Unbecoming: Chapter 7

A/N Everything in bold from now on is Trollish. So bold means Trolls are speaking in their language.

Burial

The long sterile hallways flickered on and off on the occasion. It seemed to be in the early phase of catching dust and deviating from the hospital like white cleanness the Janus Order had provided. It was an unfamiliar sight to Aarrgh, but the creatures within it were not. He felt the humming pull of forced purpose, a constant buzzing in the back of his head, calling to him, urging him to simply give in. He hated everything about it. He hated being so close to the one thing he fled. Even running away and rejecting everything he had been wasn't enough. Here he was again in such familiar armour and once again he was forced to walk among Gum-Gum ranks. Were his efforts for nothing?

The flow of controlled soldiers was always coordinated and despite their lack of free-will, Aarrgh knew they weren't any less individual than they were before. The Decimaar Blade made one loyal to Gunmar, but it did not change an individual's personality and prowess. Those soldiers weren't the enemy. They were simply Trolls who were unfortunate enough to fall into Gunmar's magic. Aarrgh could sympathise. It took a great deal of bloodshed before he could even think straight, before he did the unthinkable and said no to Gunmar's dark magic… but it was always there, lingering in the back of his mind, making its presence known when least expected. No matter how much he tried to run he never could.

He was tainted.

"What unit are you from?" a Gum-Gum asked bringing Aarrgh out of his thoughts.

"Patrol?" Aarrgh replied although it came out more like a question.

Aarrgh let out a sigh of relief when the Gum-Gum nodded and let it go. He was wondering whether the army used the same terms as they had before when he had been a commander. He was thankful they did because that meant he would know their moves better. Much to everyone's belief in regards to his smarts, Aarrgh was not slow in the brain. Aarrgh was a smart Troll but he had lived most of his life under Gunmar's control, being forced to learn the way of military before reading, or speaking properly. He was taught to give motivational speeches in Trollish, not to converse eloquently in Human-speak. Reading books and making conversation was something he left to Blinky, and it wasn't because he couldn't learn if he tried, but more because it would take a while for him to get a hang of it. It was easier to let Blinky do what he could not while he did the same for his friend.

He continued to move forward until he came to a large room. Most of the soldiers were lazing around. It was far from the scary spectacle they put during battles. Outside of war they were only Trolls, who had their own hopes and dreams clouded by Gumar's wills. They were not the evil, ever vigilant monsters many Trolls made them out to be. Aarrgh knew this better than anyone but sadly the sympathy was not shared. His thoughts were interrupted when he came upon a familiar blue glow underneath green marked armour. Aarrgh blinked in confusion before looking closer. His heart dropped in a second at the sight.

They were the Krubera Tribe markings… the markings of his tribe.

When the soldiers clambered up again, Aarrgh was once again not allowed time to settle his thoughts. Two cloaked figures stepped out, before pushing off their hoods. Six familiar yet cold eyes and the glowing azure markings of a Krubera Chieftain. Aarrgh froze on the spot.

It was Usurna and Dictatious

Line Break

It was in the darkness that Jim could see grief. Grief was one emotion expressed in multiple ways. Some people shut down, seemingly caught up in their own personal nightmare, others reacted outwards in bouts of anger and despair… he- he was allowed neither. He had nearly allowed himself the luxury of grieving, forgetting his duty as Trollhunter and allowing himself the time to wallow in self-pity. Blinky had taught him to harness those emotions, to use his frustrations and anger to achieve his goals and he had warned him that a Trollhunter was not afforded the luxury of protection. He was the protector and even though the Amulet had broken, somehow its call had not, and Jim found himself bestowed the same conviction as before; armour or not.

When he moved through the shelter he noted his mother was of the same position. As a doctor her skills were needed and although he saw the tired lines clearly on her face even in the dark, he knew she was focused. It was her duty to save lives as it was his. He carefully positioned himself so that she wouldn't see him. He wanted to hug her then and there but he had work to do and not the time to spare. Instead of moving to his mother, his attention turned to a familiar, yet unusual group of three. Gregory Lawrence, his coach, Señor Uhl, his Spanish teacher and Andrea Nuñez, Claire's mother, were grouped together discussing a matter. Apparently they had become the defacto leadership of the shelter. Jim moved to them so he could explain his proposition and the moment he was within their sights, their expressions hardened but they moved to let him in. It didn't take a genius to notice they wanted answers.

"Jim Lake, we have been meaning to talk," Andrea said folding her arms. "You come in protecting two monsters without explanation and disappear not a moment later."

"I can explain," he replied quickly before coughing awkwardly, "although it's sort of… unbelievable."

The silence and unamused looks were enough to make him nervous. It didn't help that these people were his teachers and his sort of ex-girlfriend's mother. He floundered on where to begin.

"They aren't monsters first of all, they're Trolls," he began. "I know it sounds fantastical but just stick with me."

And so Jim began with his story, about how he became Trollhunter and stopped the Killahead Bridge from activating and how he travelled back in time so none of it even happened. He kept the details minimal, leaving out as much as he could about Enrique in all of this. He was not ready to face the Nuñez family on that matter again but he knew the Goblins were fiercely protective of the young. They wouldn't leave to go topside without making sure the babies were kept in safety. For now they had more pressing matters and they couldn't have their attention elsewhere.

"So this is all your fault," Uhl growled out.

Jim flinched but managed to somehow keep a neutral face. Whatever the man had said was from his grief and Jim didn't fault that. He deserved every bit of spite they threw at him. He was the cause of all of this in the first place after all. So he made no move to stop Uhl when the man left to cool down.

"Let him calm down, his wife just died. He doesn't really mean anything by it," Lawrence sighed, "Although I'm finding it hard to believe you too."

"Whether you believe me or not is not important. What I came to say was that it's safe to go out during the mornings. Trolls can't physically move outside in the daylight without burning."

"Even if that is true we cannot risk everyone's life," Andrea cut in. "If the Trolls find out that we are still around our safety is at risk."

"I'm not asking for just anything," Jim sighed. "I'm asking for the people out there that need proper burials. We can't just leave them there to rot… Draal, Steve, Toby…"

Greg perked up at the name, eyes wide with horror. Jim was startled by the violent reaction. The large man grabbed his shoulders in a tight grip, face coming closer with what looked like desperate fear.

"Steve, what about Steve?" he asked with shaky voice.

Jim did not think he would ever see the day where Coach Lawrence looked scared. It was such a foreign and unfitting emotion on the normally hard and stoic teacher. Jim could not for the life of him understand why Greg had such a violent reaction to Steve's mention. Sure the coach liked Steve. It was evident in the way the man would always drive Steve a little harder than others during drills, or when he would praise him for doing something right, but it was most evident on how extra strict the coach was with him. Jim saw how much the man cared for Steve and he found it hard to swallow.

"Steve was… he was killed by a Stalking," Jim finally answered.

The man's grip on his shoulder loosened and he turned around to put a hand on his face. Jim had never seen the Coach so emotional before. He moved to put a comforting hand on the man's shoulder when Andrea beat him to it. She turned to him and shook her head in what seemed like a resolute no. Jim was left behind, watching as whatever help he thought he could get had left. He watched them disappear into the darkness and steeled himself. He took a deep breath as he picked up the shovel once more.

Some things you just had to do alone.

"We shall once again rule the world! Subjugate those who cast us into the shadows to forever live unnoticed underground! We will once again become the master race!"

Somehow hearing that from Usurna's lips made it all the more real. It took all his willpower from losing control and ripping her neck from her spine. Aarrgh calmed down, taking deep breaths and thinking of the texture of his favourite cassette tapes. Her betrayal was both unexpected and heartbreaking for Aarrgh who had grown up awed by her leadership and fairness. To see the Troll who had helped him curb his raged desires and rehabilitate him from Gunmar's magic, so obviously turning on everything she had said and working with the enemy… it hit him hard.

When Gunmar's bulking form stepped out onto the podium, Aarrgh had to force himself to bow down with the rest of the crowd. He couldn't help but let out a soft growl of pain and anguish but thankfully it went unnoticed. His body was bent but his gaze remained upwards, to the Troll who had ruined his life, to the Troll who had taken a part of his mind forever, and to the Troll who had given him hope and now broken it. Dictatious's presence was just another reminder of broken loyalties.

"In but a week we will enact the final stage! We will block out the sun forever! We will claim the top-lands for ourselves! We will be free!"

Usurna's speech sent the soldier's cheering with joy but as much as he needed to fit in Aarrgh could not bring himself to join in with the cheer. His heart was aching with deep sadness and ignited with righteous anger at her betrayal, but even more so he was worried at the news. If Gunmar had a way to block out the sun permanently then it would make it easier for Trolls to navigate the landscape at all times, to concrete Gunmar's hold on the human world and not to mention kill anything that required the sun to live. They would truly become unstoppable and Humans would have no place in this world. Aarrgh didn't particularly like humans but from what he had seen of them they were interesting and caring creatures. Jim was the only human he knew but if Jim was a human then the rest must be like him. He couldn't let them perish under Gunmar's iron fist reign. All of Troll-kind would be fighting a war against him as well if he were to conquer humanity.

Aarrgh moved silently away from the crowd, moving into the wide tunnels of the Janus Order's old base. He sniffed the ground, hoping to lead to some clues. If they were going to block the sun then there must have been some dark magic to cause it. Aarrgh knew from personal experience that dark magic required sacrifices, some of the inanimate kind and others of flesh and blood. None of it was good. He stumbled into a few rooms, some holding power crystals and others stacked full of books but nothing incriminating. The sound of whistling caught his attention. It was a familiar whistle, one he had heard in his time helping Draal. Following the sound he came into a large room, filled with prison like cages. His sight caught onto a familiar purple form admits many others. It was Namura.

"Aarrgh?" she asked cocking her head. "Did you join their pitiful ranks? Good choice, it will save your skin since you aren't an Impure," she spat bitterly.

"I did not join," Aarrgh said defensively growling.

"Then why are you here? To laugh at me? Well then go ahead. We will all be dead in a week anyway."

That caught Aarrgh's attention. He moved forward, hands moving up to grip the railings holding her back. For once he managed to look urgent and serious but he didn't focus on that. He needed answers. Stopping Gunmar had never seemed so important and urgent as it did now.

"Don't you know? Gunmar plans to sacrifice us Changeling's to the Pale Lady as offerings to conduct magic. He wants to block the sun and when he does the world will end."

Nomura's maniacal cackling echoed through the chamber. Aarrgh turned away but knew what he had to do now.

He had to rescue the Changelings.

For the life of him Jim could not remember why he chose this particular spot. It was the hill Blinky overlooked when he was in human form, where he had his dance with Claire, and where the sun shone brightest in the day… now when he thought of it that was probably why. Still, dragging a 200 kilogram stone body up a hill was no easy feat. Jim dropped down to his knees when he reached the site. Despite the ache in his body and his muscles protesting from exertion Jim found he preferred the distraction over the pains of his heart. When he stopped moving, when he was forced to pull the body out- that was when he felt real pain.

"I bet you're heavy for a Troll too," Jim wheezed as he put down the body as gently as he could.

He huffed a little before pausing and letting the situation fall on him. He laughed tiredly before it ended with him trying to hold back sobs. He didn't cry in the end which he was grateful for. He still had more work to do after all and only 8 hours in the day left to do it. He traced Draal's face with his hands, looking on at his old roommate with a grimace. The circle in the petrified armour stood out as a grim reminder of where the amulet had once glowed brightly.

"It was meant to be my duty," he sighed.

Tears didn't fall but the pain was unbearable. He grabbed the wheel-barrow and climbed back down the hill before hauling it into the back of the truck he found. Jim groaned as he let himself sit down in the borrowed truck. He shut the door and found himself reminiscing the day before he turned back time. He had stolen Señor Uhl's truck and landed himself, Claire and Toby in detention. The next day had found him and his classmates coming together in detention where he oddly had a great time. At the time he had not even thought of the possibility that any Troll would want him dead… that they would have him killed for one mistake.

Wiping away his tears, Jim shakily started up the truck. He had driven before today but never so freely. It took an apocalyptic scenario for him to drive and the thought had him chuckle. His mind was all over the place, switching from grief to nostalgia in an instant. Jim had never before felt so trapped in his emotions, never felt so gripped and controlled by them. He hated it so he tried his best to think light of the situation, to compartmentalise the pain, and to move forward like a Trollhunter should. He stopped at his next site, rubbing his eyes tiredly before getting out.

Steve…

Jim flinched at the sight. It was an old Shooley's restaurant, a place where families had come together to eat lunch. The roof had a broken street light cave into it. Steve's body was lodged into it, the 3 inch diameter of the pole jammed into his stomach. It was a gruesome sight, much more so than Draal's. Steve had fought a Stalkling and failed. That much was evident with the rips and tears in his arms. Jim closed his eyes and took a deep breath, biting back the nausea. He pulled himself into the roof with great effort before moving to the pole.

"I'm sorry Steve, you didn't deserve this," he whispered, "so let me at least send you away properly."

No one else was apparently going to do it. Jim braced himself, biting back the urge to gag as the smell of rotting flesh, copper and the buzzing of flies made itself very unpleasantly known. He grabbed Steve from under his arms and pulled him out from the pole. Jim coughed as he fell onto his back with Steve's form limply sprawled over his. Tears stung his eyes as he looked into the mockingly bright blue sky. It was as if the world was pretending this was just like any other day. He caught his breath before noticing the wetness seeping through his jacket. Deciding he was going to be a bloody mess anyway Jim took a minute to catch his breath before forcing himself upright and hauling Steve's body onto his back. The decent was painful and strenuous but nothing like hauling a Troll. Jim tried dropping Steve as gently as he could into the back of the truck but he ended up dropping himself along with the body. None of this was easy without the armour to give him added strength.

Mechanically he got up and moved to the driver's seat before buckling up. He drove back in silence, trying his best to not think of the blood drenching his once blue jacket, or the corpse of a kid his age he was lugging behind him. He parked the car at the bottom of the hike before taking down the wheel barrow and trying his best to drop Steve on it with dumping himself along with the corpse. His thoughts went to morbid grounds, remembering how the grave diggers poked fun at Ophelia's death in Hamlet. At the time it seemed rather inconsiderate, highly rude and disrespectful, but Jim was beginning to understand the need to water down the tragedy with humour. Looking at Steve's very dead face made his stomach churn with an emotion he couldn't quite understand. When he thought of Toby in this position it made him want to curl into a fetal position and never wake up again… yet he knew he would be doing the same for his best friend if he could. He wished he could. Yet there was no body to be found, only pieces of his clothing and traces of blood that went nowhere. At least if there was a body he could have respectfully buried it.

Once he had successfully climbed the mountain again he managed to drop Steve's body next to Draal's. He slumped to the ground before tiredly moving his hands to grab the shovel. Shakily he stood up and dug. The movements became mechanical. His thoughts stayed on digging and digging and nothing else. Even when his hands began bleeding from the strain he continued until he noticed the sun going down. He looked at the hole he had dug and wondered how the time had gone by so quickly. Shakily he stood up and brought the bodies in. He groaned as he dropped Steve down again before he noticed a glint. A small silver chain hung from his neck. Jim picked it up and opened the locket before finding a family picture. It seemed recent. There was Gregory Lawrence, Steve's mother and Steve looking rather annoyed at the Coach in the middle. Everything suddenly made sense now, why Coach had acted the way he did, why Steve had always been a little iffy at the teacher in school. He was his dad.

"I-I'm so sorry," he whispered to Steve as he pocketed the locket. He slumped down to take a breath, exhausted from the work and having not slept in nearly two days. "You know I never took you as a guy who wore a locket… seemed more something like Eli would do."

Who was he kidding? He was talking to dead bodies now. Jim picked up the shovel again this time working his way into covering the corpses up. He only stopped when he dug the crosses into the ground. This time he finally sat down for real and just looked. The graves were shrouded by the most beautiful view of the sunset. It's light cascaded over the horizon, framing Arcadia in its golden light, hiding the darkness that was about to come at its departure.

"You know I chose this place because of the view. Both of you haven't seen it yet… no one but Claire actually but even she doesn't know that I know. Of course the dead can keep secrets so telling you should be fine… You weren't such a bad guy Steve. Sure you bullied people but you looked like you were finally coming around. Draal… You woke me up way too much at night while you thumped around in the basement but I can forgive that… you taught me everything I needed to know about fighting. If it weren't for you I would have died long ago… it would have probably been better that way eh?"

Jim just kept talking, letting out his thoughts until his mind blanked and even then he reached for something more to say… until he could no more. Tears leaked from his eyes and he frustratingly tried to wipe them away. He shouldn't be grieving. He had no right!

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," he cried, burying his forehead into the ground and curling in on himself.

Jim's sobs echoed through the environment and in a moment of silence nature stood still.

This chapter was way longer than I intended it to be and took a whole lot more time than I imagined I would take to write it. It deleted twice, once when my computer randomly restarted and another when I wrote like 2000 words and it just didn't save. It was such a pain that I invested myself more into finishing it than I usually would! In your face computer. You think you can stop me from finishing a chapter! Well you can't because I'm da llama!

So people keep asking me is Tobey dead and I would answer but half the fun is guessing. He could be dead or he could not. It's part of the emotional impact when you find out his fate. Sorry for that XD

Sooo did you think I took the angst way too far? Should I tone it down a bit? Keep in mind it's only been 2 days since the invasion so all the emotions are fresh. I'm trying to be realistic about the consequences here but the more I think about it the more morbid the outcomes become. Aarrgh's character arc will be related to Usurna and Gunmar. Blinky's will be about finally being able to protect a Trollhunter. I'm not too sure about Barbara's but Strickler's will be similar to Jim's as they both need to fix their mistakes.