Happy Holidays everybody!

There was a small commotion about an hour later when the Bagleys got home, but Harry didn't bother to join them until they called him for dinner. He met Snape's gaze first when he entered the kitchen and tried not to start crying again. That man was the reason his parents were dead. He saw that the seat next to Snape was open and then looked at everyone else, figuring there would be a seat next to Ben. "Potter," Snape called softly.

Harry gulped and moved his gaze from the empty seat. He shuffled around the table and plopped into the seat next to Snape. While they served themselves, he crossed his arms over his chest and stared at his plate –how could he possibly eat anything? "Eat," Snape hissed.

"Make me," Harry hissed back. He yelped when Snape grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled him toward the door. Yells followed after them, but Harry couldn't bring himself to speak.

Snape whipped around and kept Harry's shirt in his fist. "The boy and I are going to have a wee chat in the barn." The anger was obvious in his voice. He cleared his throat and softened his tone. "I won't hurt him, Benny." As if to prove it, he released Harry's shirt and shoved his fists in his trouser pockets as he led him to the barn.

The night air froze Harry straight through and cleared his head. They'd be alone in the barn –anything could happen, nobody would save him. When Snape turned toward him, he puffed out his chest and put on his brave face.

"I am aware that your attitude is in response to me and not meant as an insult to the Bagleys, but you will mind yourself." He narrowed his eyes in consideration. "As a Gryffindor, I imagine you wish to retaliate for what you doubtless view as a personal insult. I can see how it is in everyone's best interest to let you." A cruel smile crossed his lips. "Given that you shot a nail through my hand, and caused me more pain and inconvenience than I would care to admit, I do not see how it is necessary."

"You killed them!" Harry yelled as the wind picked up around them. He wrapped further around himself and tried to hold back his tears. The longer Snape stared in silence, the worse he felt. "It's not fair," he whispered as he sank to his knees. "It's not fair." As he continued crying, Snape slowly walked forward. "I just want a family."

Snape knelt in front of him. "Life is not fair. You can either take the hand you've been dealt and arrange the cards into some sort of house or let them fly in the wind."

Harry rubbed at his eyes. "I trusted you. I like it when you teach me things, even maths."

"Perhaps I should find more things to teach you then," Snape muttered. He shook out his injured hand and groaned.

"F'real?" Harry tried not to look too desperate as he glanced up through his clouded glasses. Snape gave a single nod before leaving him to his thoughts. It still wasn't fair that he had to live with someone who had caused him so much pain, but maybe it could get better. After a few deep breaths, he dragged himself inside to politely eat whatever had been served.

-:-:-:-

The next morning, Harry didn't bother getting up with everyone else and stayed in bed. Ivor was supposed to be in town for the day, and Snape's hand would take a day or two, so he figured they wouldn't be getting any work done anyways. Around 11, he wandered into the kitchen. As he filled a glass with water, he looked out the window over the sink and saw that Snape was out working on the barn alone. He took a swig and placed the glass down on his way out. "Sir?"

Snape inclined his head a bit and leaned forward to keep the slat he was holding in place. "Good morning, Potter."

Harry didn't say anything as he took the weight of the slat and held it still. They continued nailing down slats in silence and he started to feel better. Working with his hands, sweating, was excellent stress relief. Once the sun was beating down on them, Snape told him he was free to go. The comment was awkward and stopped Harry in his tracks. He bounced on his toes while Snape cleaned up. "You could have said something."

"Ben has advised me that I have already said enough," Snape hissed as he shook out his injured hand.

"Well, he's not wrong," Harry muttered. "I would've helped," he whispered as he looked at the barn. The amount of work they'd gotten done was decent.

Snape wiped his hands on his jeans and scowled. "I assume you're loitering in the hopes I'll want to do something with you." He didn't wait for Harry to respond. "Give me half an hour." He scowled and stormed off.

Harry ran inside, grabbed a muffin, and waited the 30 minutes out silently in the yard just in case Snape changed the time he was supposed to wait before their activity. Sometime between sobbing in the barn and barely sleeping, he'd settled out. What Snape and Ben were offering wasn't that bad by comparison. They weren't going to hit him or starve him. Nobody had ever wanted to parent him –so that wasn't new. How bad could it be, living with guardians that didn't love him anymore than the last set?

It was exactly 30 minutes later that Snape strolled out of the house with a bag, 2 fishing poles, and a bucket. "Have you been there the entire time?" he asked as he started walking. Harry nodded and ran just a bit to keep up with his stride.

They walked a good half mile before reaching the stream. Snape set down their things and motioned for Harry to join him in sitting. "Pay attention to how I tie on the hook and set the bait," Snape ordered.

For the first moment, Harry was fascinated, but as he adjusted his position someone across the stream caught his eye. The boy was about his age and height, from what he could see –his olive skin was glowing in Harry's mind's eye as if a ray had shot down from the heavens and engulfed him. Careful not to stare too long, he returned his attention to the hook Snape was setting.

Once he was certain he understood, he began attaching his own hook and yelped loudly when it went through the pad of his finger. "Shit!" He looked back to the boy across the stream, saw that he was staring, and blushed as he looked down.

"Take a deep breath, Potter," Snape grumbled as he carefully took the end of the hook in between his fingers. As Harry breathed in, he pushed it through all the way. He paid no mind to Harry's tears as he tossed him a bandage and retrieved another hook. "Is there an issue?" he asked as he handed it over.

Harry scowled as he applied the bandage. "Hurts," he muttered. Not expecting Snape to care much about his pain, he began tying on the new hook. "Is this good?" he asked as he showed Snape.

The man cast his line out and set his pole in his lap before looking. "Good enough, Potter." He handed over a wiggling, grey worm and cast his eyes back to the river.

They'd been sat for almost 15 minutes when Harry finally got a bite –Snape had already caught one and put it in the bucket. The fish put up more of a fight than Harry had expected one of that size to be capable of, but, as he held it in his hands so that Snape could pull out the hook, he was filled with pride. He threw it in the bucket and helped lay out some newspaper.

Snape took his own, slightly larger fish, out of the bucket, placed it on the newspaper, and slit its throat in one motion. Once it had finished bleeding out, he called Harry over and instructed him to watch. "We'll start with the scales." He went slow the first few movements so that Harry could see but then increased his speed –it was descaled in nearly no time at all and Harry knew he couldn't do it like that. He used a canteen to rinse the rest of the scales off and then threw it back in the bucket. "Your turn."

"My turn," Harry whispered as he took his fish from the bucket and accidently dropped it on the newspaper. At Snape's insistence, he grabbed it firmly and quickly slit its throat. As the blood ran onto his hands and the newspaper, a funny feeling bubbled up in his stomach. He'd just killed something. But he'd also caught his own food –there was something really nice about feeling so connected to the circle of life. It stopped flopping under his hands and he released an excited breath. Without saying anything, or asking if he'd done it right, he picked up the scaler and began. The motion was awkward, but after a few tries it became natural. Once he was sure all the connected scales were off, he poured some water over it like Snape had done and brushed off the loose scales.

He turned the fish over a few times. It looked perfect and just as good as Snape's had. He'd done it! All by himself! "Sir!" he called as he turned. "Dad!" he corrected before he'd even looked at the man.

Snape had a bloodied towel in his lap and a cigarette between his lips, but he'd clearly been watching the whole process. With a small nod, he handed the towel to Harry and spoke around the cigarette. "Good job. Now we gut it."

A huge grin appeared on Harry's face while Snape took things out of the bag. The man had actually complimented him and they hadn't even argued! Snape laid out some supplies and started a small fire while Harry cleaned up. "I assume you are going to eat this," he said as he turned back to Harry.

"I wouldn't have killed it if I didn't want to eat it," Harry said, slightly confused. "I'm not a kid. In order to eat animals, you have to kill them –I know that."

Snape considered him with raised eyebrows. "Knowing it and getting your hands dirty are different, Potter. Not everyone enjoys working so closely with animals." He took his fish from the bucket, placed it down, and moved so that they were on opposite sides of the newspaper. When he picked up one of the two knifes, Harry followed suit. "Look down here and find the anus," he said as he pointed to the lower point of the fish.

"Done," Harry replied as he put the point of the knife on top of the hole. He watched as Snape sliced and then copied the motion.

"Now reach in find the entrails." Snape waited until Harry replied that he had. "Pull." He pulled out his fish's and tossed them on the newspaper between them. Harry's eyes grew in size as he looked at them –they reminded him of potions ingredients –but he lowered his gaze and did it without saying a word.

"Now what?" Harry asked when he noticed the man staring. "Why are you staring?" He felt a blush rise in his cheeks and cleared his throat.

Snape shrugged. "Not many people so readily gut fish. Ben won't. When the Bagleys need animals killed for dinner I usually do it –as you'll see when we visit the cows in the pasture or when the Bagleys buy the chickens they've saved for. Birthing a calf, raising it, caring for it, and then using it as a form of sustenance…."

Harry nodded. "It's the circle of life and it's honest," he muttered. Maybe it was dirty, but he thought he might like to do it and have that connection to his food. Snape just nodded and retrieved the pieces of foil he'd brought. He quickly wrapped both fish and tossed the packages in the small fire. Harry wiped his hands on the bloody towel until they looked mostly clean and then folded up the newspaper while Snape dumped out the water in the bucket. They put all of their tools and garbage in the bucket and sat around the fire.

"Excuse me?" a voice called. Harry looked up to see the boy he'd been staring at standing before them with a tinfoil package in his hands. "I forgot matches. Would you mind?"

Snape nodded and waited until the boy sat to speak. "You're the Proust boy?"

The boy nodded and extended his hand. "Yes. I'm Peter Proust. And you're Severus Snape." He grinned and Harry admired his features –brown hair, brown eyes, brown skin.

"Indeed," Snape said as he shook the hand. "This," he nodded toward Harry, "is my adopted son, Harry." The look on his face was fairly ambiguous, but Harry knew he was a bit annoyed.

"Adopted?" Peter asked sweetly. "He looks quite a bit like you, sir."

Harry scowled and pulled a little bit at his hair. "Do not!"

Peter chuckled and warmed his hands over the flame. "I meant it in a good way, Harry, and it's very nice to meet you both. So how old are you? I've just turned 13 a few months ago."

"Me too," Harry said quietly. He crossed his legs and leaned forward. "Do you live near here, then?"

"I grew up on the farm next to the Bagleys, but we moved into town a few years ago cuz my dad took a job working for the butcher."

They talked for a while before Peter suggested they check the fish and Harry realized Snape had left. He looked around while Peter pulled the fish off and realized everything but his fishing pole was gone. With how much he was enjoying the other boy's company, it was hard to miss Snape. He stood to move the fishing pole near him and used the opportunity to sit next to Peter without it being awkward.

"Where'd Mister Snape go?" Peter asked as he handed Harry a fish.

Harry unwrapped the foil and waited to see how to pick the meat off. "He's actually a professor," he commented.

Peter nodded as he peeled off the meat and started eating. "So," he started and then cleared his throat, "you're not going to live here, then?"

"No," Harry said sadly. He finished off his fish and set the wrapping aside. The warm sensation in his abdomen was new and strange. Though he knew he liked boys in a way that Ron didn't, he'd never really thought about what way that was. "We live in London during the holiday, but we should be here at least another week. And, well, I go to school in Scotland."

"Oh," Peter said quietly. He set aside his foil and laid back on the grass. Harry wasn't sure what to do at first, but Peter took hold of the back of his shirt and pulled until they were laying side by side. "So can we spend some time together before you leave?"

Harry nodded and took a deep breath. "I'd like that."

Peter rested his head on his arms and stretched out. "I work a bit around town. I could get us tickets to the cinema."

"The cinema," Harry repeated. He tilted his head and stared at the other boy's lips for a moment. "Like a date?"

"Only if you'd like."

Without hesitation, Harry answered. "Yes."

"Good," Peter whispered. "I'm supposed to be home for dinner, but I have the number for the Bagleys, so I'll call round once I've checked film times."

Harry nodded and stood with him. While Peter put out the fire and collected his things, Harry picked up his fishing pole and took deep breaths to calm his nerves. He turned back and paused. "Should we hug, or…?"

"Yeah, I think so," Peter said as he stepped closer. They embraced and Harry realized he had no desire to pull away. He tightened his arms around Peter's shoulders and held his breath when the arms around his waist tightened likewise. "I should go," Peter whispered before pulling away. He flashed one last smile before hurrying off.

Despite knowing it wasn't even somewhat subtle, Harry watched until he was out of sight before dawdling home. When he entered and saw that everyone was seated at the table, he set the fishing pole against the wall and took his seat next to Snape. "Sorry I'm late."

"Oh, you aren't late at all, dear," Billie said with a knowing smile. "We were just talking."

Ben ran a hand through his hair and gave an apologetic smile. "Did you enjoy your fishing expedition? I heard you met a boy."

Harry eyed Snape out of the corner of his eye. "Yes. I enjoyed preparing the fish and it was really good –I'm sure you would have liked it sir." Snape nodded but gave no reply. "Thanks for taking me and…I'd like to go see the cows sometime." Again Snape nodded and scowled. "Am I in trouble?"

"No," Snape responded quickly. "Ben and Missus Bagley simply do not believe that you should be helping with the barn or…slaughtering any animals."

"But that's not fair!" Harry whined. "I like building and I like fishing. And I want to work with the cows!" He attempted to stare down Ben and quickly realized he couldn't intimidate the man. How could he possibly intimidate anyone who had spent over 20 years of their life winning arguments against Snape?

Ben crossed his hands on the table. "I do not believe you should be encouraged to kill anything."

The comment stung –did he not think Harry to be mature? Harry looked at each of them and noticed that Snape wouldn't meet his gaze. "Well I reckon I know much more 'bout killing than you do, Doctor Bagley." He matched the man's position and raised his eyebrows. "See, I've killed two men –one of them 3 times now. Have you ever killed anything?" When nobody responded, he changed the subject. "I've got a date with Peter, by the way."

"Good for you," Snape hissed. "Now shut up and go to bed."

Harry opened his mouth to argue but realized what he'd said. The Bagleys were Muggles –they wouldn't know about Voldemort and Snape would have to make all the dangerous things he'd done sound good. "I'm real sorry, sir," he whispered as he stood. "Good night, everybody."