my… condition has got me chained to a nasty future; you'll be able to get a good job, get paid and have a good social standard, marry and have children. Live a perfect normal life, you may have troubles, and yeah everyone has them, but me? Well… I just don't know, I dread the day we get out of school"
Peter watched the sad smile on his friend's face
"But you're very smart Remus, you'll find a way" he said miserably "You are a prefect, your mother loves you and thinks that you are the best son on earth, even pretty girls chase after you and will love to be by your side. Me? My mother hates me and thinks I'm ugly, fat, and stupid, even Sirius and James think that too…don't deny it Remus!" he warned him quickly when he saw that his friend was going to retort something "They are always telling me… I'm a goner! and not even flies chase after me…Merlin, I'm so depressed!" he said banging his head in the table
Remus snorted
"You sound like nymph hahaha with that phrase about being depressed, she uses it a lot, and like you…over stupid things"
"Sirius's hot cousin?" he asked not taking his face up from the table
Remus nodded
"Great! Simply great! First I'm sent home to take care of my ill mom, who hates me and calls me ugly, fat and stupid, then she compares me to you and now I sound like a girl" he said putting his hands in his head "I'm lost!... maybe I should like guys"
Remus started to laugh heartily
"I don't see the fun side" Peter murmured mournfully
"Peter! Hahaha what's that got to do with everything? Stop saying nonsense! You just had a rough week, there is no need to be depressed" he finished the sentence sneering
"You don't understand, you haven't got my problems"
Remus snorted again
"Yes of course, because lycanthropy is no big deal!"
"You are still a prefect, and Sirius's strange-named, hot cousin is after you" he said looking up at him, his head still resting on the table "the only time she's ever talked to me, was to ask me if you were in your dormitory or in the library"
Remus stayed wordlessly
"She's obsessed with you Moony, I've seen her chasing you, and getting every chance she can get to be around you"
Remus was getting nervous. He had tried with all his might not to remember the words she had said to him that morning. But the real thing was that she had said them, they were real, and he wanted to jump from the north tower.
"You…you think so?" he asked stupidly "she's just friendly, we had known each other for a long time, that's all"
Peter rolled his eyes
"Wish she were as friendly with me! Come on Moony don't fool yourself you know perfectly well that she loves you"
Remus looked away quickly, pulling the string off his hair, and letting it fall to his face.
I love you Remus…do you love me too?
Her voice was making a hole in his brain. He wanted to throw up.
"Moony what's wrong?" Peter asked him concerned "you look as bad as me"
"I've been feeling a bit off-color" he answered evasively
"Is the moon….?
"No, no it's not that"
"Maybe we both can go to the hospital wing" he offered "I'm having nausea, maybe something I ate before I came here. Do I look greenish?"
"Are you pregnant wormy?" asked a cheeky voice coming from the portrait hole
"Of course not!" he shrieked "Why do you always come with things like that Padfoot?"
"Just taking the piss" he said approaching them with a big grin on his face, James was behind him, gazing at the wall with a dreamy expression "Did you missed me Wormy?" he asked in a shrilly voice as he launched over him, hugging him and burying his nose on the boy's hair
"Oi Sirius! Get off me!"
Sirius ignored him
"Bet you did! How's mommy?"
"She's fine, now get off me!"
Sirius released him grinning
"Forgive me for having loads of affection to give"
"Your affection is suffocating and gay" Peter said stiffly getting his hair away from his face
"Ow! Little Peter is mad at me" Sirius said pretending to be hurt "and he thinks I'm gay…maybe he wished I was gay, so he could kiss me"
"No he doesn't, he had a bad day" Remus said giving Sirius a knowing look "So stop bullying him"
"I was not bullying him Moony" Sirius said outraged "can't anyone be happy these days? Come on prongs let's get outta here and get drunk with pumpkin juice!" He said sitting next to his dazzled friend
"What's going on with you both?" Remus asked them eyeing them suspiciously "You look too…cheerful"
"Haven't I just said we were happy Moony?"
"And why is that for? Wait… maybe I don't want to know"
"Yes you want to know Moony!" James said joyfully as he awakened from his trance. Then he realized that he had been talking to the wall, so he turned to Remus "Evans is finally going out with me next hogsmeade weekend!" His grin was wider than ever
Remus and Peter turned to look at each other with astonishment
"Now that is a great joke" Peter laughed
"It's not a joke guys! Evans is really going out with me!"
"Have you imperioused her?"
"No!"
"Did you threaten her?
"Moony!"
"Then why?"
"She agreed to go out with me!"
"You asked and she said yes?"
"hemm…yeah…kind of"
Remus and Peter didn't look convinced. James sighed.
"Padfoot you explain"
"No, you explain prongs; let me swim in my own happiness" Sirius said closing his eyes with a grin
"mmm ok then… well, you remember when I went to rescue her from Warwick?"
Peter was lost but Remus nodded
"Well, she wasn't attacking her…"
"I told ya!"
"Yes, yes, let me finish! They were having a snow fight, and she was to hit Lily 3 times to start the fight, but she couldn't, so poor Warwick had to keep trying"
Remus sneered
"Poor Nat, and why did you do to her?"
"Nothing, I just… well let's not get into many details. Evans started to shout at me, as she usually does, and we were arguing, when pads came with a great idea"
Remus rolled his eyes
"Wonder why I think it sounds dangerous"
"Because it was my idea Moony" Sirius said proudly putting his arms behind his head lazily
"Yeah, right"
"So he suggested we had a snow fight and a bet. Boys against girls, if we won Evans will have to go out with me and Pads would have to be kissed by Warwick"
Remus's jaw dropped
"And they agreed to that?"
James shrugged
"They were confident… maybe because if we lost we will have to stop chasing them"
"I see…so you won the bet" Remus stated crossing his arms
"Obviously!"
"And Nathalie kissed you? I can't believe that!" Remus said in awe to Sirius
"Not jet Moony, but she will" Sirius said jauntily as he put his feet on the table and crossed them lazily
Remus snorted
"Did she run from it?"
"Nope, I told her I will ask for my kiss in an appropriate moment"
"Knowing you, you'll choose an inappropriate timing for her" Peter said smiling
"How little confidence you've got in me Wormy" he said pretending to be hurt again "ha, and Moony Tonks was wondering where you will be" he wagged his eyebrows at him with a teasing grin "told me to tell ya that she was looking for you"
"Hemm really? Well… I was doing homework wasn't I?" he said nervously "Hey guys, I'll see you in a bit, I need to check something in the library before they close it" and with this last words he headed to the portrait hole and disappeared from his friends view.
XOXOXOXOXOXOX
"It's your fault! You made the deal!"
"You never helped! You hid the whole game; you could have stopped Black if you hadn't been such a coward!"
"I never had a chance! I suck at snow fighting, don't blame for this Evans!"
"You never had a chance? You had loads of chances! But you decided to run and leave us behind, how do you lose in 3 minutes Nathalie?"
"I'M TELLING YOU, I SUCK AT SNOW FIGHTING!"
"FORGIVE ME FOR TRUSTING YOU!"
"I TOLD YOU NOT TO TRUST ME! BUT YOU'RE FUCKING DEAF!"
"DO NOT SWEAR IN MY FACE NATHALIE DIANNE WARWICK!"
"I FUCKING SWEAR WHEN I FUCKING WANT TO, LILIAN!"
"GIRLS FOR GOODNESS SAKE, SHUT UP!" Tonks yelled in despair, her hair turning as red as Lily's with anger "This is crazy! We are friends! It was a stupid game, we lost and that's it! We are not a bunch of sore losers! So stop shouting at one another and keep your deal as the brave women that you are!"
"You both are like sisters!" Alice joined "Since first year, you can't damage your friendship over this stupidity!
They continue to say nothing
"Oh come on girls! They're James and Sirius! And it's just a date and a stupid kiss!" Tonks said with a voice that clearly stated: You are exaggerating!
"Black and Potter are very good looking guys! What's wrong with you girls? I mean, you're not dating or kissing Avery and Mulciber!" Alice said angrily
"They are marauders! And my cousin, Nathalie" Tonks said outraged "is the best looking guy on the whole school! I can't see your point. The way you're behaving about kissing him is a personal insult to me!"
Nathalie was biting her nails nervously, and Lily was playing with her sleeve.
"You both were stupid enough to do what you did, so now accept the consequences and…laugh" Tonks keep on "laugh 'cause it was a game and it was fun!"
Both friends looked at the snow covered ground, without knowing what to say.
"Yeah, Tonks is right, you got into this by yourselves, and you have to admit that it was fun, we lost and there's nothing we can do about it, but we are still friends, and you girls love each other, so stop being silly and hug right now!" Alice said earnestly
Nathalie and Lily eyed each other for a moment and then hugged strongly.
"Forgive me for blaming you Nat" Lily was saying in Nathalie's hair
"I shouldn't have said those things Lils, I'm sorry"
"You're my best friend, and I'm really sorry for making decisions without asking you first"
"You're my best friend too, and forgive me for being a coward, you're right, I should have helped" Nathalie said in Lily's shoulder
"That's a lot better" Tonks said happily embracing Alice
"Yeah, look at them, as if they could last being mad at each other"
When the girls broke the embrace, they took hands and smiled at Alice and Tonks.
"Sorry for making a show" Nathalie said "thank you girls, and don't be offended for Black Tonksie, it's not that I think he's gross or anything, quite the contrary, I know he's gorgeous, but he's always bothering me, and a kiss will inflate his ego even more!"
"Yeah you're right about that" Tonks said laughing "he's a prat"
"So can we now go up to the castle? I'm freezing!"
It was staring to snow again, and the cold wind kept blowing in their direction, making them shiver. They took each others arms and started to walk toward the castle in a rare trembling chain.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
When they reached the Gryffindor common room Tonks asked Nathalie if she could tell Remus, that she will be outside waiting for him. Nathalie agreed with a smile and the other girls said goodbye to her. She moved her fingers against the wall impatiently, she hadn't seen him since the morning and she missed him. Had he missed her too?
After a few minutes Nathalie came out from the portrait hole.
"He's not here Tonks, your cousin said that he went to the library for homework stuff like 20 minutes ago"
"Oh great, then I'll meet him there, thank you Nat, I'll see u around" she said giving her a quick hug
"Bye Tonks, see u!"
Tonks hurried to the library, feeling butterflies in her stomach. Sweet Remus, always reading, hiding from her behind the shelves, and avoiding her eyes as he played with his hair. But she was not going to give up on him, us much as he pushed her away. She didn't know why he kept doing it, but she was going to find out and destroy his excuses. He was worth fighting for.
"What are you hiding Remus Lupin?" she thought curiously
When she reached the library entrance she fixed her hair and began to search for a tall boy with a sad face. Madam Pince shot her a nasty look from her office; Tonks gave her a weak smile.
"Where are you Remus?"
A boy that had many books in front of him (must be investigating) smiled at her from a nearby table, she smiled back, even if she had no idea who he was.
And then she found him.
Remus was sitting on a table next to the window, he wasn't reading as she had expected, he was… asleep? She couldn't see his face, which was resting in his arms, a big book forgotten by his side. His breathing was calm and rhythmic.
She hesitated, but then very silently, sat in front of him. She watched him for what seamed an eternity, smelling his soft fragrance, listening to his breathing, and then very carefully she leaned closer and kissed the top of his head.
She waited
Nothing happened
Tonks bit her lip and then sighed. If only she could see his face! Watching him sleep had always been one her big wishes. She raised her hand and stroked his soft hair lovingly, burying her nose in it, and inhaling deeply.
"Merlin, he smells delicious!"
Suddenly she felt him move under her, so she returned to her sit quickly, waiting with her hands under her legs.
He raised his face from his arms and his amber eyes stared at her guilty blue ones. He seemed sleepy and disoriented.
"Morning love" she said smiling
He jumped startled, taking his hair away from his eyes
"What are you doing here?" he asked in a hoarse voice
"I came here looking for you" she said happily
"Sorry, I must have dozed off" he said clearing his throat
"You did…sorry for waking you up, but Madam Pince wouldn't have been happy if she had found you sleeping here" she said amused at the thought of Madam's Pince furious look.
"Yeah, I know…thank you Nymph" he said rubbing his eyes. Then he stood up from his seat and grabbed his book "Let's get out of here"
Tonks stood up too, and reached for his hand. He tensed, but took it anyway. She smiled to herself, leading the way out of the library. His hand was warm against her cold one.
"You're hand is frozen" he pointed out as they reached the hallway
"Yeah, we had a snow fight; my feet are numb!"
"You should sit by the fire in your common room"
"I have a better idea" she said turning around and facing him with a big smile
He knew that smile.
"Uh-uh"
He dropped her hand and took a step back looking worried.
"Nymph I'd better get back to the common room…I shouldn't have slept in the middle of my study…I was..."
"Dreaming about me?" she asked innocently
Remus blushed
"No...No, I was…I was a bit tired, that's all" he stuttered "I need to catch up with transfiguration… sorry, I'll see you later" he said curtly making his way to Gryffindor common room
Her smile vanished. Something was wrong.
She ran and grabbed his sleeve. Her eyes full of fear.
"Remus what's wrong?" she asked him shakily
He looked at her startled, why was she shaking?
"Nothing… nothing, hey I'm fine, just a bit tired" he calmed her "What's wrong? You are shaking"
She released his sleeve
"I'm just cold" she said evasively "But you're acting strange with me"
"I'm not…I mean… I'm just busy. But are you alright? You are shaking way too much" he said worried "Do you want me to take you to the kitchens, so you can have a hot chocolate?"
He was right; she was crossing her arms, pressing them tight against her chest, her legs trembling and her teeth chattering.
She shook her head, pushed him to the wall and hugged his warm torso "I just want you to hug me" she said as she buried her face in his clothes "I had missed you all day, and by the way you are avoiding my eyes more than usual…I though…I thought you were mad at me" she whispered between her chattering
Remus sighed loudly, resting his head on the wall.
"I'm not mad at you Nymph…it's just that…that I..." he sighed again don't knowing what to say
"Tell me what's wrong, I know something's wrong…I know you Remus" she whispered
"No... What can be wrong?"
"Why aren't you hugging me? I asked you to hug me" she reproached him
"I need to get going Nymph" he said tiredly
"No"
"Yes"
"Hug me please"
"Nymph, stop being a child!" he said raising his voice
She looked at him with wide reproachful eyes
"No, I'm thirteen; I can act as a child if I want to"
"That's fine, but I'm not a babysitter so let go of me now!" he snapped
"Now he's getting mad at me! Merlin I need to do something quick!" she thought fearfully
She tightened her grip on him
"No, I'll never let you leave" She said smiling.
And then she slid her cold hands underneath his shirt making him jump violently, her cold fingers caressing the warm skin.
"HAAA! Merlin Tonks! What's wrong with you?" He asked angrily
"Hug me now!" She demanded "Or I'll go further"
"Let go now! You're cold as hell!" he bellowed grabbing her hands and pushing her away
She took a step back and stared at his cold amber eyes.
"I'm sorry! It was a joke, sorry… sorry…" she said regretfully trying to embrace him again "I didn't mean to…
But he was backing away dropping her hands furiously to her sides.
"No, get away from me!" He said fiercely "You never listen to what I say, don't ever touch me again!"
And with these last words, he stormed out of the hall, and out of her view, a silent tear sliding from her cheek.
Yeah! Everyone thinks that Peter Pettigrew is Fat, ugly and stupid... puff I forgot to say coward too, but anyway please review! that motivates to write :) and this was a dramatic ending chan chan chan! hahaha
Thank you for reading!
*Hugs!*
Maythereza