The Darkest Secret
Act Six: Omnilingualism
Serena: Whaaaat?
Starlily11: It means that you can speak every language you can possibly conceive.
Serena: Again…what are you up to?
Starlily11: Wait and see…
Serena went to bed feeling a strange sense of relief. Her friends knew the truth, and nobody hated her. It had gone surprisingly well. Even so, she couldn't help but feel like she'd forgotten to tell them something. For the moment, she couldn't fathom what. Instead, she lay her head down and went to sleep. Dark dreams haunted her, but mercifully, she didn't wake up screaming or out on the balcony mere centimeters from death. Instead, she awoke gasping and in a cold sweat. The blonde stood and walked out, turning her eyes to the sky. The stars shone bright and clear, the sky a serene, majestic scene that covered all creation. It was so beautiful…
A mockingbird landed beside her, and began to sing its usual song. But this time, rather than simply being an impressive series of trills and whistles, it seemed to have meaning. Serena blinked several times, and listened, unable to believe what she was hearing. Amidst all of the gurgles, trills, and whistles, she heard this; "Light, light, lightlightlightlightlight. Is it daytime yet? No…but the night is bright. There's a sun for the night. The sun is out, but the sky is dark."
"Uh, no…that's the moon," Serena replied. The moon was full tonight. Then, Serena realized that she'd just spoken to a bird as though it could understand her. 'What the heck?' she thought.
The mockingbird looked at her. "You understand me?"
"No way…this can't be happening," Serena mumbled. "I am not sitting here having a conversation with a bird."
"Yes you are," the mockingbird informed her. "Do all humans understand me?"
"No…I shouldn't understand you! Oh, God…I'm still talking to a bird…I'm going nuts. It's official, Sere, you've finally cracked…"
"No…you're just smarter than all the other humans."
"No way…I'm stupid…everyone says so! I can't even understand simple math or walk across a flat, even, firm surface without falling on my face!"
"No…you're smart. And honestly, all humans are clumsy. Cats aren't, though, and they're mean. They ate my last mate."
"Do you see any cats with crescent moon markings?" Serena was curious. What did Luna do when she wasn't nagging her about her grades?
"The moon cat is nice…she doesn't bother me or try to eat me."
Serena was frantically trying to do a reality check. She shouldn't be talking to a bird, let alone arguing with one. She was insane…how would she tell her friends that she'd lost her mind? How was she going to explain this to the psychiatrist she would surely be taken to for evaluation? How was she going to tell Luna that she was completely insane? The blonde girl backed away.
"Whoa, you look like you might do that funny thing humans do in the black picture boxes. Ladies do it all the time…they turn really pale and fall down. Are you going to do that?"
"Stop talking…I can't understand you…I am not supposed to understand you…oh, God, why am I still talking?" Serena went back inside, closed the door, and turned to face the bed, breathing deeply. She needed to get a grip. The girl continued to slowly inhale and exhale, trying to calm her nerves and get over this temporary insanity. "Go back to bed, Serena…when you wake up, it will all just be a crazy dream."
The next morning, Serena got up feeling confident that whatever had happened last night had been merely a fantasy; it had just been a bizarre dream. She got dressed and styled her hair in her usual odangoes, then sat down to eat breakfast. Her mother smiled at her and asked if she'd slept well. Serena choked, and almost needed the Heimlich maneuver. Finally, she managed to say that she'd slept okay.
"Any more dreams?"
"Just memories…well, there was this one really weird dream…"
"And?" her mother prompted.
"I started talking to a mockingbird, and I could actually understand what it was saying."
Ilene Tsukino got an odd look on her face. "It was a dream, you say?"
"Yeah," Serena answered casually. She certainly wasn't going to say she'd been wide awake when it had happened; that would get her committed.
"Are you sure?"
"Quite," Serena replied, slipping into her British accent again. "It was bloody weird, though." Serena cleared her throat again and regained her valley-girl American voice. "It was just a dream. Thanks for breakfast." The blonde jumped up and left the house as quickly as possible. She could see birds in the background, but mercifully, she couldn't understand them. Or so she thought.
"…humans these days. They're so wasteful, with no respect for others' homes!" A female cardinal was speaking, and Serena resisted the urge to bang her head against a wall.
"Quite right, my dear," a male cardinal agreed. "It's a dreadful state of affairs."
Serena ran as fast as she could. She felt oddly hot, and strangely lethargic. Why did she feel so sick all of a sudden? Did it have something to do with the fact that she was almost certainly insane? Definitely…the girl sank down against a wall and tried to breathe and remain calm. Wasn't that what you were supposed to do? Or was that for fire emergencies? The blonde wasn't sure. She wasn't really sure of anything anymore. 'I've gone nuts!' the blonde thought. 'What am I going to do?' She stood up and wandered back home, her mind feeling even more cloudy. She flopped down on her bed and tried to clear her head.
"Are you all right, Serena?"Luna asked.
Might as well tell the truth. "No…I'm not."
"What is it?"
"I think I've lost my mind…"
"How so?"
"I just heard two cardinals talking about how humanity is screwed up."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes…and I argued with a mockingbird last night."
"Serena, look at me."
The blonde faced the cat.
Very seriously Luna inquired, "Are you absolutely sure?"
"Yes."
The cat looked into the blonde's eyes. In them, she saw only fatigue, fear, confusion, and growing panic. There was no trace of insanity. The cat concluded that there must be some explanation. So Serena could understand birds…maybe she could understand other things, too. Luna tested this. "Carpe diem," she tried.
"Seize the day? What does that have to do with anything?"
"What did you hear?"
"I heard you tell me to seize the day. It was plain as day, perfect English."
"Serena, I spoke Latin."
"No, you didn't. You spoke English."
Luna was developing a theory. She spoke a full string of sentences in Lunarian, which she still had yet to teach Serena.
"Okay…you just told me that my mother, Queen Selenity, was born on May 26, 5,000 years B.C. You also told me that Darien was a self-centered asshole and that The Odyssey was actually written by a Lunarian poet."
"You're not insane, Serena. I just spoke Lunarian, and you understood everything perfectly. You say it seemed like it was English?"
"Yeah…"Serena wasn't sure where this was going.
"I have good news. You are perfectly sane, and if my guess is correct, you're omnilingual."
"Huh?"
"It means that you can speak every conceivable language, including that of animals."
"So I don't need to see a psychiatrist?"
"No. But first, I need to test it a bit more. Michelle speaks flawless French; I'm going to ask her to speak a few French sentences and see if you understand what she says. Just to see if I'm right. You've spoken to a bird, and you understood Lunarian; I might as well try to see if an earthly language works the same way."
"I hope you're right."
Thirty minutes later, Serena was sitting in front of a slightly confused Michelle and listening to Luna dance around the explanation and simply ask Michelle to speak French to Serena. Michelle looked at the blonde, silently asking her for some hint as to what was going on, but Serena simply gave her a look that said 'Not now.' Finally, Michelle sighed, and began to speak in French. She began with "Parlez-vous français?" Do you speak French?
To her shock, Serena replied, "Oui. Parle-je le français? Si je suis, je serai choqué." Yes. Am I speaking French? If I am, I will be shocked.
"Où avez-vous appris à parler le français? Votre accent est parfait." Where did you learn to speak French? Your accent is perfect.
"Oh, mon Dieu! Je parle le français? Je n'ai aucune idée comment je l'ai appris; il ressemble je sais automatiquement que vous dites!" Oh, my God! I'm speaking French? I have no idea how I learned it; it's like I automatically know what you're saying!
"You honestly didn't realize you were speaking French?" Michelle inquired, switching back to English. "You speak it like a Parisian."
"Now I know that I'm correct," Luna stated. She turned to Serena. "You're omnilingual."
"She can speak any language?" Michelle asked curiously.
"Yes, and I mean every language. I spoke Lunarian to her, and she understood perfectly. Furthermore, I think she can speak to animals."
"Have you always been able to do this?" Michelle asked the blonde.
"Nope…I flunked my French exam."
"it just happened?"
"Yes…and I am seriously freaked out. I thought I was going insane. I seriously spoke French?"
"Yes."
"Okay…does anyone have any idea how this happened?"
"I don't know," Luna replied.
"Oh, great…well, I guess there could be worse things. Like I could just be insane."
"I think we ought to tell Trista about this; she should be able to find out what started all of this. Did anything else happen?"Michelle was thinking. For some reason, this seemed familiar…
"Well, I felt kind of feverish, like my brain felt foggy."
"Hmm…"
"Do you think I might have something screwy with my brain that's somehow making me able to speak every possible language? Could I die?"
"I doubt it," Michelle said reassuringly. "But it's strange."
"No kidding."