Molly

"Shit, shit" Molly was clinging to the back of a kitchen chair, bent over and swaying from side to side "How did I forget how much this bleeding hurts?"

"Well you know what I always say don't you, Molls? It's a lot harder to get them out than it is ….…."

"Yeah, I know, you told me Nan" She gestured with her head towards where Chloe was standing in the doorway hanging on every word "Chloe, come here and kiss me goodbye then go on out and get in the car, you're going to school whether you like it or not and I can hear your dad yelling"

"Why can't I stay here and keep you company until the baby comes?"

"Because I said so, now go on"

"Babies can take a long time, your mum might still be here when you get home from school" Nan was trying to be helpful but Molly was now irritated beyond belief with everyone and everything.

A horrified expression passed over her face as she muttered "Jesus, I bloody hope not"

She'd gone into labour in the early hours, but the contractions, although strong enough to wake her, weren't strong enough or close enough together to show that anything much was happening, but were just enough to stop her being able to drop off again. Charlie had rubbed her back until it began to annoy her, then she'd got up and walked around hoping that standing up and a bit of exercise would do the trick, but nothing had helped speed things up. In the last hour the contractions had begun to feel a bit stronger and had begun to hurt, but after nearly four hours they didn't seem to be that much closer together and Molly was now tired, frustrated and thoroughly pissed off.

Nan had been with them for three days now because Molly had started to panic about there being no-one to stay with the children if she had to go into hospital in the middle of the night and she didn't want to go without Charlie. She still hated hospitals despite all her years as a medic and an EMT and she still had no close friends in the neighbourhood, not close enough to call on at 3.00 in the morning anyway, and The Barn was just isolated enough to have no proper neighbours to shout for, as she could have done in east Ham or even Salisbury.

"Chloe, car, NOW. I won't tell you again" Lieutenant Colonel 'Stern Face' had made an appearance in the kitchen doorway using a tone of voice that took Molly straight back to her army days, one she hadn't heard him use before with any of the children. Chloe raced off yelling 'It's not fair" and "I hate you Daddy" as she went while Charles came over and kissed Molly's cheek saying that he wouldn't be long and was she going to be okay with Nan? She couldn't answer as another iron fist clenched itself round her swollen stomach but nodded and tried to smile as he hovered; jerking her head to indicate that he should go.

"This is the last time I'm doing this, never, ever, EVER again" She muttered through clenched teeth as the contraction ebbed away.

"I've heard that before, your mum used to say that every time" Nan chuckled as she bustled about clearing the breakfast dishes.

"Yeah, but I mean it"

"She used to say that as well"

"It's never going to happen again because he's never coming near me again"

"I've heard that one before too"

"Nan, stop being so bleeding annoying, I'm a trained killer you know"

"I ain't heard that for a while" Nan laughed as she came over and kissed her on the forehead "Go for a little walk round outside while I make a cuppa, get some fresh air, but stay close and don't go wandering off all over"

OOGOGOGOGOGOG

Just over four hours later and Olivia James was born, screaming her head off, to a tired but euphoric Molly, who'd forgotten all about her desire to have another boy as she listened to her daughter screaming blue bloody murder, showing that her lungs at least were wonderfully normal.

"Told you we'd get another Millie, didn't I?" Charles had the sort of smile on his face that you'd want to be able to bottle for when you were having a bad day "She looks just like her"

"Is she okay? You know got all her … everything?"

"Of course she is, she's beautiful and she's perfect, bloody noisy like her sister, but perfect" He laughed as the midwife cut the cord and laid Olivia on Molly's chest, tucking a towel over her and latching her onto her mother's nipple. Charles couldn't help his little pang of guilt and embarrassment that he hadn't managed to cut the cord for any of his five children, something which apparently all other dads do easily.

"Has she got a name?"

The midwife whose name was Sarah, as she'd told an incredibly bad-tempered Molly who'd demanded drugs or an epidural as soon as she'd admitted her. Sarah who was young and pretty had looked at the birth plan that Molly had prepared and lodged with her regular midwife who was, apparently, on a day off, and pointed out that Molly had opted for neither, only for gas and air. Molly was beyond irritated that Saleema, her normal midwife, wasn't there and was muttering about not seeing the bleeding point of always seeing the same person if they weren't there when you needed them. She knew she was being completely unreasonable and was in danger of having a blue mark put on her notes, marking her down as a pain in the bum, but she couldn't seem to stop, none of this was going to plan.

"Are you sure, Mrs James? You did say you didn't want anything"

"Yeah, well that was then and this is now, and I've changed me mind, okay?"

"Have you had an epidural before? This is your…." She looked at Molly's notes "Your fourth baby I believe"

"Yeah, but I never needed nothing before, they was all quick and this is taking for ever" This slim, well-spoken girl was making her feel as though she was asking for something that was wrong for some reason as she began to wonder what the fuck was taking Charlie so long, he was only feeding the pay and display thingy and she needed him here. Despite all his military organisational skills he'd forgotten all about money to feed the machine to cover the exorbitant parking charges and had had to go to the little shop in the foyer and buy a bottle of water to get enough change.

"Well let's see how you're doing"

The girl had finally finished filling in all the admission paperwork and was putting the monitoring band round Molly to check the baby's heartbeat and her contractions as Charles reappeared, much to Molly's relief. He'd fight her battles for her if she asked and she was so close to crying that she was tempted to ask him to do just that and to start doing it straight away.

Her contractions now felt continuous, as soon as one ebbed away another one started building and she wanted to scream "Just bleeding stop it for a bit" but she knew, without this Sarah telling her, that just like with Chloe she'd left it too late for an epidural. She grabbed hold of the gas and air pipe that Sarah handed her and started dragging on the mouthpiece, inhaling it like a desperate drug addict as Sarah gave her a quick internal, apologising all the time if she was hurting but Molly was beyond caring. The relief when she told her that she could begin pushing as soon as she felt the urge, was overwhelming as all talk about drugs and epidurals was forgotten.

"Her name's Olivia"

"Livvie"

"Charlie, we said we wouldn't do that"

"She looks like a Livvie" He laughed "Actually she looks like a little tiny Millie doesn't she? I'm really outnumbered now"

"Were you hoping for a boy this time?" Sarah had unlatched Olivia, who'd immediately started yelling again and had taken her to the other side of the room to weigh her and to do the assessments, an interruption to her sucking which had her strenuously objecting.

"No" Sort of" Charles and Molly both spoke at the same time then looked at each other and laughed as he leaned over and kissed her on the tip of her nose.

"Well, maybe next time" Sarah had dressed Olivia who'd finally stopped crying and wrapped her in her shawl before handing her to Charles to have a cuddle before he took her back to Molly.

"There ain't gonna be a next time" Molly sounded totally emphatic as Sarah laughed.

"That's what they all say; bet I'll see you back here next year"

"No you bleeding well won't"

"They say that as well"

Charles

Charles sat by the window rocking his tiny daughter who'd been sucking frantically on the back of his crooked little finger but who'd dropped off again for the moment. She had begun to fuss and rout around for a nipple a short while ago, and as Molly was fast asleep he'd lifted her from her plastic cot and tried to settle her although he was aware that it was just a matter of time before she started yelling for the real thing as she'd started to whimper and fuss again even though she still looked to be asleep.

As he sat and looked at her little face, his doubts about what he was doing had coming crashing through his brain, Christ he had huge responsibilities, Molly and four children, five now with this one, so what the hell did he think he was doing risking their security on a whim. The whole of the last month had been about 'last times', and 'good byes' and about consigning almost twenty years of his life to history and he'd never been less sure of what he was doing than he was now, when it was too late to change his mind. All the excitement of a new challenge had slowly drained away as the weeks had gone on and being at home for the past two weeks with another four to go before he started at DEC had left him with too much time to reflect and had underlined for him that he might have made a very bad decision. Molly had suggested that they should have a 'good bye' party and invite the lads, but it would have to wait, maybe until his birthday, because she wasn't going to do it nine months pregnant.

Olivia started to fuss so he gave her his crooked finger again to try and put off the moment when she started yelling for food and woke Molly, who was exhausted and had had trouble dropping off after she was born. He couldn't help the pang of regret that this was never going to happen again, that it was another 'last time' and that Olivia was going to be their last baby. He recognised that this had been a difficult, almost fraught, pregnancy for Molly, and that she'd meant every word when she'd said she didn't want any more and that he should take steps to make sure of it. She'd actually said she was sending him to the vet with Patch to get him seen to, until he'd pointed out that Patch was going to be castrated and he drew the line at that and that he didn't think she'd like it much either. Molly had laughed and said "Whatever", but Charles recognised that despite his reluctance, he should do what she wanted, it was the right thing to do, it was just that he was such a coward.

OGOGOGOGOG

Mollie and Charles

Livvie, as she was now called by everyone, might look like Millie, but there the resemblance ended. Millie had been a difficult baby, taking hours to feed and messing her mother about, using her as a dummy and then screaming blue murder when Molly got fed up and took her off the breast and tried to settle her to sleep, only sleeping for short periods of time before she wanted feeding again and getting her days and nights mixed up. Livvie only cried when she was hungry or wet, fed like a dream, burped obligingly then went straight back to sleep. At six weeks old she was just beginning to smile and her father was deeply in love with her. He hadn't spent anything like as much time with any of the others when they were this age, the army had always intervened, and he was fascinated with her. The fact that he was at home meant he could also spend a lot of time with the others so that not even Millie was jealous, in fact the novelty of a baby in the house had now worn off and they all just accepted her, even Sam.

The one thing he hadn't done was arrange 'the snip', he kept meaning to, in fact he kept promising to sort something out, but he just couldn't bring himself to actually do it, and his start date at DEC was now looming and he couldn't be less than 100% fit for that. Molly had laughed and called him a bleeding coward and pointed out that the dog had been fine afterwards, but he'd just shuddered and said that that was different, and anyway Patch didn't know what he was missing.

"Have you got everything, clean hankie, been to the loo?" Molly grinned at the sight of her husband looking drop dead gorgeous wearing a suit and a blue shirt as he got ready for his first day. She knew he hadn't slept particularly well the night before, even though they'd made love and he looked a bit weary round the eyes.

"Stop taking the piss"

"I'm not, well, I'm not really, I know you'll go and knock'em dead, well don't actually kill anybody will you, play nicely with the others" She was starting to laugh, trying to make him smile; he looked so serious "Don't look so worried, you'll be fine, better than fine, you'll be fucking brilliant"

She spent most of the day watching the clock go round and wondering what he was doing and hoping he was okay and then tried to work out just how many times over the years she'd sat at home worrying about him, either because he was in physical danger or he had some sort of problem to solve and why time goes so slowly when you're bloody willing it to speed up.

"How'd it go?" He was hot and a bit dishevelled from the commute, jacket slung over his shoulder and tie missing completely.

"I met about five thousand people, can't remember any of their fucking names or what they do, had a couple of meetings with another thousand or so, can't remember who any of them are either or what they do" He turned and beamed at her "It was fucking awesome"

OGOGOGOGOG

Author's notes: Thanks for all your reviews and kind comments; as you know this is the last visit to the Barn for a while; I may very well go back in a while, but I'll have to wait for inspiration to come knocking again first.

I am now working on something entirely new so I hope you'll enjoy that when I finally knock it into shape.