Tread Lightly

(Edmund)

I saw them kiss, and so their happily ever after began. I knew from the moment I saw them together that they had found it. When Peter was chasing after Rhiannon and Susan was deciding between suitors and I was searching for something I could never quite understand, Lucy was waiting. Now I saw that Aslan had rewarded her patience. I didn't think she knew yet, and I was fairly certain Caspian couldn't quite fathom the depth of his feelings, but I could see Lucy had what the rest of us were only grasping for. Perhaps Peter came closest, but his love didn't stick.

Then, when I was about to turn to my study for a night of cold rumination, Dara's servant came to say that Lucy needed me. I wondered how she could need me now of all moments, and I followed to find Lucy not in Caspian's company, but in Dara's. When she told me she was worried that I wouldn't approve I was so touched I had to hug her. Anyone else would have become instantly absorbed, but she was worried about me. What's more, after I had reassured her I ran into Caspian, who was looking for me.

"Did you talk to Lucy? She's in a state worried about what you might say," he said with a frown.

I laughed. "I can't see why you both are so concerned about me right now. Oughtn't you to be reciting sonnets to each other by moonlight or something?"

"Well, you know Lucy…"

I shook my head. "I talked to her—she's fine. Go to her. I can hardly believe you waited as long as you did to do anything."

Caspian looked at the ground. "Having the permission to say something is one thing. Actually saying it is another. I'm a warrior and a king; I don't have much practice with declarations of love."

This made me like Caspian all the better, particularly because it sounded like something Peter would say. I left him in the hallway, smiling to myself as I returned to my study. Really there couldn't be anyone better for Lucy. If Peter were here, he would have to agree.

Of course, that left us with the problem of Galma, but as I settled myself in the study, I resolved that this would not be a problem. Peter and I had decided ages before that when Susan and Lucy chose worthy suitors we would defend their right to be happy at all costs. Wensted could bluster and Renna could whine, but I would not cede Lucy's happiness to them. Well, Peter would certainly be proud of me now. That's just what he would say, isn't it?

I went to Caspian's chambers the next morning before breakfast. "So," I asked him, "Is it happily ever after now?"

He grinned the smile that Lucy told me once reminded her of a little boy. "Edmund, thank you," he said, and he embraced me.

"Alright!" I cried with a laugh. "You understand why I made you wait?"

He nodded. "I just don't understand why you gave in all of a sudden. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. But I thought you were resolved—not until she was eighteen."

"I was. I suppose you have Eustace to thank. He's not altogether stupid; he saw which was the wind was blowing between you two. And he saw what I could not—that Lucy was falling in love with you. I didn't want to believe it was so soon, but she couldn't help it." I paused, and frowned a little. "You understand that Lucy's happiness is more important to me than anything."

"Yes—me too," he said fervently.

"Well then, I couldn't very well let her be unhappy for no reason. I saw that you could take care of her. I knew that she loved you. Knowing that, the decision was simple."

"Edmund, if I could only tell you how—"

I held up my hand. "That's all very well, but you do realize that we've got some more unpleasant things to do. We must be clear with Renna. And of course, her father will be returning before the new year."

Caspian knit his brows together. "Yes, I suppose we must sit down with her. We'll do that after breakfast; there's no point in waiting." He looked at me with troubled eyes. "Do you suppose she really loved me? I never wanted to hurt her."

"I cannot claim to know her heart," I said evasively. Frankly I didn't care whether she did or not; I was sick of her peevish nature and constant superior sniffing.

After breakfast Caspian and I settled ourselves in chambers, and I sent the servant to call for Renna. The door opened far sooner than I expected, but it revealed Lucy. "You're going to tell her, aren't you?" she asked.

"Yes," I said bluntly, while Caspian demurred. "Lucy, dear, you don't want to be here."

She frowned. "That's nonsense, Caspian. If you take Edmund into chambers, you take me. I am an ancient Queen of this country."

"But—"

"What, now that you love me you're going to cloister me? You know me better than that. I stay. Not as your—lover, but as Queen."

Caspian was sufficiently cowed by this speech, and I chuckled. There were many things about this new pair that were amusing: Lucy's old assertiveness that she used so often with Peter and Susan and me, her use of the word "lover" as if she really knew something about it. I could see these two were as yet children in that respect, but I thought their innocence was charming.

Lucy settled herself into a chair without any further ado, and we sat for a few minutes staring at each other. None of us spoke, but I'm fairly certain we were all wondering how Renna would react. The silence grew, and Caspian and Lucy's discomfort became more protracted. Privately I was glad to dispatch with Renna, and while I had every intention of doing so diplomatically, I was very pleased to rid the castle of her pretensions and her arrogance. Eustace can feel sorry for her all she wants, but I have little sympathy for someone who is so blatantly manipulative. Caspian and Lucy, of course, were tender-hearted individuals, and though I knew Caspian in particular had had enough of Renna he hated to be the reason for anyone's misery. Lucy just hated to see anyone in pain. At length she murmured "I thought it would be more like a dream than this."

Caspian redeemed himself from his earlier presumptions by taking her hand and saying "This is just to remind us we're not dreaming."

She gave him such a smile that in that moment I thought her just as pretty as Susan. Caspian was enchanted, naturally, and Renna unfortunately chose this moment to enter the room. I got to my feet and Caspian, seeing my movement out of the corner of his eye, followed suit.

She curtseyed. "My lords—and lady," she said squinting suspiciously, "You have called me to chambers. Why?"

Caspian cleared his throat. "Renna, you'd better have a seat." He gestured to the only open chair at the table.

"But why is Lord Eustace not here?" she demurred, walking over. "Is he not your kinsman? Should he not be included in council?"

"This is a matter for the monarchs," I replied directly. I was not going to let her marshal allies or play on Caspian's sympathies. "Please, sit."

"Would you care for some tea?" Lucy asked hospitably, though her face was anxious.

Renna merely glared at her.

"We have called you here this morning to discuss the purpose of your visit," I said, cutting through this exchange.

She swallowed and looked so nervous I actually did feel a little sorry for her then. She grew so pale that all the freckles stood out on her cheeks in relief.

I thought it best to get it over with as quickly as possible. "As you well know, you have been a guest of the Narnian court—" I began, but Caspian cut across me.

"Renna, you know why you're here. We all know." He shot me a significant look. "You and I have spent the past months getting to know each other."

"Yes," she said slowly.

"I respect you too much to be anything less than honest with you. You're a wonderful person, but I cannot marry you. My heart belongs to another."

Here Renna made a last ditch effort. She reached out and took Caspian's hand. "Are you sure? We could get on very well together, Caspian, and it would be so good not only for ourselves, but for our nations."

I noticed the corners of Lucy's mouth tighten, but she remained otherwise impassive. Caspian had the grace not to look at her, which I admired him for. "I'm quite sure, Renna," he said gently but very definitely.

Instantly Renna withdrew her hand and sat up in her chair. She turned to Lucy with a look of cold fury. "You did this! This is your fault!"

"I didn't do anything!" Lucy protested.

"You did it just so I couldn't have him. You didn't love him before. I don't even think you love him now, you just don't want me to have him. Else why would you have waited so long? Why not have shown jealousy? Why not have spoken to Caspian when you knew that my betrothal to him was proposed? You are merely getting back at me for the other night." Renna's chest rose and fell deeply with her words. She was taking long breaths so as not to cry.

"It is not in my sister's nature to show jealousy," I said.

"Supposing you are right—and I think you give your sister too much credit, King Edmund—why not have said something to Caspian before? I know that you didn't love him when I came."

Her foolish trick worked. Now Caspian's eyes were trained on Lucy, searching her face for an answer. Lucy looked between them. "I didn't know," she whispered. "I didn't know how I felt."

"Is that really love, then? Wouldn't you have known all along?" I nearly got up and boxed her ear, but I felt Peter behind me, shaking his head. Still, that Caspian listened to her, that he doubted Lucy—it was enough to make me ignore all the lessons I had taught myself in keeping my temper. Meanwhile, Renna seized her moment and turned to Caspian. "Perhaps you do not love me, but I can make you happy. Do not trust her. Even if she deigns to stay with you, could she not be torn from you at any moment? I have been here long enough to hear all the stories of her visits to this world, her abrupt departures. Wouldn't you do better to stay with someone who can give you a lifetime instead of a few fleeting moments?"

Now I was closer to punching Caspian. He knew we had no choice in when we stayed or went, and yet he looked as though Lucy really might consider abandoning him. He said nothing and stared at the table with troubled eyes and a partially open mouth, like a slackjawed idiot. I knew the wounded look on Lucy's face without even so much as glancing at her, and I surmised that she was probably crying. "Caspian!" Lucy said, and now I did look at her, and so did Caspian. There were tears running down her cheeks.

He asked the foolish question with his eyes. "I wouldn't ever leave if I could help it," she said. "I have to obey Aslan."

"And what if he calls you tomorrow?" Caspian asked.

"What if he does?" I asked, finally able to check myself no longer. "I thought you would have waited half a lifetime for a moment with Lucy, or so you said in your suits to me for the past three years."

Lucy got up and knelt before him. She reached out to touch his cheek. "I can't make any promises, but I think I will be here for awhile. Don't give up on me just yet."

"I'm a fool," Caspian breathed, and he would have kissed her had not Renna said sharply "Three years? That well predates my arrival here."

The lovers came back to themselves. Lucy returned to her seat and I nearly smacked myself on the forehead. In my anger at Caspian I had revealed the one thing I wasn't supposed to tell. Caspian shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"You lied to me," Renna pressed. "You let me make a fool of myself, thinking I had some chance at happiness. You spent your hours with me, courting me—"

"I didn't, Renna. I was only trying to be kind," Caspian rushed to defend himself.

"Your kindness is cruel, though. You used your charm. You deceived a lady, and if that is how a knight of Narnia behaves, I confess I do not think well of your customs of chivalry."

Her eloquence checked my anger a little. She is no fool. She has her father's sharp eye, and in all their hours together she has spotted Caspian's weaknesses. She had us all tricked with her simpering loquaciousness. Damn! I was watching Caspian; I should have been watching Renna.

She went for the final blow. "Did your High King set this precedent of manner?"

Lucy and Caspian protested at once. "Don't talk about Peter that way," she said fiercely. He was quieter. "The High King was a model of honor, and if I have not lived up to his standard, that is my own fault."

Now she turned her sharp eyes to me. "And you, King Edmund? Don't you want to defend your peerless brother?"

"Do not trick us by using Peter. I can see what you are doing. Let us be plain, and open. Caspian and Lucy are feeling people, and you're using that against us. I have no such sympathies."

"No, I don't suppose you do." When she squinted like that, her eyes were beady. "You aren't a very feeling person, or else you would have considered me when making your deals with my father." I didn't take her bait and answer, but she went on anyway. "If you knew Caspian was in love with Lucy, why did you let me stay on? Why didn't you refuse him outright?"

"His suit was not open. It would look like an insult."

"So it is unacceptable to insult Galma, but you can keep me here as a worthless toy in your diplomatic schemes? If you knew, the courteous thing to do, the right thing to do would be to find a way to refuse my father. Surely with your skill, your renowned judgment, you could have found a way? Instead, you let me stay on believing that I might well be married to a fine and handsome king, a man beyond my wildest dreams. Surely your brother would say it's improper to use a lady in this way, if he is the model of honor Caspian says. You are an unfeeling person who treats people as pawns. What will you do when you find out all your maneuvering was for naught? When my father arrives, he will be more livid than before. All you have done is allowed the king to indulge his dalliances."

I reeled a little. This was a sharp blow, that I had saved nothing, that I had put Caspian and Lucy, and, though I hated her now, Renna through all of this when I could have said no at the start and simply gotten the same result. I tried to cast my mind back to Wensted's visit. Why did I want to stall for time? Certainly I didn't think Caspian might grow to love Renna; he's loved Lucy for so long. I remembered Wensted's visit and his sharpness, all he knew of Narnia and our plans and our allies, and I started to feel sick.

"Renna, this is enough," Lucy said sternly. I looked to her at once; she never spoke like that. "What are you trying to do? Nothing you say will change things. Caspian loves me. I am sorry that you have been brought here for nothing, and I'm sorry that you've been hurt. That was never our intent. But he will not change his mind to make you feel better. Edmund will not force him to marry you; Narnia has never used marriage as a bargaining tool, and this began—and continues with—with my brothers. Stop now, and leave with a little grace. I beg of you."

Caspian's eyebrows shot up, and I think he would have given a low whistle had he not been seated at a table in chambers.

"So you presume to know Caspian's mind and heart? You are sure how he feels about me, even after all the hours we spent alone together? He's a man, you know, a man in the bloom of youth. You don't know what we did."

Caspian's jaw dropped and he moved to speak, but all he could make was a strangled sort of grunt. Lucy looked Renna directly in her eyes and said "I know Caspian. I know his mind and his heart. Even if I didn't, I have faith in him, and I know that he would never betray me in that way. You cannot convince me to doubt. No one ever has."

Finally Renna seemed to realize that nothing would change. She squeezed her eyes shut to will away the tears and she got up. "My father arrives in the New Year. We shall see what he has to say about my poor treatment at the Narnian court. In the meantime, I cannot stay in this castle another minute."

"We will provide you with a place to stay," Caspian answered. "I will send someone to take you there this afternoon."

Renna gave him one long, disdainful look and swept out of the room. I watched after her a moment thinking that Lucy had begged her to leave with grace, but she had so little to start with this was impossible. When I turned back to them to share this thought, Caspian had caught Lucy in his arms. He seemed unable to speak his mind, but Lucy smiled up at him anyway. "I wasn't going to let her poison my mind. I know you, Caspian. She, apparently, does not."

He kissed her then. I knew this was no longer a place for me, so I went to the Chamber of Instruments. I needed to do something with my hands.

After Renna left in her small huff, Lucy's laugh was the sound that prevailed throughout the castle that Christmas. She was so happy, and she was full of nothing but warmth and charity for everyone. I found it easy to enjoy the preparations even with a wayward choir to conduct, because she infected everyone with such mirth. That has always been Lucy's role. Susan soothed and Lucy brought joy, and somewhere along the way Peter and I had made the tacit agreement that we would fight with our lives so they could be free to do that. Now Peter was gone, but I watched Caspian closely and I began to wonder if I couldn't make the same sort of agreement with him.

Whenever his eyes alighted on Lucy, his whole face started to glow. I had been so busy fending him off I never realized just how much he loved her. I didn't let myself because I didn't want to be swayed by my friendship. But now that I no longer had to blind myself to that I saw how he admired her as well as loved her. He seemed content just to have permission to feel openly. When Susan or Peter or I had relationships, we sought out the corners and darker passages of the castle. Lucy and Caspian rarely cloistered themselves. They spent many hours in the company of others, either Eustace and me, or Drinian and Dara, or some courtier or another, and they never seemed to yearn to be alone. If I went looking for Lucy, it wasn't a given that I would find her in Caspian's company. I wondered at the balance of their relationship, but I couldn't help but ask myself when they would become consumed with each other.

There was one evening when I found them together. A couple of days before Christmas I dismissed the choir early and headed out to find out how my present for Lucy was coming along. I had been digging through the treasure room one afternoon and had come across the necklace that Cor had given her when he paid his first state visit to Cair Paravel. The necklace was mostly intact, but the chain was broken and a couple of the jewels had been knocked out, so I had sent it to the dwarves of the castle to be mended. As I passed through the halls, I heard the bell-like sound of Lucy's laughter. A moment after, Caspian's laughter struck a harmonious chord, and I smiled to myself. I was rather surprised, though, when I turned a corner and came across them.

I had been walking quietly; they didn't hear. She was perched on his knee, dangling an ornament before him. "Caspian," she chided, "You aren't looking. You asked me to tell you all the stories of old Christmases, and when I show you the dent Aravis made in this star when she threw it at Cor, you don't pay attention. Look at the ornament."

Caspian smiled, and I have to say it was rather smarmy. "I'm looking at the ornament on my knee; she's far more distracting."

Lucy made a sound halfway between a laugh and an indignant gasp. She gave him a push and said with a merry mouth but fiery eyes "Do not call me an ornament again, sir!" She wasn't the type to yell, but there was a note to her voice which, though she tried to keep it light, showed she was very serious about not being called an ornament. I heartily agreed but hardly thought I needed to rush to Lucy's aid. Caspian flinched, and I knew why. I had been on the receiving end of one of Lucy's "playful" pushes before. When she was indignant, she could be fierce. He saw the look in her eyes and he bowed his head. Being Lucy, she was also forgiving. When she saw that Caspian was sufficiently contrite, she laughed and kissed his nose. "Now, listen like a good boy. After all, aren't these the stories that you yearned for as a child but Miraz forbade your nurse to tell you?"

He wound his arms around her waist and pulled her close. "Yes," he murmured, resting his head on her shoulder. It was then that she stroked his cheek along the jawline and kissed him.

It's not that I hadn't seen Lucy kiss anyone before. Even she had indulged in her share of flirtations during her reign. The slightest suggestion of any of his siblings and sex was enough to make Peter squirm, but I prided myself on taking a far more realistic view of the situation. I knew they all had desires, even Peter. Even Lucy, the innocent.

The trouble was that the kiss I witnessed was not a kiss of desire. He didn't move to possess her; she didn't cling to him. He gave her something in that kiss, but it wasn't anything definable or anything I could quantify in any practical way. I didn't understand how a kiss could be so deep and yet so innocent. He asked for nothing more than to hold her. She asked for nothing more than to be in his arms. Maybe that's what love is then.

I didn't watch them anymore. I continued on my way, but the picture of them together stayed with me.

I used to think I was jealous of Lucy. Who wouldn't be, when Caspian is so charming and warm. And, if I'm being frank, handsome. Now I'm seeing them together, though, and I realize it's not that I want Caspian. I'm jealous of him. Since we arrived on the Dawn Treader without Peter and Susan, we had to be everything to each other, Lucy and I. In the spirit of being honest, in this Narnian life she is my best friend. If she goes off and falls in love, where does that leave me? This would be the time to take a lover, since they usually help with that gnawing loneliness, but I really don't know what Caspian would say about my choices. I sighed. This is a bad sign. I'm growing as serious as Peter.

These thoughts stuck to me until Christmas morning. The night before had been the Christmas feast, and every one in Narnia showed up to sing and dance and eat. Eustace started out on mead with a bad first experience, but that Christmas Eve proved he had learned to make his peace with the drink, and he got into a drinking game with a bull because Peepiceek had said he couldn't hold his liquor. I don't expect him up anytime soon. The choir came together in the end, and everyone joined in the caroling till the Great Hall seemed to swell with the joyous sound.

Caspian was courteous as ever, offering dances to most of the noble women, but when he took Lucy in his arms for their first dance of the evening, all the assembled guests knew. I heard the murmurs all around me. The old Narnians were pleased, and I even heard Trufflehunter say "The Queen Lucy is a good match for him. It's only fitting, since he revived Old Narnia, that he has fallen in love with a Queen of the Golden Age."

Even the new Narnians were satisfied, at least, those that didn't have hopes of marrying off their daughters to the king. And then, even some of these shrugged and turned their eyes to me, which only cause me to smirk.

I expected to be quite alone in the breakfast room since it was still rather early, but when I entered Lucy beamed at me. "Merry Christmas, Edmund!" she cried, and she ran to kiss me on the cheek.

"What are you doing up?" I asked.

"I've been up for hours!" she answered, still beaming. "Who could sleep on Christmas morning?"

The corners of my mouth tugged upwards involuntarily. "Everyone else, apparently," I said.

She laughed. "I suppose we'll have to wait for them for breakfast," she sighed.

My stomach rumbled. "I suppose so. Can't we scrounge up something, though?"

She looked at me sidewise. "After all the food you ate last night? It's a wonder you're not fat." She pulled a package from the pile at the center of the table. "Here. Why don't you open your present? That ought to distract you."

I grinned and sat next to her as I started to undo the ribbons. She watched me eagerly. I unwrapped a gilt-stamped book which turned to be music for all the songs we had sung during our reign. All the lyrics and notes were written in very fine calligraphy, and the margins had extraordinary illuminations which either detailed what the song was about or the occasions on which we sang it. On every page I could see miniature pictures of Peter and Susan and Aslan. I turned the pages in wonder.

"It took me ever so long to have this finished. I've been working on it since we got back on the Dawn Treader. Do you remember when you sang the battle song on deck? That's what gave me the idea. When we got back I started writing down all the songs I remembered. Then I had to see if anyone remembered the tunes, and if they didn't, I had to find a musician who could transcribe the tune. Then I could finally get the work done on all the illuminations."

"That's an awful lot of work for one book," I said dubiously, bending to examine one of the pages more closely.

She leaned over the table to peer at the book. "Don't you think it was worth it, though?"

"Yes," I said at once. "Thank you, Lucy."

She beamed at me. "I'm glad you like it."

"I ought to give you yours, I said, searching my pockets for the small package. "It didn't take three years, but there you are anyway."

She opened the box and gasped. "Oh, Edmund! Where did you find this?"

"I was in the treasure chamber one day and I saw it on the floor. I remember when Cor gave it to you."

"To thank us for the Defense of Anvard," she murmured, fingering the necklace. "Do you remember the battle?"

I snickered. "The wrath of Tash falls from above!"

She laughed so hard she had to wipe her eyes. "I shouldn't laugh, but oh! He looked so funny struggling on that hook."

"He looked even funnier as an ass," I retorted. Lucy gave me a reproving look, which was difficult as there was still mirth in her eyes. "Come on, Lu. I'm being kind to him considering what he would have done to Susan. Thank God she had the sense to see through him. I hate to think of what might have happened if she had consented to marry him. She would have been so miserable."

Lucy covered my hand with hers. "Is that why you were so worried about Caspian?"

"In a way. The major difference is that I don't see Caspian as an ass," I chuckled a little. "Still, he's got that temper, and he's so young in so many ways—"

"Goodness, Edmund! I'm not so besotted that I can't see his faults! I know he can have a bit of a temper and all that. He's not perfect, but I love him anyway."

"That's what I was afraid of. That you'd attach yourself to him too quickly."

She sighed and was quiet for a minute. Two little lines appeared across her forehead, like Peter gets when he's thinking. Finally she said "I think you're trying too hard to be like Peter."

"Really?"

"It's true," she pronounced. "When we were here before with Peter, you never stood in my way for anything. You argued with Peter that I should be able to ride to battle with the archers. You invited me to come on adventures. With Peter I always had to ask, sometimes beg." She lowered her eyes thoughtfully. "You and I, Ed, we've always gone on adventures together." She held up the locket. "We were together at the Defense of Anvard. We were together at the end of the world. We were the first two to discover Narnia." My cheeks started to grow hot, and I would have protested at this if Lucy had not pressed on. "The point is that I've had nearly all my real adventures with you. You know me by now. I'm brave and I'm strong." She came and sat next to me. "Don't you think that if Caspian had spoken to me when I was thirteen I would have told him to wait?"

I screwed up my mouth. "I suppose."

She laughed. "You see? You are trying to be like Peter. Have a little more faith in me. I've never let you down before. And besides, I don't want your protection. I need your love and support."

"You have that," I said, fiddling with my fork. "You're right. You haven't let me down. You are brave. Aslan was right."

"What do you mean?"

"The night Dara and Drinian got married and Wensted came, Aslan appeared to me."

"Me too!" Lucy exclaimed. "He warned me about enemies of Narnia."

"He said something similar to me. But he reminded me that I need to put more faith and trust in you in order to conquer them. I should have done so all along. I'm sorry, Lu."

"It's alright. I understand in a way. But remember—"

She didn't even have to finish. "I'll remember," I promised her. As I did so, a little of the weight on my chest seemed to lift. I started to understand Peter a lot better. You take too much on and it weighs you down.

She got up and put her arms around me. "You're a good brother, Ed," she declared, planting a kiss on top of my forehead.

"Yes, well, there's no need to get all soppy about it," I replied, pushing her off. I looked up and saw Caspian hovering in the doorway. "Go and hug Caspian, will you? He likes it better than me.

Lucy dropped another kiss on my head as a parting blow and ran to Caspian, who grinned and opened his arms. I wished she hadn't gone to him quite so eagerly.

Soon after that Drinian and Dara came down, and even Eustace blundered into the room. There was an exchange of greetings and a few moments of frenzied unwrapping. The haul was pretty good: Caspian got me a new sword, dwarf-wrought, and Eustace managed to dig up a box of parts I needed to finish some repairs in the Chamber of Instruments. Most interesting, however, was Dara and Drinian's gift to Lucy. It was a small book bound in blue, and I recognized it at once as a romance. I thought it was a rather girly and therefore uninteresting gift until Lucy opened the cover and read the title "Ever Evermore: the romance of the High King."

"Do you mean--?" I began to ask, but Lucy had already turned the fly leaf and was reading the first lines:

"In the Golden Age of Narnia, Peter was High King

Ever evermore remembered as High King over all Kings

Reigning from the glittering castle by the sea.

From the East, with hair shot with all the colors of the setting sun

She left the gentle green slopes of our land

To come to him.

Her name was Rhiannon…"

Lucy paused in her reading and looked round at all of us with bright eyes, but her gaze rested on me. "Do you remember, Edmund?" I nodded. Peter's great love had turned him upside-down, but there was a tragic element to their relationship I knew Lucy was not considering. I watched her turn the pages slowly. Her eyes were glowing and she was smiling secretly. At last she understood the part of this tale which had eluded her.

Caspian drew his chair closer to Lucy. "I didn't know your brother had a lady fair," he said lightly, peering over the book.

"Didn't you?" Lucy asked. "She was Dara's ancestor—can't you tell? Dara's hair is—" she consulted her book "'Shot with all the fire of the setting sun.'"

Everyone laughed, and Dara blushed deeply. Drinian reached out a casual hand and stroked her hair. Caspian meanwhile was still interested in the tale. "He never spoke about it," he mused.

"Well that's not really his style, is it?" I commented.

Eustace shrugged, but Caspian frowned. "I don't see why not. I'm half in the mood to draw up royal proclamations declaring I love Queen Lucy. Why shouldn't he want to talk about it?"

Lucy laughed brightly. It was her bell-like laugh alright, but the toss of her head and the way she grazed Caspian's forearm lightly with her fingers was all Susan. I raised an eyebrow.

Caspian took her hand and contemplated it a moment. "I just can't understand. He didn't even try to find out about her when he came back. It seems to me—"

"Well, she'd been dead a thousand years by then. There's really no point—" Eustace observed with his mouth full.

"Stop," I muttered to him alone.

He ignored me and plunged ahead in his folly. "And I'd imagine he was feeling pretty guilty, disappearing like that so suddenly—that is, if he remembered her at all."

"Eustace," I warned again, but Caspian asked at the same moment "What do you mean?"

Of course Eustace can never leave a question unanswered, so he plunged forward. "Well, when we're here we forget that other place, don't we? You know, the world where we came from. Our lives here must fade away when we go back."

Caspian dropped Lucy's hand. "I see," he said in a dazed voice.

Lucy examined his face closely, and then she rose in one graceful movement and looked down at him with a frown. "Caspian, may I speak with you in the antechamber?"

Caspian knew at once he was in for something, and he blanched a little at Lucy's severe tone. She was indeed furious: she had gone very red and she marched before him with quick, clipped strides. He cast me an imploring look over his shoulder, but I merely shrugged. My job was not to coach him through managing Lucy.

She banged the door shut with such force that it rebounded a little, and we could hear some of her yelling. "You doubt me? …love you and will not leave you…playing right into Renna's tricks…" Here Caspian mumbled something which caused Lucy to shout at the top of her voice "And what does Eustace know about it? He's never returned from Narnia!" Caspian made another protest which caused Lucy to cry "I am not my brother! I remember. I hold on, even when it's painful to do so! And what do you know of what Peter has gone through? That you should ever doubt or question me, or my love—" she flung the door open and came toward us, her face flushed and her eyes tear-filled.

Caspian was two steps behind her. "Lucy, wait!" he cried, trying to catch her by the arm.

She shook him off. "Leave me alone."

Apparently he didn't need any coaching. He knew just what to do. He didn't leave her alone but trapped her in his arms and held her fast even when she tried to break free. Once he hand her still enough, he kissed her. She resisted, but only at first. When they were still very close, I saw him whisper to her "I don't doubt you. I couldn't. I doubt the world around us." Lucy wound her arms around his neck and whispered some comfort in his ear, for it caused him to smile.

"Come," he said gently. "Let's have some breakfast."

There was a banquet with all Caspian's most trusted friends and lords; Trufflehunter and Trumpkin and Patterwig and Glenstorm, but otherwise it was a quiet Christmas. Evening found us grouped in the sitting room before the fire while Lucy read her new book aloud, pausing frequently to add her own memories of the scene and pull out mine. Eustace lay on the hearth rug and Dara and Drinian were squished into one chair, while Caspian rested his head in Lucy's lap. At odd moments she would reach down and idly comb her fingers through his hair. As for me, I was sitting on an ottoman that was an island a little apart from everything, and I watched.

A/N: Three brief things--first, the references to Rhiannon are of course born of Domlando Blonaghan's lovely story "Always and Never" which I'm still recommending if you haven't read it. Second, thanks to Andi Horton, who wisely asked some questions about all the diplomacy and what Wensted might say which helped direct this story in a very wonderful way. While I didn't address Wensted specifically in this chapter, never fear, you'll all know what happens. Also, to flyaway, who keeps giving me lovely reviews but who I have no other way of contacting: I'm seeing this story through to the end for sure, even if I do sort of have ADD at the moment with all the stories I've been writing.