Just A Kiss Goodnight
Set: Black
Theme: Regret
By: Usagi Carter
Last Revised: July 19, 2011

Summary: She was too late to tell him…and it was something they'd both regret
Rating: T
Setting: AU Season 1
Character(s): Usagi

Author's Note: Since I came up with a huge list of themes a couple years ago for a livejournal community I was once part of, I figured what better way than to get back into writing SM one theme at a time. There's a long list of the themes, twelve sets with ten themes each – that's 120 different themes. Each set is colored coded, but I may jump around, so pay careful attention to the themes ;). For a full list of the themes, you can visit my power rangers home page – it's under the "Fun Stuff" page. A link can be found on my profile. Or you can email me, I likes email ;)

Dedication: To Ang, Baine, Alicia Blade, Loki, and the countless other friends, fans and authors who've inspired me over the years.

smtk

"People so seldom say I love you and then it's either too late or love goes. So when I tell you I love you, it doesn't mean I know you'll never go, only that I wish you didn't have to." – Annon.

smtk

She sat in the girls' normal booth, her friends chirping excitedly around her, her eyes latched onto the couple at the counter. Her eyes were unseeing but for one thing – the two hands clasped together, and the sparkling diamond sitting on the left ring finger of the pretty brunette with deep brown eyes.

Her own light blue eyes were filled with tears that trickled down the smooth skin of her cheeks unheeded. Her friends weren't paying any attention to her at all, and really, even if they had been, she wouldn't have noticed. Her gaze was locked on the couple; and a striking couple they made. Her mind kept whispering that she knew this day would come, she just hadn't guessed it was going to come so soon. Her heart cried out at the injustice of it all, but really, she had no one to blame but herself.

Her life had been lived thus far with no regrets, and to know this was going to be the one she was going to carry forever tore at her. She'd finally worked the courage up, after months and months of verbal battles and spats, of constantly running into him at every turn, of dreaming about him every single night and wishing things could be different, to tell Mamoru how she felt about him. The only problem was, she'd waited too long to tell him and now she'd never get to.

He was engaged.

She'd walked in to the arcade that morning hoping to talk to Motoki and see if he could help her out and she'd been startled into silence when Motoki bleakly announced that Mamoru had proposed to someone the night before. Heck, she hadn't even known he was dating anyone, let alone serious enough to propose. It had taken all of two seconds for the tears to start, and Motoki had wrapped his arms around her, having known that she was crushing on the raven haired man for months. What's worse was, just as the girls had arrived, so too had Mamoru and his mysterious fiancée. He'd politely introduced the woman to the girls and then they'd sat at the counter while Usagi had, zombie like, sat down in the booth.

"Usa, you okay?" Rei's soft voice called in her ear, finally drawing her attention back to her friends. The others were watching her sympathetically, and she cringed. It startled her when she felt Rei reach out and gently wipe the tears from her face.

"He never once mentioned…." she couldn't finish the sentence, it only caused her lips to tremble. "It hurts. I was too stubborn…I waited too long….now he'll never know."

Ami reached across the table and took her hand while Makoto bit her lip and nodded. Minako looked almost as bad as Usagi as tears shimmered in her crystal blue depths. She had been the one to finally encourage Usagi to stop hiding from her feelings and tell the infamous upperclassman. The odango haired one knew her friend felt responsible.

"Usa…"Minako started, only to see Rei shake her head as Usagi turned her gaze back to Mamoru, who was leaning over and kissing the cheek of the woman next to him. Usagi let out a choking sob before she bolted out of the arcade, the girls calling after her. She never noticed the crushed look on Motoki's face, the snide one on Mamoru's fiancee's face, or the surprised one on Mamoru's.

SMTK

She sat on the dock, shoes off, one foot dangling in the water and the other pulled to her chest, arms wrapped around it. Her eyes were rimmed red and closed against the mid afternoon sun. The ache in her chest had eased, so that now it was only the ache of a broken heart instead of the terrible cries she'd let loose on her run from the arcade. She was tired, only wanted to sleep, but dreams, she knew, would bring no comfort.

'I should have known better, when I first felt like this for him' she scolded herself. 'I should have known not to fall for those deep blue eyes and that strong voice, and for the warm, comforting arms that always seemed to catch me when I klutzed out. It's not like he was ever mine to begin with, I shouldn't have hoped against what I knew in reality would never happen!'

She was so engrossed in her internal argument that she never saw the shadow that fell over her tiny body, never noticed the tall figure that sat down on the dock next to her. At least not until someone's thigh brushed her own, startling her out of her thoughts. Turning, she gasped and her eyes widened when she saw who was sitting next to her.

"You know, Odango, you're one hard girl to track down."

Usagi couldn't help it, she just stared at him, not sure what to say to him. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish trying to breath before she found any words. "What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you," he replied, tilting his head to the side. She knew he was examining her carefully, and knew what he'd see. A flushed face, red rimmed eyes, tear tracks she'd unsuccessfully tried to rub away, and a set of trembling lips. She couldn't fathom what had possessed him to leave the arcade and come searching for her.

"Why?"

He reached out and laid his arm across her shoulders, bringing her to his side so he could lay his head on top of hers, a cheek resting against her odangos. "You ran out of the arcade sobbing and I don't think it was because of something the girls said or did. You worried me."

The broken pieces of her started to shatter further with the caring, worried tone his voice had taken. "I'm okay, really," she protested weakly, her head bowed. "I just got some bad news earlier and I just…I couldn't deal."

"Everything okay at home? With your friends?" he asked, reaching out to tip her chin up. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

She shook her head, and then looked out over the lake. She didn't want to talk to him about this, didn't want to be seen as a childish teenager with a stupid crush on him. She knew she'd rather suffer in silence then be teased or pitied. "No, it's okay. There's nothing you can do, just something I have to learn to accept and move on from."

"Usa…" he murmured, his eyes narrowed as he turned her face back toward him.

"I really don't think it's appropriate for you to be touching me so intimately, do you? I wouldn't want to upset your fiancée." There was just enough bite in her voice to have him startling at her. There had always been an intimacy between the two of them given how many times they'd argued or run into one another. It wasn't quite a friendship but it was something much different than they shared with anyone else.

She could see him turning it over in his head, like a puzzle. "Usa."

"I should be going, it'll be dinner time soon and Mama will want me home," she hurried, reaching over to grab her shoes. He stood while she slipped them on, his face still showing his confusion. "Have a wonderful life, Mamoru-san."

He looked startled when she summed all the courage her tiny body could muster, stood on tip toe, and touched her lips to his. "Usagi!" he gasped softly.

"I love you," she choked in his ear before she took off running. She never looked back and never saw the look of absolute shock and heart breaking regret in Mamoru's expression.