A/N: okay, so I've been looking through my author's notes lately and noticed I haven't been very good at picking songs and stuff, so I've tried my best at finding one for this one! I'm SO sorry, like EVERY song is about dating and stuff, and this story isn't exactly about that.

Songs for this chapter: "No Grave" by Newsboys (this will come up again!)

"Save You" by Kelly Clarkson

I gagged and Ponyboy looked stunned, almost dropping his hot-fudge sundae. "Cherry?" we asked together. "The Soc?"

"Yeah. She came over to the vacant lot the night Two-Bit was jumped. Shepard and some of his outfit and us were hanging around there when she drives up in her little ol' Sting Ray. That took a lot of nerve. Some of us was for jumping her then and there, but Two-Bit stopped us." Dally explained, then added "Man, next time I want a broad, I'll pick up my own kind."

"Yeah," I said slowly, remembering another deep voice, one that I recognised, saying 'Next time you want a broad, pick up your own kind…'

I nearly jumped at the sound of Dally's voice continuing: "She said she felt that the whole mess was her fault, which it is, and that she'd keep up with what was comin' of with the Socs in the rumble and would testify that the Socs were drunk and looking for a fight and that you fought back in self-defense." He laughed grimly before continuing. "That little gal sure does hate me. I offered to take her over to The Dingo for a Coke and she said 'No, thank you' and told me where I could go in very polite terms." He paused as he observed the scene. "Man, this place is out of it. What do they do for kicks around here, play checkers? I ain't never been in the country before. Have you two?"

I shook my head as Pony answered. "Dad used to take us all huntin'. I've been in the country before. How'd you know about the church?"

I looked at Dallas curiously, as I wanted to know the answer to that last question. "I got a cousin that lives around here somewheres. Tipped me off what it'd make a tuff hide-out in case of something. Hey, Ponyboy, I heard you was the best shot in the family."

"Yeah," he answered. "Darry always got the most ducks, though. Him and Dad. Soda and I goofed around too much, scared most of our game away."

"That was a good idea, I mean cuttin' your hair and bleachin' it. They printed your descriptions in the paper, but you sure wouldn't fit 'em now."

Dally paused, and I knew this would be the perfect time to tell him that I'd thought of turnin' myself in. I knew I had to get it over with, and I didn't want to live in an abandoned church my entire life, but gosh, my heart leaped up to my throat and was pounding, I was startin' to sweat, and a knot formed in my stomach. But, I finally spat the words out; "We're goin' back and turn ourselves in."

Dally took his turn of gagging, and when he was done, he swore, then turned to me and nearly yelled "What?"

"I said we're goin' back and turn ourselves in," I repeated quietly. "I got a good chance of bein' let off easy," I started explaining, trying to get him, and myself, convinced. "I ain't got no record with the fuzz and it was self-defense. Ponyboy and Cherry can testify to that. And I don't aim to stay in that church all my life." As I said that, my eyes grew wider as my fear of cops grew, but I had to continue. "We won't tell that you helped us, Dally, and we'll give you back the gun and what's left of the money and say we hitchhiked back so you won't get into trouble. Okay?"

I saw that Dally was busy destroying the corner on his ID card in his mouth, the card he used to buy liquor that showed his fake age of twenty-one. "You sure you want to go back? Us greasers get it worse than anyone else."

I nodded. "I'm sure. It ain't fair for Ponyboy to have to stay up in that church with Darry and Soda worryin' about him all the time. I don't guess…" – I swallowed as I tried my best not to look eager – "I don't guess my parents are worried about me or anything?"

"The boys are worried," Dally replied matter-of-factly. "Two-Bit was going to Texas to hunt for you."

"My parents," I repeated, determined to get an answer, "did they ask about me?"

"No, they didn't." Dally snapped. "Blast it, Johnny, what do they matter? Shoot, my old man don't give a hang whether I'm in jail or dead in a car wreck or drunk in the gutter. That don't bother me none."

I could only stare at the dashboard after he said that. It was already bad enough for me if any of the gang got mad at me, but if it was Dallas… well, let's just say being mad at by your hero really hurts.

I don't know how to explain it, and I don't know why, but sometimes I really care for my parents, even though my dad does hit me all the time and my mother doesn't care, but you know, they're your parents. What would you do if your parents didn't love you? What would you want if you were abused? All I'd ever wanted was to be loved, and not only by friends, but by family, too. Now, because of them, my closest family was the gang. Darry, Soda, Ponyboy, Two-Bit, Dallas and Steve. They're all I have… all I've ever had. Don't get me wrong; I love the gang, but you know, they're just not real family. Sometimes, just thinking about it makes me want to cry.

I was still staring at the dashboard when Dally vroomed the car to a start as he cussed under his breath. All I could think about was his anger and my selfish parents, the parents who had nearly abused me to death in my childhood. The parents who hated me. The parents who'd somehow taught me to hide my emotions, to get tough.

I was still thinking about these things when Dallas started growling at me. "Blast it, Johnny, why didn't you think of turning yourself in five days ago? It would have saved a lot of trouble."

"I was scared." I admitted. "I still am." I added as I ran my index finger down one of my short black sideburns. "I guess we ruined our hair for nothing, Ponyboy." I said as I turned my head slightly to look at him in the back seat.

"I guess so." He replied.

I noticed Dally scowling most of the way, and I remembered how no one, and I mean no one, messed with him. Not even proud-of-his-muscles Darry, which was big. Darry could take almost anything, anything, but he couldn't take Dallas. No one can. A memory came back to me of when he was at a dime store and a guy told him to move. I remembered he knocked a tooth out. And how he was a complete stranger. I was scared to death in that car, staring at my feet with him being mad at me; I don't know about you, but I like having my teeth kept in place.

In mid-scowl, Dally paused for a moment. I almost looked up when he started talking. "Johnny," he started in a high voice no one had ever heard from him, "Johnny, I ain't mad at you. I just don't want you to get hurt. You don't know what a few months in jail can do to you. Oh, blast it, Johnny" – he paused again as I heard his hand lifting to brush his hair back – "you get hardened in jail. I don't want that to happen to you. Like it happened to me…"

With my eyes glued to my feet, they started growing wider and wider as he said that. This was huge; Dally only ever talked about jail to brag, and he never really seemed to care about anyone this way. He only cared for himself. But then, I thought about my own childhood… how hard it had seemed to be… and realised how his must've been even harder, with jail on top of parents not even caring about you, ignoring you. Sure, I had been beaten a couple of times, but what was that compared to being jailed at such an early age, ten years old. He practically grew up on the streets. And then I realised there was more to Dally. There was more to him than being a hoodlum, there was more to him than being drunk or jailed or anything like that. There was so much more…

But, he was telling me to stay on the run. I couldn't do that; it was already killing me enough to be on the run for a week, how could I live my entire life like that? I didn't want to live in some run-down church with no beds, blankets, kitchen, radio, friends… no friends. Ponyboy would have to eventually go back, since he didn't do anything but almost be murdered. I'd killed a guy; I'd obviously only had two choices. Either I could stay on the run for my entire life, or I could turn myself in and get it over with. I needed to be with the gang again… I missed them terribly. So I asked Dally a very serious question…

"Would you rather have me living on hide-outs for the rest of my life, always on the run?"

Dally was about to answer when I realised I'd asked too late; there was something going on… I could smell something… and I could've sworn it was…

Fire.

I looked up when Dally slammed the breaks suddenly and stared at something. "Oh, glory!" he whispered to himself. And I saw it. I was right; the church was in flames.

"Let's go see what the deal is," Ponyboy suggested as he hopped out of the car. I followed as Dally started demanding us to come back, but I hardly heard him as I followed Pony, who was running to the closet grownup. "What's going on?" he asked the man urgently.

"Well, we don't know for sure," the man explained with a grin. "We were having a school picnic up here and the first thing we knew, the place is burning up. Thank goodness this is wet season and the old thing is worthless anyway." After he was done, he shouted to the kids, warning them to step back and telling them the firemen would come soon.

"I bet we started it," Pony told me. "We must have dropped a lighted cigarette or something."

While he said that, a nervous looking woman ran up to the man we talked to. "Jerry, some of the kids are missing."

"They're probably around here somewhere. You can't tell with all this excitement where they might be." He assured her calmly.

"No." she argued as she shook her head. "They've been missing for at least a half an hour. I thought they were climbing the hill…"

Then, when she finished, we froze. We could all just faintly hear some kids yelling. The sounds were coming from inside the church.

The woman turned pale. "I told them not to play in the church… I told them…" she looked like she was going to freak out, and I guess the Jerry guy noticed that, because he started shaking her.

"I'll get them, don't worry!" Ponyboy suddenly said as he bolted for the church, but Jerry grabbed his arm. "I'll get them, you kids stay out."

Pony jerked his arm free and continued running, and I followed after him. My heart was pounding in my chest and I was sweating, and it wasn't from the heat. I was afraid it might've been one of my cigarettes. I had essential fear that I wasn't careful enough, that I didn't watch out.

I followed Pony to a window, which he smashed open with a huge rock, and he pulled himself inside.

"Hey, Ponyboy." I called.

He turned around, surprised I'd followed him all that way. He took a deep breath, but started coughing like crazy. "Is that guy coming?" he managed.

I shook my head and said "The window stopped him."

"Too scared?"

"Naw…" I cracked a grin as I remembered what happened. "Too fat." When he only coughed, I asked "Where's the kids?"

"In the back, I guess." He replied, and we started walking through the flames. It was weird; I'd been beaten and bruised by my dad and by Socs, and I'd always hated it. Yet, I didn't hate this. In fact, this was the best time I'd ever had in my life. I was having fun. It seemed crazy; who had fun being in the middle of a church that's about to collapse on top of you any second? I guess it's just another thing that's different about me, as Ponyboy had said.

We pushed the door to the back room open and discovered about four or five young kids, maybe eight years or younger, all huddled in a corner. One was screaming like heck, so I yelled "Shut up! We're goin' to get you out!" he looked surprised, but quit screaming. I looked over my shoulder and saw the door was inaccessible from flames, then pushed the window open and tossed out the closest kid. When I looked up, Pony was looking at me, a surprised look on his face, and I grinned at him. He promptly picked up a kid, and the kid bit him, but he dropped the kid out anyway, being as careful as he could in a rushed time like that. The next time I looked out the window, I saw there was a crowd surrounding the window, Dally yelling at us. "For Pete's sake, get outa there! That roof's gonna cave in any minute. Forget those blasted kids!" I hardly heard him over the crackling of the wood and the roof coming close to our heads. While I got another kid out, I noticed Pony was coughing so hard he could hardly stand up. When we dropped the last kids out, the church started crumbling. I remembered Pony coughing too hard to stand up and thought he should go out first, just in case; I was worried about him, I wanted him to live. He was only fourteen, and he had way more potential than a guy like me, a guy who hardly even knew how to read. So, I shoved him towards the window and yelled "Get out!" over the crumbling of the church.

He promptly leaped out the window, right on time. I looked up and saw the roof getting closer and closer, the heat becoming more intense by the second, until…

Until the last thing I remembered was a hot, burning object making contact with my back.

A/N: Hope you guys liked it! It might take a while for me to update again because I'm gonna get exams soon and I don't know what to do yet for when he wakes up, so don't expect for chapter 8 to come for a while. Until then, please remember to keep those awesome reviews coming!