AN: "nene" means baby in Spanish.

I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE SKECTS OF "LES LUTIERS"! (pity , maybe some of you will recognised it.)

Okay a lighter chapter. Hopefully you'll find it funny.

Why me? That was her only current question. Why did her parents have to get killed by a pack of crazy and sadist kids? Why did they had to be the judges of two sea gods that were arguing over a game of domino and Felix had to convince them to let him play? Thankfully or not Felix had been able to beat them and cause them to at the same time hate him and own him a favour in exchange of a class of domino. Gods, Felix was weird. After that she had been persecuted by a god, oh and probably her future godfather just seen how he protected her; that loved to appear as the ugliest thing she had ever seen and tell her about the news in the mode world, no but, seriously? She could understand that he would be a Greenpeace fan, whatever it was, or a freak patron, or who knows what, but that? He didn't even have a real style!

Why me! What was going to be next? A flying pig? The son of the cow and the horse? She more or less believed next time she would be facing a goddess that was going to be steaming like a train. Yep, speaking as Fernando, like a fumata. Could her life get any more mixed up with those immortals? Why did they cared she liked Celtboy? It wasn't as if she persecuted them to know how many times they had run into a girl and kicked her to the floor. It wasn´t as if she had born out of Jupiter's thigh! Or did she?

Of course Juno was already waiting for them, they bowed respectfully at her proud face and, ugh, she knew she was in trouble. Great. Why me?

The Queen of Heavens studied her with all the warmth a cow could show you, her eyes peering like a bird of prey, trying to get to her soul. She smiled coldly at her.

- It is nice to meet you Nina Robison. – Well if you were lipping my face in your animal form I might've been able to believe you just a little. And she was the goddess of Family? Then she was the queen of England. Nina managed her most diplomatic smile and tried to stay elegant for that peacock.

- It is an honour, my lady. – She said bowing low. And if I could wip away that disgusting expression of you it would be better, she thought. She felt her glare intensify but seemed to decide it wasn't worth it. She turned to the crowd.

- Romans, as you've heard old enemies are stirring and start to cause serious problem to us. – Oh, seriously? We haven't noticed. Why do you think Felix has left trying to stop Lex? Again she kept it to herself. – And we need to start fighting back the Titan Army before it becomes strong enough to menace Olympus… - Someone started laughing, Nina was suddenly afraid that she was the one, but she knew that voice. Oh, gods. WHY ME?

Everyone parted leaving away a space, showing the ugliest giant that had ever stepped on Earth. His face was completely distorted, one eye bigger than the other, with different colours. His teeth partly shattered, partly green, partly yellow, partly, ugh, brown! Just as if he had eaten too much candy and sugar throughout his childhood, which must have been really traumatizing. His belly stuck out of his tunic like a half blown out balloon; she was sure the god of Druids was sick and had water just flooding around his pancreas, stomach, and whatever else was there; because as he moved his belly made watery movements along with his legs which seemed to be made out of plastic. Or like a kid that had put lots of water in his neoprene and was now acting as if he was a mermaid.

Then, came his hair, she wondered why did she had to think about it, it seemed as if he had just came out of a play where he was a tree, which gave him, overall, a very mature appearance. On the other hand stood a smoking Juno Moneta who tried to control the anger that boiled at 190º C.

- Dagda, - she sighed. – What are you doing in my territory! – Whispers started to run along the lines. Everyone remembered who Felix father was. She could understand that they felt surprised that the great Celtboy had a father like that, let's just hope Felix didn't inherited his father's ugliness.

The god opened his arms in a large gesture.

- You, and your little brats here, invaded my territory in the first place. Rome belongs to me as much as it belongs to you then. Have you forgot that back in my glorious days we… - Here we go again, she thought, rolling her eyes in boredom. - … attacked Rome? Great moment, we controlled the entire Europe! In a more civilised way by the way! Ah, power, so seductive…

- You consider yourself civilised? – Juno scowled. – May I remind you that your protected offered human sacrifices?

- They did, but not to me. And do you find it more civilised to throw slaves in the Arenas with nice looking cats that were willing to tear up their necksfor fun? – He dismissively answered. Then he turned his attention to her, leaning on his deadly club. – So, I didn't know you found me that annoying. – Earth! Eat me right now! Dagda's eyebrows went up.

- Really? Would you like a little help to become a mole?

- No! – She couldn't help screaming, she was sure her face was red by now and her eyes steamed hot. She felt everyone's eyes on her. Lucky them that didn't had to handle that guy all day long. WHY. ME! Dagda smirked again and his entire belly went up, down, up and down again. She wondered if she could pierce it to take out the liquid that was inside. Juno cleared her throat.

- What is the mean of this visit?

- Oh, nothing just wanted to tell you, gods and godlings, that you could count with my support and influence, blah blah blah, plus I had some useful information for you. – Juno opened her mouth replaying. – But! As I see that you're so interested to hear it, I´ll take my lead. – He turned his back at the goddess, sticking out his camel shaped belly, his club sent forward in front of him as a walking stick. – That way, am I wrong?

- Dagda! – Juno growled.

- Yes?

- Tell me what you came to say.

- Excuse me I didn't hear you right, I believe. – The goddess put on her must fake smile ever.

- Would you mind to excuse me for my unacceptable behaviour and accept my excuses in exchange of your information? – Dagda turned imitating perfectly the English rich XIXth century stereotype.

- Hum. – He said rubbing his chin. – I might think about the offer. – Juno glowed with hate.

- DAGDA!

- Yes Hera – I mean, Juno?

- You are crossing the line! Don't ask me to pulverise your son.

- Aw, Romans, they never had a sense of humour. – Dagda mumbled disappointed, turning again to face her. – So about the day that I turned you into a…

- Enough! – Juno intervened. – Tell us what you wanted to say, for once and for all.

- Well, I came under my brother's call, Manannan Mac Lir. Yes! I can't get a shorter nickname, thank you for asking legacy of Janus! – He scowled in direction of a tall boy in the first raw. - To warn you about those nasty, ugly, smelly and naughty merriens, that adore human scent. And that have this wonderful idea of joining my extremely helpful comrade Gorgon. In other words I came to explain why sea monsters as the Leviathan, why that stinky, large, fishy headed sea monster known as the Trojan Monster, are swimming free now on the Pacific ocean with a guy in a chariot chasing around out of breath. – He took a big, noisy breath. Without losing that huge, fake and horrible, very didactic, smile over his face. He turned to look at them. – And that's how, nenes, you get in trouble in the immortal world for something you haven't done. – What? Can anyone explain us better what's going on?

- It is Neptune that was meant to guard them under the sea! – Juno growled. – Don't accuse us… - Dagda shrugged away her exclamation.

- Yes, he does. But I would like to see you keeping the seas controlled with a few thousands little capped monsters that keep cutting off your wings, which helps you a lot. The problem is, I agree, that Neptune is way too proud to accept that mere Irish mermaids have been messing with him. – He sighed as he shook his head, looking at them with a motherly like look. – Roman gods, they're all the same. They're all… - Juno coughed making some of them chuckle at Dagda's expression. He then smiled again and flashed out of view. He reappeared next to Jason as that horrible blue-greyish ogre covered with jewellery. Well, at least that hid that rounded pregnant like belly as he only wore a ridiculous loincloth. Jason, him, oh poor boy, tried to remove the arm of the god that was put over his shoulders. – See nenes, here is a great example of the big ego of the gods. Me included. – He slammed a hand on Jason's abdomen. – You know what I mean? – He asked looking around and winking at Juno who started glowing with rage. He then turned to Jason, who looked quite disgusted. – See nene, because your dad and your mum loved each other a lot. Your dad…em, gave to your mother a seed. That seed germinated… grew… and grew, a… and after nine months became…eh, a little mushroom that grew against the roots of your mother's tree. – Jason tried to move away but Dagda made him spin around so he was against his shoulder. – But… as you might know, your dad loves to see… new well-shaped younger girls. – Juno now looked like a locomotive about to explode. – And so… ergh… his wife, an old cock if you want my point of view, came up to him and said: "Mira nene! – He screamed imitating Juno's voice. – If you don't give me your so I'll pulverise you!" – He then looked at his audience again with that disturbingly dirty, didactic smile. – And that's how Jason Grace, son of Jupiter became the mushroom on Juno's, the peacock, salad. – He turned again to Juno with that smile still in his thin lips. – A los chicos siempre se debe decirles la verdad. (You always have to tell the truth to children). – He chuckled alone, as everyone tried to understand. Nina turned to look at Jason; the boy was white and seemed to be ready to throw up at any minute. He looked at her, his icy blue eyes screaming for help.

Dagda took his arm away from his shoulders and patted his back in a friendly way.

- Don't worry son, probably she won't atomize you. That's good, no?

- Dagda leave. – Juno's face seemed to have been done on ice, unreadable, so distant and cold. But her eyes, oh dear, those were steaming hot like two little black suns. – You are done here I believe. – He shrugged looking back at Jason.

- Yes I think. But I'm sure you've got many other things to discuss, no? – Juno's temper flared.

- Just abandon this camp. You have already got what you wanted. – Dagda smirked triumphally. His form shimmered becoming a tall good looking man, dressed as a magician with black elegant clothes and a black walking stick, milky skin, and deep red eyes that shone along with that long brown hair. He bowed theatrically at all them and disappeared as if the wind had picked him up. Juno turned, looking at the sea of godlings. – Forget what Dagda has said. – She sounded convincing, but Nina doubted that she was going to pull away Dagda's magic and influence. He had already left a mark in all them, they were always going to remember the god that had revealed who was the patron of Jason and who had ridiculed Juno Moneta in front of her entire army.

- What was true? – She asked crossing her arms. – Did you really ask Jason's life in exchange of peace between Lord Jupiter and you? – The goddess glared at her with so much hate that she made an effort to hold that flaming view. – I don't want to upset you. I just want to know the truth. And – she glanced at Jason. – I don't think that I'm the only one. – Nina tried to sound calming and sincere. Juno growled silently, her right hand trembled lightly.

- Sadly, everything. Now. – She turned to all of her audience. – As you have heard, sea monsters are again free and alive, running in the Ocean getting closer to this bay. I believe my brother, Neptune, is slowing them down but our enemies, the Titans, are quite interested in this current situation to use it in their advantage. Get ready to fight well, demigods. Quests will have to be taken soon.

I know quite an awful end I just didn't knew how to close it.

Juno doesn't sound really real right?

Sorry for that .

Thanks for reading and please review.