A/N: It's okay, I'm alive. Grace is back in school, and I'm working on everything at once. (Seriously I have 5 different stories that are half or more completed.) I'm easing back into this, but I was shocked to hear from my editor that my 8th novel was back, and ready to go through the final paces. How long will that take, how much of my time will it take? I have no idea. Grace is yelling I need new fanfic out there, so that's a plus for everyone. For everyone asking, Bryce and Sarah will NOT have anymore romantic moments. However, he *might* help Sarah give Chuck a kick in the pants. Guys it's me, I don't go down that road (seriously you don't even know how hard it was for me to write what happened 2 ½ years ago) This is Charah all the way. Slow, Chuck trying to understand, and trust me, he's going to. Lord, he's going to. I give to you Pros and Cons, Ch 7, Feelings
Disclaimer: Don't own Chuck, and I REALLY want that room in my house…it's probably bigger than my house.
"So everyone is assuming I'm taking this job, but I realized I have a few things I have to discuss with the CEO before I am 100% comfortable with this, so if you'll excuse me I need to talk to him," Sarah said.
"Can you do it after the team meeting?" Ellie asked. "We really need to talk about a few things." Sarah turned to her and they shared a look for a second. A soft smile came to Ellie's face.
"I could, but I think now is the perfect time," Sarah said. Ellie nodded her head slowly, trying not to vibrate. "I promise I won't take longer than absolutely necessary. Ellie never broke her gaze from Sarah.
"Carina, Casey, OUT!" Ellie said.
"Casey's already fled," Carina groused, leaving. As soon as she passed the doorway, she ran over to Anna. "I have the bug set, can you turn it on?" Anna smile, and turned on the receiver, when they felt her behind them.
"I know you two aren't listening in on my brother and Sarah," Ellie began. They stood there a moment, before Ellie smiled. "Without asking me to listen in." Carian grinned.
"Just waiting on you, Girl," Carina said. Back in the bedroom, Sarah shut the door, and turned to Chuck.
"I'm trying to figure out how to say this, because you know me, words aren't my strong suit," Sarah said.
"Uh, I really need to get dressed for the meeting," Chuck said, very nervous and worried.
"Chuck I'm taking the job, but there is something you have to know before we begin, because I can't go on like this," she said. Fear gripped Chuck. She crossed the room and took his hand. He looked down at it and up at her, confused. "Chuck, I'm not going to leave you. I know that is your biggest fear that everyone is going to leave you, but Chuck, no one, and I mean no one has stood beside me like you have. You are now and forever a part of my life, okay?" Chuck nodded, still looking worried.
"I don't like that Ellie ordered you like that. I'm gonna talk to her," Chuck said. Sarah squeezed his hand.
"Is anything she said untrue?" Sarah asked. Chuck shook his head. "Then I'm going to as she asked," she said, with a challenging tilt to her head and a mysterious smile that dared him to fight her on it. "Okay, we need to talk about something and I need you to hear the actual words coming out of my mouth instead of what you want to hear. Do you understand me?"
"Can I go into the bathroom while you talk so I can get dressed?" Chuck asked. Sarah shrugged. "Not all of us have been inside and are as comfortable being half dressed around others." Sarah stuck her tongue out at him, and Chuck laughed. He grabbed his clothes, went into the bathroom and shut the door ¾ of the way shut. "Okay, I can hear you."
"How do you know, I haven't said anything," Sarah replied.
"Seriously did you get more sarcastic in there?"
"Chuck, I need you to be serious and listen," Sarah began. Chuck stuck his head out the door, nodded, and made a zipping motion on his lips. He disappeared. "I need to talk to you about last night, and what Ellie said and 2 ½ years ago." She took a deep breath. "You mean the absolute world to me, I need you to understand that, and you are different than me, and Bryce, and probably everyone." Outside Ellie turned to Carina.
"Can they hear us?" Ellie whispered. Carina shook her head, and Ellie smiled. "Get him, Girl," she said.
"I've been with guys, sexually," Sarah began, and she heard Chuck groan. "Shut up and listen." There was nothing from the bathroom so she went on. "But I have never really had a relationship with someone I cared for. Most of the time, it was a physical release, a satisfaction of physical need, nothing emotional, nothing romantic. Still, I didn't really know that until last night." Chuck's head shot through the door, his face panicked. "Nothing happened sexually last night, Chuck, but something happened." The look on his face turned to confusion. She walked over to the door and pushed it open. He was shirtless, with pants on, no socks and something ran through her that she was having a very hard time controlling.
"Don't stop now," Ellie muttered. She heard Sarah take a deep breath. Sarah took both of his hands.
"Chuck, 2 ½ years ago I made the biggest mistake, and regret of my life," Sarah began. Go on, she thought to herself. Get it out there, he has to know, even if you can't be together he has to know what he means to you. "I slept with Bryce Larkin and it was stupid. I was hurt, I thought the man I cared about more than anyone else in this world hated me. Bryce thought the guy who he cared about more than anyone else in this world hated him. We were stupid, we were drunk, we were hurting and we sought comfort. We shouldn't have, and please don't blame yourself for any of this. I tell you this, because I don't think you understand how little it meant to either of us. That night meant nothing, but I have had a night that meant everything , and no one was without their clothes, there was no sex, nothing physical, but there was something there, something powerful. It was last night, Chuck. Last night was everything and you need to understand that. Last night all I did was hold you, and stroke that curly hair that you had better never get cut, because I love those animal shapes it makes and I love running my fingers though it. That night meant more than the night I had with Bryce, or any other night . He's moved on, he's with Carina; I've moved on because there was nothing there. He didn't visit me in jail because it was too awkward. Do you get it? There is no me and Bryce, and you are the most important person in my life, and I will do whatever it takes to protect you. Do you understand?" Chuck nodded.
"Don't cut my hair, got it," he said. Sarah stared at him.
"I literally have just strung more words together than I ever have in my entire life and all you got out of it was don't cut your hair?"
"Sarah, that's the only part I could process immediately," Chuck replied. "You've hit me with a lot, and you're right my mind doesn't work that way. My feelings don't, they can't move that fast.."
"I know, Chuck," she said, squeezing his hands. She kept trying not to stare at him, but she only had so much willpower, and it was taking all of it not to drag him over to that bed.
"Oh, I wish we weren't here right now," Ellie said to Carina. "I think they'd get this whole thing sorted out."
"No," Carina answered, shaking her head. "He's not there yet. He's thought one way for 2 ½ years, and although Sarah has told him everything, his mind…it processes things like a puzzle and she's just thrown pieces at him he's not ready for and doesn't know how to fit together yet.." Ellie looked at Carina.
"You really do get him," Ellie said. Carina gave a small nod.
"What can I say, Chuckles gave me a career and I think the world of him. She's the one for him," Carina answered. Ellie smiled.
"I'm glad you feel that way," Ellie said.
"So, nothing more about Bryce," Chuck said. "Got it." Sarah nodded and let go of his hands. "Sarah, thank you. I know talking isn't something you enjoy. I mean about feelings, especially yours, so, thank you." He said. Sarah took his face in his hands, tilted it down, gave him a soft kiss on the lips, more than a peck, and then rested her forehead against his.
"I'm here for you, Chuck, the same way you've been here for me," Sarah said, looking into his eyes. "I found my home, and you and your family, and your team…you're all my home, Chuck. You're my home." She gave him a peck on the lips and left the room. Chuck stood there, with no idea what to do now. Eventually it dawned on him to get dressed, so he did.
-ooooo-
"Today is exactly why we have these SOPs in place," Ellie said, looking around the room. Chuck and Sarah were sitting on the loveseat together, Chuck's thoughts a million miles away. Sarah kept looking at him, not worried, or concerned, just kind of making sure he was okay. He would glance at her and give her a reassuring smile and when she'd look away he would watch her as if he was thinking and gears were turning. Ellie looked up and saw Casey watching the two of them. She swore he muttered the word "ladyfeelings". Ellie smiled. She had watched the rest of the room and they had all been watching Chuck and Sarah this entire time. Chuck was oblivious, and Sarah wasn't surprised, begin the "new person" on the team.
"Bartowski's rules make all the sense in the world, and here's why," Casey blurted out. He then reddened and turned to Ellie. "Sorry Ellie."
"Oh, no, Casey, I was about to have you break it down for the non-government backgrounds in the room," Ellie said with a smile. Casey nodded a thanks.
"If they take one of us, it lets the rest of us know to be on alert," Casey explained. Ellie was passing out a paper to sign. "Again, Ellie?"
"Casey, the lawyers say if we're going to be involved in this kind of business, we have to, it's to protect Bryce and Chuck," Ellie explained.
"No one is going to sue them," Carina countered.
"I know I'm new, but if it protects them, don't we have to?" Sarah asked. Chuck was pulled out of his daze with that. Bryce was chuckling.
"I'm not worried and I'm pretty sure Chuck isn't either," Bryce said. Sarah reached for one of the papers and began to sign it. Carina rolled her eyes.
"Jeez, Blondie, whipped?" she asked, grinning, but looked at Bryce and did the same. Everyone took one, grumbling but signing the papers. Ellie looked at Sarah and smiled. Chuck looked over at Bryce.
"We need a board meeting," Chuck said to his partner. Bryce raised an eyebrow. "Board room when we're done."
"Uh, buddy, I have to take care of some stuff with Ellie," Bryce said, grinning.
"Actual work, Bryce," Chuck said. Ellie grinned, she had a good idea what they were talking about.
"So you're going in to the company today?" Sarah asked. Everyone snickered.
"No, they have a 'boardroom' here they supposedly get work done in," Carina explained. "They swear it helps them think." Bryce grinned. "Chuck, your PA needs to know where to find you." She thought for a second. "You haven't been in there since she's been here have you?"
"No," Chuck replied. "I've had a lot to do." Morgan glanced at Anna. They both grinned.
"Well, I believe we're about done here for today, does everyone understand the importance of these SOPs after these types of missions?" Ellie asked.
"Yes, Mom," Carina said. "Now for more important things, are the five of us going out Friday night?" Ellie smiled. "You, me, Zondra, Anna, and Sarah?"
"Me?" Sarah asked.
"Yeah," Anna said, grinning. "Unless you can't hang with us."
"Oh, I don't know, I've not been to a club in a while."
"We got your back," Zondra said, throwing her arm around Sarah's shoulders. "Welcome to the CAT squad."
"The CAT squad?" Sarah asked.
"Clubing Away Tonight," Bryce replied. "Morgan was trying to be funny with an acronym and the girls ran with it to prove a point."
"I'm a member?" Sarah asked, confused. "I haven't been out clubbing in two years," Sarah protested.
"We got you," Zondra said. The other three all agreed. "Come on, you go with us to find a dress and see if we can't make some of these guys realize what they're missing."
"Guys, I'm not looking for anything like that," Sarah said.
"You don't understand, Sarah," Ellie said. "We got your back, as in, we run off anyone who tries anything. If you do want someone, we got your back there to." Sarah looked over at Chuck.
"Hey, I'm not your keeper," he said grinning. She gave him a look. "Sarah, go have fun."
"But you'll be all alone," Sarah said. She looked around a little embarrassed. "Sorry."
"Sarah, you know he's been alone pretty much since he started this company," Anna said softly. "Go, have fun, he'll be here when you get home, which he'll have to pour you into bed when we get done with you." Sarah grinned.
"It does sound fun," she admitted. "Okay." Chuck got up and walked down the hall, and she followed after him. "Hey, can I see it?" Chuck turned, and grinned at her.
"I don't know, you might run away when you see exactly how nerdy I am," he replied. He opened the door and she walked in, with a low whistle. "That's a 98 inch TV in case you're wondering. Every gaming system, two gaming chairs, a couch, pool table, fully stocked bar and mini fridge." She turned toward him and he shrugged. "I'm a nerd, and sometimes being in my element lets me concentrate. She walked up to him and pulled him into a hug.
"Be your best nerd then, Chuck," she said, holding him. "Are you sure me going to the club is okay with you? You being alone?"
"Sarah," he said, pulling away. "That's my family, and we both know you can look after yourself. We're housemates. I mean even if we were in some kind of relationship I would never tell you not to do something."
"Oh, I know," she said, with a smile. "I'm just asking if you're okay with it."
"Well, I mean if we were in a relationship I would hope you would respect our relationship," Chuck said, grinning. She smiled with the left side of her mouth.
"So whatever I do should be in respect to our relationship," Sarah said, nodding. "I guess then we should both agree on that relationship if we were together."
"Absolutely," Chuck replied. "I mean it's obviously your life, I would just think getting back into the swing of things one should maybe be careful."
"So phone numbers only from guys, no dates," she said, her mouth still twisted in a small smile. She pulled out her phone. "Wanna be my first?" she asked, with an arched eyebrow. Chuck looked at her, and began to stammer. "I mean if they're drunk and I need something, I don't even have your phone number."
"Right," he choked out, and put his number in her phone. He gave it back to her, and she hit call.
"There, now you have mine, in case you ever need to call," she said. "For anything."
"Anything?" he asked, as she walked out.
"Anything" she replied. She passed Bryce. "You two have fun, I'm going with Carina and Zondra to see about a dress."
"You know I would go with one that accentuates your legs," Bryce said. "Some guys really like that." Sarah winked at him, and left. Bryce turned to Chuck, and shut the door behind him. "You are so in over your head."
"We need to talk," Chuck began.
"I've been waiting for this for a long time," Bryce said, sitting in one of the chairs. He patted the other beside him and Chuck sat down. "See, when a momma and a daddy love each other very much," he began. Chuck backhanded him.
"Or in your case, get horny," Chuck said. Bryce shrugged and grinned. "Sarah had a very interesting conversation with me." Bryce looked at him. "I think you need to know I was really mad at you for a while." Bryce nodded.
"You should have been," Bryce said. Chuck was confused. "I slept with the girl you loved, even if you couldn't admit it."
"I never, uhm, I mean, we aren't, erm," Chuck babbled.
"As adorable as it is to watch you go on," Bryce said, grinning. "Everyone knows you love her, except her, I think. She's so busy trying to convince herself she doesn't deserve you that I don't think she's even stopped for a moment to realize how deep her feelings are for you."
"She's right, she deserves better than me," Chuck replied. Bryce fell back in the chair groaning.
"You two are complete and utter idiots," he said. "IDIOTS!" He sat back up. "Dude, she thinks she doesn't deserve you because she's a felon, or ex-con or whatever it is she's labeled herself.
"That's ridiculous," Chuck said.
"As ridiculous as you not dating her because of me?" Bryce asked.
"Dude, she approached you that night," Chuck said.
"TO CON ME YOU IDIOT!" Bryce yelled. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "Do you know why she didn't?"
"Because she fell in love with you, and couldn't," Chuck replied. "She told me." Bryce narrowed his eyes.
"I want to know EXACTLY what she said."
"Uh, let me think," Chuck said, trying to replay the conversation in his head. "Oh, I fell in love and couldn't complete the con." Chuck looked quite pleased with himself. Bryce was smiling and shaking his head.
"Did she use my name?" Bryce asked. Chuck shook his head. "Were you being your usual you two have to be together self?" Chuck nodded. Bryce sat there a second. "Huh, I guess she has decided she is in love." Chuck's mouth was open, and not working. "I see the gears trying to turn. Come on, Chuck, use that brain of yours, Sherlock. When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. And believe me, it's not that improbable, you just got so stuck on the wrong girl you never noticed anyone else."
"Bryce, did you sleep with her because I hurt you?" Chuck asked softly.
"That's really an oversimplification but, yeah," Bryce replied. "We were both hurt, drunk, looking for comfort. I did try and stop her, but I don't know if you've noticed, she's very attractive."
"Oh, I've noticed," Chuck replied, staring off into space, nodding. "I've noticed." Bryce grinned.
"Anyway, like I said, I tried to do the right thing, but dude," Bryce just stopped. "I should have said no, and meant it."
"No, you're both adults," Chuck replied.
"Chuck, we knew it would hurt you, we both did, and we didn't care, and I'm sorry, I really am," Bryce said, sorrow on his face. Chuck shook his head.
"I do believe I said I never wanted to see either of you again," Chuck reminded him. He looked at him for a moment. "She really didn't pull the con because of me?" Bryce nodded.
"So what are you going to do?" Bryce asked. Chuck shrugged.
"I mean she just got out of prison, she has a life to rebuild, I'm her boss, it would be weird, I'm still not for sure I'm best for hekmrph," Chuck said, Bryce's hand over his mouth. Chuck looked up at him.
"Chuck, when asked, what are you going to do about Sarah, the correct answer is be with her, be happy, talk to her, work it out, because, my friend, you've got another shot, and you don't want to waste it," Bryce said patiently. "Don't hate yourself one day for not trying." Bryce removed his hand.
"But what if I mess it up?" Chuck asked.
"Then at least you tried," Bryce replied, standing. "I gotta go help Ellie." Chuck nodded, in thought. "Chuck, it's time." Bryce left and found Ellie in the living room. "Come on, that idiot isn't going to do anything. We need help."
"What's wrong with him?" Ellie asked.
"He's scared to be hurt again," Bryce explained. "He's more scared of being hurt than scared of losing her, and we have to do something, and soon." The two got in the car to go to Jack's lawyer. Ellie prayed Al had something that would work, her brother deserved the best, and so did her soon to be sister…if they could make this work.
A/N: Next time on Pros and Cons, the Von Hayes Remix….Plus a little vs the seduction for good measure. Oh, yes I did…Hope you liked it, reviews and PMs are always welcomed…Take Care
DC