Hermione's POV
It seemed like it had happened to someone else. Like maybe it was a fairytale, except it was too gruesome to be. I was lying on my bed trying hard not to let the tears fall down, but he had been right. We weren't over it, I wasn't over it. I could close my eyes and see every one of them; no matter how much I showered I could still feel them on me, in me. When I looked in the mirror I saw a victim, a shell, a broken girl. I could hear my door open, and I could sense Draco standing in the doorway.
"I'm sorry." I muttered softly, biting my lip as another tear slowly escaped down my check, it was hot and stung.
I could hear his footsteps towards me and him sniff, as if he had been…crying?
"No, I was supposed to protect you…I should have protected you and I failed." Draco whispered softly climbing on the bed and wrapping his arm around my waist to pull me too him.
"When I first saw you, when we were eleven you were so beautiful, and to see how smart you were, and witty. How terrified you made Potter and Weas-"He stopped and gently squeezed me.
"When Voldemort told me I was too get close to you, a small part of me delighted in the chance…but I was so scared, I couldn't do it…I couldn't get close to you because that meant I would only hurt you." Draco shook his head as if he were trying to remove a bad image.
"I thought that if I stayed away you would be safe, and it worked…until I saw you at my house…and Bellatrix had you…You screamed, and it felt like a knife, that I couldn't pull out. Even if I could, I wouldn't have, I wanted to feel the hurt you did, God baby if I could take it all back I swear I would and I would go through it for you a thousand times over." He whispered, although he seemed to be talking to himself, I let him continue.
"Then that house elf took you away…and I thought you would be safe surely for now...and even if I couldn't be there you had Harry and…" He stopped again.
"Where we were getting ready to go to the castle that night I heard them whisper about you…and how much Voldemort would pay if someone…"
"Say it Draco." I whispered. "We need to say it." I said softly, I began to shake…saying it made it real. Saying it made it no longer a story. I let out a small sound, unable to tear if it was a cry or a gasp. "We need to be able to talk about…my…my…" I shook a little harder.
"No. No we don't have to say it yet. I'm sorry; we don't have to say it." Draco said softly.
"No, we need to talk about my…rape." The word came out quickly, almost as if someone else had said it. He waited as if expecting me to cry, which I was…but I guess not the way he expected because he continued.
"If they…what the price would be if they…if they raped you." He said softly.
"I killed them; I didn't know…that others…those others did." He kissed the top of my head and I felt something drip onto me and I knew it was a tear.
"I just keep failing you, I'm so scared that I'm going to lose you…that prophecy…I'm so scared I'm going to lose you, and I can feel you pulling away from me…please, talk to me Hermione. I don't know how to help but I want to help you… I want to listen, I want to hold you, I want to make it stop tell me how to make it stop." He said almost frantically.
I rolled out of his arms and looked at him. There he was, the prince of Slytherin, reduced to tears on a floral bedspread.
"It hurts." I whispered softly.
"You feel…helpless." I closed my eyes and shook my head.
"There's nothing you can do…you can't move." I murmured.
"Even if you can…there's nothing you can do. I couldn't speak, I couldn't fight…I couldn't breathe." I whispered softly opening my eyes and looked at his.
"I'm so scared that you're going to see all that has been done to me, and realize I'm not worth it. That it would be so much easier to find another girl, to just let the prophecy come to pass…there is no miracle." I whispered softly.
I traced the scar on my arm ''Mudblood.'' He reached his hand out and took my arm looking up at me. "You are worth so much." He whispered kissing each letter.
"You're so smart, and brave, and kind. You're so beautiful, and loving, and pure." He whispered.
My heart stopped and I started to cry. I felt his arms wrapped around me and we tumbled to the bed, me on top of him. I froze.
"I'm sorry." He said softly untangling himself from me and sitting on the bed. "We should…move out to the living room…less…um…intimate." He nodded. "Yeah, yeah that's good."
I shook my head and held my arms out to him. "Dray…honey just hold me." I whispered softly.
"I need you to hold me tonight." I whispered.