You probably hate me. Oh god, I'm horrible. Yes, I went on vacation, but I really didn't update because I was distracted by my other two stories, and I was too lazy to get out of the Writer's Block I was in. Unlike my other two stories, I don't really have a specific direction (I mean, I know what will happen, but I don't have every chapter completely mapped out). Well, without further ado, I own nothing and enjoy!
Whenever I entered the Royal Garden, I always expected to be greeted kindly and be welcomed in. Never once could I even have dreamed of finding myself tied up to a chair underneath the glass walls, facing a group of people I once called my best friends. As I first opened my eyes, I was completely perplexed. The first thing I became aware of was the tremendous amount of pain in my head. I attempted to put my hand on my head, but to my dismay, I was unable to move my hands. Panicking, I realized I was tied up to a chair with rope. My eyes widened, realizing I was kidnapped.
"So, you're awake." I jumped, not too far, turning to the source of the voice. Utau Tsukiyomi stood in front of me, her arms crossed. Suddenly, I remembered everything that happened; my betrayal, transforming with the artificial chara, fighting the guardians, getting knocked out. No wonder my head hurt. The last thing I remembered was a basketball bouncing down. So, someone, the culprit pretty obvious, knocked me out with a basketball. Finally, I realized I was in the Royal Garden. Behind Utau, stood all of my other friends, Ikuto included.
"Why…am I tied up?" I wondered slowly.
"Are you stupid?!" Utau stepped closer to me. "Hello, you work for Easter! We can't trust some petty traitor."
"So do you," I muttered under my breath. She glared at me.
"Well, we have some questions to ask you." Utau crossed her arms. "First off- why? Why did you betray the guardians?" I raised an eyebrow.
"Didn't I already tell you? I thought the guardians were stupid, so I-"
"Cut the bullshit," Amu hissed, to my utter dismay. When I looked at her, I was extremely shocked to see her looking angry and upset; Amu hardly cursed! It was clear she had just been sobbing. "That can't be true! Rima, you are extremely blunt; you wouldn't just think that we were stupid without saying it to us prior to betraying us!"
"What makes you think you know me so well?" I wondered.
"Oh, I don't know, maybe the fact that we were freaking best friends?!" Amu exploded into another fit of tears. Ikuto and Tadase both looked at her concerned, but Nagihiko beat them to comforting her. He hugged her gently, and she rested her head on his shoulder. Involuntarily, I felt my heart churn. I felt a tinge of jealousy, even though I was completely aware that it was not romantic. Though, it did dawn on me that I had no right to be jealous, since it wasn't like Nagihiko was my boyfriend anymore, not that we officially broke up. I noticed him intentionally avoiding eye contact with me, only making me realize I had been staring at him. I shifted my glance quickly back to Utau.
"You still have a question to answer." I remained silent. Utau stepped closer to me, and to my surprise, slapped me roughly across the face. I gasped in pain. The others, too, looked horrified.
"W-What?!"
"Oh Rima, did you really think this would be so simple? I'm treating you just the way Lorelei treated Kukai and Amu. Sorry, but you aren't getting out of this by remaining silent. Your boyfriend isn't coming to save you." There was a lot of confusion in the room at first by that comment. The guardians looked at Utau, puzzled. They had no idea about the slight chemistry between Winter and me. I felt nervous all of a sudden. I did not want them to find out about him, especially considering it was merely one-sided.
"I don't have a boyfriend," I muttered. Seeing Nagihiko glance at the ground and the melancholy etched upon his face made my heart want to shatter into fifty thousand pieces. I just wanted to break out of the ropes and embrace him- No, I couldn't feel this; I didn't care. I kept trying to reassure myself that I did not give a crap about the guardians, or Nagihiko. Why should I care if they know about Winter?
"What about Winter? I saw you two kiss the other day." Everyone looked up at Utau, surprised. "Oh, and just to clarify, it was while you were 'dating' Fujisaki."
"I didn't kiss Winter!" I exclaimed. "He has a crush on me, but he kissed me and I stood there confused!"
"Who is Winter?" Amu wondered.
"He was that guy who was fighting alongside her," Nagihiko explained gruffly. His voice just made me want to melt.
No, stop! I pleaded mentally. I could not allow myself to be attracted to Nagihiko. He was the enemy, and I hated him.
"Are you sure about that? You two really seem to get along," Utau flaunted.
"I'm sure that if I had a relationship with him, it would go much better than it did with you and him," I muttered. Utau smirked, much to my discontent. I was certain I had hit a nerve. Kukai's eyes widened, looking at Utau in confusion.
"Do you want to know what happened between Winter and me, when we dated? Well, long story short, we went on a few dates, I found him making out with another girl, and then I dumped him. He never really treated me well either. Even after, he kept calling me and trying to make dates. He's nothing more than obsessive. But hey, if you like creepy, then he's the perfect match for you."
"When did that happen?" Kukai wondered.
"Before you, don't worry," Utau reassured. Kukai sighed a breath of relief. "We only have one cheater in here."
"I never cheated," I mumbled, knowing no one would believe me.
"Maybe you never cheated on me, but you cheated on the guardians by joining Easter." Nagihiko's voice seemed strained. I forced myself to look at him. "It hurts that you had some sort of relationship with Winter, but nothing hurts me more than the fact you betrayed, and lied to us…me." He took a deep breath before continuing. "You looked at me that night, when we first kissed, and promised me you wouldn't lie to me." The anger in his voice was quite apparent. He looked at me, the pain evident in his eyes. "I should never have trusted you."
"You're a hypocrite," I muttered as calmly as humanly possible. He looked at me, surprised. "You always lie! How could you look at someone, and expect them to be honest, when you aren't? Have you ever told someone something that was even true?!"
"Well, I told a certain someone that I loved them, and I meant it completely," He retorted back. If I felt broken before, I must have been completely fissured now. I did not know how to reply back. There was a long silence in the Royal Garden.
"Guys, wait outside," Utau instructed. "Fujisaki and I can deal with this alone." I hardly even noticed the sting of being referred to as "this" when compared with Nagihiko's comment.
"But, can't we help?" Amu urged. Utau gave her a look, prompting Amu to sigh and go outside with the others.
"Keep an eye out for Winter or any other Easter employee," Nagihiko suggested. They complied, leaving the Royal Garden. I really did not want to be here, yet the ropes that tied me to the chair suggested otherwise. When it was just the three of us, I noticed Nagihiko cross his arms. Why was he voluntarily here, taking part in questioning me? Didn't it hurt him as much as it hurt me? Suddenly, it dawned on me. They knew it would hurt me to speak to him. That's precisely why they had me speak to him.
"You never answered our question, you know. Why did you join Easter?"
"I wanted to," I replied bluntly. I was about to cross my arms like the two figures in front of me, but then I quickly remembered the ropes that bounded by arms to the chair. I was certainly going to get a rope burn after this. However, that was not my big concern at the moment.
"Why did you want to? There's always some motivation," Utau pointed out.
"Isn't that enough motivation? I joined voluntarily because I was bored, and-" Before I could blink, there was another slap across my face. I cringed in pain.
"Utau…" Nagihiko started.
"She'll give in," Utau promised. "This is necessary. Now, Mashiro Rima, why don't you answer the question with the truth?" How could I tell them the truth; that it was merely to escape from my parents? I always tried to reassure myself, and tell myself that it was because I also hated what the guardians did, but those were just futile excuses, weren't they? It truly was to escape my parents; to go sleep soundly one night without their screams, without my father's slurs from his new addiction with alcohol, and without them blaming each other and me.
"Why did you leave the stove on, Rima?! It wasn't going to turn off itself!" My mother yelled at me. My eyes lowered. It had just been a careless mistake.
"I-I thought you were going to," I admitted. "I didn't know…"
"You are so ungrateful for what we do! You should take responsibility! You are so spoiled." My mother slapped me across the cheeks, making me cry out in pain.
"She's only spoiled because you spoil her!" My father exclaimed. My eyes darkened; why did they have to fight now?
"I do not; it's you who spoils her!" They continued their juvenile arguments, unbeknownst to the amount of pain I experienced. I wanted to scream and cry. They continued fighting, until it suddenly took a serious turn. My father lifted a chair, and threw it in the direction of my mother. I watched, horrified.
"You are a horrible bitch. Why did I marry you?!" Then, the drunken man turned to me. My eyes dilated, frightened out of my mind. "It's your fault! You ruined our relationship; you made it so goddamn impossible to escape. You are a bitch too!" My father brought his fist to my cheek. I cried out loud, and felt myself run as fast as I could, and slam the door to my room. I was in an eruption of tears. I didn't want to stay here anymore; I couldn't. I was too scared in my own house. I threw things into a suitcase, without properly thinking it through. My eyes were slightly blurred, due to the tears that cascaded down my cheeks.
"Where are you going?" Kusu-Kusu wondered.
"I don't know; anywhere else!" I cried, collapsing on my bed. I could still hear their shouts. I covered myself with blankets, and allowed myself to cry endlessly.
The next day, I lugged the suitcase, and bluntly told my parents I was leaving. They acknowledged me for half a second, before returning to their fights. This time it was about my father throwing up after his hangover. I ignored the tears that dared to escape my eyes, as I slammed the door behind me. I wondered around for that day, and came across a sign for job offerings. I noticed one mention something about having your own complementary room. I smiled slightly, until I noticed the company of which this was for.
"Rima, you can't join!" Kusu-Kusu exclaimed. "That's Easter, the biggest enemy of the guardians." In my heart, I knew it was wrong. I loved the guardians immensely; how could I betray the people that helped me so much? Amu had managed to melt my cold exterior, and found me a place with the guardians. Yaya always was there for me as well. And how could I forget that pathetic purple-haired cross-dresser? Despite what I might have liked to believe, Nagihiko was always there for me too, and he was always someone that listened to me. Besides, whenever I was with him, I did feel happier.
"What else am I going to do?" I whispered softly. "I'm not going back home Kusu-Kusu. Easter will let me in. They could have many uses for a spy on the guardians. I don't have a choice…" I clutched the flyer tightly in my hand, and made my way to the building where my supposed enemies used as a base. However, that was about to change. I opened the door, and then…
I felt a rough slap across my face. For a split second, I thought it was my mother. However, the iconic blonde pigtails confirmed that it was not.
"Being silent isn't going to help you," Utau pointed out. I could feel my eyes watering, upon recalling that memory. What if I had never left? Well, I could guarantee I would have many more bruises. Maybe everything would have been simpler. Now, I do have a place at Easter, but no one who truly understands me like the guardians. I lost the only friends I ever had, the people I trusted the most. Heck, one of my former friends was slapping me and arguably torturing me. My own chara hated me! Maybe I had Winter, but he only stays around me, because he has a crush on me. It's not like he knows a thing about me really.
"That's why I left, I swear," I repeated. "I hated the guardians, I hated what you all did, and I wanted a break. I wanted to betray you because I-I hated…"
"Who are you trying to reassure; us or yourself?" Nagihiko wondered. He was looking at me for a moment, but I couldn't find any emotion. He was completely stoic. I could not answer his question, since I knew the answer, and I didn't want to admit it. Utau lifted her hand, but Nagihiko grabbed her wrist.
"She's not telling us anything!" Utau pointed out, turning to him. "We need to-"
"She's breaking," Nagihiko pointed out, watching me curiously. "She's going to tell us soon." Utau sighed, her arms now crossed. I had to prove him wrong; it's what I always tried to do. In school, I always competed with him, and sought to get a higher grade. I never was successful, since the stupid idiot managed to receive one hundred on nearly anything. I had to beat him at something… I knew that he was completely right; I was losing it.
"I…I…" I stifled the tears that attempted to escape my eyes. "I don't know! I just don't know!" My stifling attempts completely failed. I tried to open my mouth again to speak, but I was crying far too much. I tried to wipe my eyes, but of course, I was still tied up.
"What don't you know?" Utau wondered.
"T-They treated me like…like shit. I-I couldn't… I had to… I-I could escape; I…"
"Who treated you like shit? Lorelei?" Utau wondered.
"No, she means her parents," Nagihiko realized. Of course he figured it out. He looked at me, his eyes practically piercing through me. I knew he was trying to read me at that moment, and figure out everything. I tried to blink back tears, but I was unsuccessful.
"They fought a lot, didn't they?" Utau wondered. "Amu mentioned it to me." Nagihiko nodded slowly, though he didn't remove his eyes from me.
"It was more than fighting, right?" His voice softened, as he took a step toward me. I watched, completely stunned.
"Nagihiko, don't get too close," Utau warned.
"I know," He whispered. "Did they…physically harm you?" I could not utter a comprehensible answer, so I merely nodded. "You couldn't deal with it, right? After they harmed you, you just needed to get out, escape their horrible treatment. Easter provided you with a bed, so you went there." I stared at him, astonished.
"H-How did you figure all of that out?" I whispered. I could almost see him fight back a smile, but he still had a small one that just made him look extremely attractive.
"You're surprisingly not too difficult to read, Rima. I should have speculated that at first. I guess I was just too taken aback. But there is something I don't get." I could feel his eyes bore into me. "Why didn't you talk to Amu-Chan or me about this? You could have just stayed at one of our houses; why turn to Easter?"
"I-I guess…I-I…"
"She didn't want to admit it was true," Utau interjected. "If she turned to Easter, she could uphold the lie. She didn't have to admit to the harsh truth." I could feel more tears crawl down my cheeks. It was frightening how valid that statement was. "I felt the same way when my father left. I didn't want to believe it, so I made up these fantasies, and often went somewhere else."
"I'm sorry," I blurted out, my voice sounding strained. Both of them looked at me again. "I regret it; I-I regret everything! I-I didn't know what I was doing. I sort of just…I don't know. I… I didn't know what I expected would happen. I just…I should have known that my actions would result in the loss of all of my friends; the people I loved. I don't have anyone now…" It baffled me how I managed to make it through all of that without bursting into hysterical crying. To my utter bemusement, I felt a hand upon my shoulder. I looked up, and saw Nagihiko quite close to me. Despite all of my tears, I was certain my face appeared quite red at that moment.
"You need to rest, Rima," Nagihiko told me sweetly. He was smiling slightly. "You just need a break from all of this."
"Nagi… why…"
"Shh…" He put a finger to my lips. "I'm going to be completely frank with you; everything isn't magically patched up now. I need some time before I can trust you again. However, this is a start." He removed his hand from my lips, and at that moment, I wondered if he was going to kiss me. I felt his hands move to the back of me, as if he was going to pull me into an embrace. I soon realized that he was undoing my ropes.
"Nagihiko, are you sure about this?" Utau wondered.
"She's too vulnerable to pose a threat," He pointed out. "It's okay."
"Nagi?"
"Hm?" He continued untying me.
"I-I didn't lie about everything… I-I truly did-" Before I could continue, the doors suddenly opened, revealing Kukai. Utau looked at him, concerned.
"He's here!" Kukai exclaimed. "Winter."
"Shit," Utau muttered under her breath. Nagihiko let go of me, and turned to Kukai.
"I am here," He pointed out, strolling inside the Royal Garden. He was transformed with the artificial chara. "Back away from her."
"Not a chance." Nagihiko transformed into Beat Jumper. Kukai looked at Utau skeptically, nodding over to Nagihiko. Utau gave him a look, to which he nodded. I watched, as Nagihiko tossed a basketball at Winter. He evaded Nagihiko's attack, and went over to me.
"I'm here now," Winter promised, untying me completely. In my mind, I felt slightly disappointed. I followed Winter reluctantly outside, turning around quickly. Utau attempted to attack, but Winter put some invisible shield around us. I met Nagihiko's eyes. I thought I saw him smile at me.
"Rima-San, did they hurt you?!" Winter exclaimed, as we arrived back at the Easter Headquarters. I remembered Utau's slaps, but slowly shook my head. "You look like you were upset…"
"No… I'm fine. I just…got scared," I lied. I knew I sounded like some fragile girl, but I didn't really care. He smiled up at me, and took me back to my bedroom.
"You should rest." I nodded, and went into my room, collapsing on the bed. What was I doing here? I didn't belong here. I was a guardian.
"Kusu-Kusu? Are you still here?" I wondered, fully knowing she was enraged at me.
"I told you not to come crying back to me," She retorted back. I sighed.
"I wasn't. I just wanted to make sure you were still here." She exhaled deeply.
"I might be mad at you Rima, but I'm always here to look out for you." That was enough for me. It didn't take me long at all to fall to sleep. I had no idea what would happen from here on out. However, the next morning, I never would have expected the knock on the door to change everything.
"Come in," I grumbled, barely awake. I was surprised to see Utau walk in my room. Her arms were crossed, as she drew nearer to me.
"Hello Rima," She greeted. I gave her a small nod. "Actually, I wanted to speak to about something; a proposition."
"What?" I wondered.
"I know you want everyone to forgive you. I could see how much you were blushing when Nagihiko got close to you." My cheeks reddened. "So, I have a suggestion that might help you out."
"What's the proposition?" I wondered.
"You've gotten quite good at lying to the guardians about your involvement with Easter. Suppose you switched it around? Lorelei trusts you. You could obtain information from Easter, and give it to the guardians. You could act as a double spy."
This is kind of a lame cliffhanger, but a cliffhanger nonetheless. I promise, the next update should be sooner, since I know what's coming. Thanks for your patience! Please review/favorite/alert!