"See how they're sectioned off? Each of them are called frets. I don't really know how to read sheet music, so I find these old documents called guitar tabs, and that's how I learn." Alyssa pulled out the datapad that had her tab of the song she wrote. She sat behind Joker, draping her legs on either side of him.
"The first part, you have to put this finger on the third fret, along with this one."
"I feel like my fingers are going to fall off."
"I felt that way when I first started learning. You'll get used to it."
"But you're forgetting something: I could break my foot just by tripping." Alyssa laughed.
"You're just being overdramatic." She placed Joker's fingers carefully on the strings.
"Now you pluck those strings, along with that one." She moved Joker's right hand over each string, playing the first part of her song. She then switched his fingers on the frets to finish the part.
"Now all you have to do is remember where you're fingers go and which ones to pluck, and you'll be able to play as good as me! Ow.." Alyssa's quirky remark turned into a river of pain. She leaned forward on Joker, basically putting all her weight on him. He turned around, and her face was twisted, showing how much pain she was in.
She breathed in sharply, trying to control her pain. She held her stomach and the small of her back, hunching over as Joker held her by the shoulders.
"Try and control your breathing. It'll help with the pain. Remember what I told you?" Joker asked, switching places, now sitting behind her. He wrapped one arm around her waist, and placed the other strategically on her shoulder.
"This is going to hurt. A lot. Ready?" She gave a weak nod as Joker tried to straighten her body. She gave out a small cry in response to the pain that was surging through her body. He could feel her body twitching, trying to fight the pain. He then tightened his grip around her waist, and hoisted her up, eliciting another cry for help from Alyssa. He motioned for her to lean back on his body, trying to stretch out her back as much as he could. He moved her body from side to side, and eventually the pain started to subside.
"Thank you," she weakly said, wiping the tears from her eyes. Joker kissed her on the forehead.
"You should go see Chakwas about your back. It's getting pretty bad." Alyssa seemed to dismiss that statement, which left Joker puzzled.
"She already knows about my condition. It's being attended to. By you."
"No, I mean this is getting really bad. I don't want anything happening to you. What if-"
"What if what? I told you that it's being taken care of." Joker huffed.
"Fine. If you're going to be so stubborn about it, I'll see her and tell her myself."
"You better not! I swear Joker-"
"You swear what? I'm just trying to fucking help! I actually care about you, and that says a lot."
"Well if you really cared you would just let me deal with this on my own." Joker turned to walk out of the room.
"Fine. But if you have another spasm like that, don't expect me to be there. I'm going in for my shift."
The doors swished open and close, and Alyssa was left there in the quiet room.
Joker sat in the cockpit, replaying the recent events in his head.
Why was she refusing to see Chakwas? Why did she just suddenly blow up on him? All these thoughts and questions swam through his head. He heard footsteps behind him, and turned around, hoping that it was her.
"Hey Joker, are you alright? Alyssa seemed pretty tense in the mess hall." Shepard came up and sat next to her pilot. Joker let out a frustrated sigh.
"We got in a huge argument earlier. Huge. Like, we were yelling at each other huge." Shepard crossed her arms.
"What did you do?"
"I was trying to fucking help her! She had another one of her back spasms, and I told her to see Chakwas, and then she blew up! I thought she was going to rip my head off.." Joker pressed some buttons on the console.
"I told her I would go ask Chakwas if she wasn't, and she said she doesn't want me to help."
"Have you tried to ask her why she doesn't want you helping her? Or why she won't go see the doctor?"
"No. She's been really snappy with me lately, though. I just shrugged it off but now she's just being a real bitch." He looked up at Shepard.
"Shepard, I can't believe I'm saying this to you. I think I love her." Shepard's jaw dropped to the floor.
"I never thought I'd hear that from you. I didn't know you were capable of loving."
"I didn't know you were capable of being a bitch, too." Shepard laughed.
"She seems like a good girl, just tell her that. Like in the old vids when the man would go 'I've fallen for you, and I can't seem to get up.' And make sure you give the convincing look, too." Shepard knelt by Joker's side and gave puppy dog eyes and pouted her lips, as if to mimic the vids she watched in her room. Joker laughed, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Now I know never to go to you for relationship advice. Ever again. Apparently they forgot that part in your N7 training."
"Ass. But seriously, just tell her how you really feel. It'll make her feel a lot better. I could tell she looked hurt when I saw her earlier. And try to be more patient with her." Shepard started to get up.
"Just don't do what Kaidan did to me on Horizon, or I'll have to personally kick you out the airlock." Shepard started to walk away, when Joker grabbed her hand to stop her.
"Hey. Thanks. If this works, I owe you big time." Shepard gave a warm smile, and nodded.
"You can pay me back by testing out that IFF while the team is gone. Let me know what you come up with."
"Aye aye, ma'am." Shepard left Joker to think about their conversation. Soon enough he heard footsteps again, and the sound of someone sitting in his co-pilot's chair. He looked over to see Alyssa, her face focused on the screen in front of her.
"Hey."
"Don't talk to me."
"What did I-"
"Let's just get this testing done and over with. I'll be leaving the next time we dock."
"What?"
Alyssa looked at Joker with red eyes.
"I saw you and Shepard talking from the CIC. Don't try and lie to me. Do you think I'm stupid?"
"Oh my gosh, Alyssa! You really think me and Shepard-"
"Yes I do because I saw it right in front of my eyes! You know," Alyssa got up and stood in front of Joker.
"All my life, I was on my own, and I did just fine. When I met you, I thought that you'd be there for me, through everything. Obviously, you had other plans. I guess I was wrong about you. I thought I loved you-"
"Just stop, okay! Stop. I don't want to hear this bullshit right now." Joker gave a frustrated sigh, and ran his hand through his hair.
"Let's just get this testing done and over with."
A few minutes of intense silence passed by before Shepard came over the comm.
"Joker, we're heading to the shuttle. How much longer until we reach our DZ?"
"We are actually at the DZ right now. Happy hunting."
"You're brilliant, Joker. Good luck with the testing." Joker could feel Alyssa rolling her eyes at their conversation.
"Do you honestly think there is something going on between me and Shepard? I mean, really?" Joker asked, starting the tests with EDI and the IFF.
"I would have to be blind to not see what was going on between you two."
"IFF has officially been integrated into the system, Jeff," EDI said, interrupting their conversation.
"Thanks EDI. Well you're wrong. There is absolutely nothing going on between us. We're just best friends-"
"That's what you guys always say. 'We're just best friends.' And then I'll eventually catch you two in the cockpit or something sooner or later."
"Are you stupid or something?"
"I'm not stupid, just cautious. Look," Alyssa swiveled her chair to face Joker.
"I'm sorry for being a jerk. It's just-"
Their consoles beeped and turned red.
"EDI! Status report!"
"I have detected something within the IFF. I believe we are transmitting our location."
Joker and Alyssa looked at their screens, trying to figure out what is going on.
"Looks like radiation bleed to me," Alyssa said.
"I have detected a signal embedded in the static. We are transmitting the Normandy's location."
Joker stared at his console.
"Transmitting? To who?"
"There's no sign of any other vessel around us," Alyssa said, scanning in every direction possible.
All of a sudden, a huge ship seemed to manifest in front of the Normandy. They both looked outside, looking at the massive structure.
"What is that?"
"Shit!"
Joker started pressing buttons on his console.
"We're getting out of here!"
"My console has been disabled!" Alyssa yelled, frantically trying to get her console to work.
"Propulsion systems are disabled. I'm detecting a virus on the ship's computers."
"A virus? How did we not catch that?" Alyssa stood up and moved to be next to Joker. She opened up the comm to alert the rest of the crew.
"All hands on deck! There's something fishy going on. Be prepared to get boarded!"
"Damn it, why didn't you scrub it?"
"Primary defense systems are offline," EDI said. Alyssa and Joker gave a frustrated sigh.
"We can save the ship, but you must help me. Give me the ship."
"What do we have to do, EDI?" Alyssa asked, looking at her hologram.
"What? You're crazy!"
"There's no time to argue Joker! You have to trust her!"
"Unlock my sealed database and I can initiate countermeasures. You will have to get to the AI Core through the maintenance shafts."
"Joker, you stay here, I'll take care of EDI."
"Alright, be careful!"
Alyssa left the cockpit and started to make her way to the maintenance shafts.
"EDI, I want your eyes on her. Don't let her get taken by those.. things."
"The collectors have boarded, Jeff."
"Joker! I'm in the maintenance shaft, I think I'm going to end up in Life Support," Alyssa said. Joker let out a sigh of relief.
"Glad to hear your voice. Just make your way through the medical bay and you'll be at the AI Core."
"They took Kelly! No! Get away! Ge-AHH!"
"Alyssa!"
"They took Alyssa, Jeff. I don't see any sign of her on the crew deck."
He thought the feeling he felt when Shepard died on the first Normandy would never resurface.
Hearing Alyssa's blood-curling scream brought that feeling back, and so much more. Joker banged his fist on his armrest.
"No! Alyssa! Are you there? Please say something!"
"Alyssa has been taken, Jeff. You must unlock my databases."
Joker got up, and started hobbling towards the shafts.
"You lost everyone and damn near lost the ship to?" Miranda asked, fiery eyes looking at a depressed Joker.
"I know, alright! I was here!"
"It's not his fault, Miranda. None of us caught it," Jacob said, trying to defend Joker.
EDI came to the conclusion that the virus was more sophisticated, and there was really no way of knowing it was there. After more bickering from Jacob and Miranda, EDI and Joker reassured them that the ship was fully purged, and EDI was able to confirm that there would not be another instance like this ever again. Shepard gave orders to be ready for the relay jump, and dismissed everyone but Joker.
"What happened to Alyssa?"
Joker looked down at his feet. All he could think about was her screaming in his ear, and how he couldn't do anything to save her. He started to sob, trying to hide it from Shepard. She could see his body raise up and down.
"Joker?"
She touched his shoulder as he looked at her, tears running down his face.
"Oh, Joker.." Shepard hugged Joker tight, trying to calm him down.
"They took her! And I couldn't do anything! She told me to stay, but I should have went with her.."
"It's okay, it's okay. You did the best you could."
"No I didn't. If I did she'd be right here, next to me. And I could tell her I was sorry for the things I said.."
"The faster we get through that relay, the faster we can get our crew – and Alyssa – back. Go to the cockpit and get us through that relay."